Part 11
"It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was."
-Anne Sexton-
Jarod paced around the RV, angry at Parker and himself. She was going to see her father. How could she want anything to do with that man after everything he put her through? He had asked her as much.
"I have to see him," Parker said once she got over the surprise at finding out her father was alive.
"Parker, no," Jarod said desperately, ignoring the glare she gave him. "It's too dangerous. The Centre is after you."
"There are things I need to know…answers I need from him," Parker said as she paced around.
"And what makes you think he'll give you the truth?" Jarod asked. Everything was spinning out of control, just as he feared it would, and he was becoming angry. "He's done nothing but lie to you repeatedly. He doesn't deserve another chance!"
"He's my father, Jarod!" Parker exclaimed.
"Is he? Or have you forgotten that he lied about that, too?"
Parker stopped dead in her tracks and stared at him. "I'm not an idiot," she began in a low tone. "I know damn well that my father isn't a saint, but it doesn't mean that I can love him any less. What would you do if you found out things about your mother or father that were just terrible? Would you stop looking for her? Would you cut off contact with your father?"
"My parents aren't murdering, manipulating monsters who would sacrifice their own family for power," he ground out, staring at her harshly.
"How do you know?" Parker demanded, getting in his face. "The truth is that you don't really know them at all. For years you've probably painted this perfect picture of them, but when you finally do get to know them, they'll probably be far from what you've imagined," she finished. With another glare, she turned away from him and resumed her pacing.
Jarod was trying hard to control his fury. His family was nothing like hers and if she was too blind to see them for what they really were then he couldn't help her. Deciding to leave before he said something he would regret, he pulled on his clothes from earlier and packed his things.
"That's right, Jarod, run like always," Parker accused. She watched as he gave her one last look before stepping out into the hallway, the door closing firmly behind him. "Well, fuck him," Parker said to the empty room, angry as tears spilled down her cheeks. She should have known that things wouldn't have worked between them anyway. There was simply too much baggage and he ended up leaving just like everyone else.
Wiping her tears away, she turned the lamp off and climbed back into bed. First thing in the morning, she was leaving. She had her reasons for wanting to see her father, despite his shortcomings, and she didn't need Jarod's approval or permission to do so.
Miss Parker didn't sleep one wink the rest of the night. When morning finally arrived, she took a shower and packed up her belongings. How could things have changed so drastically in a few short moments? All of Jarod's talk about his faith in her had obviously been bullshit. As soon as things got complicated, it was him who ran, not her, and she'd be damned if she was going to give chase this time. He could run as far and as fast as he wanted and he wouldn't have to worry about seeing her over his shoulder anymore.
Checking the room one last time for anything she might have forgotten, Parker closed the door and made her way to the parking lot. Once outside, she looked around for the RV, but didn't see it. He really did leave. Giving a bitter laugh, she climbed into her car and sped out of the parking lot.
-----
Jarod sat in his newly rented SUV, trying to decide what he should do. Earlier, he had gone back to the hotel room to find that Parker had left. His intentions, last night, had been to go sleep in the RV to cool off, but he had obviously given the wrong impression. Parker was gone when he went back to the room and she wouldn't have seen the RV on her way out because he had gone to see about getting rid of it. Before, he had been angry at Parker and himself, but now he was mostly angry with himself. He thought things would be different since their relationship had progressed and he hated the fact that it had been so easy to fall back into old habits. She had hit a nerve with his family. Every wrong that had ever been done to them was because of the Centre and he was aggravated that she would even think of comparing them or suggest that they might not be good people.
Pulling out his cell phone, he fingered the buttons, hating himself for wanting to call Sydney. He could solve the most complex math equations and learn how to perform brain surgery just by reading a book, but he couldn't figure out what to do with one woman. Granted, Parker was no ordinary woman. She was the most frustrating, moody, difficult woman he ever knew, but he loved her. She was nowhere near as nice as Nia had been, or as fun loving as Zoë, but he wouldn't change a thing about her. She wouldn't be Parker otherwise.
