A/N: Like I said before, its a little violent, and graphic.
Rachael's P.O.V.
Our night was nearly over, it was about 9:30 and we were right next to the hotel. Maureen gave Robert a hug goodbye and so did I. I saw a shadow staring at them from farther down the boardwalk, but gave it no attention. We made it back to our floor and parted ways, when I arrived in the hotel I checked in on the kids who were sleeping. Then looked about for Paul, he was nowhere to be found. He must've been out to get something, I thought. I settled in on the couch and gazed out the window for a while. That was until Paul came tearing into the hotel, darting about like a madman. He completely passed by me at first, because I was sitting in the dark on one of the couches. He would not have known I was there had he not heard me slightly shift positions. He turned and headed straight toward me.
"Get up!" he roared when he reached me. Paul seized both of my wrists yanking me up into a standing position. "
"What the fuck are you doing to me?" he whispered raucously, shaking me.
He dragged me roughly by the arm into the bedroom, switching on the light while bolting the door behind us. Paul grabbed me by the shoulders slamming me up against the door, his body melding into mine. He was pressing so hard against me I could scarcely inhale.
"Paul knock it off, what's going on?"
"Shut your mouth, Rachael." He held my wrists behind my back with one hand, and then forced my thighs apart with his knee, while his other hand slid quickly up under my dress in between my thighs. His fingers ripped away my panties. He roughly slid his fingers inside of me while his thumb was massaging in slow firm circles.
"You let him do this to you?" he nearly shouted.
"No! Who?" I protested. His fingers continued working on my lower half, so precisely and unhurriedly.
"Does he make you feel like this? Does he?" he snarled.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"I saw you with him, Rachael, don't play dumb." He was still forcing his fingers inside of me, it dawned on me- Paul must have seen me with Robert. I pulled away, he came after me and grabbed my wrist,
"Paul it's not what you think." He furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms,
"You're fucking lying and cheating on me." Paul shouted.
"No I'm not, ask Maureen. He's just a friend." He rolled his eyes, and stomped out of the room,
"I'm going out, don't wait up." I broke down instantly, How could Paul think I was cheating? All I had done was gone out for drinks with a friend. It probably wasn't the smartest idea lying to him about my whereabouts, but who was he to control me? It wasn't as if we were married. I stayed in the room until I saw Maureen peek her head in.
"Rach, what happened?" I told her, she looked concerned,
"Ritch went after him, he'll get him back. Are you okay?" I nodded,
"I'll be fine, Mo. Thanks" She left back to her room. I waited a few hours in the bedroom. Alone. It was 12:00 when I finally heard the front door open.
I walked out to find discouraged, slightly frustrated Ringo with Paul's arm slung over his shoulder, trying to keep him upright.
"Don't get tangled up with any birds, Ritch, they drive you loony," Paul slurred. "Just screw 'em and leave. Don't let them get inside your head. If you do, you're fucked."
Richard saw me standing across the room and said, "Paul, that's enough, son."
"No, no, I'm serious, chap," he garbled. "They mess about with your head…" Richard covered Paul's mouth with his hand, and deposited him on the couch.
"Let him talk, Ritch," I said. "He apparently has something to say."
"Oh, there it is, fucking rag." Paul taunted at me.
"'s okay, Ritchie. You can go back to Mo, I can deal with this prick tease witch," Paul said, pointing his finger at me and narrowing his eyes in my direction.
"That's not who I'm worried about." Ritchie said looking at me.
"Go ahead, Richard, I'll be fine." He exited the room quickly. Paul was sitting on the couch holding his head in his hands, he moaned,
"My head." I walked over to the kitchen and got out a cup with some water, I pulled out some Motrin from my purse as well and handed them to Paul. He swallowed the pills while downing the water,
"Rachael," He whimpered, "How could you do this to me, love?" I didn't know how to feel, He looked up at me his eyes were full of tears,
"Paul, I wasn't with him." I explained who Robert was and apologized for not telling him earlier. He was upset, he reached out for me, I didn't let him touch me,
"Where did you go?" He was distressed that I wasn't letting him near me,
"I was mad. So I went out and got drunk. I wasn't thinking straight Rachael, I couldn't stand the thought that you could be with someone else. I'm so sorry." Paul stood up and pulled me into a hug, He kept mumbling "I'm sorry" into my neck,
"Paul, stop apologizing. We both meant what we did."
