"Curses, curses, curses, curses, curses!" Mitsuru yelled all the way to the dorm. The rest of the team wisely chose to walk behind her... except for Minato who was skating on the trail of ice that the redhead had left in her wake. She was that enraged.
"Uh, bro," Akihiko whispered but quickly shrunk back as the heiress looked over her shoulder and gave him a frosty glare. The boxer whimpered like his ass was on ice and quickly quieted down.
After kicking the door down, Kirijo stepped inside the dorm and walked up the stairs without a word. The rest stepped in shortly after and released a collective sigh, except for the snarky blue haired asshole.
"Yeah!" Minato yelled. "That was fun! I need to piss her off more often." Ice skating was the shit!
"Don't do it, man. Please, for all of us," Akihiko winced as he pulled out one of the many icicles stuck to his ass. "You never know when its that time of the month for her. She's already destructive enough."
Arisato thought for a while. "When did you get ice on your ass, though?"
"My persona is weak to ice, ironically... but it kinda makes sense, doesn't it?"
"Your per-what now, bruh?" The hell was a persona?
"A persona is-" Akihiko tried to explain, but...
What was that walking in front of the dorm's window? A cute chick?! "Ain't nobody time fo dat!" Minato exclaimed, interrupting his friend.
Mitsuru's high pitched, frustrated yell came from upstairs. It probably didn't sound as she'd like to make it sound, though, much for Arisato's amusement.
"... Errbody got time fo dat," the blue haired asshole snarked, whipping around. "Well, I might not be working as a dog catcher, but..." he faced the door. "I'm off..." the camera zoned to his face.
"To get..." closer.
"Some..." closer.
"Bitches!" finally, the camera went through a reset and he ran outta the dorm.
"..."
"..."
The employee sat in front of his boss' chair.
"What is it, my good man?" The older man asked.
"Um, sir, I'd like to ask for a raise in my paycheck."
"Why is that?"
"Aside from the obvious, I'm beginning to think my job is starting to become dangerous to my health... you see, I had to close in on Arisato's face, and my right eye began to bleed... Seriously."
"Oh... he's that ugly right now, isn't he?"
"Yes, sir. I'm sorry to ask this of you, but please... I love this job, but it's starting to take a toll on me. The things I had to film until now did a number on me, already."
"Alright... we have a deal."
The boss and the cameraman shook hands.
... he does realize that he looks uglier than a vagina on a freaking peri-"
"Shhhhh!" Akihiko hushed the female. "We don't want that kinda stuff on our PG district."
"..."
"... Ya dumb broad!" Yukari pulled out the same pistol from her bra and shot the boxer on his other leg. One middle finger later, she walked away, leaving the boxer alone.
He put another one of the special pills in his mouth. "Gotta restock this."
...
The headlines were going crazy. Mitsuru Kirijo and a couple of other morons spent the entire night locked up behind bars. It was unheard of! The daughter of Takeharu Kirijo was in jail. Next to her was an angry brunette with her bra hanging out, a roided up gym junkie with one good leg and a spiky haired fool who looked like he had dropped the soap too many times.
"Well, that happened," Minato didn't give a shit. He was young. This shit was expected to happen.
He spent the entire night the bar, getting smacked by girl after girl, further damaging his already bruised face. He returned to the dorm when it was nearly morning. Our hero stepped inside, high as Himalaya and still just as stupid as he left.
"I'm home!" he called. Everyone was already in the lounge since they obviously didn't have school tomorrow.
"Sup dude?" Akihiko greeted him.
"Just taking care of business," Minato nodded at him, lumbering his way towards the couches.
"Keep it up," the older teen gave him a thumbs up.
The girls growled at him.
"You know, I told him before, you look uglier than a vag-Beep on peri-Beep..." Yukari trailed off to a whisper. "Just what the hell are you doing!?"
"Beep!" Minato said. "Beep beep beep!"
"Shut up!"
"Beep!"
