Chapter Ten—Old Demons and Ghosts

"Hey," I said, seeing Elliot.

"Oh hey—you're still wearing your work clothes?" I looked down; I hadn't realized.

"I figured," he muttered, and pulled out a bag from under his desk."Put these on," he threw a pair of dark Levi's at my face.

"You bought me jeans?" I asked, honored but totally confused.

He nodded. "Think of it as a 'Welcome to the Graveyard Shift' gift."

I smiled. "Thanks." He smiled, and turned on his heel towards the interrogation rooms. Olivia followed, and said, "Take your time."

"Why?" I asked, my mind racking the possible reasons why I could take my time. "You'll see." She said, answering my question.

Even though I was suspicious, I shrugged and quickly changed into my jeans. I looked at myself in the mirror—A pair of black high-heels, a black business jacket, and a blue blouse actually worked with my dark jeans. I smirked smugly, and walked to the interrogation rooms.

With every step I took, my heart pounded more fiercely. I didn't know why; it was as if my sixth sense was telling me to back out. Now.

I stepped into the group of Munch, Cragen, Elliot, and Olivia. "And we're back," I joked.

They all smiled, but all of their expressions were weak. Heavy bags hung under each of their eyes, and they all looked like they were about to topple over from exhaustion. Come to think of it, I wanted to do that, too.

"Alec, we got Joshua Saradin." I looked into the interrogation room, and saw Joshua Saradin. He looked like he did 14 years ago…

My heart stopped, and I snapped my head to Cragen. "Where did you find him?" I asked; the question came out harsher than I had meant it to be.

"Manhattan." He replied, not offended by the tone in my voice.

"So, is it Alec and I again?" Asked Olivia, watching my reactions carefully.

Cragen nodded. "I'll send Elliot in if you guys need anything."

I stared back through the window, and was thankful for the magical mechanism that made this window one-way. Olivia walked in first, giving me a quick glance backward, and I followed her.

He looked up, and at first his face expression remained blank, maybe with a little bit more annoyance. But when he saw me, and his brain registered that it was me, his face lit up. It made me almost sick to my stomach.

I leaned against the wall, trying to stay as far away from him as humanly possible.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't Alec Bay? You haven't changed a bit, maybe just gotten a little bit hotter." He gave me a lust-filled look. I glared at him, and caught Olivia looking at him with the same expression as mine.

"Mr. Saradin, please don't hit on our detective. We're not a dating service." Olivia spat.

Josh crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair. He gave Olivia a smug look, and said, "Why not? We have a…history, together." He licked his lips.

"You bastard," I muttered, looking up at him. I so badly wanted to lunge across the table and beat him unconscious… but I pushed the feeling aside. Momentarily.

"Admit it, Alec, you were all over me that night. You couldn't get enough of me—"

I slammed my hands on the table, hunching over. "YOU RAPED ME!" I yelled, at the top of my lungs. "IT WAS AGAINST MY OWN FRICKEN WILL! AND YOU CALL THAT 'ALL OVER YOU'?!" I lunged for him, but Olivia caught me right before I could throw a punch at his nose.

I was panting, as Olivia had her arms locked around my torso to keep me from attacking Josh. Josh was standing a few paces away from the table. He was smiling, deviously. "Still got some fight in you, don't ya? One thing I liked about you."

"Shut the hell up," Olivia said to Josh, darkly. "Do you want to go on with this?" She whispered in my ear. Before I could respond, she said, "And if you say no, it doesn't mean you're weak. You faced him, and that's pretty damn strong. You've got nothing to prove—we believe you." I thought about this. "I can't do this." I whispered back to her. She nodded, and I walked out of the interrogation room.

"I guess you're up, Elliot." Cragen said to Elliot. He nodded, and then said before he walked out, "You okay?"

"I'm fine," I lied, keep my eyes glued to the doorstopper of the door leading into the interrogation room. He nodded, and headed in to question Joshua.

I crossed my arms, and stood next to Munch and Cragen. "Sorry, guys."

They both shook their heads. "You have every right to have reacted the way you did." Munch said.

"Don't worry. You won't have to do that again." Cragen added. I nodded my thanks, and Munch wrapped an arm around me. It wasn't until then that I noticed that I was shaking.

"So, you get why you're here?" Asked Elliot, sitting backwards in a chair next to Josh. Olivia sat across.

"Because you morons have reason to believe that I raped two seven year old girls."

"And killed one of them." Elliot said, sharply.

"Now you get to see what HIS temper is like," Munch said to me. I nodded.

"And what makes you think that?" Josh spat.

"We found your DNA in Alessandra Groxton." Olivia said. Her voice was calm but her eyes stayed as dark as pebbles.

"The one you didn't kill." Elliot said, angrily.

"How? I have a clean record, so therefore I'm not in the system." Josh said, looking smug.

"We hooked up your DNA to your father. And when you hook two up together that are related, we can get an I.D." Olivia said, coolly.

"Well see, that's the funny thing. When we hooked up your DNA with—"

"My father died when I was two." Josh said, firmly.

"Oh, no, he didn't. He's the father of the one you didn't kill. And we got DNA from him, and then the DNA from the rape kit from you, and your alleles matched. Because, at first we thought it was him who raped his own daughter. But when we realized that it was you—"

"My father is dead." Josh said, louder.

"He's not, we met him." Olivia said. She held up a picture. I smiled when I saw Josh realize what he had done.

"So… if I were the rapist, then I would have had sex… with my sister?"

Elliot nodded. "Yup."

Just then, Josh threw up all over the table. Olivia quickly stood up and backed away. Josh finally stammered, "I did it. I did it. I raped both of them."

Elliot suddenly shoved Josh against a wall. "And Detective Bay?"

Josh nodded. "Her too."

Elliot cuffed Josh and read him his rights, and Cragen helped Elliot lead Josh out of the area. Olivia walked over and stood next to me. She rubbed my back, and Munch's arm remained around my shoulder. I stood there, staring at an empty interrogation room. I had faced one of my biggest fears, and he admitted he raped me. But why didn't I feel happy?