Chp. 11- Raw Emotion

Hermione's Thoughts

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Hermione dissolved into tears after he was gone. Now he knew as well, and he wanted her to get rid of the baby. She walked to her bedroom, relying on her memory of the common room to guide her since she couldn't see. She grabbed her door knob and pushed the door open before closing it, and walking to her bed. She stripped out of her clothes and slipped a t-shirt over her head.

She fell on her bed, crying herself to sleep.

Now:

Hermione woke up and started crying again. Her life was ruined and Malfoy, who had put her in this situation, wanted nothing to do with her now.

She slowly made her way to the bathroom, and started the shower. She let the water fall over her face for several minutes before washing up. Her actions were mechanic as she went through her morning routine. Finally she was dressed and had her Arithmancy and Care of Magical Creatures in her bag. She slowly went down to the Great Hall.

Hermione took her seat in between Harry and Ron, sipping on some tea. She could feel the boy's eyes on her but chose to ignore them.

"So what's wong with you Hermione? Was it the flu?"

How she wished it was just the flu...

"I really don't want to talk about it right now...I'll tell you later, ok?"

She looked at them and saw them with curious faces. They nodded slowly and continued to stare at her even after she looked away. Harry shared a glance with Ron. What was Hermione keeping from them? Ron shrugged at Harry as Hermione got up and made her way outside.

She wrapped her cloak tighter around herself as the wind blew in her face. She made her way down to Hagrid's hut and saw him standing outside.

"What are you doing out here so early Hermione? Class doesn't start for fifteen minutes..."

"I wasn't hungry really and I just wanted to be away from everyone else," Hermione admitted.

Hagrid gave her a soft smile before going back into his hut. She sat down on the edge of his steps and looked at her feet. There was another life growing inside her right now...Either a baby girl or boy, and Malfoy was it's father.

She could feel the tears threatening to fall, but wiped them away before they could. She shouldn't cry when she was pregnant. It wouldn't be good for the baby, and that's who she had to think about from now on.

At least she wouldn't have to focus on her ruined life, or the fact that Malfoy had hurt her...

Students started walking outside after ten minutes, and Hermione blinked all her tears away. She stood up and waited for Harry and Ron to join her. She saw Malfoy sauntering out with Blaise and Pansy. She turned her head so she wouldn't have to look at him...It hurt too much!

He stopped several yards away from her, and Hermione was grateful. Harry and Ron stood on either side of her as Hagrid talked about a Crup. Hermione didn't pay attention though.

Her mind wandered as she stood there.

What are mum and dad going to say when I show up home nine months pregnant? I really don't want to owl them with the news but if I don't tell them before I get home then they're going to be mad. Perhaps during Christmas break is the best time to tell them...

Hermione realized that class had ended and people were headed back to the castle. She hurried after the boys, and made her way to Arithmancy. She took a seat and told herself to focus. She was taking notes all period, glad that she had something to distract her mind.

As she wrote she thought of something new.

What am I going to do when I start showing? People are going to start talking about me...I need to look if there's anyway I can conceal a big belly. I'm going to need bigger uniforms and robes too once my belly starts growing.

She made a mental note to think about it after lunch, when she had no classes. She finished the notes up as the bell rang and made her way down to the Great Hall.

Hermione sat between Ginny and Harry, grabbing an apple to eat. She then grabbed some more food, even though she wasn't hungry. Finally she decided she had ate enough and headed to the Head common room. She had seen Malfoy still eating when she left. She hurried up the floors, not wanting to see him, although she figured he didn't want to see her either.

She gasped for breath as she headed to her bedroom. She closed the door quietly, and leaned against it. She was absolutely exhausted and it was only two. She grabbed the pregnancy book she had gotten from Madam Pompfrey before settling down on her bed.

Might as well read what's going to happen to me...

Hermione flipped through the book and saw she could gain heightened sense of smell, develop likings for weird foods, experience nausea and fatigue, develop dizziness or headaches, increased urination, experience mood swings including crying spells and even develop some tenderness in her breasts. The morning sickness lasted normally nine weeks, but it could last even longer. Perhaps she should talk to Madam Pompfrey to see if there was a potion to cure the morning sickness.

The book even said she would have a heightened sexual desire between the fifth and eighth month.

"Oh great...Just what I need," Hermione scoffed to herself.

