(note: I just noticed that when I upload a document the symbol I was using isn't recognized. I using a it for breaks in the story. Sorry for the not so smooth segues before.. now I am using a solid line "_____" to distigush it. The --- 3 dashes are still for Lizzies thoughts. Enjoy--)
"I thought there would be more mirrors… there aren't any!"
Dr. Kellie Lee openly laughed at the petite brunette. "Elizabeth, we are taking a pole dancing class, not The Learning Annex's How To Strip 101."
"I know but…"
"Hello Ladies." A southern belle in booty shorts that look like underwear, and a tank top greeted the two General Hospital staffers.
"This is Suzy." Kellie introduced. "And this is Elizabeth, the girl I told you about."
"Gurl prepare for the best workout east of the Mississippi." With a frown she added, "Kellie says you've had some hard times," then a big toothy smile popped out, "Sexy is gonna be OK again! Just you wait and see! We're gonna have so much FUN!"
"KELLIE! What did you tell her?" Elizabeth blushed.
"Nothing the world doesn't already know! Look Liz, I am not saying you are a sex addict like I was- am," to Suzy, "Recovering." Back to liz, "But for a while there sex was managing you, you weren't managing it. This is gonna be one way for you to get your power back, your confidence."
"But I have my power back!" She wanted to pout. "I wouldn't touch Nikolas again with a ten..foot.." suddenly aware of her surroundings and the bad pun. She had to commit, "POLE!"
Lizzie chuckled giving the other gals permission to join in.
Kellie put her arm on Liz's shoulder, "I love you. If anyone gets how someone can use sex to manage the pain in their life, it's me. Trust me. This is not just a workout for you. Some part of you spun out of control and sex was the catalyst. I want you to learn that sex, being sexy, is not a weakness. I know what it's like to be walking around that hospital with everyone whispering. But eff them if they can't take a joke!"
"Yeah. Fuck them!" The teacher interjected in her sweet twang. They looked at her straight-faced. "What?" she shrugged.
____
No matter how many times she watched it performed, there was just something awkward about how she approached the pole. Lizzie wanted to look all perky like the other gals sauntering up to the pole and taking a turn around it to build up momentum. It was no use.
---
I am never gonna get this. I am such a dork. I feel like my limbs are made of plastic.
---
"Come on girl, one more time." Suzy encouraged as she approached the newbie.
Lizzie was sweating like a dog. The first part of the class, stretches and strength exercises, felt amazing. They were tough on her body but she like pushing it, enjoyed feeling strong. But when they started the actual pole work she had problems. The sexy walk around the pole was throwing her. It didn't require strength of muscle, more like strength of character. She started and stalled.
"Where's the bar? Give me a shot of tequila and I can do this!" she laughed at her self. Hollering across the room to Kellie, "I need some Lickit, Slamit, Suckit!"
Kellie laughed and waved her off before going back to work on her own moves.
"So this guy you wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole…" Suzy asked as Lizzie tried again.
"Uh huh?" It was no use; a 5 year old beauty pageant contestant had more poise.
"Are you angry at him?"
"Yea," Lizzy conceded as she stalled again. "So?" She pulled up her sweats to get more skin to grip the pole with.
"Can you use that anger to control your nerves about being sexy? Use it to let him know he's not going to take anything away from you."
Her suggestion was good advice but it didn't strike a cord of truth with Lizzie. Nik wasn't a problem like that anymore. "Maybe..?"
The instructor was almost at a loss. Suddenly she got behind Lizzie, firmly placed her hands on the younger woman's hips and held on.
"Move Girl…" Suzy tried to guide Lizzie's sway. "Loosen up. Close your eyes. I KNOW you have this in you. Ok… feel the beat…" Her fingers tapped a rhythm on Lizzie's pelvis as she pushed her hips into motion.
The Texan kept encouraging Lizzie's hips. Finally Elizabeth closed her eyes and concentrated on the music. She was still stiff but at least moving and feeling a little less self-conscious.
"Now imaging you are alone in a big empty room. No one can see you. Your chest is opening up, your shoulders are loosening…"
And sure enough they were. Lizzie was imagining the box shaped room, dark except for a loan, warm spotlight on a simple pole in the center.
--
It's not so scary. I don't know what I am so afraid of…
---
"…Remember that feeling you get on the swings… not as a kid but as a woman… how it feels to grab the chains and push your body using gravity to move you through the air… the rocking of the swing.. the gentle wind…."
---
…the way the breeze feels on my skin… the sun on my face..
