CHAPTER 11

A/N: Thanks for all your reviews, folks! Glad to see you're enjoying the trip!

Romulus Black: Thanks a lot for pointing out that one should sit during a nosebleed – Harry's horizontal position has been corrected in the previous chapters :-)

HP Girl 28: Snape knows that Harry is not spoilt, but he doesn't want to acknowledge that Harry is not who he thinks, or rather, who he WANTS to think he is.

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The next two months were excruciatingly difficult. Harry was still not fast enough when it came to gaining access to Snape's thoughts, and there was a lesson where he had to give up because of sheer exhaustion. He sometimes got nosebleeds after Legilimency and sometimes he didn't.

Relief came in the shape of Ginny and Luna's presence and turned to joy when the three of them saw Hermione and Ron in Hogsmeade. Hagrid had returned (without Madame Maxime, however) from negotiations and contracts with giants. The end of the war didn't mean that making allies could stop or be put on hold. Dark wizards and witches, if not Death Eaters, were on the run, as were dark creatures, among them several Dementors. The greeting between Hagrid and Harry had been tearful and wonderful, with Fang barking suspiciously at Harry's mind-bond quill. Otherwise, however, Harry was slogging over Snape's assignments and suffering from nightmares. Snape was definitely cruel to Harry, more so now that the term had started. It was a degrading, humiliating and depressing feeling. It robbed Harry's sleep and, what was worse, seemed to be sapping his magical powers. His spells seemed weaker; he would have to repeat his messages to his quill sometimes; and when he finally failed altogether to break into Snape's mind, Snape shouted at him, saying that he was useless and a waste of time and to get out of his sight. Harry burst into tears as the door slammed behind him.

I can't go on for any longer, he wrote in his diary. I can't. I am trying and trying. I am so tired. Why are you doing this to me, Severus Snape? Why, you bastard? I must go on. Snape, Dumbledore and my friends and parents didn't sacrifice so much to save my life and then have me throw it all away after all these years. No, I must go on.

Finally, near the middle of December, he managed, with a supreme effort, to enter Snape's mind, but had to retreat because of the pain which shot through his head and made his nose bleed.

"You may sit down for a few minutes until you feel better," Snape said harshly, nodding at the couch and handing Harry the now standard towel. Harry sat down, then changed his position to lying on his side so that the blood could still flow out. The towels Snape gave him were always clean, soft and fluffy; and a minute later, he was asleep. Snape, who had had his back turned towards Harry, now approached the sleeping shape. He spent a long time gazing at Harry, absorbed in the peaceful expression on his face, in his relaxed fingers, in the shape of his body, the casual dark-blue jeans and black t-shirt. He sometimes wore robes and at other times he didn't. A long slender index finger touched Harry's cheek, and the gesture was like a caress. The Potions Master walked back to his desk and began to grade papers. It was eleven o'clock at night by the time he had finished, and he decided it was time to wake Harry. As if in accordance with his thoughts, a sudden cough sounded from the couch. It was followed by another, and then by a violent retching. Snape stood up immediately.

Harry was writhing wildly from side to side. The smell and taste of blood were in his nose and mouth. He coughed and gagged again. An arm surrounded his shoulders, supporting him as he sat up. A faint glow of light flooded the room. The Potions Master was looking down at him with probing black eyes, a slender hand holding a fresh towel underneath his nose.

Harry went into another coughing spasm and leant his head against Snape's chest. This time, too, Snape stiffened, but he did not protest or shove him away. The towel was soaked within minutes, and the blood was positively gushing out Harry's nose. His face became horribly white. Snape caught Harry as he fainted backwards into his arms. He, too, had become paler than he already was.

"Potter…Harry…" he said softly. When there was no response, he lifted him into his arms and left his office in quest of the hospital wing. The young man's face was deathly pale and the crimson blood stood out vividly, besmearing his parted lips, front teeth and chin.

In the hospital wing, Madam Pomfrey examined him as he lay limply on his side.

