Sam's eyes widened at the sound of knocking behind her and she turned her head slightly. Freddie stood framed in window, peering out onto the fire escape.
"Hey," he said carefully. "Do you mind?"
"I told you not to follow me," Sam replied, turning back to look across the dark city. Freddie shrugged.
"Like you do what people tell you," he muttered, climbing through the window. He walked slowly over to the chair Sam was slumped in and put a gentle hand on her shoulder.
"Look, Sam..."
"I said it in the letter, Benson," she said coldly, pushing his hand away. "Let me go. Forget me." He crossed his arms and sat down on the steps behind her, watching her silently. Eventually she turned around and glared at him.
"What are you doing?" she snapped. He raised an eyebrow.
"I could ask you the same thing," he replied. "Running away from all your friends? You're being kinda selfish." Sam rolled her eyes.
"You guys don't need me. You hate me and Carly's in love with you, you've got a great thing going on. And I..." She faltered. "I don't wanna mess it up." She looked away quickly before he could see the expression on her face. He sighed and rolled his eyes.
"I don't hate you," he said softly. "I was angry, I overreacted-"
"You should hate me!" she growled, angrily wiping her eyes. "Everything I've done to you-"
"Is in the past," he said firmly. "We all do things we regret. I'm hardly a saint." Sam leapt up and in an instant she had grabbed his shoulders, pressing her face close to his.
"What's wrong with you?" she asked desperately. "One minute you're slamming a door in my face, and now you're pretending it's all fine! It's not all fine, Freddie!" She choked out a sob and turned away again, moving back toward the window. Freddie sighed.
"You said you loved me," he said quietly. She stopped and glanced back at him.
"What?"
"On your letter. 'I love you. Sam.'" She looked away again and hung her head.
"...yeah."
"Do you?"
"...I think so."
"Ah."
"Yeah." Freddie leant back on the fire escape and sighed again.
"Can I go now?" Sam asked slowly. Freddie ran a hand through his hair and shrugged.
"Why?" he asked eventually.
"Because this isn't going anywhere."
"No, I mean... why do you like me?" Sam opened her mouth and shut it again. Freddie watched her silently.
"You're... nice," she muttered. "Most of the guys I know are jerks, but you've always been nice. Even when we fight, you're always happy to make up after." Freddie nodded slowly.
"Look, Sam-"
"But that doesn't matter," she continued, ignoring him. "This is more than a fight, this is... I assaulted you, I-"
"Sam."
"I can't make it up to you this time, and I-"
"Sam!" She stopped and looked back up at him. Without her noticing, he had moved from the steps to sit next to her on the windowsill. His arm slipped around her shoulders and she allowed herself to lean into him slightly.
"I'm not going to pretend it's ok. What you've done to me goes way over the line, and I'd be justified in never wanting to talk to you again. You've hurt me physically and emotionally for four years straight. But I've stuck with it, because you're Carly's friend and she's mine."
"Exactly!" Sam moaned. "So I-"
"Don't interrupt me," Freddie said softly. Sam's eyes widened and she shut up instantly.
"When you came into my room, that was too much, and I snapped. I said things I regret. And I'm sorry for that."
"You don't have to be sorry for-"
"Shh." Sam closed her mouth again.
"So the next day you came back, and I slammed the door in your face. I was still angry, and I didn't even let you try to explain yourself - what was going on at home, why you felt that hurting me was the right thing to do. And again, I'm sorry for that."
"Why-" Sam started, before cutting herself off and looking sheepishly at her feet.
"Carly tried to convince me to make things up with you, but as I said, I was still angry and I refused. Even after her 'please, for me' bit, I said no, because I knew that I was in the right and I didn't want to pretend I wasn't, even for her. But after I'd had time to calm down, I realised that I should make up with you. I wanted to. I missed hanging out with you. That's why I spent last night out in Seattle looking for you. It wasn't just to please Carly, it was because I wanted to find you. To be honest..." He paused and took a deep breath. "Me and Carly have been getting close, and that's been my dream since the first day I met her. But I would break up with her in an instant if that's what it takes to keep you in our lives. Your friendship is more important than me having a relationship with Carly."
Sam's eyes widened and she looked up at Freddie, her mouth slightly open.
"Are you serious?" she asked. He nodded slowly.
"There's always other guys, but you're a one-of-a-kind friend. I can't let you just walk out of her life because of me." She shook her head in disbelief and leant back against his shoulder, looking back out at the cityscape. Flecks of light had become visible behind the buildings as the sun began to rise, and her face was illuminated in a dull orange.
"I don't deserve to know you," she murmured, almost too quietly for him to hear. "You're just too nice." Freddie smiled and rubbed her shoulder.
"So are you, when you want to be," he replied with a slight laugh. "There's a reason we shared our first kiss." Sam's face fell.
"It wouldn't have mattered if I hadn't been trying to one-up you," she muttered.
"I'm glad you did," Freddie said. "I think we both needed to get it out of the way." Sam nodded slightly and let out a sigh.
"I guess," she replied. Freddie smiled again.
"Sam, just tell me you'll stay," he said. "We both know that you leaving Seattle isn't going to help anything. Do you even have a plan?"
"I..." she began. "Not really."
"Come inside, Sam," he said. "I can feel you shivering. You can stay at my place, get some sleep."
"Won't your mom freak?"
"I'll talk to her," he assured her. "Come on. You need some rest."