A/N: Hey there peoples! I know it took time for me to upload this but I was busy. And tired. Anyways, I've thrown some plot twists in this one too. And explanations.

Disclaimer: Don't own Inuyasha or any songs I may reference/use. Always by Saliva

Chapter 11: Always

~SESSHOMARU~

It was the one thing I never wanted to happen. The one thing I had been working on to prevent. I nearly broke the speed limit driving to meet with Sango and Miroku. I knew there wasn't much time left. It was also the only time in my life I had ever been happy that we were the only two left in our family. No one should ever have to go through what was happening. I turned on the radio, needing to keep my mind off things.

"Here's a song by the biggest band in town right now! Enjoy!" The song that came on was one I knew well. It was my brothers voice after all. His voice was soft but rough at the same time. An odd mix but somehow he managed to do it. Then again with how his life had gone it was amazing he wasn't on the streets doing anything for his next fix.

At the end of the song I turned off the radio and drove the rest of the way in silence. I was close to my destination. It took 1 minute to park and get to the right apartment. I held the file in my hands. The file I'd secretly kept on my brother.

~KAGOME~

I heard the knock and quickly cleaned up the bed, hiding the blood with the covers. I rolled down my sleeve and made sure my finger was through the hole as I walked towards the voices. I took a deep breath before turning the corner. My body froze. My mind raced. It can't be.

"Sesshomaru, thank you so much for coming. You sure you know what's wrong?" Sango was closing the door, her whole body seemed relieved at the sight of the demon. He was just as he had been years before. Tall, slim, handsome by all accounts. His long silver hair, so much like Inuyasha's, was tied into a ponytail at the nape of his neck, as always. He removed the jacket of his navy blue suit, revealing the lilac button down he had underneath. The tie he pulled off was black.

"I do." His eyes found me and I saw the recognition. He remembered me. I wasn't surprised though I hardly expected it. I walked into the room but didn't say anything.

"Oh, hey there, Kagome. This is Sesshomaru, he's Inuyasha's older brother. He's here to explain what's going on." Miroku was sitting on a chair and leaned forward, watching Sesshomaru, waiting.

I nodded to him, deciding not to draw all the attention and prevent us from figuring this thing out. I just sat on the couch and brought a pillow to my chest, bringing my legs up too. Sango sat next to me and watched Sesshomaru too.

"I hoped it would never come to this, that I was wrong. I should have known better." His voice, so smooth and beautiful, rang with sorrow. Even though he looked at all of us when he spoke, I noticed the few seconds more he spent watching me.

"What do you mean?" Sango prompted.

"Do you remember when Inuyasha was 15. When he became extremely depressed and started changing?" Sango nodded.

"And how soon after he was back to his old self, even a little more social but started smoking pot?" Another nod from Sango.

"That was when I met him." Miroku's voice was low.

"Yes, it was when he got into music too. Inuyasha's depression wasn't like those of humans or demons. Half demons don't fit in. They are part human, part demon; abominations in some peoples minds. That aside, they also have half a human mind and half a demon one. Which means, in simple terms, that there is a human Inuyasha and a demon Inuyasha living inside him, fighting for control at all times." Sesshomaru gave us time to digest what he'd told us. Miroku and Sango were watching him but both were visibly in their own minds. Neither noticed when i met Sesshomaru's eyes. They also missed the emotions I saw behind them. He spoke once more, picking up the files he'd brought.

"As you can imagine that takes a toll on the half demons brain. This only starts in puberty, when any normal human and demon start becoming attracted to the opposite sex. It doesn't always show up right away, sometimes it presents a few years later. In these cases the half demon had a stable life in and outside of the home. A great change can cause the demon within to try to take power." Sango's face showed she knew what happened.

"Izayoi... of course. His mothers death." Sesshomaru nodded.

"Yes. When Inuyasha's mother died he was ready to kill her doctors. He wouldn't believe they couldn't help her. We'd lost our father not long before, Izayoi was everything to him. I had just started researching what was happening to hanyou when it happened. I noticed the differences between his depression and that of a normal teenager's reaction. The signs were all there. I had read in the notes of other researchers how some hanyou had gotten better after their depression had led them to taking drugs." He took a breath before continuing.

"I decided to try it. I never told my brother the truth. I'd told him I knew he was going through a bad time and wanted to help. I had smoked pot when I was in high school and college, and Inuyasha knew it. I told him we could do it together, that I wanted to be there for him. He got better soon after and started getting into music. He learned to play guitar and started singing."

"I hadn't read too far into the notes, I was looking for something to help Inuyasha. A demons system is different from a humans in that we need more drugs to get high, more alcohol to even get tipsy. I had read that those patients had gotten better while taking small amounts of drugs. What I hadn't gotten to before I decided to do what I did was that after some time the drugs they were using stopped working and they started going for something harder, with more of a high. All the cases we had ended in two ways. Death by OD, or their brains actually exploding from the pressure of the demon within.."

We all gasped. Why wasn't anything he was telling us public knowledge? I looked from Sango to Miroku, both most likely thinking the same thing I had.

"Unfortunately, there is no known cure, no medication to help. Anti-depressants and anti-psychotics don't work for longer than a few days. I kept an eye on my brother, keeping track of what was happening to him. When I was made director of the Kazumiya Treatment Center I had to leave my brother and was unable to watch over him anymore."

"Why didn't you ask us to help you?" Sango had two emotions in her voice. Anger and horror.

"I didn't want you to worry. I was hoping to be able to find something to help him before he went to far. That's why I asked you to call. Why I dreaded getting the call every day. Every time my cell rang I was relieved that it wasn't you. But it was happening to others. I had started a wing for hanyou because there wasn't one case where a hanyou lived normally. I didn't force Inuyasha there because I couldn't bare thinking of my brother as another patient."