Sighing deeply in the quiet interior of the vehicle, he started the engine and pulled out into traffic. He realized that he shouldn't have tried to stop her from seeing her father in the first place. As much as he hated the comparison, he realized the point she was trying to make. He couldn't love his family any less if he had found out terrible things about them. Now, all he had to do was find Parker and try to make things right. Her father had a way of manipulating her like no one else and their argument may have made her vulnerable. If he took the next flight to Delaware, maybe he could catch her before she went to see him.
-----
Parker stared at the mansion from where she stood on a hill, watching for any movement. Her father didn't usually take any sweepers home with him, but a lot had changed since she last saw him. Aside from stops and rest breaks, it had taken her nearly a days worth of driving to get there. There were even a few instances where she had changed her mind about the whole thing, but, in the end, she had to give her father one last chance and now, here she stood.
It was past midnight, but there were still a few lights on. Parker knew that her father liked to read in his study before bed or when he couldn't sleep and she wondered what was keeping him up this time. Centre secrets and lies, probably.
Checking her weapon, she holstered it and began looking for the best point to enter. She remembered trying to talk him into getting security cameras for outside, but he always refused, saying that he could protect himself. Now, she was glad that he never listened to her as she snuck down to the back entrance. One thing she did manage to keep with her, after the explosion, was her keys. She still had the key to her Porsche, though it did little good, and she had the keys to her house and her father's, which made entering very easy. She slid the silver key into the lock, pushing it open gently and immediately turned to shut it as she heard the beep of a security system. She moved to it quickly and prayed that the code was still the same. Punching in the four digit number, she listened and breathed a sigh of relief when it beeped twice, indicating that she got the code right. Things would have been so much easier if she'd had Broots to help her.
Turning around, she looked at the sterile kitchen before her, only lit by a light above the sink. The counters were empty, not one dish or container in sight. Her father had always been a real stickler about clutter. One time, when she was a little girl, she remembered waking up for a midnight snack of peanut butter and jelly. When she was done, she sat all of her dirty dishes in the sink and went back to bed. The next morning, as she came downstairs, she heard her father reprimanding the maid for leaving such a mess. It was one of the few times as a little girl that she had ever seen her father being anything other than nice and kind and it scared her. Later on, secretly, she apologized to the maid named Lily, who assured her that it was alright. Lily was always so nice to her and she always made time to talk to her about stuff when her father was busy, which was more often than not. She never saw the woman anymore after that week.
Passing through the kitchen and the living room, Parker walked down a long hallway until she came to her father's study doors. There was light beneath and she took a deep breath, assuming that he would be inside. She eased one of the doors open quietly to confront him and let out her breath when she saw that the room was empty. Maybe he had forgotten to turn off the lamp. Shutting the door, she decided to have a closer look around. So many of the good memories she had of her father had taken place in that room. When she was a little girl, she remembered waking up in the middle of the night to find him sitting in his chair by the fire, reading some old book. He would always welcome her to join him and she would climb into his lap while he continued to read aloud. As she would doze off, she remembered him reciting a poem to her:
Come, cuddle your head on my shoulder, dear,
Your head like the golden-rod,
And we will go sailing away from here
To the beautiful land of Nod.
She always loved to hear him recite it and she would never forget those nights where it was just the two of them, simply father and daughter. The only thing that could have made it more perfect was if her mother had been there, too. No matter what anyone said about her father, she knew in her heart that he wasn't all bad. She did have some good memories of him and she wasn't going to let anyone take them away, not even Jarod. She knew that he had good reason for hating her father, but she couldn't help but love him, even with his many faults.
Every wall from floor to ceiling was lined with bookshelves and every bit of shelve space was taken. Parker walked along and ran her fingers across the old books. Some of them were antiques, books so old that collectors would pay hundreds of thousands for them. It was one of the very few normal activities that her father had, collecting antique books. So engrossed in her memories, she didn't hear the door opening until it creaked. She turned around quickly with her gun aimed and scowled when she saw who it was. "What the hell are you doing here?"