Just crack as usual. Next chapter we will get back to using suggestions from our beloved reviewer. Thank all of you for taking the time of day to be amused by our short stories of crack. Stay sexie

-RabidSheep

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In a parking lot two men stand in business suits talking. Their goal is to sell cars but seeing as at the moment it is six freaking AM there are obviously no customers.

Grimmjow turns to Szayel and makes sure Aizen is not looking at them before he speaks.

"All I am saying is that if I was as ugly as him I wouldn't know what to do with myself."

"Oh I would die, I know I would." Szayel says, leaning against a nearby old Toyota with hands in his pants pockets.

"I mean does he look at himself in a mirror before he wakes up?!"

"I bet he tried but the mirror broke."

The both snicker and then throw quick glances to where Aizen stands inside the store talking on the phone.

"You think he can hear us?" The sexta questions.

"Not a chance. Unless he can read lips then there is no way he knows that we are talking about him. "

Inside the store.

"Yes Mister Gonzalas we have many red cars here. Yes they still run. Okay. Okay I look forward to seeing you later today. Goody bye." Aizen sets the receiver down with a soft click. He can see through the large windows that Szayel and Grimmjow are standing in the lot waiting for customers and chatting.

In a room nearby Halibel and her fraccion Mila Rose work cleaning the display car.

"Oh my goodness, did you see how handsome Grimmjow looks in a tie?!" Mila Rose giggles.

"Its nice to see him wearing clothing that is not ripped half to shreds." Halibel agrees.

"To bad about Aizen, tho. If only he wasn't so ugly."

"Don't say that."

"Well don't you think its sad? How he can be so brilliant yet so ugly?"

"He couldn't choose how his face looks."

"I wonder what he slicks his hair back with...looks like he uses cooking grease." Mila rose says but gets a shammy thrown in her face from Halibel's side of the car.

In the back room Stark uses a broken off car mirror to get something out from between his teeth. Gin sits on some crates that should have been unpacked hours ago.

"What you got?"

"I dunno, I thinks its some egg from this morning."

"You can use my zanpaktou if you want something sharp." Gin jokes with that creepy grin plastered on his face.

"Got it!" Stark says, putting the food scrap on a piece of tissue paper.

"Eeww."

"What?"

"That tie color is not working for you, Stark my friend."

"What do you mean? Halibel said green was my color!"

"Have you see what she wears inside the castle? Its all white!"

"Gin, we all wear all white clothing in Las Noches."

Gin pouts for a second but he will not be detoured so easily.

"Come here and switch ties with me."

"Okay."

"Yeah see now blue is much more befitting your eyes."

Stark looks himself over in the mirror again, fitting Gins tie on as he does so.

"I suppose you have a point."

"You look absolutely dashing! Unlike dear Aizen."

"Poor sap. What do you think makes him so ugly?"

"Maybe he was born with it."

"You can be born with the ugly!?!"

"I think you can, I had a friend once who-" Without warning the door burst open to reveal Lord Aizen standing there, he jingles a pair of keys in his hand.

"Can you two come to the front and move some cars around back behind the building?"

"Sure."

"As you wish, Aizen-sama."

Dawn begins painting the clear sky in shades of pastels as the sun makes an appearance in the eastern edge of the horizon. The sunrise is reflected on the dark windows of the cars and the chill of the night begins to die off as warm rays of light penetrate the air. Grimmjow turns towards the light as the golden glow paints his face and the breeze blows through his teal hair. Stark and Gin take some cars around back, the growl of the cars engines fades as they round ebhind the building.

Gin parks his beat up Jeep beside Stark's less then wonderful Lincoln. Costumers were beginning to pull up and drift about the lot. Stark climbs in the back seat of the Lincoln and falls asleep, hoping Aizen would not notice his absence.

Abruptly there is a loud hollering a d whooping coming from the front of the dealership.

"Why now?" Szayel laments while rubbing his eyes. "Why do they have to come now?"

"Who is that?" Grimmjow asks while squinting into the sunlight as about five shiny new cars come revving thier engines and parading into the parking lot.

"Its Ichigo and company from our rival dealership. They sell new cars while we sell used up pieces of junk."

"ICHIGO!?" Grimmjow feels his fingers twitch to rip that orange haired punk to shreds, even tho his zanpaktou is in Aizen's office right now.(there was an incident involving peanut butter and a gerbel) Maybe pinky here would let him borrow his sword.

"Oh no I see that look in your eye. Your not getting Fornicarás!"

Grimjow looks up at him and puts on his best starving-puppy-dog face. The octava is not phased by the display.

"Stop that! You're a grown man and that's creepy."

"Let me borrow your sword! You know Aizen wont let me have mine back after what I did this morning!"

