I have nothing left to give
I have found the perfect end
You were made to make it hurt
Disappear into the dirt
Carry me to heaven's arms
Light the way and let me go
Take the time to take my breath
I will end where I began

A small sigh escaped the lips of Brooke Davis as she ran her finger along a single picture. It was of her and Peyton on Peyton's 15th birthday. The two girls looked so happy, their arms wrapped around each other, huge smiles planted on both of their faces as they made goofy faces at the camera. Brooke could still remember that day like it was yesterday but somehow it seemed like that was a lifetime ago. She no longer had Peyton to run to when something was wrong. She had no one to spend all night crying with when things got rough. They had been so through so much together and always pulled each other through. When Peyton's mother died Brooke was there for her, and when Brooke's parents decided to move halfway across the country Peyton was there for her. Peyton was the only one that had ever truly understood how much her parents neglecting her had eaten her up inside. Peyton was like a sister to her and they were destined to overcome anything that got in the way of their friendship. However, there was one obstacle that they could not overcome. That one single obstacle had torn the most beautiful friendship either of them had ever experienced apart, shattering it into a million pieces. That obstacle went by the name of Lucas Scott. Brooke was so glad that she had Lucas in her life and now that he was in it she couldn't imagine it without him but it still hurt that he had been the one to ruin her and Peyton's friendship. Looking at that single photograph made Brooke wish that she could go back in time to that day when they were 15. Back to when life was so much simpler and she didn't have to worry about a boy ruining her friendship with Peyton. Back to when she didn't have to hate herself and wish that she wasn't alive anymore. Brooke placed her perfectly manicured fingertips at the top of the photograph and tore it right down the middle. A single tear fell onto the picture as it split in half, resembling a broken friendship. Life really was a bitch.

Little did Brooke know on the opposite side of town the same thing was happening. Peyton Sawyer was browsing through some old pictures on her computer when she came across one of her and Brooke when they were only 15 years old. A small smile played on her lips as she stared at the picture with regret. Brooke was her best friend, her sister, the girl that had given her so much strength and she had ruined it. It wasn't until Lucas had come into the picture that their relationship had faltered. Lucas drove a wedge between the two friends and her stupid mistakes had caused a barrier in her and Brooke's friendship. She couldn't blame Lucas for ruining her friendship with Brooke because it takes two to cheat but Peyton knows that if Lucas had never came into their lives they would still be those smiling 15 year old girls from 3 years ago. Falling in love with Lucas Scott was the biggest mistake of her life because it had ruined her life and had ruined her best friend's life. Giving up on Lucas had been hard but Peyton knew that she could never be Brooke and she could never take Brooke's place in Lucas's heart. She was fighting a battle she was destined to lose because people that are meant to be together always find their way in the end. One last look at the picture was all it took for Peyton to realize that she had to do something. She had to make things right with Brooke.

Don't stop, make it pop
DJ, blow my speakers up
Tonight, Imma fight
till we see the sunlight
Tick tock, on the click
but the party don't stop

A horrible rendition of Ke$ha's hit song Tik Tok screeched from the other side of the door, causing a smile to grace Peyton Sawyer's lips. That was so like Brooke.

She cringed as the brunette hit a high note, a piercing sound echoing through the walls of Brooke's bedroom.

Peyton finally found the courage to lift her hand and twist the doorknob. She let out a small chuckle at the sight of Brooke lying on her bed, screeching the song.

"I see your vocals haven't gotten any better Davis," she smirked, receiving a glare in return.

"You're one to talk. If I remember correctly you did not do the foo fighters any justice," Brooke grumbled, getting up off her bed. "Who let you in here anyways?"

"I just let myself in. Nobody was home and I see you still don't lock your door," the blonde shrugged as if it were no big deal.

"Well if you can just let yourself in then why don't you just let yourself out?" Brooke suggested, jerking her thumb towards the door.

"Brooke. We need to talk," Peyton sighed, running a hand through her mess of blonde curls.

"No we don't. If I remember correctly I told you that this friendship was over and that you were dead to me," the brunette roared anger raging in her cold hazel eyes.

"Peyton do not think for a second that you can just come waltzing back into my life and expect everything to be fine again because they're not. Things are never going to be fine again."

"Well you forgave Lucas so why can't you forgive me?"

"That is different and you know it! Peyton, Lucas has been here for me when I needed him the most. Where the hell have you been? Oh, that's right you were chasing after Lucas instead of trying to fix our friendship!" the brunette shouted heatedly.