"What is the meaning of this!?" Mitsuru growled, infuriated by the constant racket.
"Beep beep beep!" Minato shrugged. "I'm just censoring shit here, ladies, because some people just swear too fucking much," he said. "Somebody better take some goddamn responsibility in this bitch, right, mah man?" he turned to Akihiko.
The redhead finally knocked him out by a hammer strike to his temple. Arisato stumbled forward and toppled over, finally drifting to sleep.
"I can't believe I'm saying this but..." she snarled at his sleeping form. "His previous gimmick was much much better."
"Unfuckwithable though," Yukari started and the two seniors whipped around to face her. "W-What?! Shut up!"
"..."
"... Well, then do it," Akihiko said nonchalantly.
"Over here!?" Takeba cried.
"... I meant to change his gimmick back."
"Do I have to pull a lever or something?"
The seniors faced the brunette once again. "Takeba, look, we try, alright, we try to clear that image of yours, but you're not really helping yourself, here," the male said.
"Ugh, whatever!" the irate brunette had enough for the night. She quickly walked away.
"Do it then," Akihiko repeated.
"I am not touching him," Mitsuru fumed. "I am not placing my hand on plebeian filth!"
"... Bitch, you slept with him during the first week!"
"What was that!?" Kirijo balled her fist up and Akihiko's ass immediately caught ice once again.
"I mean, good night!" The young man nodded, waved and limped his way towards his room.
Mitsuru had half a mind to drag her investment towards his room but right now, she was too pissed to act like a sensible business-woman. The empress stalked away, leaving our hero sleeping alone... for the moment.
Akihiko came downstairs when the coast was clear. He lifted his junior and slowly made his way up the stairs. The boxer finally made it to the end of the second floor, opened the door to Minato's room, commented on how it smelt nice and carefully rested the blue haired Fool on his bed.
...
...
Minato awakened a little too harshly as he felt a weight on his chest and something wrapped around his throat. Pair of hands, it wasn't the first time someone was trying to choke him to death however, it was Mitsuru or Yukari, it was another female, someone he had briefly met before.
"You wretched little devil!" Elizabeth growled, sitting on top of his chest. "How dare you sleep after doing that to us!?"
Minato forgot all about the pain in his throat because that chick was a bombshell. She was gorgeous. She was rare. She was feisty. She was wife material, she might be into necrophilia but that was okay, because she was out of the world beauti-
All those thoughts stopped when Elizabeth accidentally brushed his hair and Minato hit the limit.
The blue haired badass exploded out of her grip and Elizabeth backed away as her guest stared her down. "Wrong move, bitch!" he warned. "I've been breaking backs, getting bitches and shoving pride pills down people's throats since the first goddamn day of my life!"
Elizabeth arched an eyebrow. Luckily, it was the Dark Hour so she could get as violent as she pleased.
"I'm gonna make you my wife," Minato said with swag. "You're gonna be mistress Arisato for the night."
"..."
Elizabeth didn't respond so the boy charged at her. Nobody had stopped him before, there was no one who could mess with the sacred blue hair, anyone who touched it would get maimed, no question about it and he was going to relish inflicting pai-
All that stopped when Elizabeth bitch-slapped the Fool to the side the room, making him crash against the sink, which crumbled to pieces.
"... Ow,"
Elizabeth cracked her knuckles and marched forward for some more payback but halted when she saw the expression on Minato's face.
"..."
"...
"H-Hey," Minato murmured.
Elizabeth went closer.
"... Add me on myspace?" he requested. It was probably due to the water but Minato's spiky hairstyle had morphed into his usual emo cut.
Our protagonist was back to his roots, the snarky blue haired douche was long gone, dismissed like it was a bad hair day and made a mental note to apologize to all the people he had insulted.
"This is unexpected," Elizabeth said. "Your personality seems to change with your hairstyle."
"I got no friends... Except Tom," Minato sniffed."Even he doesn't give a fuck anymore."
