I'm a slacker! Gah, my sincere apologies, I didn't mean to be so late with this chapter. Once again, very emotional, please bare with the pathetic-ness. All part of Reno's personal transformation, people!

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Square

I trudged through the filthy streets of Midgar, avoiding the people in the mass crowd around me, who, upon seeing my blue suit, did likewise. Perhaps I should have looked a little more proud, a bit more dignified and confident, but at he moment, I didn't care. I had my head hung low, hands stuffed in my pockets, and my eyes locked on the cement in front of me. Just like always, questions echoed in my mind, a broken record of inquiries that never seemed to end.

Two days since Rude had more or less rescued me from the lab. Our jobs were at stake, and perhaps even my life. I had pretty much gone into hiding, staying at Elena's home one night, Rude's another, anything to avoid Tseng contacting me. I had not gone to work since the incident with my fellow Turks, mainly because I wasn't up to dealing with Rufus right now. Knowing him, he'd either send me back to the lab or order my friends to 'get rid of me'. I guess I was being a coward, but I'd rather have my life than my job right now.

Or maybe I don't want either.

I had used the last of the previous month's paycheque to buy the strongest alcohol I could find. Halfway through the first bottle, Rude found me. I had been hit with guilt like a brick wall, but I wasn't going to back down. We began a screaming match that reminded me of my adolescence, some hurtful words were exchanged from both parties. I could see the pain in Rude's eyes, and if I had been perfectly sober, I wouldn't have broken down. My knees had given out from under me, and I more or less collapsed onto the floor.

There was a moment of silence, save my painful sobs, before he picked me up off the floor gently. He knew I didn't want to be there. I didn't want to be in hiding, I didn't want to be in Midgar. Perhaps he even knew that I didn't want to be alive.

I shook the memory out of my head as I walked through the slums, wishing I had drank enough that night that I couldn't remember. I had to clear my head, while staying sober.

I stopped at what would be the border between Sector 6 and Sector 7. I stared at the massive, collapsed plate in front of me. It was a wreck, to say the least. Scrap metal, wood, and other junk created a wall of destruction, which had an air of death to it. How many people had died in that planned destruction of the pillar? The pillar that I had set the bomb to? I closed my eyes and sighed. So much death, so much blood. It was all on my hands. I felt, for the first time, intense guilt for dropping that plate. Turning away from the aftermath of the destruction, I quickly walked away.

How many people had I taken away from the world? Husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, brothers, daughters? I gave a groan and brought a hand up to grip my crimson hair, tugging on it.

How many children?

"Ah… fuck." I whimpered, stepping through the playground, which was in ruins. I stopped at the large dome-shaped slide, the image of a cartoon animal molded from it. A metal beam was stuck through the top of it, impaling it right through. It seemed as if it was a sick mockery of the young lives I had destroyed. I stopped beside it and looked it over, biting my lip. I saw some graffiti along the side of it. Some names, some street slang, and a small heart with two initials within it. I shook my head violently and was about to walk away, but I stopped. What was that sound? Crying? I looked around briefly before seeing a large gaping hole in the side of the dome slide. I walked around to it and lowered myself so I could peer in. I saw a small figure curled up in the back of the dome, shuddering with sobs. My heart wrenched at the sight.

"Hey… kid." I said softly, watching the child lift her head. Her wet, bright blue eyes shone in the light spilling into the dome from the hole. The girl couldn't be more than five. She looked at me before her face overflowed with fear. She squeezed back against the plastic dome wall as far as she could, emitting a fearful squeak as she did. I sighed a little. "I'm not gonna hurt you." I attempted to reassure her. She just folded her arms over her knees and buried her face in them.

"Go away!" she whimpered, voice cracked. My guess was she recognised the blue suit.

"I'm not here to hurt you or anything." I repeated softly, feeling a sting in my heart when she lifted her head, large, sad eyes narrowing a little.

"No! You're a bad man!" she said accusingly, forcing herself against the wall even more. I could see the fear and hatred in her eyes. She was so young, and so angry. "You killed my daddy!"

For a moment, I forgot how to breathe, and my heart ceased to beat. I was silent for a long time before I sat just outside the entrance to the plastic cave.

"What was your dad's name?" I asked as gently as I could with such a heavy lump in my throat. I peered into the dome.

"J-James…" she stuttered. I could see her trembling. "…Naroll."

The internal reaction I had a minute earlier was nothing compared to this. I felt a physical pain inside my chest, and my eyes were stinging with hot moisture. I leaned against the plastic dome, trying to collect myself. I heard more sobbing inside.

"I'm sorry…" I said quietly, sparking more sobs. "But I had to." I didn't know why I was justifying myself to a child, or even justifying myself period. I was guilty, and I knew it all too well.

"My daddy was a hero." The girl's voice was full of hatred, but tinted with pride. "He was trying to save us from a bad man. Badder than you."

"I know." I choked. The sight of the man's blood splattered on the white walls came back to me, and I felt tears spill down my face. "He didn't deserve what happened to him." In my eyes, James Naroll had gone from a pitiful angry citizen to a noble hero in a matter of seconds. Part of me wished he could have taken out Rufus, and saved the world so much trouble. I suddenly found a new respect for Avalanche. "Your dad was a hero…"

There was light shuffling before the girl's head poked out from the entrance. She looked sceptical of my words. I sighed and turned so my back was against the slide, trying to be subtle in wiping my tears away with my sleeve.