"The nosebleeds are typically stress-related – I can't detect anything wrong with his blood pressure except that it is a bit low, which is normal after such a heavy nosebleed. You are teaching him Telepathy and specialised non-verbal spells, aren't you?" she said disapprovingly to Snape.

Snape nodded curtly.

"Legilimency. We haven't moved on to Telepathy as yet."

"It is mentioned that extreme mental magic can bring on these symptoms. Legilimency is one of them, Severus. He is not to do any strenuous activities for the next four weeks, at the very least. And that includes his lessons with you."

She gave Snape a cold glance.

"I'll just run a few additional tests to make sure he's fine."

"I believe there are tumours which can cause nosebleeds. Maybe Potter is lucky enough to have one," a sixth-year Slytherin who had broken his leg during Quidditch practice said loudly. He was lying a few beds away from Harry's and obviously eavesdropping.

"Thirty points from Slytherin, Carter," Snape said, striding up to the Slytherin's bed. "Another remark like that, and I will deduct forty points. Keep your ears and remarks to yourself."

Pomfrey stared. She had never witnessed Snape either taking points off his own house or rebuking one of his own students. The Slytherin gulped. Snape returned.

"How often will he keep on having the nosebleeds?" he asked the matron.

"Until Legilimency becomes something natural to him, something he can do with less effort. Nosebleeds like he had now can be dangerous, especially if he starts passing out."

Pomfrey bent over Harry. She took her wand and passed it over the youth's face and body.

"Has he been having difficulties performing magic in his lessons?"

Snape nodded.

"Severus, he is completely exhausted," she said worriedly, "he really has to stop all this for at least a month. He is so tired that it is having a negative effect on his magic. It is sapping his powers. He should have had some time to himself after the war. Instead, he had to take lessons with you as soon as he was healed."

Snape stared down at Harry.

Madam Pomfrey watched as he drew up a chair next to Harry. He refused to leave his bedside until Albus Dumbledore entered the room, his blue eyes resting upon his Potions Master and Harry. He loved Snape like a son and Harry like a grandson. Dumbledore would have liked having children, but he had been so busy saving the world from dangerous characters that there had never been time for a family.

Snape gave him an unfathomable gaze.

Dumbledore put his hand on Snape's shoulder for a moment before stooping over Harry and touching his face gently.

"This is more than just stress and exhaustion, Severus. I can feel a lot of pain and sorrow in him."

Snape subconsciously passed his palm over the branded mark burnt forever in his left forearm.

"Is it depression?" he asked abruptly.

"Resulting from the trauma of loss in his life. Harry has had to endure more deaths and losses than most people of his age."

The blue eyes looked into Snape's black ones.

"And that is what links you to Harry, Severus."

Snape was silent.

Dumbledore sighed.

"Were you harsh to him during your lessons?"

No reaction from Snape except for a slight bowing of his head.

"Did I make a mistake again, Severus? Is it really too late? Do you hate him so much? Maybe I was too optimistic. Maybe too much has been broken between you two and can no longer be repaired."

Snape remained silent.

"Look at me, Severus," Dumbledore said gently. The Potions Master obeyed.

"It is only for one year, Severus. Till the holidays. Should Harry be made the Defence Against The Dark Arts teacher, you can still avoid each other. But for now, you can't avoid each other. He needs your help, Severus, if he wants to stay at Hogwarts and become a teacher. It is his home. And…you need his help as well."

Snape stared at the wise wizard incredulously.

"Please think of all I have told you about Harry Potter, Severus. You will continue teaching Harry after his four weeks of recovery have passed. The Christmas holidays will be over by then. And we definitely all need a holiday. I think it is time you went to bed, Severus."

"Good night, Headmaster."

"Albus. Good night, Severus."

Snape turned and left the hospital wing. Dumbledore placed his hand on Harry's forehead.

"Severus needs you, Harry, just as you need him. But now you need time for yourself. Time to grieve after all you have suffered. Sleep now, my dear boy, and heal well. You are strong, and you are not alone."

He left.

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