Sleep did not come easily, as Mercy tried to imagine what would happen at the jail the following day. She wanted to see the torture end. She wanted to see the people of Hope County freed. But she struggled with the notion of freedom now. Each side defined it differently. Mercy defined it as happiness. She couldn't deny the feelings of happiness and contentment she got from helping people - really helping people. That made her feel free. And at the end of it all, she was struggling to come to terms with her feelings for John, knowing full well that being with him meant being in the Project. But she had fallen asleep eventually, her dreams jumbled and twisted.
She stood outside the prison with John, alone, without any backup. They were faced with an army of Resistance fighters, Whitehorse front and centre, looking at them through narrowed eyes.
"Get 'em."
There was confusion as the Resistance charged at them. John grabbed her hand and tried to pull her away, but he was punched in the jaw by someone and he dropped her hand before falling to the ground. She tried to go to him, but the dream changed and she found herself inside a prison cell, restrained by one of the Resistance fighters, while John was chained to the wall opposite. Blood dripped down his face from his nose, and his shirt was gone, revealing deep cuts through all of his scars and tattoos.
Whitehorse turned from John and wiped the bloody knife he was holding on his pant leg. He smiled at her and tore her shirt open to reveal her tattoo.
"Your turn, kid." he said, pressing the tip of the knife to her skin next to the 'W'. "We'll get you away from that cult, you'll see."
She started to struggle against her captor, who was holding her upper arms, trying to put her hands up to protect herself. "No," she pleaded, fruitlessly trying to swat the knife away. "No stop, stop. Earl, please. Don't."
As he started to press the knife into her skin, the dream changed again. She was sitting on the couch in Seed Ranch, a book in her lap, and John looking at her.
"Why do you even bother going to your room?" she asked him.
He walked away from her and she followed him into his room. He undressed her slowly, then himself, before leading her to the bed and wrapping his arms around her. She lay her head on his chest and relaxed, finally feeling she had a place to belong.
She woke up alone, in an unfamiliar room. Once she realised where she was, she got dressed and left the small house, finding John outside, shirtless, and talking to Brother James. They stopped talking as she approached. John looked as relaxed and carefree as he usually did. He was almost impossible to read, unless he wanted to convey emotion. Mercy, on the other hand, was a wreck, and it showed. She'd checked herself in the bathroom mirror before coming outside, and thought she looked like she'd been hit by a train. Her hair was dishevelled, she had bags under her eyes, and she seemed to have a permanent frown she couldn't get rid of. Her worries showed on her face, and she needed comfort, so she took John's hand and put her head on his bare shoulder.
Eventually they went back inside and John sat her down, finally telling her what was essentially the Project's Doomsday Plan. Each region of Hope county had its own bunker that was controlled and managed by John, Jacob and Faith. The bunkers were all connected by tunnels deep underground. Joseph said the bunkers would be used as Noah's Ark was, shielding people to survive the Collapse. The bunker system was Eden's Gate - the Project members would march to the gate when the Collapse came. Joseph predicted it would take seven years for the world to recover after the bombs fell. After those seven years, he and his family of survivors would emerge from Eden's Gate into the new world.
The bunkers had massive storage facilities for provisions such as food and medicine, as well as vehicles, weapons and even hydroponic facilities they could use to continue growing some plants and food. Everything had been accounted for, he said. They had more than enough supplies. Joseph wanted the human race to endure and survive. He wanted to save as many people as he could.
"If you can, try and convince them to join the Project," he'd instructed her. "I know you would prefer if they were unharmed."
He'd remained silent when she asked him what his preference was.
And so here she was, standing in front of the Hope County Jail, surrounded by Project guards, countless thoughts rattling around in her head. How am I supposed to convince them to join the damn Project when I'm struggling to believe in it completely myself? A nuclear war just seemed like something from a fairytale. Yes, it was a possibility, but surely they weren't that close to the brink?
