Chapter 11

"What took you so long?" was the first thing that Sayid asked Jack and Kate when they came back from the bathroom. He saw the girls, Shannon and Claire whispering to each other and then going towards the bathroom as well. So he suspected something must have happened.

"We saw Sun and we kinda lost track of time." Kate lied through her teeth making Jack smile at her. She blushed and quickly sat down at her seat.

"Where is Claire? And Shannon?" Jack asked as he realized that there was a peculiar silence at the table. When Shannon and Claire were at the same table no one could prevent them from talking extremelly loud and without stop. So the sudden silence indicated that they had gone somewhere.

"Uh… I think… I think they… There they are!" exclaimed Sayid, relieved that he hadn't had to lie for them.

Shannon and Claire reached the table in a completely serious manner. They didn't talk or smile or even look at them. They packed their bags, took the rest of their food and started heading towards another empty table.

"Hey" Jack said waving his hands in front of them as if to show them that he was there. By the way they were acting, it seemed like they didn't see them. Like they were invisible.

"Shan?" Kate asked clearly confused about her friend's behaviour.

But they didn't say a thing. They turned their backs at them and went to sit at the other table leaving their friends stunned and buffled by their behaviour.

"What the hell?" Jack asked looking at his friends, Sayid, Charlie and Boone, searching for the reason that Shannon and Claire were acting this way.

Sayid stood up and went to their table to investigate. He bent over them and said something to them. They whispered something to him and then continued eating their food. Sayid came back to the other's table completely confused.

"They said that they are not talking to you two" he said pointing at Kate and Jack.

"What? Why?" Kate asked

"They didn't say" Sayid answered. "But they looked really pissed off."

Jack and Kate turned to look at each other completely unaware of the reason their friends were mad at them. They started to head towards their table to find out what had happened but Sayid stopped them immediately.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you" he warned in a firm voice. "They seem really really really I mean really mad"

"Well I'm all in for apologizing to them but I don't know what the hell we did to them!" Jack exclaimed exasperated.

"Well I'd say leave it for now and you can talk to them when they have calmed now" Sayid suggested.

"Is it so bad?" Kate asked in a worried tone.

"Well… remember the Ana-Lucia incident?" Sayid asked and Kate winced.

"Yeah" she said carefully.

"Much worse" Sayid said while Charlie whistled.

At that precise moment the bell rang so they had to go back to their classes. Shannon and Claire stood up, took their bags and left without looking at them whatsoever. Jack shook his head not really understanding the whole thing and headed for his class, followed by the others.

After school…

"I don't get it. I really don't!" Kate sighed while sitting on Jack's bed.

When they were dismissed Kate took upon Jack's offer and decided that going to Jack's place wouldn't be such a bad idea. Besides she couldn't really deny him anything so it would be pointless to even try to.

"Me neither. But I won't bother unless they come to talk to us. We didn't do anything to them so as far as I'm concerned we have nothing to apologize for." Jack said firmly.

"Well, we do lie to them" Kate said in a small voice.

"Yeah but they don't know it so I don't really get why we should apologize to them without even knowing what we did to upset them in the first place." Jack sighed and sat next to Kate.

They were silent for a while, each lost in their thoughts.

"Do you wast something to drink?" Jack asked suddenly in a gentle voice, making Kate look at him.

"No, thanks" she replied smiling at him.

"Something to eat?" Jack pressed wanting to make her as comfortable as possible.

"No Jack, I'm fine" Kate chuckled at his worried tone.

"Okay then" Jack said and watched as she licked her lips in a way that made him go weak in the knees. He reached at her and grabbing gentle but firmly her neck he took her lips in his mouth, silencing her gasp of surprise.

Slowly and steadily the kiss progressed. He tore her lips open with his tongue and explored her mouth eliciting a low moan out of her. He continued the slow movements of his mouth while he started caressing her back and arms. She didn't waste any time, and by the time she was bold enough, she inserted her hands inside his shirt and started travelling them up and down his stomach and torso.

He groaned and fell down on the bed with her following on top of him. They didn't stop kissing but instead they intestified the movement of their tongues as they deepened the kiss. The only sounds that could be heard in the room were their soft moans and whimpers coming out of their mouths.

Jack's hands started travelling inside Kate's shirt, playing with the clasp of her bra. Before he could procceed Kate lifted herself off of him making Jack worry that he had gone too far.

"I'm sorry.. I didn't…" he started in a frantic voice but he stopped abrubtly when he saw Kate taking off her shirt, as quickly as possible and hovering over him once again. Smiling at how cute he looked when he started to apologize she kissed him hard and full on the mouth.

Letting out a growl he grabbed her by the waist and kissed her back with the same force and passion that she did. Neither of them understood how it was possible that two best friends like them could want each other that badly. It was inexplicable but urgent at the same time.

