Tobias' POV
The Next Day
"Beatrice, is that you?" a familiar voice asks as he comes into view. "Who is that with you?" he asks, looking at me as he turns white as a ghost. "Tobias? How? When?" he says flabbergasted.
"For the record, Caleb, it is me and you are a coward." Tris tells him bitterly. "My name is Tris and I don't trust you. You've betrayed me twice and I don't know if I can forgive you yet, but we need your help." she seethes and I chuckle to myself softly.
She was never one to beat around the bush; always so direct in what she wanted. I see that hasn't changed and it gives me hope that "my" Tris still in there. We spend several minutes explaining my "death", how she took the memory serum, and why we have to try to help her remember.
Caleb nods and sucks in a breath as he tells us that a reversal to the memory serum was developed. It can take several months for memory to return and it's experimental, meaning they do not know exactly how it works and how effective it is but he will help us get what we need.
He adds that they don't know how it works on Divergents yet though we are all still willing to try. There is also a simulation serum that can used to induce sims that are actually memories we can use too. The memories aren't always good or happy ones so we need to be prepared.
Caleb gives me a syringe of memory simulation serum and brush Tris' hair away as she nods at me to inject it. I stick it into her neck and push the plunger down just like we did years ago during her initiation. "Be brave, Tris." I whisper, kissing her forehead.
Caleb told me how to watch the sims so I am seeing what she is seeing and wish I could look away. Al, Peter, and Drew attack her, a hand over her mouth and a blindfold covering her eyes. She screams both in the sim and out loud as she is pressed against the railing for the chasm.
I watch as I see myself beat Drew to a pulp then gently carry her over the railing and to my apartment. It's different seeing this and remembering everything that happened when she does not. I watch because I can't tear myself away from the screen.
Next, I see myself showing her my tattoo and her running her fingers over it. The simulation ends with us kissing in my apartment and then there is nothing, total darkness as Tris opens her eyes and I feel them staring into me.
"I'm sorry you had to relive that, but it was important for you to see. That's when our relationship started and I knew that I was beginning to fall for you." I tell her. "You saved me." she replies. "I did, Because that's what you and I do. We protect each other." I answer softly.
Caleb gives me more of the memory simulation serum and the reversal to the memory serum Tris should take daily. The doses should increase slowly with this week being one vial of the reversal serum a day and as many of the simulations that Tris can tolerate.
"Thank you for staying with me, Tobias." Tris whispers softly to me as we walk home. "You're welcome, Tris, but you don't need to thank me. I love you." I reply. We return home and I see Tris reading the notebook, deeply engrossed in whatever she is reading.
"Hey beautiful, where are you at with the book?" I ask gently, not wanting to pry but unable to dismiss my curiosity. "The part where you threw knives at me. You didn't like that much, did you?" she questions, raising an eyebrow.
"No, I didn't but Eric made me do it. You thought that I was taunting you the whole time and accused me of being sadistic like him." I laugh, reliving the memory with her. I get up to shower before bed while she continues reading.
Tris has a solemn look when I return. She is fighting back tears as she tells me that she is at the part where her mom came to see her on Visiting Day. "I don't remember her much, but I wish I did some because I think we were close." she trembles and I resist the urge to pull her close.
"I only met her once, but your parents both died in the war. They chose to sacrifice themselves for you and Caleb. They loved you and I always will too." I tell her, wiping away her tears with my thumb and kissing her cheek.
"Tris, would it be okay if I held you for awhile?" I ask and she nods. I gather her in my arms as the tears flow from her eyes. We are both broken in more ways than one, but together we are whole again.
I don't know how long it will take for us to mend or how soon she'll get back to bring herself, but I don't care. We are together now and that is all that matters. I feel her go limp in my arms and carry her to bed bridal style.
I climb in next to her and hold her against me as I drift off to sleep as well. We wake the next morning and while I cook breakfast, I see that she has resumed reading. While I set the table, Tris tells me that she just read the part where she went through her first simulation and I walked her back to the dormitory.
After breakfast, she takes the memory reversal serum and agrees to try another memory simulation. I ask her if it's okay to make sure she's ready though I won't be able to watch this time or pull her out of it, so I make sure she knows this and move some stray hairs away from her neck as I inject her.
"Be brave, Tris." I whisper before her eyes close and she goes off into a memory of the past. I hate not being able to help her through it, but I know if has to be done too.