"Mister Turk?" Such an innocent girl… how would I ever live with myself knowing I had taken away her father? I always knew our victims had families, but never seen them. Perhaps seeing for myself, the lives I had broken, it hits with so much force.

"You should get home, kid." I said quietly. "The streets around here aren't safe, and being seen with me wont do you much good, anyway." I looked at her, and she blinked at me, our eyes still full of tears. The child stood after crawling out of the dome. She then stepped back a bit, almost afraid to turn her back on me. I hung my head, eyes on the ground. "Don't worry, I'm done with being the bad guy."

I heard the light footsteps of her running off, and I sat there in silence for a good five minutes. What kind of monster was I? So much blood on my hands, so many lives I had broken…

"Maybe I deserve this." I mumbled, looking at the back of my hand. The usual blue and purple lines of veins were darker with my discoloured black blood. Karma was a swift, harsh thing, after all. I was snapped out of my train of thought when my cell phone started ringing. I blinked several times and took it out of my pocket. I cleared my throat before answering it. Holding it up to my ear, I barely managed the word "Hello."

"Reno!" Tseng's voice was urgent, almost panicked. That was certainly out of the ordinary, the Turk leader was usually so composed and calm. However, I felt anger swell in me.

"What the hell do you want?" I snapped, feeling the rage and betrayal that I felt two days ago. He had some nerve calling me. I didn't care if he was my boss, or my friend. He let Hojo turn me into… this.

"Reno, you have to listen to me." He said, seemingly unaffected by my harsh reply. "You need to drop this cell phone and get out of there. Rufus is tracking you."

I sat there in shock for a moment before managing to get myself to stand. On shaky legs, I looked around in a paranoid manner, breathing getting heavier with panic. "What do you mean, he's tracking me?"

"Reno, just go! Drop the phone in a sewer and run!"

I barely heard his words as several ShinRa Soldiers ambushed me. They seemingly came out of nowhere, one big blur that melted in with my dizzy surroundings. They leaped at me and took me down, my cell phone flying out of my hand and shattering into pieces against the ground. I screamed as they pinned me on my stomach and gave a couple of my attackers nasty shocks with my implanted lightning materia. They managed to hold me down long enough to push a needle into my shoulder. As the foreign liquid was pumped into my body, I panicked. I cast an fire attack on the injection-wielder and got him to retract the needle, but not before it was all in me. I felt weak all over, and I tried to cast another attack, but somehow I couldn't. I forced myself to flip onto my back and I sent the last soldier flying off of me with a violent kick in the ribs. As I tried to scramble away, exhaustion hit me suddenly, and I collapsed on the ground.

God fucking damn it.

Yes, I know, I'm a monster! I hope you liked it anyways. I'll try to update sooner next time, I feel so bad for slacking. Lots of drama in the personal life, but I'm working on fixing that.

Reviews! You people are too good to me!

Nando the RPS King: Ohh, don't you worry, the deserving people will get thier share of bad Karma -evil laugh- -cough- eer... thanks for the review, you're always so kind. Although there wasn't too much going on in this chapter, I hope you liked it anyways. Thanks again.

Lucifiel: I know, I'm horrible to Reno Y.Y I feel awful. But I hope it makes for a good story anyways. Thanks for the review!

DeafLizgon: -takes Hojo Voodoo Doll- RAWR! -stabs, rips, burns and stomps doll- DIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIEDIE! -deep breath- ok, I'm good... calm... whooo... anyways, yes, much shock even for me when it came to Elena freaking out on Tseng. XD Thanks for the review!

Delta VT: Yeah, it's kind of a given that Tseng would know. And Yes for Elena fighting back! I love her so X3 Thanks for the review!

TruebornChaos: Emotional parts come plentiful in this fanfiction! Bah, so emo! But I love writing this, and knowing that you like it makes it so much more wirth it! Thanks for the review!

Thymine: Not much consequences this chapter, but the next one is gonna be interesting, I can promise that! Yeah... poor Reno, I'm so cruel! Hehe, thanks for the review!

Manders1953: Inhumane, cruel, monsterous, awful, use whatever term you like ;) Rufus is evil, but we lurve him anyways! -huggles Rufus and gets shot- X.x thanks for the review!

Dav J: Aww, not Tseng and Rufus! Y.Y I love them! But yeah... it's not like they don't deserve it. But evilness is part of what makes them so smexy XD But...that's just me. And please NOT TEH JELLYFISH! I'm so scared of fish, they're so scary and freaky -curls up int he corner- I'll be a good writer and update... XD anywhoo, thanks!

Delusion48: Wow! Once again,you are too kind! And I try to update as often as I can, and I hope you still like it. Your reviews are so encouraging, and I love them! Thank you so much!

Orphen27: Aww, thank you for another nice review. I'm glad you're liking this story so much!

Flying Bronco: Well, I wish a very Happy (Belated) Birthday to you! Consider those many chapters a birthday presant! Hope you continue to enjoy this story! Thank you!

WrexSoul: Another kind review! Wow, I love you! I'm glad you're enjoying this fanfic so much, you keep spilling the compliments, I feel so special. And don't be too worried (why am I saying this after the end of THIS chapter? XD) Tseng seems to redeem himself in a way this time, but he's still a bad, BAD Turk! X3 I don't even know if the Turks will ever be the same... I'm so evil. Well, thanks for another nice review!