---
"… there is a fan on in the room… feel the air on your skin…. That's good." Suzy let Lizzie's hips go, she was in the groove finally. She admired the how sensual Elizabeth was, her shoulder and hips working together to generate a soft wave. As she gently pushed Lizzie towards the pole, "there is a man in the shadows, he's sitting in a big ole chair watching you, but you can't see him… now dance for him Lizzie."
To her surprise, Elizabeth stepped forward and barely lifted her lids. She reached for the pole and held on to it. Walking around it, picking up her pace. After one full revolution building momentum Lizzie hooked her Achilles heel around the brass cylinder and pulled herself off the earth. It hurt but she didn't mind. Lizzie road the thrust as her body spiraled to the floor. Gracefully her other foot landed first. Bring the other along side she came to a stop in a squat.
---
…the man smiled, pleased, the shadow is covering all but his mouth. His long fingers grip the arm of the chair. He is restraining himself… his legs are far apart and I've made them tense…
---
From the squat Lizzie rolled her bottom up first and followed with her arched back. Standing in her baggy sweats, breast proud, ass unashamed, Lizzie fully opened her eyes.. The dark room of her imagination evaporated replaced with the studio and stares from Suzy, Kelly and some disgruntled nurses, all agape.
"What got in to you?" Kellie demanded with a growing grin.
---
Jason.
---
"Nothing… I don't know. I guess I just lost myself for a minute." But her face was suddenly flusher than the earlier work out had achieved.
"Class, if you saw that, it was the perfect demonstration of the Fireman's Swing." Suzy followed with applause and, everyone but the nurses, joined in; they turned their backs returning to their rudimentary maneuvers.
The skin at the back of Lizzie's ankle was red and tender. Her muscles had been stretched way beyond what they were used to. Despite that, Elizabeth felt sexy and a little nervous that Jason had a hand in getting her there, even if it was just in her imagination.
That high dampened slightly when she watched Dr. Lee grip the pole, climb up, sweep her shapely legs around it, bring her self forward, do the splits in the air and suspend herself there. The pediatrician just floated upside down in a display of purely elegant upper body strength.
---
Way to put Jason out of my mind Kellie! Thanks! I am so never gonna be able to pull that off! Suzy did give me props though. Geez I can't believe how big my ego is right now! One successful maneuver and a pat on the back from the teacher…You want to be a pole dancer! Elizabeth Webber: Nun By Day and Private Pole Dancer By Night: EXPOSED! For heaven's sake Lizzie. Grow up. You are a mother. That's right! You are one HOT MAMA!! – is this what they mean about empowerment? Am I doing this right?
---
In her East Texas accent Suzy announced to everyone how happy she was to see all the new faces and she hoped to see them all again. But she only winked at Lizzie.
Elizabeth watched the women as they filed out. The experienced ones all wore tanks and short-shorts. Other than Kellie, who was the trimmest, most of the woman had a few pounds that rolled and added to their curves. None of them seemed shy about any of it. They were mothers and housewives, teachers and account executives. Confidence in their bodies and an ease with laughter emanated from each one. Did they go home and dance for their lovers, for their husbands, for themselves?
Who could she dance for? On one hand men were the last creatures she should be concerned with. On the other hand, there were three grown ones she seemed to give a lot of her power to. Could she be a powerful, sexy woman and not give it away to a soft-lipped smile designed to weaken her knees?
"What's the matter Elizabeth?" Kellie was trying to assess Lizzie's expression.
Lingering thoughts of her fantasy crept in. Jason's smirk as he sat in the shadows watching her dance but she forced the image out.
"Nothing."
"You sure, Sweetie?"
"Yeah. I'm fine." Changing the subject, "everyone looks so normal. And besides mirrors, I half expected flashing disco lights, but no, it's just a studio that happens to have a dozen firemen poles."
"I told you. It's not at all what people expect. You had fun right?"
"A blast! " she answered sincerely. "I feel like that guy from the Fantastic Four though.. the rubber guy. I've never stretched so much!"
Like a summer breeze Suzy sauntered up to Kellie, "Girl, you make sure to bring this one back to me, OK?"
Elizabeth smiled bashfully.
"Look she's flirting with me already. Yes, yes Lizzie Dear. I will take you under my wing and whip you into shape. You will be climbing the pole in no time." The instructor's laughter sounded like a cheery church bell.
Kellie was all smiles too, "She has the look doesn't she? She's hooked." To Lizzie, "I warned you."
Some of the other gals Kellie recruited from General Hospital interrupted the trio. As they thanked the teacher and Kellie, Lizzie was given the cold shoulder. She would have excused her self but the other gals had already maneuvered their backs to Lizzie and effectively cut her out of the conversation.
---
You think you are getting to me? Hell no bitches. I still have seniority over you at the hospital. One day you are gonna need me to cover a shift or something. Do you think I'm gonna say yes? Hell no!