Elizabeth had half a mind to march over there and change his hairstyle once again to get rid of the mindbogglingly annoying gimmick he had right now but unfortunately for her, the Dark Hour ended and life returned to the world.
"Oh, Philemon," Elizabeth sounded disappointed. "It seems I have run out of time. Oh well, I, Elizabeth shall return one day experiment freely with the wonders of human hair."
"... Bitch, you ain't gonna touch em," Minato spat.
"We will see about that," Elizabeth hummed. "Since my brother and I have no place to stay, we will visit you often."
"... Does he have a myspace account?" he asked hopefully.
"... I believe the correct phrase would be," Elizabeth thought for a while. "You absolutely suck."
Minato sniffed. "I know," he watched on as the female disappeared into thin air.
Things were back to square one as Minato had lost all the snark and charisma. The sad teenager stood up and sniffed. "Leave me alone, why don't you..." he staggered towards his desk and sat his ass on the seat, booting up his laptop.
Minato opened his myspace profile and sighed. Not a single friend request, hell not even Tom replied to him anymore. Minato rested his chin on the desk and consoled himself. "They'll add me, I just know it." and so he waited.
...
Meanwhile, Mitsuru was lying on her diamond encrusted bed, with dozens of diamond darts at her side which she occasionally chucked at a photo of Minato on the other side of the room... and missed every time.
"I can't believe it," she went insane and threw every dart in the direction of the photo but still, it never hit the photo. "Aaaaargh!" the ruler of all let out a loud yell, extremely frustrated by what had happened.
Taking a deep breath, she reached out for her laptop, booted it up and logged onto the student forums. At times like this, she would browse the database and expel the student she thought looked stupid. She couldn't do that with Minato because he was already suspended.
...
...
The ruler of everything widened her eyes at some of the new topics in the student forum. "What is this...?" she wondered.
"HELP! I'm getting stalked by demons!"
"My clock gets stuck at 12!"
"Why is everyone dead!?"
"The time this was posted was..." Mitsuru blinked. "12..." How could that be!? how was that student posting in the Dark Hour?
"Could it be?" Maybe that student was all alone during the Dark Hour? Maybe that student needed help? Maybe he/she was dying and was reaching out to a hero to save him/her.
"Not enough hype to the premise," Mitsuru shrugged and kicked her laptop to the side. The redhead turned on her side and drifted to sleep.
...
...
The internet was getting out of hand. Students were far more engrossed in social media and porn sites than studying. It was disastrous for the generation and sadly, no one cared to set things right, except for one man...
That one man was the sword of righteousness in the darkness. He was going to save the generation and enlighten them because they had their heads way too far up their asses.
Ekoda stared down his current nemesis, the biggest modem in all of Iwatodai. That was the root of all evil. He didn't make a single sound and effortlessly committed the biggest crime in all of the city.
... He blew the modem up and departed quickly. No one caught wind of hero who disappeared in the night.
Soon, anarchy spread all over the student body in Iwatodai.
...
..
"My porn!" Junpei cried.
"My porn!" Yukari screamed.
"My pay per view!" Akihiko yelled.
"My transactions!" Mitsuru thrashed around her room.
However, Minato was smiling, because he had been enlightened. Someone had sent him a friend request on myspace! It was unheard of! He couldn't wait to see who it was. It could be a dog for all he cared, he was just so happy. He excitedly dragged the cursor over to check who it was.
He clicked and it started to load, and it loaded, and loaded and loaded, making the blue haired fool sweat profusely.
It kept loading, until...
'Service unavailable,' accompanied by a yellow exclamation mark on the bottom of his screen.
...
"Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!"
And so, internet-less days were ushered in by the savior, Ekoda.
Raidou AN: Aaand the cameraman got a raise. Review y'all.
Nights AN : We're back with another chapter. Sorry this took a while but for some reason, we're kinda pumped to write the fuuka arc. Oh and if anyone reading is a wrestling fan, plz plz let us know because I think you'll enjoy the arc if you liked wrestling. And like always, do review. Later.