She felt another wave of fatigue fall over her, and she closed her eyes. It wouldn't hurt to get a small nap in. She fell asleep, and didn't wait till the next morning.

Hermione spent the next few days reading the pregnancy book during her free time, drinking all the information in. Malfoy had been avoiding her like the plague, not that Hermione really minded. Actually she was glad...If he was going to be an arsehole, then he could stuff it.

Classes had ended for the day, and Hermione changed into a pair of black shorts and a white tanktop. She grabbed the pregnancy book and decided to settle down on the couch. She laid down, resting her head on the couch arm. She opened her book to the bookmark currently keeping her place in the second trimester chapter.

Hermione started reading her book and was only several pages ahead of where she had been earlier, when she heard the portrait open. She froze but didn't look up. It was him...Perhaps she shouldn't have come out to the common room.

Her eyes started to water, but she blinked them back. She wasn't going to cry...especially not in front of him.

He wasn't moving, so Hermione looked up. He threw something at her, and Hermione caught it with fear. She sat up and looked in her hands.

It was a ring case...She opened it and saw a platinum ring with a huge rectangular diamond in the center. It also had small sapphires and diamonds alternating around the band. Her eyes widened as she stared down at the expensive ring.

What the hell?

"What the hell is this Malfoy?"

Malfoy sat down in the chair across from her, staring at her. He rubbed his forehead before replying.

"What does it look like Granger? It's a wedding ring..."

"Yes I know, but why did you throw it at me?"

"It's for you."

"I thought you wanted nothing to do with me, or the baby," Hermione said in a fierce tone.

"Yes well I changed my mind Granger."

Hermione closed the ring case, and breathed deeply. Now Malfoy was proposing to her but days before he had stormed off with no intent on being there for her or the baby.

"Why?"

"Well if you must know, I wrote my mother to ask her what to do. She replied back that I was to marry you, no matter your blood. That I had a duty to be the child's father and that the baby shouldn't be born out of wedlock. She also said that the Malfoy heir should belong to the Malfoy wife...so here I am..."

"What if I don't want to marry you?"

"That's just too damn bad for you because I'm not really giving you a choice..."

Hermione huffed indignantly at his comment before shaking her head in agreement. It was probably best for the baby...

If I marry him, then the baby will have both parents with it always...and I wouldn't have to worry about supporting it on my own. That would be soo hard when I'm just out of school with a newborn I have to take care of. I couldn't ask my parents for money without feeling bad...It's not their fault I'm in this situation. Malfoy has plenty of money to take care of the baby and it would be best if I don't raise a baby on my own. It would just be too hard for me to handle by myself...

"Fine Malfoy...I understand where you're coming from, but I have something I need to say. If we're going to get married then you're not going to keep using me like you have..."

She stared Draco down and saw his eyebrows raise up at this. His mouth turned into a smirk as he stared back at her.

"I told you it was a no strings attached deal before we started it, but obviously that's not how it happened. You will have wifely duties to complete, including satisfying my needs."

Hermione blushed at this and stared down at her hands, unable to look at him.

Wifely duties? Good Lord...

She breathed deeply before looking back up at Draco. He was staring at her, amused.

"When are we going to get married?"

"Soon. Within the week probably. Mother said we'd go to the Ministry to be officially married, just us and her."

Hermione nodded softly. She was going to be married in less than a week...to Malfoy. She was going to be Hermione Malfoy! Her head was having a hard time grasping the concent. She groaned as she remembered she would have to inform Ginny, Ron, and Harry. None of the three even knew she had slept with Malfoy, let alone she was pregnant and about to get married.

"What," Malfoy asked concerned.

Hermione let a small smile play upon her lips.

"It's nothing. I just have to tell Harry, and Ron about everything..."

Malfoy nodded his head. He still had to inform Pansy and Blaise as well.

"Well at least we know why you were sick in the morning...Did you get potions from Pompfrey for that?"

Hermione shook her head no.

"Not yet. I've been focused on reading this pregnancy book I got from her about what to expect in the coming months. It's quite interesting actually..."

"Really? What does it say?"

Hermione smiled before telling him what was going to happen in the first trimester. His eyes widened slightly at everything she was going to experience.

"All that is going to be happening?"

Hermione nodded to him.

