Merry Christmas... Well, close enough. Only five more days. Anyone else excited?
I am, for once in my life. Anyone reading that Christmas story (well, both
of them) I wrote? The Twelve Days of Christmas and a Least Likely
Of All/Formidolosus Draco, Take Me Away Christmas cookie. If you haven't
read them, at least go read the cookie - you may like it. :o)
Aimée
That day, I spent most of my time in the bedroom Draco had set up for me; he had decorated with various Quidditch teams, trophies, and pictures of my family. I had placed a picture of Draco on my nightstand and I had spent the past seven hours starring at it, lost in my thoughts. I had taken it the year previous, on the streets of London. He was wearing a beige trench coat and walking with his head down; his eyes, however, were looking up at the camera and smiling, as if all the answers to the world's problems laid behind those eyes.
He was only a room away, but I felt as if I'd never see him again. He was everything I had ever wanted in a best friend and a partner, and I was being forced to simply throw him away, just like that. It upset me to no ends, knowing the one thing I wanted – needed – most in life was only a few meters away, yet as unreachable as the end of the universe. No one had any idea how much I loved him and needed him – no one, not even him, who I knew loved me as much as I loved him.
I must have fallen asleep sometime, because the next thing I knew, I was waking up to a pitch-black room – save a candle sitting on the nightstand next to me, recently lit. I followed it's soft beams of light into the farthest corner of the room, before my eyes finally spotted a shock of white-blonde hair at the foot of my bed.
Draco was leaning against the foot of my bed, gazing up at the dimly lit posters and collages lining my walls. I watched him for a moment before sitting up quietly and moving down the bed, reaching down and touching his shoulder gently. Even this small gesture sent shockwaves through my veins, further reminding me of something I could never again have.
"Harry," he said softly, almost mournfully. "You're awake."
I simply nodded, removing my hand from his shoulder. I could see his shoulder lift up a bit in protest, but he didn't say a word.
"How long have you been here?" I asked quietly, terrified that if I spoke too loud, he'd disappear.
"Only about a half hour," he answered, turning around to meet my eyes. "I just wanted to make sure you were ok."
I nodded, a tight knot forming in my throat. "I – I'm fine. What time is it?"
"About seven o'clock." Answered Draco, scooting around uncomfortably. I realized sitting on the hard wooden floor couldn't be relaxing, so I immediately offered him a place on the bed. He thought for a moment, probably contemplating if I'd get the wrong idea of us being on the same bed once more – never mind the fact we were both fully clothed – and finally joining me.
"You scared me today," he admitted, running his cool fingers tentatively over the back of my hand. "I was… I was so afraid… something…"
"Nothing happened," I said firmly. "I just went a bit crazy and I couldn't figure out how to handle things, that's all."
"But… what if…" Draco stopped abruptly for a moment, regaining his composure. "What if we weren't magical? What if you had fallen and nothing was there to stop you? You'd be gone, and I'd have nothing left."
I blinked, then gently set a hand on his arm. "I'm still here, Draco. I'm still breathing, and I'm sure I don't plan on dying anytime soon anymore. I wouldn't do that to you, and I realize how stupid I was to think somehow…" I sighed, "To think that somehow, me dying would make you feel as bad as possible and maybe, just maybe, you'd feel the pain I was feeling."
I smirked at my own story, my fingers lighting tracing a random pattern on his bicep. "It took me about ten stories to realize that you were already feeling the pain I was."
Slowly, Draco leaned over, and ever so carefully placed his forehead on the curve of my neck. It was a comforting, familiar feeling, one I craved to feel again. I gently brought my hand up and ran it through his hair, starring off at the wall and just concentrating on the feeling of his skin against mine.
"I don't want anything to happen to you," he whispered, his breath tickling my collarbone. "I'd die without you… you're my life. You're the only thing that keeps me grounded, I don't care whether we're together or not… Just you being in the same home as I am gives me reason to live."
I breathed in deeply, the deepest part of my being bursting with emotion for the man next to me. I didn't know what to say – any words that came out of my mouth would diminish my true feelings, make them seem Earthly, when in reality they were everything but conceivable.
"You're my everything," I whispered, barely more than a breath escaping my lips. "It's impossible for me to tell you everything I want to say, everything I feel, because words… Words would make them seem human, and they're not."