"Rachael, I love you." He said running his hands up and down my back,
"Do you forgive me?" I thought about it for a moment,
"I don't know." Paul pulled me to the bedroom.
Paul's P.O.V.
Paul laid her on the bed and got on top of her ripping her dress off while he took off his pants, exposing his hard on. He opened her legs, slowly got inside, making sure she was comfortable while slamming in and out of her. He didn't care that he was going so fast, he needed to be inside of her; he needed to make her his own. Rachael quickly came, but Paul hadn't come yet, so he started thrusting into her harder and harder until he almost screamed out with pleasure and moaned her name loudly. His knees buckled, finally giving out from weakness. He collapsed on top of her kissing his way up her body to her soft, warm breasts. Paul stayed there for a while before continuing up her neck on onto her lips.
"So beautiful" Paul sighed, he couldn't believe he almost had lost her, he surely wasn't going to let that happen again then fell into a peaceful sleep.
Rachael's P.O.V.
I awoke to Paul fondling with my left breast. My heart suddenly stopped, and my throat went tight,
"Paul… I forgot to take the pill." He froze and flipped me over to face him,
"What did you just say?" his face was pale,
"We… oh shit." I got up as carefully and sped over to the bathroom. Paul was hot on my tail; he came in behind me and closed the door. I dumped out the contents of my makeup bag shakily searching around for the package. I held it up with trembling fingers; sure enough the pill that was meant for use today and yesterday were there unopened. I sunk down to the floor, staring at the small package. Paul slunk down behind me and held me tight,
"It'll be fine." He tried persuading me. I barely heard him, all I could see was the package and unopened pill slot. Everything around me blurred. What if I was pregnant? Christ, I already had 3 kids to take care of, I wasn't married, and I was in a foreign country.
"This is not my week." I mumbled. I sat there on the cold tile of the bathroom floor with Paul rocking me. A lone tear escaped down my cheek.
Paul's P.O.V.
He couldn't think straight, how could he have been so fucking stupid? He should've used protection. A thought suddenly popped into his head,
"Rach you took the pill for the past couple of days until today, right?" She shook her head and looked at him,
"I forgot the last two days."
"Medication stays in your body for a long time, so we probably have nothing to worry about, honey." She looked at him entirely unconvinced; he had to admit it was pretty dim-wittedrationale. She leaned back into his side and he continued rocking her, another possible baby? How were they going to deal with that? It wasn't that he didn't want another child- hell, he wanted an entire household bursting of little brats with Rachael. It was just that they had just gotten on semi-decent terms, this would change everything.
"I want to go home." She mumbled,
"Rach, don't go." She got up and walked out of the bathroom leaving him on the floor.
Rachael's P.O.V.
I threw all my things into the suitcase, I pulled on an outfit then went back to the bathroom hastily throwing all my items back into my makeup bag. Paul was still in the bathroom,
"You're seriously leaving?" I didn't even answer him. The anger was beginning to rise within me. Mostly at Paul, partially at myself. I walked over to the kids room stuffing all of their things into the three tiny suitcases. I dragged them to the front door, and picked up a phone. I dialed the airport and made sure there would be 4 tickets waiting for us when we arrived. Paul came barreling out of the room,
"Don't go. Or at least let me get my stuff, I'll come with you." I turned towards him,
"Fuck off, McCartney." I spat. "You've caused nothing but trouble since you've been around." I walked back into the room and woke up a drowsy Lily and William,
"Guys wake up, we have to go." They stumbled out of bed balancing each other, I took Holly out of the crib and walked back out into the front room.
"Where we going?" Will asked.
"Home, honey. Get your suitcases they're in the front room." I went back over to the room and called for a bell hop. Within minutes he was there with a luggage cart and loaded it up to take it down to the car. Right before I was about to go Paul reappeared, Lily caught sight of him and wiggled out of the hold I had on her hand,
"Daddy." She said reaching for him, Paul scooped her up. I was furious.
"James Paul McCartney. Put her down right now. She's coming with me." I said through gritted teeth. Paul furrowed his eyebrows,
"She's half mine Rachael. You can't take her." I gave him a warning glance and he didn't back down,
"Paul. Put. Her. Down."
"No," He said, "Come 'ead love, we can talk-" I interrupted
"No Paul. No more talking. Let her down, if you're lucky I'll let you see her again in your next lifetime."
