Mr Vargas cleared his throat as he stood in front of the large group of teenagers, clicking his fingers as he prepared for his impromptu performance. Mr Vargas did a thumbs up at his grandson Lovino, who was standing near the front of the crowd and Mr Vargas pretended he didn't see the way Lovino's face paled when he opened his mouth to start singing.
"Near... Far... Wherever you are... You better be quiet so I can taaaaaaaaaaalk to yooooou."
The chatter died down and the majority of the students gathered outside the forest/the place they went to looked horrified. Some giggles rushed through the crowd as someone loudly asked what the hell that was meant to be.
"I see my stunning version of 'My Heart Will Go On' has captured your attention! Now!" Mr Vargas clapped his hands and smiled, "Today is the day you're going to be tested on your colonising skills! You've been placed in random groups and there are some rules we would like you to follow! And while I doubt any of these rules will be broken, some of you may want to pay close attention to what you shouldn't be doing."
"Hurry up, idiot!"
Mr Vargas placed a hand on his heart and wiped away an imaginary tear, "Lovi! Don't be that way!" he clapped his hands again and continued on with his speech, "First rule: don't wander off! You may think you have the correct skills to walk around on your own, trying to find somewhere to colonise, but you don't! So stay with your group! Clear?"
Mr Vargas nodded in approval as most students grumbled the affirmative, "Rule two; no physical force! Though this occasionally works, you don't need to use it on each other or the dummies we have placed around this unknown territory. Oh, yeah! There are a bunch of dummies lying around and you and your group have to find one and practice colonising!"
"Why do we need dummies?"
"Good question. I thought it was so you actually know where good places for colonies are, but it could be for anything." Mr Vargas shrugged, "Rule 3: Stay safe! As much as I hate to say this, at least one of you will injure yourselves at some point in this trip, so let's keep it to a minimum!"
"Don't forget about us." a teacher muttered and Mr Vargas hoped his smile would melt any unhappiness.
"How could I forget about you?" Mr Vargas laughed awkwardly, "The teachers will be stationed at convenient points through these 'uncharted lands', so if you get yourselves into a pickle, they can help you. It also means no funny business." Mr Vargas pointed his finger at the students in conclusion.
A student raised their hand and started speaking before Mr Vargas had a chance to acknowledge them, "Excuse me, but isn't sending us out there without any prior knowledge dangerous?"
Mr Vargas laughed, "Of course it is! You'll be given a map that shows the perimeter of this forest, but you have to fill in the middle! This is a lot more information than you'd get if you were actually trying to colonise somewhere, so be grateful!"
Matthew raised a tentative hand, but Mr Vargas ignored him and carried on talking. Gilbert rolled his eyes and whispered to Mattie, who whispered back, wide eyed. Gilbert then put his hands to his mouth and yelled:
"Oi Mr Vargas! Mattie here-" he was cut off by Matthew shoving him in the ribs, blushing furiously. "Ok fine, the awesome me will say it. Mr Vargas, do we get to pick our own groups?"
Mr Vargas laughed and shook his head. "No, no. We have already sorted you into a group. You have to make use of whatever you each brought along, no planning ahead with others,"
This caused much discussion between the students, which was soon stifled by Mr Vargas bellowing that if they wanted to find out their groups they better come here right now.
Elizaveta gestured to the other members of the ship club, and they all huddled around, listening closely.
"Ok," she said, doing a quick headcount. "This would be the perfect opportunity to get some good quality insight on our pairings, right? Has everybody brought their cameras?" they all nodded, except for Francis and Gilbert, who were joking about in the background.
"Good. No remember, no interfering-"
"What's that I hear, mon ami?" Francis was finally paying attention, and he poked his head through the gap between Elizaveta and Kiku's shoulders. "No interfering?"
"Mein gott Lizzy, that's lame," said Gilbert, throwing an arm around her and Francis's shoulders. "Enough with the unawesome stalking, I think it's time for some matchmaking!"
"Gilbert," growled Elizaveta, shoving his arm off. "If you don't like the club's methods, why don't you just leave?"
Gilbert pouted comically, spiked hair completing the look of demonic changeling. "If I leave this club would lose its awesome factor! Besides, I've already been kicked out of the music club. I can't handle that much rejection!"
Elizaveta recalled the music club incident. A mop, a pair of headphones and an angry but blushing Austrian had been involved.
"Yeah yeah, whatever," she said, moving on. "Now, there is no phone reception out here, but Kiku came up with an alternate solution. Please pass them around, Kiku,"
Kiku proceeded to pass around a bag, which the members of the ship club dipped their hands into suspiciously, drawing out...
"Kesesese, this is too good!" Laughed Gilbert, tossing his own chunky object into the air and catching it with ease. "Walkie talkies? You have got to be kidding me!"
"Oh, I hate you sometimes," Elizaveta huffed, flicking her hair out of her face. "But as one half of my OTP I suppose I should refrain from bashing you with my frying pan,"
"One half... Wait, what-"
"Don't you think it's time for us to get our groups?" Butted in Toris, who had been silent all this time. He was fidgeting uncomfortably, probably scared that he had been put in a group with Ivan.
"Oh! Yes, you are right. But one last thing before we split up," Elizaveta said, catching hold of the sleeve of a small blonde boy trying to sneak away, "Congratulations to Tino and Berwald, they are finally going out!"
Everybody cheered, Tino's friend Eduard patted him on the back, Gilbert and Francis wolf whistled, and Feliks called out; "Like, about time! You totally have got to tell me every detail!"
After fighting his way through dense bush, sweating in the heat, swearing profusely at the members of his group, and trying very hard not to stare at Antonio, Lovino decided that enough was enough. He sidled causally up to Antonio and tugged at his sleeve, facing the other way so he couldn't see that bastard's expression.
"Listen, bastard, about last night..." he said, unsure of what he was going to say next. But Antonio butted in, his face unreadable.
"Look Lovi, I'm sorry. I... I didn't mean anything by it..."
Lovino felt the blow as if he had just been physically struck, felt those words Antonio had just mumbled enter his brain and scream at him. Antonio said he liked him, didn't he? That bastard had got Lovino's hopes up, and just at that crucial moment he had brought Lovino's fragile hope crashing down around his ears.
Antonio carried on, unaware of what pain his babbling was causing. "I shouldn't have said those things, I wasn't thinking. I didn't really mean them in that way, you know? I don't like you like you, if you know what I mean-"
But Lovino had stormed off, leaving Antonio in mid-sentence staring after him as he pushed his way through the dense bush.
A/N: Ahehehe... Stars here... This is all her fault. I admit it. I am evil. But this is what happens when you don't write for ages Alpha. I hit a block to end all blocks. And Supernatural got really intense. She turned up to school traumatised one day and sat there in Latin going "Holy shit Supernatural holy shit so intense I am actually freaking out," (Episode 11 of Season 4 is the scariest thing in the world)
However, Alphabet gets credit for the first bit of this chapter. So I shouldn't accuse her of slacking off so much. Sorry. (But that was like, 3 weeks ago!) Er. It was. APOLOGIES.
Well enough of that. I hope you enjoyed the latest installment of The Documented Dilemma Of Lovino Vargas, and we leave you hanging until next week What shall happen with Lovi and Toni? Dun dun DUUUUN...
STARS' BIRTHDAY IS ON FRIDAY. Thanks for reminding me ;) I can freak out now.
goddamn it. i have lost the ability to type.