Peyton hung her head in shame. "I'm sorry Brooke. I was selfish and I've made a countless number of mistakes but I miss you more than anything. No boy is worth losing you over."

"My life is a living hell Peyton and you weren't there for me when I needed you the most. I needed my best friend to help me get through the mess my life had become but she was busy chasing after the same boy that ruined our friendship to begin with. How the hell do you think that feels?

"What's going on with you Brooke? I knew you were having troubles but what the hell has been going on? I thought you'd recovered."

"I did for a while but eventually I cracked and I lost myself," the brunette answered quietly, peeling back her sleeve to reveal a gruesomely lacerated wrist.

Peyton gasped in astonishment as her green eyes widened in terror. "Brooke…" she croaked, reaching out to run her fingers along the broken brunette's self inflicted lower arm.

"I did this to you. It's all my fucking fault Brooke!" she cried out as she let go of Brooke's wrist.

"No Peyton you didn't do this to me. Life did this to me. Maybe you helped but I would've done it anyways. I always act strong Peyton but I'm not and it's about time the world saw that."

"Brooke I want to be in your life again. Please just let me!" Peyton pleaded, tears gathering in her pale green eyes. She wanted to help Brooke get her life back on track.

Brooke shook her head stubbornly. "You lost the right to be in my life a long time ago."

"Brooke…"

"Peyton just leave! I told you this friendship is over. You are dead to me Peyton. You have been for a long time now. Just go!" Brooke yelled harshly, the coldness in her eyes warning Peyton that she was being dead serious.

Peyton nodded her head slowly. "You're my best friend Brooke. Don't ever forget that and just so you know I am here for you whenever you need me. If it gets too tough, I'll be there to fall back on. I will never let anything ruin our friendship again because it is not worth it. Not even Lucas Scott is worth it," she smiled before turning to walk away from Brooke.

"You have a nice life Brooke. I hope things get better for you."

The minute she heard the door close, Brooke broke down. She slunk against the wall, tears cascading from her distressed hazel eyes. She wanted to forgive Peyton so badly but she couldn't. She wasn't sure if she ever would. When the fuck had life become so complicating?

Suddenly
The lights go out
Let forever
Drag me down
I will fight for one last breath
I will fight until the end

Brooke sat in a booth at Karen's Café waiting for Lucas to come. She glanced at her watch, he was 10 minutes late. That was so unlike Lucas, he was never late for anything. She pulled out her cell phone to call him when she saw Karen approaching her.

"Hey Brooke," she smiled graciously, sitting down next to the younger brunette.

"Hey Karen, do you know where Lucas is? He was supposed to meet me here 10 minutes ago."

"Actually no he wasn't. He just wanted you to come down here and talk to me," Karen smiled placing her hand on top of Brooke's.

"That bastard," Brooke grumbled. "I don't need to talk to anyone."

"Brooke what is going with you? Lucas told me that things were bad but it wasn't his place to tell me so he was hoping I could talk to you. Maybe help you out a bit."

"I don't need any help. I'm doing just fine," Brooke argued, tapping her foot against the floor impatiently. The truth was she didn't want Karen to see how weak she was. She knew that Karen viewed her as a strong and independent woman like herself not as a weak and vulnerable broken girl that had lost her way.

"Brooke please just talk to me. Tell me what is going on with you," Karen pleaded, noticing the broken look in Brooke's eyes. She didn't like this version of Brooke at all.

"I hate my life," Brooke surrendered, knowing there was no way Karen would give up.

"Why Brooke? Does it have to do with Lucas?"

Brooke shook her head. "It did at first but I got over that. Somehow life broke me down. I lost myself and I know longer know who I am. I just want to live again, to feel again."

"You don't have to do this to yourself Brooke. You need to get help with your condition. I don't know what happened to you Brooke but it's changed you. I just want to see the cheerful Brooke Davis, the girl that could brighten anyone's day with her dimpled smile and contagious laugh."

"That girl is gone Karen. I wish she wasn't but she is," Brooke sighed sadly, looking down at her feet. "Drugs, alcohol, cutting, they all help me get through the day. They are my only vices left and I've become so dependent on them. It's almost like I can't function without them."

"Have you considered getting professional help? You know like checking into rehab or something?" Karen questioned, looking at Brooke sympathetically.

Brooke nodded. "Yes I have but I don't want to. I don't need rehab because I know that I could quit anytime I wanted to. I just don't want to. Life is too hard and they make it easier."

