Welcome to Chapter Eleven – UPLOADING the next block - apologies for multiple email alerts! Enjoy xx

Edward and Jasper are feeling a little ashamed of their behaviour at Bella's house and feel they should explain to you, readers, why they're estranged. Edward, as older brother, wanted to go first! PARENTAL ADVISORY: there are moments of explicit language and reference to sex in the later part of this chapter…please avoid if you know you should!

As ever, all things Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer. I'm merely messing with her delightful creations. No copyright infringement or offense is intended.

The Cullen Dilemma

Chapter Eleven

EPOV

I can't recall a time when I've been so embarrassed. Isabella's invitation to supper pleased me enormously; she's a very attractive and intelligent woman and I'd certainly like to get to know her better. I thought I might use the occasion to ask her out one evening.

I was shocked when I walked into her house to find my brother there. I suppose I shouldn't have been too surprised as I'd already seen them going out together in his stupid car. I hope they're not an item. No, surely not. Isabella is kind and friendly; I'm sure she'd just taken pity on her new neighbour and invited him over for a bite to eat. She couldn't possibly be attracted to my Neanderthal brother.

By the time I discovered who the new owner of number 6 was going to be it was too late to back out of my purchase, not that I really wanted to. If anyone is going to move it won't be me. Maybe Mum actually has a point when she says we Cullens have a stubborn streak!

It's hard to believe that we ended up buying houses in the same small development, let alone next door but one to each other. I thought I'd be able to avoid any contact; it's not as if we're close anymore. I sat down on my leather recliner and closed my eyes.

"Come on, Eddie, let's go to a club. I can't come all this way to visit you without going out on the town."

"Little Bro, you know I'm not a dancer. Never have been. Never will be."

"You work too hard; you need to chill out a little. Stop being such a stuffed shirt and let's have some fun." Jasper loved to tease me. We'd remained close in spite of the differing paths our lives had taken.

"But Jas, I feel awkward in bars and clubs you know this."

"And it's not going to get any better unless you practise putting yourself out there. Go and get ready; we'll leave in half an hour."

"You're really going to put me through this?"

"It's for your own good! It's not often I get a weekend pass from Maria and come to London to visit my brother. We have a lot to catch up on."

"I know, but we could catch up here with a few beers."

"Where's the fun in that? You spend far too much time here as it is. When was the last time you went out and partied?"

"Um…I went to the company Christmas Ball."

"That was in December, it's now August. I am seriously concerned about your social life – almost thirty-one years old and a virtual recluse."

"I like my own company."

"Yes, yes, but don't you ever get fed up of the company of your own hand?"

"Jasper Cullen, do you have to bring everything down to gutter level? I have all the company I want."

"Seriously Ed, when was the last time you had a girlfriend?"

"I've taken a few ladies out to dinner. I haven't had time for serious relationships; I've been concentrating on my studies and my career."

"Almost to the exclusion of all else. Mum was really disappointed that you missed nana Platt's eightieth birthday you know, and that's not the only family event you've missed."

"Mum and dad are supportive. They understand how hard I've had to work to get here and they're proud of that. I was the first Cullen to go to Cambridge. Mum knew that I had an important interview I couldn't get out of. I rang nana on the day and then came to see her the next weekend."

"Yeah, yeah, says you. Time's a-wasting Ed. Go and change. We'll grab a couple of drinks and then go on to one of those posh London clubs, see how the other half live."

In spite of our almost constant bickering, I loved my brother and I knew the sentiment was returned.

Jasper dragged me round some pretty dingy pubs, before we got into a black cab and headed for a club. We were both a little drunk and I wasn't taking too much notice of the directions he gave to the cabbie.

I was a bit surprised when we ended up in Soho, but thought we might be going to Ronnie Scott's, probably the most famous jazz club in the world. Unfortunately I was wrong, so wrong. We ended up in a club called The Green Carnation.

It was only after a couple of ludicrously expensive cocktails that I realised we were in a gay club. When I mentioned it to Jas he just laughed and told me to chill out, the place was straight friendly. I was irritated by his comment because I'd never been prejudiced in my life.