I felt a wet teardrop hit my shoulder, and I realized for the first time Draco was crying; it was the second time I had ever seen him do such a thing, and the fact he chose this moment in time to do so astounded me greatly.
"No one needs to know," I whispered. "It's not their life to live… it's ours. They wouldn't need to know."
I felt one more teardrop hit my shoulder blade before Draco lifted his head up, gray eyes crashing into green as they had so many times before.
"Do you promise they'll never know?" he asked quietly, his voice slightly hoarse. "I love your family, Harry. I don't want to be hated by them for simply loving you."
"No one will know," I reassured him. "And in the small chance anyone would find out, no one could ever hate you, especially not my family. You'll always have me… I promise."
Draco closed his eyes for a moment, then opened them once again and gently kissed me. It was a quick kiss, yet it said so much about how he wanted it to be… How I wanted it to be… How it was going to be.
When he pulled away, we needed no words; we would try our damndest to make this work, and somehow it had to work.
That night was the longest I had ever experienced. We talked until daybreak, occasionally touching and making sure it wasn't a dream. I had him back – I wasn't prepared to let him go for a very, very long time. He was all that I wanted, all that I needed, and I couldn't think of a single thing he didn't give me that I wanted.
He was my elixir of life, the light guiding me, the one thing that mattered to me. I was prepared to die for him, should the situation arise. Nothing could be better – nothing I had ever experienced felt as good as his body next to mine, his voice in my ear telling me he loved me, knowing every word he said was true…
Little did I know how quickly things were about to change.
Find me here
Speak to me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place
Where I find peace again
You are the strength
That keeps me walking
You are the hope
That keeps me trusting
You are the life
To my soul
You are my purpose
You are everything
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this
You calm the storms
You give me rest
You hold me in your hands
You won't let me fall
You still my heart
And you take my breath away
Would you take me in
Would you take me deeper now
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this
Cause you're all I want
You are all I need
You are everything
Everything
You are all I want
You are all I need
You are everything
Everything
You are all I want
You are all I need
You are everything
Everything
You are all I want
You are all I need
You are everything
Everything
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better
Any better than this
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this*
*Lifehouse, Everything - download this song, it's absolutely amazing.
Aimée
That day, I spent most of my time in the bedroom Draco had set up for me; he had decorated with various Quidditch teams, trophies, and pictures of my family. I had placed a picture of Draco on my nightstand and I had spent the past seven hours starring at it, lost in my thoughts. I had taken it the year previous, on the streets of London. He was wearing a beige trench coat and walking with his head down; his eyes, however, were looking up at the camera and smiling, as if all the answers to the world's problems laid behind those eyes.
He was only a room away, but I felt as if I'd never see him again. He was everything I had ever wanted in a best friend and a partner, and I was being forced to simply throw him away, just like that. It upset me to no ends, knowing the one thing I wanted – needed – most in life was only a few meters away, yet as unreachable as the end of the universe. No one had any idea how much I loved him and needed him – no one, not even him, who I knew loved me as much as I loved him.
I must have fallen asleep sometime, because the next thing I knew, I was waking up to a pitch-black room – save a candle sitting on the nightstand next to me, recently lit. I followed it's soft beams of light into the farthest corner of the room, before my eyes finally spotted a shock of white-blonde hair at the foot of my bed.
Draco was leaning against the foot of my bed, gazing up at the dimly lit posters and collages lining my walls. I watched him for a moment before sitting up quietly and moving down the bed, reaching down and touching his shoulder gently. Even this small gesture sent shockwaves through my veins, further reminding me of something I could never again have.
"Harry," he said softly, almost mournfully. "You're awake."
I simply nodded, removing my hand from his shoulder. I could see his shoulder lift up a bit in protest, but he didn't say a word.
"How long have you been here?" I asked quietly, terrified that if I spoke too loud, he'd disappear.
"Only about a half hour," he answered, turning around to meet my eyes. "I just wanted to make sure you were ok."
I nodded, a tight knot forming in my throat. "I – I'm fine. What time is it?"