"What DID you do to make him so angry?"

"I smeared peanut butter on Pookie and-"

"Who's Pookie?!"

"My pet gerbel."

"Oh carry on then."

"And then I showed him to Aizen and-"

"Hey! What are you idiots doing?! Kissing?!" Ichigo chants out his window whilst pulling up beside the two Espada.

"Oh your going down!" Grimmjow snarls while taking Szayels sword and charging the car.

Inside his office Aizen sense a crazy charge in spiritual pressure coming from the parking lot. There is only one person who is so careless with the amount of spiritual pressure rolling off his body. Ichigo Kurosaki. A faint grin touches the lips of the Espada king as he slowly stands and walks outside. What he sees makes even the great Aizen stop and stare slack jawed.

Ichigo, Ishida, and Orihime are all on top of Grimmjow and beating up the enraged Sexta while Szayel stands off to the sidelines ripping out his hair and yelling something about his precious Fornicarás getting scratched. Grimmjow starts charging up his Cero but he is smothered by Orihime's very large bosom.

"WOMAN GET YOUR NUNGA-NUNGA'S OUT OF MY FACE BEFORE I OBLITERATE YOU!" Grimmjow succeeds in shoving her off him only to have Ichigo pounce on his chest.

"Just give up already, Espada. You can't win this." The teen commands while pinning the arms of the Espada to the pavement.

Ishida draws his quincy bow and aims it at the blue haired one.

"I got him covered, Ichigo-" WHACK! Ishida is smacked on the back of the head by a crowbar wielded in the hands of Gin. The dark-haired Quincy slumps to the ground, completely knocked out.

"You guys were having a party and you didn't invite ME?" Gin says with a wicked smirk.

"Szayel, how the hell do you get this sword to go into its released state!?!" Grimmjow grows while trying to hit Ichigo on the head with the sword.

"You have to shoved it down your throat." The pink haired one says while looking as if about to cry at the mistreatment of his zanpaktou.

"Are you crazy! What kind of release is THAT?!"

Szayel walks off to go sit by himself behind a car and muttering "It only works for me, tho."

Aizen comes up behind Ichigo and start to draw out Kyoka Suigetsu from its sheath at his hip.

"I've been waiting a long time for this...Kurosaki Ichigo." His voice is soft yet holding the command of a god among pathetic ants.

Ichigo just has time to glance over his shoulder and roll away from the blade that swings down towards his neck. The blade of Aizen's sword sparks as it hits the pavement where Grimmjow and Ichigo had just been wrestling for dominance.

"Why is this ugly girl suddenly attacking me and who is she?" The teen asks the Espada beside him.

Aizen glares at Ichigo. Gin falls on the ground laughing his butt off at the fact that Ichigo has the espada lord confused with an ugly girl. Grimmjow leaps to the top of a nearby truck and stands back to let Aizen finish the teen off.

"You don't recognize me, friend Ichigo?" The man says in his infuriatingly calm voice.

"No, mam."

"I am Sosuke Aizen."

"Man, this girl must be on something..." Orihime mutters to Ichigo. He nods in agreement but draws out Zangetsu just incase.

Ichigo puts his finger in his ear as if hearing some inner voice talking to him.

"No! No I am not letting you out! Do you remember what you did to Rukia's brother? He couldn't sit for a week!"

Everyone stares at Ichigo as he talks to himself.

"Shut-shut up! Just shut up!" The teen says smacking the side of his own head with the wide part of Zangetsu. Seeing everyone staring at him Ichigo looks back with a weak smile.

"My..inner..hollow keeps ..being...erm...annoying."

Aizen blinks.

"Uh okay...Where was I? Oh yes, prepare to die."

"You are the ugliest little girl I have ever seen." Orihime suddenly chirps.

Aizen feels his left eye begin to twitch. 'Breath deep, Aizen, remember what the anger management teacher said; count backwards.'

"Five...four..three...two..."

Ichigo starts back up. "Oh crap."

"One..."The espada lord lets out a long breath and grins at Ichigo.

For no reason at all Grimmjow rides a motorcycle through the parking lot while not wearing any clothing.

"I'm NAKED!!"

With that as a distraction Ichigo gathered Ishida and Orihime and drove off back to their rival dealership.

Aizen calls all the Arrancar outside the dealership then get on top of a tall truck before his servants. He holds a speaker phone up to his lips to make sure these idiots can hear him.

"I CAN HEAR ALL OF YOU CALLING ME UGLY. JUST REMEMBER: I KNOW WHERE ALL OF YOU LIVE AND I WILL BE WATCHING YOU AS YOU SLEEP, TONIGHT."

Suddenly all the arrancar present feel their blood start to run cold.