"Is there any way to know how Inuyasha is? How his demon side is?" Miroku watched Sesshomaru with hope.

"It's been theorized that the stronger the demon who sired the child, the stronger the inner demon."

"Fuck." Sango was scared. She knew how strong Inuyasha's father had been. Miroku looked like he knew too.

"My father was extremely powerful. He owned much of the land for a long time because no one wanted to challenge him. He was undefeated in combat and in negotiations. Inuyasha's inner demon is strong."

Sango started crying. She'd known Inuyasha for so long but never knew what he was going through. Miroku started pacing. He'd been so close to him since they met. I remembered the stories Sango told me.

"Is there any way of knowing how Inuyasha is?" My voice was hoarse. I hadn't spoken for a long time. I noticed the change in Sesshomaru's eyes at the sound of my voice. I was unsure if it was because of me, or what he knew.

"His progression is fast. All those at the center who progressed fast became bi-polar. Their episodes were triggered by a mating reflex. When a demon finds his mate they find it hard to be away from that person. When the mate is near, especially if the demon is close to claiming them or feeling intense emotions, they release a scent. This scent is produced just for the one they hope to mate." No one noticed my breathing stop for a split second. That was..

"Usually only male demons react this way but even female hanyou reacted this way both at the center and at home. Most of the time the mate was a visitor, there to see another patient. When the visitor left, the hanyou because distraught, started acting irrationally. There were some cases where the hanyou didn't become themselves again even after the mate had returned. Those hanyou were completely changed. If they used to be sweet they are pricks. They'd try to hurt others emotionally, especially the mate if they'd gotten close."

"So wait, you're saying finding their mate cause an episode, and that some insulted their mate, going as far as to try to emotionally hurt them?" Sango looked at me once she finished her sentence.

"Yes. Treatment for bi-polar only worked for a few weeks. They would soon have another episode. Those who didn't recover with their mate near make up the majority of those whose brains exploded." Sesshomaru looked at us all, watching our reactions.

"It happened after we kissed. We sang together, he'd been keeping away some guy who thought I was someone else. Anyways, when we kissed I could smell something sweat yet spicy, something that calmed me. He pulled away abruptly and just left. I felt like I had been broken..." His eyes told me what I already knew before he spoke.

"That's the effect of your souls connected. The scent was his mating scent. Meant only for you, meant to open up your soul and bind you together." Even though his voice was calm I knew he hated saying those words.

"He went home and had sex with Kikyo. He always goes to when he isn't exactly himself. He defends her and sees her sometimes if I go to his place with someone but usually if he's with her he'd been acting odd for a little while beforehand." Miroku's voice was low and he looked at me sadly. After Inuyasha left me, after he broke me, he went and slept with the girl from the show. He'd been trying to hurt me after the show. But why? Why hadn't he stayed?

"I thought as much. The demon in him takes over more when the episodes hit. He must have gone to an easy lay." the comment was directed to me.. Something I'm not, no matter what people think.

"So what? Does this mean we can't help him?" Sango was frantic.

"No, it doesn't. We need to find him and try to get him to the center. I can try some experimental treatments we just recently got approval to test. The only way we can guarantee he will stay, and might get better, is if his mate is there too." Sesshomaru wasn't joking. He wanted me there.

"If it's never been tested how do you know I need to be there?" I didn't want to go back. I wasn't going back!

"We've tested it on the only 2 hanyou progressing at Inuyasha's speed and a couple of those who weren't as bad. They've all been doing better, but only once their mates were with them."

"So Kagome needs to be with Inu for the treatment to work?" A nod from Sesshomaru made Sango turn to me.

"Will you do it Kags? I know you haven't known him long and he's hurt you more times in one day than he has in my entire friendship with him but it's the only way." Her eyes pleaded with e to say yes. Miroku also looked at me, waiting for my answer. I had no choice.

"I'll do it." Sango and Miroku got up and hugged me. The cuts on my arms weren't healed; they rubbed against my shirt causing them to sting and bleed a little more. I didn't care because I had just signed myself up o be back at the institute I was at after my cutting was discovered by a teacher. I had agreed to be back where Sesshomaru had the power.

"Good. We'll need your help to get Inuyasha there so you won't have to move in there till after we get him. But the faster the better, for all of us." No, just for you.

"I should get going, the center would fall apart with me gone long." Sango and Miroku got up to help see him out.

"Kagome, would you mind walking to my car with me? I'd like to talk to you." The demon didn't give me a chance to reply. I followed him out the door and to the elevator. He was quiet while we waited, only speaking once the elevator doors closed us in together. He let it got down a few floors before hitting the emergency stop button. Turning to me, he pushed me up against the wall.

"I knew we'd meet again, just like I told you when you left my institution." He lowered his nose into my hair, sniffing it before speaking.

"Kagome, you just can't get enough of me, can you? Maybe we can catch up, we have some time." he kissed my neck pushing his body into mine even more.

"No..please.." I felt weak. The blood from the cuts had started going through my shirt, adding in the blood loss from before, I was barely able to stand. Thankfully he pulled back and made the elevator start again.

"I have all the time in the world Kagome. Inuyasha will get better, and then I can get you in on your cutting again. You won't be able to stop. Not while being near me, while being touched by all the males again. It's funny how you claimed to be the victim but you just had to wear those mini skirts and shirts that barely covered your breasts." He walked out when the doors opened. I couldn't move.

"Just remember, Kagome, my brother may be your mate, but you belong to me." He walked out the doors ad into his car. The elevator doors just closed on me, not moving till I hit a button.

A/N: OMG I can't believe I did that! Oh wait...yea I can...anyways, I was gonna write a little more, maybe check in on Inu but it's 2 :30 in the morning and I am tired...so that's it for this chapter. R&R please.