"Lillian come here right now, sweetheart." I said reaching out a hand for her. I couldn't help but feel like a complete asshole, she started crying. The poor kid had just become attached to her father, and now she was being ripped away from him. She wiggled down reluctantly letting go of Paul while running over to William. I took Williams hand while he kept one arm wrapped around Lily. Holly was still asleep in my arms as we walked out of the room. Paul watched us trying to reach us
"Rachael." He screamed but I continued to walk faster. We got to the lobby and over to the waiting car. Lily wouldn't stop howling, she upset both William and Holly. Thankfully the small airport and flight was empty. The plane ride home was horrendous, as soon as I got one child calmed down the next one started up again. We touched down in London and were dropped off at my apartment.
Lily and William hadn't stopped bawling since we had left Greece. I put Holly in her crib and tried talking to the two older kids. They wouldn't have any of it. I figured they would be done and tucker themselves out soon enough, I took all of our luggage and put it away. When I returned to the living room they had their faces buried in the couch cushion sound asleep. I was about to move them, but thought better of it, I didn't want them to wake up and start the shrieking all over again. I sat down on my own bed holding my stomach, I felt extremely sick. What had my life turned into? A week ago I had a near perfect life but now Paul had come and wrecked it and to think, I might be pregnant again with his child. This was my own personal hell.
::::::::::::::
I awoke to the phone ringing,
"Hello?"
"Rac-" I hung up instantly it was Paul's voice. Not five minutes later it rang again. I picked it up and slammed it down, he tried 6 more times I finally picked up,
"Stop calling."I said calmly,
"Rachael, wait just listen. I'm back in London, we need to talk."
"What part of 'fuck off', and 'leave me alone' do you not understand?" He was silent for a moment,
"You don't mean that."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't." He was such an idiot, did he really think that I was going to stay on the phone and argue with him?
"Leave. Me. Alone."
"Are the kids are okay?"
"They're fine, no thanks to you."
"Rachael you didn't have to leave, that was your choice. I want to see Lillian."
"No. Goodbye." I hung up the phone and pulled the plug from the wall and went back to sleep.
I woke up again William and Lily had snuck into my bed and were looking up at me with pouts on their faces,
"Why did we have to leave mummy?" I sighed, how was I going to explain this one?
"Doll, sometimes mommies and daddies fight, and they have to leave each other."
"Could we go back now?" I shook my head,
"Sorry, I'm afraid not."
"Why not mum?" William piped up. It took me a minute to realize what he had just called me, mum.
"Babe, you don't have to call me that if you don't want to." He smiled a little bit,
"I want to, 'cuz you're my mummy here, and my other one is in heaven." I nodded and stroked his cheek. After a while they had given up begging and fell back asleep on my bed, I got ready for the day, and took care of Holly. I heard knocking at the door when I answered I instantly knew it was Paul. We stood there staring at each other, he was still dressed in the same outfit as the night before. His eye's were bloodshot and he looked like a complete wreck. I finally snapped out of it,
"Well?" He looked just about ready to cry. I wasn't having it,
"Don't cry, because I don't feel sorry for you. Make it quick, what do you want?"
"You." He mumbled I slammed the door, but he stuck his foot in and pushed his way inside.
"Paul, knock it off and get out, I swear to god if you make the kids upset I'll have you thrown out of here." Tears were rolling down his cheeks,
"I was stupid, please love I'm begging you, give me a chance to explain." I opened the door, and heard pitter-patter footsteps coming from the hallway. Will and Lily came sprinting at Paul.
"Daddy." Lil shrieked. Both her and William threw themselves at Paul's legs. He bent over and picked them up giving them kisses. I was completely pissed off, he really needed to leave. I let them greet each other but I had finally reached my breaking point.
"You're going to stay here right?" She asked. Paul looked up at me and I gave him nothing,
"Actually love, I don't think I can. I have to go soon" She looked stricken,
"Daddy you promised you wouldn't leave again." I shut my eyes, and leaned back against the wall. Paul got down to their level and tried explaining things to them but it was no use, Lillian latched onto him,
"You promised." He whispered something into her ear, and stood up. He walked over to me,
"Why doesn't she come stay with me for the day, I'll try explaining it to her." I gave up,
"You have until noon. I'm picking her up, don't expect this to happen anymore. This is it." Paul turned back to Lily,
"Would you like to come over to daddy's house love?" She smiled and grabbed Williams' hand,
"He's coming too." I had totally forgotten, everything the two children did, they did together, they wouldn't spend a moment apart. Paul looked up at me, and I nodded. He took them to their room to get ready, I busied myself with Holly, when they returned they were set to go,
"Mummy aren't you coming?" William asked, I shook my head,
"No. I'm going to stay here with Holly, honey." Lillian got irritated,
"Mum come with us." I shook my head,
"I'm coming to pick you up later." She started sniffling; Paul looked at me, tilting his head to the side,
Paul's P.O.V.