"Yes...Did you want to know the sex of the baby...Draco?"

She could see a smile tug at his lips as she said his name softly. Usually she called him Malfoy, but if they were going to have a baby together and get married, that would have to stop.

"Did you find out already?"

"No...I...I was waiting until I told you, and I thought we could go together, but," Hermione trailed off at this.

But you were being a complete arsehole...

Draco nodded before coming over to her. Hermione moved her legs so he could sit down and felt Draco take her hands as he sat in front of her. She looked up into his eyes, curious as to why he was holding her hands so gently.

Merlin his hands are soft...

He took a deep breath before he said anything.

"Hermione...I'm sorry I was such a jerk before about the baby. I'll admit I was scared when you said you were pregnant. I never thought I'd be a father this young or be a father of one of your children...I pushed you away because I didn't know what to do and I didn't want you to see how scared I was," Draco whispered softly as he stared into her eyes.

Hermione felt tears fall at his words. Draco looked concerned and scared as she cried. He awkwardly hugged her, letting one of his hands rub soothing circles on her back, and the other hand stroked her hair.

"What's wrong?"

Honestly...She didn't know. It must be these crying spells...

She pulled back after several minutes, wiping away her tears. Draco was staring at her, and Hermione knew she probably looked horrible. She had circles under her eyes from lack of sleep, and bloodshot eyes from all the crying.

"I'm sorry...It's these mood swings and crying spells."

Draco nodded in understanding, but he still looked worried that she would burst into tears again. He had no clue what to do when a girl cried, and frankly it scared him. What were you suppose to do? Comfort them or just let them cry?

Hermione smiled shyly at him, her book resting against her stomach. Draco was staring down at her, still several inches taller than her when they were sitting. Hermione could feel her heart beat faster as his face came closer to her's. She stared up into his eyes, and saw raw emotion in them. He was finally showing emotions, not hiding them from her.

She saw he was scared yet happy. Draco closed the space between their lips, and kissed her tenderly. It was soft and sweet, not hot and passionate like all the others had been when they shagged. This wasn't a kiss filled with lust...No it was much more than that.

Hermione felt his right hand cup her left cheek and his thumb stroked her soft skin. She felt butterflies in her stomach and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling his body closer to her's.

Draco nibbled on her bottom lip, and Hermione opened her mouth for him. His tongue caressed every inch of her mouth softly before running over her own tongue. Hermione let a sigh escape at how wonderful this felt...He was being soft and gentle with her, not rough and passionate.

She felt her heart racing as Draco's free hand made it's way into her hair, fingering the soft curly strands. She felt one of his fingers twirl a strand of her hair around it, and felt his kisses become more passionate. He brought his hand down from her hair to caress her bare legs. His hand came up to her shorts, and he broke their lips apart to look at her.

Hermione's cheeks were flushed from being snogged senseless and she couldn't even think. Draco had never kissed her like that before...

Her chest rose and fell as she breathed deeply, trying to catch her breath. She knew she had stars in her eyes, but she didn't care. Draco stared down at her with swollen lips and kissed her again. This time it was only brief but still wonderful.

Finally they broke apart and Hermione licked her lips. They were puffy from Draco's lips kissing her, and she saw Draco's eyes on her lips and tongue. He was about to lean in again when there was knocking on the portrait.

"HERMIONE! Open up."

Hermione jumped at Harry's voice. The book fell to the ground and her eyes widened with surprise. She got off the couch quickly and grabbed the book. She ran to her room and hide it under her bed along with the scrolls. She looked down in her hands and saw the ring case. She threw that under the bed as well, before running back into the common room. Draco was not there anymore which Hermione was grateful for. She hurried over to the portrait and let the boys in.

Harry, Ron, and Ginny stared at Hermione, with her flushed cheeks. She was out of breath as she stood back to let them through.

"Why are you all flush?"

"It's hot in here...Don't you think so?"

"No...Are you alright Hermione," Ginny asked concerned.

"Of course. So what are you doing here?"

"We came to visit you...You've been walking around like a zombie for awhile now, and we want to know what's going on with you."

Hermione breathed deeply before ushering them to her room. She had a lot to tell them...

Well I'm leaving it there. I hope you all liked it. See! I wasn't going to leave things horrible for Hermione...Things are looking up. Please review and tell me what you thought of it!