"Honey, I know that life gets hard sometimes but you just need to put a smile on your face and keep a positive attitude. That can get you through each day too you know," Karen smiled sincerely.

"I want out Karen. I can't do this anymore. My life has absolutely no ounce of meaning left in it. There is no reason for me to wake up and do the things I love anymore," Brooke cried out, tears falling from her saddened hazel eyes.

Karen's motherly instincts kicked in and she wrapped her arms around the damaged brunette. "You're life does have meaning in it. You mean everything to me, and to Lucas, and Nathan and Rachel. We will always love you Brooke and I think sometimes you all give us some hope. I see the things you've been through at such a young age and I think if that girl can make it through life than so can the rest of us. You are such a strong girl Brooke and you've touched the lives of all of us even if you don't realize it."

"That's just it Karen. I'm not a strong girl. Everyone thinks I am but I'm not. I put on this act because I don't want people seeing my weakness. I want people to believe that I am strong so I pretend that I am!" Brooke cried, her body quivering from crying so hard.

"Brooke you are a strong girl. You must believe that. You are the strongest person I've ever met in my entire life. Your strength inspires me Brooke and I know that it is not an act. Nobody is invincible and you eventually cracked. Nobody can hold on forever," Karen encouraged, looking Brooke in the eye. "When I look at you I see this amazing beautiful, strong girl. You are going to do great things in your life Brooke. You just need some direction and you have lots of people willing to help you find your way. You just have to let them."

"Thank you Karen. That means everything to me," Brooke whispered quietly, embracing the older woman that she considered a second mother in her arms.

"That's what I'm here for," Karen chuckled as she rubbed Brooke's back soothingly in attempt to comfort the broken girl in front of her.

"How do you do it?" Brooke questioned her gaze meeting Karen's warm brown eyes.

"Do what?"

"Get through each day with such grace even after everything you've been through. I mean with having Lucas so young and being left alone to raise him by yourself, being tortured by Lucas's evil vindictive father, and losing Keith how do you do it?

Karen offered Brooke a small smile. "It's simple. I love Lucas and I wouldn't give him up for anything in the world. It was hard raising him alone but I wouldn't have it any other way. As for Dan I don't let him get to me. He made his choice and I'm not the one that has to regret it. He does. And I may have lost Keith but I know that he loved me and that he wouldn't want me to sit here and mourn about my loss. He would want me to move on with my life and find a new beginning. I think about how blessed I am to have all these wonderful things in my life and it gives me a reason to love my life."

"You are amazing you know that Karen?" Brooke grinned, clearly having been moved by Karen's speech.

"You're not bad yourself Brooke Davis. I just hope that you find your way soon because I miss you more than anything."

Dear Agony
Just let go of me
Suffer slowly
Is this the way it's got to be?
Dear Agony

"Hey Luke," a voice called, causing the blonde brooder to look up from his computer screen.

"Brooke!" he smiled enthusiastically, shutting his computer and rushing over to the brunette. He prayed to god that she wasn't mad at him for getting Karen to intervene.

"You're not mad are you?" he asked once she pulled away.

Brooke shook her head. "Talking with your mom really helped me. I think she should be a psychologist instead of a chef."

Lucas chuckled. "Well that's great Brooke. I hope things work out for you because you deserve to be happy again."

"I hope so Luke. I want to feel something again. I just want to be myself again."

"You will be because I have faith in you and so does everyone else. You're going to be amazing Brooke and you are going to continue to change lives because that is what you do best."

"Lucas you are amazing you do know that right?"

"I've been told," he chuckled, gazing into Brooke's eyes, hoping to see the life come back into them soon.

Nobody ever said that life was supposed to be easy because it isn't. Life is full of complications and twists and bumps in the road. Some people learn to swerve and others hit the bumps and it slows them down for a while and throws them off course, making them lose their way. That's what happened to Brooke Davis. She forgot to swerve and hit a major bump in life. But if we didn't hit those bumps what would be the point of life? There would be no point. Sometimes all it takes is one person to make you realize that those bumps are just minor setbacks. They are not the end. For Brooke Davis it took Karen Roe to help set her life back on track. Brooke was sick of torturing herself like this. She had the will to change, she just didn't want to but now it was time to hit the road and keep moving along. Her journey was nowhere near over. It had just begun.

AN: The old Brooke Davis is coming back. It may be a slow start but its coming. Next chapter is going to be Brooke finally picking up the pieces and moving on with life once and for all. Within the next few chapters the final endgame will be announced and the lyrics are Dear Agony by Breaking Benjamin. Please review and let me know what you think!