If someone would have told him he would nearly have a family a month ago he would have called them crazy, he had one at the moment and was on the verge of losing it he thought was he going to go crazy. As soon as Rachael had left he got on the next flight and made it home, the entire time he went nutty, he had convinced himself they had been in an accident and when she hadn't answered his calls he lost it. Now she wouldn't even look at him, this was insane. This annoying, defiant, stubborn, argumentative bird had him going mad, what in the world could he possibly do to make it up to her? He had been a stupid and drunk, couldn't she understand that he was trying to make this work?
Rachael's P.O.V.
I looked away as Paul dragged them out the door. They were reluctant to go without me, but there wasn't a chance I was going so they gave up fighting and left. I tended to Holly and got down to my own business. I put the baby in the pram and took her down to the corner store.
When I arrived home with my brown paper bag I put Holly on the living room floor and went into my bathroom. I sat down and pulled the box out of the bag, a pregnancy test. I knew it was still early, maybe too early to tell whether or not I was pregnant, but I needed to at least try. I read the instructions following them carefully, I couldn't afford a slip-up. I was quivering and pacing around as I waited for the results, 5 minutes felt like an eternity. The time had finally come, I walked with trepidation to the bathroom and picked up the tester.
It was an almost clear positive. My ears rang out and I ceased to continue a reaction. Numbness overtook me as I slumped down against the tub unsure of how to feel. Someone walked into the bathroom,
"Rach?" Paul poked his head in and spotted me on the floor. A similar scene unfolded, he came and wrapped himself around me taking a look at the stick. He kissed my forehead. I could feel him shake, I wasn't much better.
"You didn't come, and I got worried. It's nearly seven."
"Holly" I mumbled trying to get up, Paul kept me in his embrace,
"She's all right. I put her in her cot. She was sleeping."
"Sorry." I muttered, Paul kissed me on the temple,
"There's nothing for you to be apologetic about, we're going to be okay." He picked me up and put me on the bed wrapping the covers around me. I stared blankly into space.
Paul's P.O.V.
He had already fed the kids dinner, they were playing with toys in front of the telly,
"Bedtime." He called, they went to their room and got ready, Paul tucked them in,
"Daddy are you staying?" He nodded and kissed them both. He locked up the flat and turned off the T.V. then returned to Rachael's bedroom. When he walked in she was in the same position he had left her in.
Rachael's P.O.V.
My mouth was dry, and my eyes glazed over. I couldn't blink, or swallow, let alone be aware of anything.
"Love," He said kissing the top of my head, when had he gotten here? My thoughts weren't processing correctly.
"Baby." Was all I could say.
"It'll be okay." Paul told me. I continued staring like an dense fool. Paul stayed up with me throughout the night, when the sun rose I was still unmoved. Paul got out of bed wordlessly to tend to the kids. He returned,
"I dropped them off with Buddy's wife. She's going to watch them for the day." I didn't answer,
"Rach, do you need anything?" His words ran past my ear, but I couldn't respond. We spent the afternoon sitting there, Paul got up a few times to check on things but I stayed put.
"Sweetheart, you need to move a little bit. I haven't seen you shift an inch since last night." I was locked in place. He got up and sat in front of me tucking the hair out of my eyes behind my ear. He tilted my chin up,
"Look at me." My mind was fuzzy I couldn't see him, he snapped his fingers, "Darling, focus." I finally glanced up,
"There's my girl." He got out of bed and came back with a plate of toast and a glass of water. "Bite." He instructed holding up a piece, I turned my face away, he held up the cup, "Water?" I took a sip and swallowed. "There we go, that's good." He coached.
"I've made a doctor's appointment for you. In about an hour." He got off the bed and went over to my closet, he pulled out a dress and walked back over. He stood me up and helped me out of my robe and into the outfit. He zipped it up and took me over to the bathroom. He put down the seat of the toilet putting me down while grabbing a brush. He combed out my hair, and styled it to the best of his ability. He left and came back with sunglasses sliding them on my face.