Wasting no time, Kate grabbed the hem of Jack's shirt and quickly pulled it over his head leaving him shirtless much to Kate's pleasure. Running her hands over his slightly hair-covered chest she bent down and started nibbling at his neck going lower and lower.

He gasped and moaned at the pleasurable sensation and once again thought that she was extremelly good at this. Feeling her lips working now on his andomen he wasn't really capable of thinking straight but once she reached his pants and started unbuttoning them he realized that this was getting way out of hand.

"Kate.. wait wait wait" he said lifting her up and quickly buttoning his pants.

"What? Did I hurt you?" a completely worried Kate asked him making chuckle at her innosence.

"No no you didn't. It's just that… we kinda… we really need to talk before we… before we do… before we do whatever it is we're doing." he said blushing furiously at his stupidiness.

Kate just smiled and went to work on his neck.

"Well" she said while nibbling at his neck "I thought we were done talking"

Jack had to make a great effort to stop her cause all his body was screaming not to. But he knew that they couldn't keep doing this. Not like this.

"Kate stop" he said lifting her head up and making her look at him.

"I thought… I thought we had decided to keep this thing between us as friends with benefits" she said in a small voice.

"I know but… I can't see you like that Kate"

The moment he said it he regretted it immediately.

Tears started forming in Kate's eyes and her lower lip began trembling.

"No no no Kate I didn't…" he started wanting nothing more than to take it back but she was already up dressing up, too embarassed to look up at him.

"I'm sorry I was such a fool to believe that…" she said but couldn't continue as tears started streaming down her face and sobs overtook her body.

"Kate please I didn't mean it like that I just wanted to…"

But he didn't manage to explain to her cause she had already taken off running.

"Fuck!!!" Jack yelled to himself as he hit the door with all his strength.

What he really wanted to tell her was that he couldn't see her ONLY as a friend with benefits. He wanted more. He wanted all of her. Not just some stupid hook-ups and one night stands. He was in love with her and he finally got the courage to tell her. But instead he screwed up even the little he had with her. "Well done Jack" he thought as he sank to his bed and burried his face in the pillow letting the tears of frustration pour down his face.

Tears continued to stream down her face as she ran back to her home. She couldn't believe she had been so stupid to believe that the Great Jack Shepard would take an interest in her. He was the God of school for God's sake. How the hell did she let herself believe that it could actually happen?

Finally she reached her home and she immediately spotted someone sitting on the doorstep.

"Sawyer?" she said surprised.

"Hey" he said quickly standing up." I'm here for our date. I knocked but nobody answered so I figured I should wait for a while in case you showed up" he said in a hurried tone, clearly embarassed.

"Oh my God! I completely forgot about it! I'm so sorry" she apologized to him while opening the door. " Come in" she said.

He entered and looked around for a moment and then added " Nice place you have here"

"Thanks" she smiled " Let's go upstairs" she said.

Once they were in her room he sat down on her bed and looked at her.

"I'm sorry I forgot. I just had to…" she trailed off remembering the previous events with Jack.

"It's okay Freckles. You're worth the waiting" he said cheeckily showing her the best of his smiles.

She laughed at his obvious attempt to impress her but suddenly her laugh turned into a sob. And the tears once again started falling from her eyes.

"Hey" Sawyer said standing up and pulling her to his chest.

"I'm sorry" she said between her sobs "I just had a rough day" she said while soaking his shirt with her tears.

"It's okay" he said and pulled her with him towards her bed. He layed down and pulled her to him trying to calm her down. After a while she cried herself to sleep and Sawer was left watching over her.

"Kate? Kate wake up! Kate!" Sawyer tried to wake her up.

She finally opened her eyes and looked at him. Apparently she had fallen asleep while crying in his arms. 'God, can this day become any more embarassing?' she thought to herself.

"Someone's on the door." he said and that's when she heard the bangs on the door.

"Oh" she said and went downstairs immediatelly, with Sawyer right behind her.

Opening the door she revealed a furious Shannon and an even more furious Claire.

"You out!" Shannon ordered pointing at Sawyer.

"What the…" Kate began but was interrupted.

"YOU SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN!" Shannon yelled pointing at Kate not leaving any room for argument.

They all complied to the orders given, and now Kate was sitting on the sofa in the living-room with Claire and Shannon sitting right opposite to her.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Claire asked exasperated.

"With me? What the hell is wrong with YOU?" Kate demanded not really understanding what was going on.

"WE are fine. YOU have lost your mind!" Shannon yelled.

"Would you care to explain to me what is going on here cause I'm totally lost?" Kate yelled back.

