Connor, as was still his habit, apparently, was asleep and snoring in less than a minute. I very slowly got out of bed and retreated to my bedroom. I opened the closet and withdrew a red kimono-type robe that I had bought when it came into the store a few years back. Around the time that I had been trying to add spice back into my marriage. Phil had been less than impressed, but it had managed to make me feel attractive, even if he didn't see it, and tonight was certainly a night to feel attractive, wanted. Loved. Tying the belt tight around my middle, I tiptoed downstairs to find Murphy.

I found him sitting with his back to my couch, staring into the cold fireplace, a beer on the floor next to him, a cigarette in one hand, and Seth's picture in the other. "Murph?" I asked, as I came around the corner. His head snapped around to me and looked me up and down, hungrily. I smiled a little, dropping my eyes. When I met his gaze again, he was looking at my face. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to leave you down here alone for that long."

"Did Connor get his shower, then?" I smirked and looked away. He grinned and nodded, "Thought what I was hearing didn't have anything to do with getting clean."

"We got pretty clean that morning at the flat in the shower, Murphy, if you remember," I said, settling down on the floor beside him.

He grinned, "I remember."

"What are you doing, sitting in here in the dark?"

He shrugged. "Didn't know what your normal schedule was, didn't want to go flippin on a bunch o' lights and attract attention from yer neighbors."

I nodded, "Good point."

"I was goin ta start a fire…"

I looked up at him, "Could you?"

"O'course, I could, girl. If ye want."

"Great," I said, standing and clearing pictures off the mantelpiece. I knew in theory it was perfectly safe to leave them up there, but it had always made me nervous.

"Ye've had the chimney swept this season, aye?" Murphy asked, gathering up a few hunks of wood from the holder beside the fireplace.

"Oh yeah, every year, now."

"Now?" he asked, his eyebrow arched.

I grinned, blushing, "Yeah, now. My first stint as Seth's den mom, the campout got cancelled cause of a freak snowstorm," I said as I placed all the removed pictures on a desk in the corner. "So I brought all the scouts here, and lit the fireplace to roast weenies and marshmallows?"

"Aye," Murphy said, his back to me, but I could hear the smile in his voice.

"…and I nearly burned the joint down."

His shoulders shook with suppressed laughter as he arranged the wood in the grate and set the kindling to smolder. It took him a second but when he started talking again there was no trace of laughter in his tone. "Yer old man doesn't light it?"

I shook my head. "Naw, not really."

"Shame," he said, standing and moving back to sit beside me where I sat in front of the couch."Keep ours lit all the time back home," he said as he held out his arm for me to cuddle to his chest. We both looked forward, watching the flames slowly growing. "Tell me about your boy," he said after a few moments.

I smiled. "I could go on and on. What do you want to know?"

"His name's Seth and he's almost 10. What's he like? What does he do?"

"Everything," I said, all puffed up with maternal pride. "He's very athletic. Loves to box, but he's still a fair hockey and baseball player. We had him in football for a year, but I was a nervous wreck, and I accidentally on purpose forgot to sign his permission form the following year and thank God he decided he was happier not playing. He likes to shoot zombies in video games. He's still young enough to think I'm cool. We watch horror movies together when his dad isn't around. He's smart as hell. And I love him more than I ever thought I could love another person in my life." He was quiet out of my sight. "How's that?"

"Yer a ma," he said, his voice wistful, almost…sad, I thought listening.

"That I am."

"I wasn't expectin' that," he said, in the same tone.

I tried to turn my head enough to see his face, but couldn't quite manage it, so I slid my head down his stomach, stretching out on my back, resting my head in his lap. I reached a hand up and touched his cheek. "You almost sound sad."

"A little," he said, honestly. "Not that you've got a son, girl, I'm thrilled that ye have a boy, just…I suppose, sad that I don't as well," he said, looking down at me. I got it. He wanted Seth to be his. I bit my lip.

"I can't apologize, Murph. I wouldn't trade him for anything."

He shook his head, looking back into the fire, taking my hand in his and kissing my palm. "I'd think a hell of a lot less of ye, if ye would, girl."

I smiled up at him. "Thanks," I said, as he looked back down at me. The firelight playing over the sharp angles of his face, the orange light giving his alabaster skin a healthy glow. "The pair of you never stopped mattering to me, Murph. My heart just kind of expanded to hold all of you."

"We've not been with any other women." I arched an eyebrow up at him. "Well, I mean, we've bedded other women, just haven't **been** with any others, not any that mattered as it were," he said as he laid his hand on the bare skin of my chest where the robe opened, his thumb stroking lightly. "And never both of us together. Not since you."

I smiled, turning my head to the fire. I didn't know how to respond to that. I was thinking 'Good.' But considering that I was a married mother, that seemed a little unfair, so I just shut up and didn't say anything. See how mature I've become in my old age?

"Ye've not changed, girl."

I laughed deep in my throat. "You've not looked close enough, Murphy."

"Looking now."

I turned my head to him and stared up at him. "Thank you for that." I said, touching his face.

He turned back to the fire again, and I did as well, tracing my fingers up and down the seams of his jeans as his thumb absently stroked my chest. Several silent minutes went by before he asked, "Why have we never fucked in front of a fire before?", his eyes roaming over my face, my hair, the bare skin of my arms and chest.

I laughed again, "We never had a fireplace before."

"Aye, I suppose so," he said, still staring. "What say ye come up here to me and we can change that?"