John stood beside her, holding a megaphone. "Use this, instead of going up to the gate. Easier for us to get out if they retaliate," he said.
She took the megaphone from him and nodded. "I don't know what to say," she mumbled to the device in her hands.
He stepped back. "Yes, you do." He fixed his gaze on the prison, looking past her, hands clasped behind his back. She turned from him, following his gaze, and held the megaphone to her mouth.
"Sheriff," Mercy said, her voice echoing around the grounds. "Sheriff it's the Deputy… it's Rook. I've come to talk to you, but I need you to come out unarmed. Please, I just want to talk." She screwed her face up. This is never going to work. She felt childish and lame, like a teenager whose new boyfriend's family was meeting her family for the first time. Except the family on both sides is huge and everyone has a gun - except for her.
Faces appeared over the gate. "Oh my god, Dep!" Whitehorse exclaimed. "Dep, it's really you! Hang in there, kid!"
A few minutes later he came out of the compound with ten other members of the Resistance. They all looked unarmed, but if she knew Whitehorse, he'd have something up his sleeve. He held his arms open as if to embrace her. She placed the megaphone on the ground and looked at John briefly, before walking towards Whitehorse. She stopped in the middle, hoping he would walk the rest of the way to meet her - which he did. He wrapped his arms around her, and she was suddenly overwhelmed - he was familiar, he was someone she knew, he was… packing. She felt the butt of the pistol under his shirt. Shit.
She stepped from his embrace and tapped her foot once, indicating to John he had a weapon, before smiling at Whitehorse. "Sheriff, I've come to you, with John, to implore you to reconsider joining us at the Project at Eden's Gate," she said, hoping she sounded confident and sincere. She still thought of him as her superior, as someone to guide her. She didn't want to make him her enemy. "What they're doing… Sir, I know from the outside it looks bad, but I've spent a lot of time with people from the community they've built. They're good people. Kind people. And with the growing tensions between us and some of the other global superpowers, what they're trying to achieve actually makes sense. I promise you, if you join the Project… if you join us, you and the other Resistance members will not be harmed."
"Dep, no!" Whitehorse remarked. "Please, please tell me you haven't converted to their side!"
John spoke then from behind her - he hadn't approached them and was still standing in the same place, his hands clasped behind his back. "I promise you, Sheriff. Join us and you can find happiness. Just as the Deputy has."
Mercy turned to look at John and started to smile at him when Whitehorse grabbed her, holding her around the waist and putting his pistol to her temple. "No way in hell are you getting my people, and I won't let you corrupt this young woman!" Whitehorse shouted. The other Resistance members drew firearms too and pointed them at John and his team.
"Sheriff please," she said through gritted teeth, trying to remain calm. "I haven't been corrupted, I'm here because-" she faltered. Because I've been told to. "Because I want to be here. I've been helping people find happiness and safety within the community the Project has built. And I want you to be safe, and happy. Aren't you tired of fighting?"
The Project's guards raised their rifles in defence. John held up his hands. "Please, Sheriff, there's no reason we can't resolve this peacefully."
"Peacefully? You sadistic fucker, I'll have your head mounted in my office!" With that, Whitehorse fired at John, hitting him in the stomach.
Someone was screaming, and it took her a minute to realise she was screaming. "Hudson told me she'd seen you with him, coming out of the church in Fall's End hand in hand!" Whitehorse spat, struggling to drag her back to the prison. "I won't let him take you from your people!"
She wasn't sure what was happening, all she could see was John lying on the ground, his hands on his stomach. Brother James was standing in front of him, firing back at the Resistance. Any doubts she'd been having about which side she should be on were pushed from her mind at that moment. The only thing she knew was she needed to get to John. Whitehorse was still trying to drag her backwards, his head bowed in concentration. She kicked back, her heel connecting with his leg, before knocking her head back into his face, hitting him in the nose. This forced him to release her and she bolted towards the Project's guards, ducking low and diving behind a concrete barrier. She caught Brother James' eye and nodded.