---
Lizzie made a quite exit letting the attitude of a few nurses roll off her shoulders. Once outside she called for a cab. For a second Lizzie thought about phoning for the Quartermaine limo but changed her mind. Kellie met her outside.
"Where's your car?"
"I hitched a ride with Dr. Quartermaine so we could put the car seats in her limo."
"Limo. Damn girl. Call the limo to come get you."
"I can't. She's already babysitting so I could come to this class. I can't impose any more."
"Um, it's the limo driver you're imposing on and he gets paid for it."
"I'm good with the taxi."
"Well, I'm not happy leaving a sexy, young mother waiting alone…" She bumped her hip to Lizzies.
"Kellie, go," Lizzie laughed, "I'll be fine."
Finally, at Lizzie's insistence, the pediatrician acquiesced.
Despite her cotton shirt, damp still with sweat, molding to her form, Lizzie held off putting on her hoodie. The night was unusually soft and warm though a chilly breeze was mixing in with the spring air like a cocktail. It felt intoxicatingly fresh on her skin. She daydreamed again about being on a swing, which morphed into swinging around the pole… and Jason.
Six months ago, Lizzie would never, ever consider taking a pole dancing class. Decades of pleasing others hadn't worked out so well so she was trying new things that interested HER. It's like she'd come full circle. Landing in Port Charles as a teen she was the town rebel, doing the exact opposite of what would please people. In between that time Lizzie had worn many hats for many people. Maybe life was forcing her back to the beginning so she could find out who she really was?
"It's just a dance class. How can I do any more damage?" she asked herself aloud.
---
I'll find away! Oh, Lizzie, no one is gonna ever know. Why would anyone care? We wore sweats and tee shirts. What's slutty about that? It was fun! Besides, even if it was sexy, what's wrong with that? Apparently I will have to show more skin if I wanna grip the pole though. Oh, I did love that little workout outfit the accountant had on! Wonder what it would look like on me? Hope they have it in pink. I think I need to go shopping. Not too sure about the 8-inch platforms Suzy wants me to get though…
---
The street was lonely now that all the cars abandoned their parking spots. Slow moving traffic passed on their way to restaurant row. The last people she expected to see were Detective Falconari and Lulu Spencer. But the car backing up, as the passenger window slid down, held none other than Lucky's little sister and her new beau, Sonny's long lost son.
"Need a ride?" Lulu's voice couldn't be any dryer. She stared out the front windshield as if Elizabeth wasn't there. Clearly it was Dante who insisted they pull over and not ignore a seemingly stranded woman.
"I'm fine, thanks. Taxi's on its way."
"See, Slut's fine." Lulu said to the driver in the same arid tone.
Lizzie gasped. "Let it go!!" putting her hands on her hips to take a firmer stance.
"You heard the slut, let's go. We've done our good deed for the day. I'm sure Mac will give you a gold st—"
Dante quickly ducked his head to speak and cut Lulu off. His eyes went immediately to Elizabeth's clingy shirt.
---
Don't you DARE cover up Elizabeth Webber!!! Remember what the teacher said! Embrace you sexuality. Besides fuck them if they can't take a joke! Go ahead Lulu, scoff all you want! Remember, I'm Port Charles' resident ManEater!!! WATCH OU!!
---
Lizzie couldn't help but giggle at the thoughts in her head. It threw Lulu to hear it revealing a chink in her armor but she held fast.
"Sorry Ms. Webber, we haven't met officially. I've seen you at the hospital. I'm Dante Falconari."
---
Eyes up here buddy.
---
Lizzie hunched down, despite the pain in her sore muscles, to be level with the car's doorframe; Dante's gaze followed. Fearing the blond might decide to take a bite out of her arm, Lizzie's reach into the car was tentative. Dante met her half way and shook her feminine hand.
"Nice to meet you, officially. Thanks for stopping." Taking back her hand she looked at Lulu who was still staring straight ahead. Lulu's expression said 'someone just took a crap in her lap and it was sooo inconvenient'. "Lulu, have you heard from your dad or Lucky."
"What's it to you?" bothering to turn her head a little so Lizzie could see the distain on her face.
"You know I talked to Luke a couple of nights before they left. He wanted you to know—"
"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT. Especially from YOU."
"He just wanted to get Lucky away so he wouldn't make things worse—"
"Oh yeah, you would think it's Lucky's fault. Never your fault, right Elizabeth?"
"Ok, Ok, ladies. Unless there is a vat of mud somewhere nearby, I'd rather not see you two pull each other's hair out." Lulu slapped Dante shoulder without so much as a twitch on her pretty face. "Owe." The driver glared at his blond passenger, "Are you sure you're Ok Ms. Webber?"
