The whole world had seemed to stop as Serena could here the heart-breaking sound that was her lover's heart stopping. The tears wouldn't stop falling she couldn't move as she felt like she had been nailed to the floor. Shouting could be heard as her friends and colleagues were fighting so hard to keep her alive it was her fault that she was bleeding to death if she didn't flinch so much when Bernie coughed then she wouldn't of cut into the wrong place and she wouldn't of cut whatever she did she would still be alive now if it weren't for her.

Serena still had the scalpel in hand she sat there looking at it willing it to take her too she knew all the places in which she could cut and bleed within seconds but she didn't want to kill herself Bernie would never forgive her well what could Bernie do she was basically dead now anyway she had killed her. Her hand was now shaking uncontrollably as she looked at this sharp piece of metal and really thought about what was the point if her Bernie was gone she could never live with herself if she known she was the one to kill her. She moved her had so the scalpel was now mere millimetres from her wrist she just let it hoover there for what felt like hours when eventually she threw it away and again sat there and just cried.

It was only was the sobs had become quite that she heard it the silence everything on the other side of the door she now sat near was silent. Her mind flooded with images of Bernie's lifeless body lying on the cold metal slab and Hansen ric and raf all stood around her saying there goodbyes. Please she thought she has to have survived this she had too she was her big macho army medic.

As Serena was lost in thought she didn't notice that the door had opened and now Fletch stood there with a solemn look on his face. When she could feel someone looking at her she turned around and saw the look on his face. And saw the now blood soaked scrubs.

"no please she can't be please Fletch don't tell me I killed her didn't I oh god I killed her how can I live without her I love her to much to be without her oh..." She started to sob uncontrollably again.

Fletch tried to speak but she wasn't listen he got down and hugged her trying to get her to calm down.

"Serena listen, Serena listen to me" she didn't look at him she couldn't she didn't want him to say it she couldn't hear it.

"she's alive Serena she's not dead please stop crying the bleeding is under control Hansen is just closing her up I just came to tell you that she's okay there was just a minor complication we had to sedate her and put her in a medically induced coma as she started to be able to feel what we were doing. Now I'm not going to lie we did lose her for a while but it was doctor burrows that saved the day she was the one who finally located the bleed everyone had given up as we had shocked her 8 times and we couldn't find the tear but she wouldn't give up on Bernie so you should thank her." He stopped for a breath and hugged Serena tight.

"she will be going on the AAU as well we all know that's where she will get the best treatment we are just waiting on her being closed up then she will be transported down the stairs and to AAU."

"Thank you fletch thank you I'm sorry for getting so emotional I just let my brain take over and seeing you covered in blood I just thought the worst. You know I cant live without her so the thought well it drove me crazy."

"Its alright Serena I didn't mean to look so well when I saw you I guess my face dropped but listen it wasn't you fault the bleed you know if it was anyone and the patient suddenly jolted then the same thing would of happened so don't blame you self non of this is your fault." He said as he hugged her trying to reassure her that it wasn't your fault.

"it was my fault she wouldn't even be need surgery if it wasn't for me I was the one who pushed her on the wall" when she said this he gave her a quizzing look.

"I guess everyone is going to want to know what happened you see she had just well gotten me away from the edge and we were talking about things and then we kissed and well let's say got caught up in the moment and we were looking for a wall and I didn't check if it was save I just pushed her on it and then before I knew it there was a metal pole sticking out of her so it is my fault."

Fletched looked stunned before he turned and smiled.

"so all this just so you two could have a quicke on the roof you should of just gone to the on call room" when he said this they both laughed.

"but seriously its not your fault and I'm pretty sure Bernie doesn't blame you either how about we got back out there and see what's going on." Serena nodded and he stood up pulling Serena with him she grabbed his hand as they walked through the door he gave her a reassuring squeeze as they were soon out on the cold roof and everyone turned to look at them.

Serena saw her Bernie lying on the table looking peaceful like she was sleeping she walked over and stoked her head and gave her kiss on the forehead "I'm so sorry darling ill never leave you again I love you with all my heart."