"Sure thing." Shannon said. "Would you care to explain to us what the hell you were doing sleeping with Sawyer?"

Silence.

"What?" Kate asked completely baffled.

"You heard me" Shannon said.

"Okay. First, I did't sleep, like have sex with Sawyer. Second how the hell do you know?" Kate asked

"He saw you" Claire said in a sad tone.

"What? Who?"

"Jack" Claire told her.

Kate was silent for a minute, trying to digest all of the information and suddenly spoke.

"And what is his problem anyway?" she said. Not too long ago he told her that he couldn't see her in that way and now all of a sudden he was jealous of Sawyer? She was a free woman for the love of God. She could do whatever she wanted with whomever she wanted.

"Cut the crap Kate! We saw you at school. Kissing and screwing against the wall!" Claire said exasperated.

"Not exactly screwing" Shannon corrected getting a glare from Claire.

"So what?" Kate said. "It's not like we're together!" she said trying to hold back the tears that were starting to fall.

"Yeah he told us all about this friendship with benefits thing" Shannon said.

"Did he also tell you that he can't see me in "that" way?" she said having enough of it and finally letting the tears fall.

"Yes Kate but you didn't let him explain…" Claire started but got interrupted.

"Explain me what, Claire? That I'm not good enough for him? That Jack Shepard is too good for a white trash from Iowa like Kate Austen?" Kate yelled while sobbing hysterically. "To explain what?" she screamed.

"That he's in love with you" Claire said in a whisper but still Kate heard it.

"How can he possibly be in l…" Kate started to object but Claire didn't let her.

"He loves you Kate. He's been in love with you since the day you hugged him in the sixth grade for standing up for you in front of the teacher. He's being in love with you for more than 6 years, Kate." Claire explained sadly, remembering all the times Jack had come to her asking to make it go away, help him get over her but he never succeeded.

Kate was left stunned and unable to talk. Gathering her sttrengths she finally spoke

"Why didn't he say anything?" she whispered.

"Because he was scared Kate." Shannon said watching as her friend was about to break down. Again.

"Today, all he wanted to say was that he didn't want you to be that girl, the friend with benefits for him, because he wanted more. He was gonna tell you everything we're telling you now and he was gonna ask you to be his girlfriend." Claire said feeling really bad for them.

"Corny but cute" Shannon added getting another glare from Claire.

"How did he…? How did he…" Kate tried to ask but her light sobs didn't let her finish.

"From the tree. The one he used to climb into your room when you were grounded." Claire explained

Kate gulped and burried her face in her hands wanting to die right there and then. He loved her. He loved her and she just broke his heart.

"Sweetie?" Shannon said gently moving her hands away from her face. "It's okay"

"No, it's not" she whispered.

"Then go to him and straighten this thing out" Shannon said.

Kate looked at her and for once in her life decided to do what it was in her heart.

"Okay" she said and quickly went to pick up her keys and left, leaving Claire and Shannon praying to God to make this all right.

She reached his place in record time and knocked several times at the door but no one answered. She figured he didn't want anyone to see him so she decided to take matters in her own hands.

She went at the back of his house, walking through the Shepards' garden, where his room's window was. She imeddiatelly spotted him sitting on his bed looking at nothing, having a sad look on his face.

"Jack!" she yelled making him jump in a way that normally would make her laugh and tease him. But now was not the time.

He turned to look at her surprised and then a look of hurt took over his face. He didn't say anything just looked at her, until she decided to speak.

"I'm sorry" she said in a low voice but loud enough for him to hear it. "I didn't mean to…"

"Save it, Kate" he said in an angry tone, shaking his head. "Just go home"

"No Jack I won't till you listen to me!" she yelled.

"I'm done listening to you Kate!" he yelled back at her. "I'm sick of feeling like this, I'm sick of everything I'M SICK OF YOU!!!" he screamed both angry and hurt.

"Jack please…" she begged him with tears falling down her face. "Nothing happened between me and Sawyer, I swear! I just…"

"I don't care anymore Kate! I just.. I'm done with this" he said pointing them, and turning his back to her.

"Jack" she said now sobbing slightly."I'm so sorry. I love you Jack please…" she pleaded with him.

"He could hear her sobs and pleads but he was too hurt to feel sorry for her. Too hurt to feel anything than anger for her. Too hurt to forgive her.

So he just closed the window.

A/N:Ahhh Jangst… Please don't hate me for it, I promise it'll get better!

And as for the smut, the majority of you decided no graphic sex so I'll stick with it. And to tell you the truth I wasn't really comfortable about it either… I'm all in for reading it but writing it is another issue… I guess I'm too shy…:-) Anyway I'm gonna apologize once again for the delay but I have my school exams now so it's really hard to find the time to write. I'll try my best to update sooner next time…