"About seven o'clock." Answered Draco, scooting around uncomfortably. I realized sitting on the hard wooden floor couldn't be relaxing, so I immediately offered him a place on the bed. He thought for a moment, probably contemplating if I'd get the wrong idea of us being on the same bed once more – never mind the fact we were both fully clothed – and finally joining me.
"You scared me today," he admitted, running his cool fingers tentatively over the back of my hand. "I was… I was so afraid… something…"
"Nothing happened," I said firmly. "I just went a bit crazy and I couldn't figure out how to handle things, that's all."
"But… what if…" Draco stopped abruptly for a moment, regaining his composure. "What if we weren't magical? What if you had fallen and nothing was there to stop you? You'd be gone, and I'd have nothing left."
I blinked, then gently set a hand on his arm. "I'm still here, Draco. I'm still breathing, and I'm sure I don't plan on dying anytime soon anymore. I wouldn't do that to you, and I realize how stupid I was to think somehow…" I sighed, "To think that somehow, me dying would make you feel as bad as possible and maybe, just maybe, you'd feel the pain I was feeling."
I smirked at my own story, my fingers lighting tracing a random pattern on his bicep. "It took me about ten stories to realize that you were already feeling the pain I was."
Slowly, Draco leaned over, and ever so carefully placed his forehead on the curve of my neck. It was a comforting, familiar feeling, one I craved to feel again. I gently brought my hand up and ran it through his hair, starring off at the wall and just concentrating on the feeling of his skin against mine.
"I don't want anything to happen to you," he whispered, his breath tickling my collarbone. "I'd die without you… you're my life. You're the only thing that keeps me grounded, I don't care whether we're together or not… Just you being in the same home as I am gives me reason to live."
I breathed in deeply, the deepest part of my being bursting with emotion for the man next to me. I didn't know what to say – any words that came out of my mouth would diminish my true feelings, make them seem Earthly, when in reality they were everything but conceivable.
"You're my everything," I whispered, barely more than a breath escaping my lips. "It's impossible for me to tell you everything I want to say, everything I feel, because words… Words would make them seem human, and they're not."
I felt a wet teardrop hit my shoulder, and I realized for the first time Draco was crying; it was the second time I had ever seen him do such a thing, and the fact he chose this moment in time to do so astounded me greatly.
"No one needs to know," I whispered. "It's not their life to live… it's ours. They wouldn't need to know."
I felt one more teardrop hit my shoulder blade before Draco lifted his head up, gray eyes crashing into green as they had so many times before.
"Do you promise they'll never know?" he asked quietly, his voice slightly hoarse. "I love your family, Harry. I don't want to be hated by them for simply loving you."
"No one will know," I reassured him. "And in the small chance anyone would find out, no one could ever hate you, especially not my family. You'll always have me… I promise."
Draco closed his eyes for a moment, then opened them once again and gently kissed me. It was a quick kiss, yet it said so much about how he wanted it to be… How I wanted it to be… How it was going to be.
When he pulled away, we needed no words; we would try our damndest to make this work, and somehow it had to work.
That night was the longest I had ever experienced. We talked until daybreak, occasionally touching and making sure it wasn't a dream. I had him back – I wasn't prepared to let him go for a very, very long time. He was all that I wanted, all that I needed, and I couldn't think of a single thing he didn't give me that I wanted.
He was my elixir of life, the light guiding me, the one thing that mattered to me. I was prepared to die for him, should the situation arise. Nothing could be better – nothing I had ever experienced felt as good as his body next to mine, his voice in my ear telling me he loved me, knowing every word he said was true…
Little did I know how quickly things were about to change.
Find me here
Speak to me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place
Where I find peace again
You are the strength
That keeps me walking
You are the hope
That keeps me trusting
You are the life
To my soul
You are my purpose
You are everything
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this
You calm the storms
You give me rest
You hold me in your hands
You won't let me fall
You still my heart
And you take my breath away
Would you take me in
Would you take me deeper now
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this
Cause you're all I want
You are all I need
You are everything
Everything
You are all I want
You are all I need
You are everything
Everything
You are all I want
You are all I need
You are everything
Everything
You are all I want
You are all I need
You are everything
Everything
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this
And how can I
Stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better
Any better than this
Would you tell me
How could it be
Any better than this*
*Lifehouse, Everything - download this song, it's absolutely amazing.