"Elizabeth."
"Elizabeth?" Dante winced in anticipation of another smack.
"I'm fine. Thanks."
____
Finally home, Lizzie found Monica contentedly rocking in the chair next to Jake's bed. The tike was sleeping soundly, little hands twitching as he dreamed of chasing ducks at the park. They were trying separate bedrooms for the boys. Jake was taking to his room just fine but Cameron was showing some anxiety.
"How was class?" Monica whispered.
"Fun. Really, you will have to come once." Monica looked skeptical. "Really. It's great for building your core strength." She flashed a teasing smile. "I need a shower but I'm wanna check on Cam first. Can you hang out?"
Monica nodded and continued to rock slowly.
Alone in his big room Cameron had all the covers over his head. He was so still she couldn't tell if he was asleep.
"Mommy?"
"Yes Cam?" She came around the bed to sit beside him. Speaking to the mound of blankets, Elizabeth asked, "Is everything ok?"
"Um, is Jake ahwhite?"
"He's fine Honey. Monica is with him." She placed a comforting hand where she thought his head was.
"So nobody came and stowe him?"
"No, he's fine. Is that what you think? Someone is gonna steal your brother?" She gently pulled the covers over to find her little boy curled up.
"They did befo'," Cam stated with sincere eyes gazing up at her.
Elizabeth sighed. It was released from deep in her lungs. A breath she had sucked in over a year ago and not let out till now.
"Bad guys came 'n got him. I was 'posed to watch him but he didn't fo'ow me when I said we hadda hide."
"I know Honey but that's not your fault. That was mommy's fault. I should have been there. I'm sorry I let you down Baby. I let you both down. But we got Jake back safe and sound."
"Jason and Sam saved him."
Sam. Lizzie swallowed her medicine, "Yes, they did and we are so thankful, aren't we?" Cam nodded as he sat up on his knees. Lizzie patted his dark curls. "I wish it never happened but the good thing is you and Jake have SO many people who love you. If you got lost, me and all the other people who love you so much would never EVER stop looking for you. So if a bad guy EVER tries to take one of my boys again they are gonna have to get through me first. "
"Weally?"
"Uh huh. And look at what else is a fact. Did Jason find Jake?"
"Yeah, bowf times."
"So what does that tell you? A guy would have to be pretty stupid to try and take one of my boys when they know Jason is just gonna find them anyway, right?"
"RIGHT." Cam jumped into his mother's arms and gave her a big hug. "So is Jason watchin' us wight now?"
Elizabeth coughed to stall, "Umm… maybe, no… I…"
Cam pulled back and clapped his mother's face between his tiny palms. Rubbing her cheeks and pushing them forward to make her have a funny face, "Cause he was here be'fo. He played wiff Monica an' Jake an' me."
Just then Elizabeth noticed Dr. Quartermaine in the doorway. Lizzie snuck a look at the heart specialist who gave a confirming nod to back up Cameron's claim.
Talking through puckered lips making Cam giggle, "Then he might be but he probably went home to sleep because he knows we are safe."
"And he was tyw'ed."
"Right. Tired. Did you tire him out?"
Dropping his hands and giggling, "He was the horsey." Cam snickered as he snuggled against his mom.
"Whaaaat?" Shocked, Lizzie needed another confirmation. Monica nodded with a grin and shrug as she folded her arms under her breasts. Lizzie shook her head in disbelief.
"Ok giggle-head, time for bed."
"Can I go say g'night to Jake again?"
"Only because I love you so, so, so much. You should be asleep young man."
She lifted him with her when she stood. They passed Monica and went to Jake's room. Once Cam was sure Jake was fine they walked back to his room. Lizzie tucked the covers tightly around him. Pulling a few of his stuffed animals to rest around his pillowed crown.
Speaking softly to Monica who lingered in the doorway, "It's OK, you can go. Thanks for everything."
Monica waved goodbye and blew Cam a goodnight kiss. They waved back. Then Lizzie lay her stiffening body down next to her son to whisper a fairy tale in his ear. She stayed with Cameron till he fell asleep which didn't take long.
She grabbed a quick shower. The hot water felt so good on her taxed muscles. Liz tried to picture Jason on all fours bouncing two little boys on his back. It just wasn't possible. It was like trying to picture Jason in swim trunks, or something, but with his big, bad enforcer expression. One can't look lethal in Hawaiian board shorts. The two things just don't go together. Even when it's to the delight of young children, a six-foot enforcer can't be macho crawling around on hands and knees, whinnying like a pony.
Something in the universe was off; Elizabeth Webber was pole dancing and Jason Morgan was playing horsey…