"Push forward!" he yelled, and the Project guards started to slowly advance. The two immediately in front of her got close enough that she could start crawling behind their legs and start making her way towards John. Why couldn't I wear my god damn jeans today? she thought as she pushed along the hot ground, stones scratching her bare legs and digging into her skin. She was so close to him, just a little further…
"Mercy!" Whitehorse called. "Goddamnit girl, come here!"
She looked to her right to see him charging towards her. More Resistance members had come out of the prison and were fighting the Project guards. Brother James stepped in front of her, rifle aimed at Whitehorse. "Don't kill him!" she shouted.
Brother James fired a few warning shots that landed at Whitehorse's feet, making him stop, before he had to turn his attention to gunfire to his left. She scrambled to John, kneeling in front of him, trying to shield his body from the Resistance.
"No," she said, placing her hands on his stomach, repositioning his hands over the entry wound. "Don't you fucking dare. Keep holding that there." She struggled to pull his pistol from its holster and he stared at her as she checked it was loaded. When she met his gaze, she saw something there she'd never seen before - fear.
"Gonna end it for me now?" he asked shakily, the ghost of a smile on his lips.
"Shut up." Mercy turned her head to quickly survey the area. Of the twenty guards that had accompanied them, two had fallen. Whitehorse was still trying to approach her, blood running from his nose. She raised John's pistol and shot Whitehorse in the shin to prevent him from coming closer. He fell immediately. "I'm sorry," she muttered sadly as she stood up, dragging John with her towards one of the convoy trucks. Shots whizzed past her head, shattering the windscreen and rear window of the truck.
Brother James appeared at her side and helped her carry John the rest of the way to the car. He brushed as much glass as he could off the back seat before helping her hoist John up onto it. As she jumped into the driver's seat, Brother James hopped onto the mounted gun in the tray. She floored the accelerator and sped away from the prison.
"Tell me where to go!" she yelled. "Now, John!"
"Joseph… Joseph's compound." he coughed.
She watched him in the rearview mirror. It looked like he was slipping in and out of consciousness. "John, stay awake." She reached around and hit him in the knee. "Awake!"
She struggled to keep the car on the road and narrowly avoided hitting a couple on a quad bike. Joseph's compound wasn't that far away, right?
"Follow the road, and turn right at Lorna's Truck Stop!" Brother James shouted. She nodded once and kept driving.
To try and distract herself from the panic bubbling up in her chest, she sang along to the radio.
"In the west shall rise, a sinister creed. The rich will get what they want, the poor will lose what they need…"
She looked at John in the mirror again. His eyes were closed, and his chest rose and fell quickly.
"Oh Lord, the Great Collapse, won't be our end. When the world falls into the flames, we will rise again."
"Follow through and turn left just before Hollyhock Saloon." Brother James yelled.
John coughed from the back seat. "Keep singing," he said weakly. "It's nice."
She laughed. "I can't sing to save my life."
He met her gaze in the mirror. "Please."
She kept singing to the songs on the radio, her eyes darting nervously between the road and the mirror, making sure he was still breathing. By the time she reached the compound, John had passed out, and the back seat of the truck was covered in blood. Brother James helped her pull him from the truck and carry him to Joseph's church. Joseph was kneeling on the floor at the back of the room, arms raised, the tattoos and scars on his back in full view. He turned towards them when the doors opened and looked from her, covered in blood, to John, dripping blood onto the church floor.
He motioned for them to lay John down before the altar. "I will fetch our doctor," he said gently, sweeping from the church. His face gave nothing away. He didn't even look concerned.
Mercy dropped to her knees next to John's head, Brother James standing behind her. "Fuck you," she whispered to John, watching his chest rise and fall weakly. "Fuck you for bringing me here, and fuck you for making me-"
"Deputy, come back child, and let the doctor through." Joseph said softly from behind her. She scrambled to her feet and allowed him to lead her from the church as three people closed in on John.