"Here." He took my hand and we left the building. He put me in the passenger seat of his car. I rested my head against the window, he grabbed my hand stroking it while navigating through traffic. We pulled up to the office, Paul came around my side and helped me out. We got into the office and Paul parked me on a bench, prior to signing us in. Soon enough a doctor came out with a huge beam,
"Mr. and Mrs. Manning, I'm so glad to see you." He guided us to his office, he sat me down and ran a few tests.
"I'll be back in a moment." The doctor left the room, when he returned he was flipping through papers.
"I've got some very exciting news!" Paul's grip tightened,
"It's exceedingly early on, and still a bit too soon to tell exactly but I'm nearly sure you are expecting. We'll need to have you come back in a week or so just to confirm it, but congratulations!" He clapped Paul and the back and shook his hand, he gave me a wave before exiting. Paul and I went back to the car. I continued in my trace,
"Well at least we have an idea of what is going on, darling." He reasoned. We went back to the apartment, a few reporters were waiting outside, they had somehow gotten wind that he was back in town,
"Paul where is the child?" One called out. He ignored them and we went up to the flat. I sat in a chair looking out the window to the ground below. 'Great' was my first clear thought, 'now they're going to mob again.' Paul must've thought the same thing.
"Why don't we stay over at my house tonight, the gates and stuff…" He mumbled. I showed no indifference, He came back with a bag for me and another one for the children. We left down the service entrance and stopped along the way to pick up the children. They got into the car and chattered with Paul about their day. Holly was seated in my lap. When we arrived at the house the children dragged the bags in. Paul took Holly from me to get her inside, he returned and picked me up. He carried me up the staircase and put me in bed. I fell asleep devoid of emotion.
Paul's P.O.V.
The kids ran around the house while he made sandwiches for dinner. After they had eaten and he had taken care of Holly, Lily and William had made a blanket fort in the living room to sleep in. Paul put Holly in the guestroom upstairs so he could hear her at night. The monitor at the gate was ringing nonstop, he turned down the volume, it was the gatebirds. Paul walked outside and plodded over to the gate,
"Listen girls," He said sternly, "I've got a sleeping kid in there, stop ringing the bell." The girls stood there with their arms crossed,
"You've got that whore in there too, dontcha?" One asked popping her gum loudly,
"Go home girls." He turned around and stomped back into the house. He locked the door, and went back into the living room.
Paul's P.O.V.
Once all the children were asleep and accounted for he went back to his own bedroom. He crawled up on the bed to check on Rachael. She was in a fitful sleep. He thought she looked like an angel- her skin was glowing while her dark locks contrasted with the white of the pillow, her eyes were fluttering just a tiny bit she woke up when he pushed the hair out of her eyes,
Rachael's P.O.V.
"How did my girl sleep?" It took me a minute to realize where I was, it came crashing in from all corners of my mind like a tidal wave. I was in Paul's house, in his bedroom. Oh, and the most significant detail, I was almost certainly pregnant. I felt my entire body lock and I started sobbing,
"Please don't cry," He said he got behind me pulling me into him, he held my head against his chest while putting the other protectively around my front with a hand held on my abdomen. "Shush, see we're all fine. The kids are okay, I'm okay, you're okay."
"I'm so sorry." I mumbled countless times through my tears,
"That's enough, there's nothing for you to be sorry about. We got into this together." I couldn't stop though, my whole world came crashing in,
"Baby." I murmured,
"Darling, stop making yourself upset, we have to go next week to the appointment to make sure we really are." I finally trickled down to my last few tears, then I was dried out. He got out of bed and reached for me scooping me up,
"Come with me to the music room, I don't want you to be alone." He took me to the room and stuck me on the couch; he got to the piano quietly working something out. About an hour passed and I heard Holly fussing, Paul glanced up at me as I left the room- he was probably surprised that I had moved on my own. I changed the baby's diaper, and took her with me downstairs to make a bottle. I was slightly amused when I found Lily and Will in the living room, they were huddled together below a blanket fort. I grabbed a bottle from the bag in the hallway then took it to the kitchen to get it ready; after it was warmed up I took a seat on one of the chairs from the kitchen table. Holly took to the bottle and was happily eating while studying me with her large brown doe eyes,
"Hey." Paul whispered, he knelt before me resting his hands on my knees, I looked up in acknowledgement and continued with the baby.
Paul's P.O.V.
He watched Rachael feed Holly, he couldn't help but notice how broken she looked. Her eyes were semi-glazed over, and her lips were pursed, even through that she was taking care of the baby. When Holly had finished eating she stood up and maneuvered her way around him and upstairs.