It turned out that Saturday nights were named 'Oscars' in honour of the famous writer and poet, Oscar Wilde; in fact the club marketed itself as 'a lavish place full of decadent pleasures' and 'hedonistic' in style.

I remember there being a very embarrassing cabaret called A-Lad-in-Tights, with outrageous drag queens singing 70's disco and making lewd comments. Jas got the giggles and thought the whole thing was hilarious.

In spite of my earlier protests, we did end up dancing, surrounded by an eclectic mix of gay and straight clubbers. When we were approached by two very attractive blonde girls, Jas winked and smiled; we danced on for several more songs and I was beginning to really enjoy myself.

We somehow managed to grab a table and ordered more drinks. Tanya and Irina were good company, pretty and intelligent. As we talked on, I noticed Tanya getting a little more touchy-feely, a light touch on my arm, leaning in to listen and a hand on my thigh. Jasper and Irina were chatting away, but sat further apart – I assumed because of Maria. As Jas had reminded me, I had no such commitment and I began to think of maybe asking Tanya out.

By around 3am we were ready to leave and the girls accompanied us out, it was now or never.

"Tanya," I said in a low voice, "I was wondering if you'd like to…"

"Honey, I thought you'd never ask," she interrupted. "Why don't you come back to my place for coffee?"

It honestly wasn't what I had in mind but I thought 'what the hell – live a little.'

We waited in a long queue at the taxi rank. Jas was waiting with Irina; he said he'd drop her off on his way back to my place.

"How tall are you, Tanya?" I asked, looking up at her face. She was certainly a long-legged beauty.

"Six-four in my bare feet," she said. "We girls of Russian heritage are often tall."

"You are tall." I might have slurred a little. "I'm six-two and I'm looking up to you."

Tanya giggled and winked.

We eventually managed to get a cab and Tanya gave the address.

Back at her flat, Tanya offered me a drink before coming to sit beside me on the sofa. She began to lean in and stroke my arm, allowing her fingers to stray up to my neck and along my jawline. I felt pleasantly warm in my alcoholic haze as she began to nibble my ear and kiss my neck.

I turned my head and pressed my lips to hers. It wasn't the soft, romantic kiss I expected; it was somewhat rough – in every respect.

"So, Edward," she whispered in a deep, dark voice. "Are you a top or a bottom?"

"A top or a bottom what?" I asked.

"Don't be coy, gorgeous. Do you like to take it in the arse, or receive it? I bet you have a beautiful cock, don't you?"

I may or may not have gagged, but the penny dropped and I sobered up instantly, at a total loss for words.

"I'm…err…straight, not that there's anything wrong with being gay, I mean. I'm just…not…" I stuttered out.

"Really, honey?" it was obvious now that Tanya's voice wasn't just deep and sexy; it was masculine.

"Yes. Really. Sorry. I didn't realise you were…" I didn't know how to complete the sentence.

"Are you sure I can't persuade you? You're much too pretty to be straight!"

"Um…thanks but no thanks. I'm really sorry I mistook you for…"

"…a woman? Don't worry about it, Eddie. I'm honoured. Flattered that my styling is so good; it takes ages to get ready and look this good."

"You look…err…fabulous," I stammered. "You had me totally convinced."

"Are you absolutely sure you're not curious? I'd be very gentle." Tanya asked.

"Nope. Not a bit curious. Not even a teeny tiny biy." I stuffed my hands into my pockets. "No offense but I like girls. Ladies. Women. Females."

Tanya laughed. "Don't worry honey. I'm not about to initiate you against your will. How about I call you a cab?"

"Thanks."

As my cab pulled away from the kerb, I gave a sigh of relief.

Jasper was still awake when I got home. "How did you get on with Miss Tanya?" he asked with a very broad grin on his face.

I took a look at my brother's smiling features. He knew. Jasper knew what I was getting into and he didn't say a word.

"You fucking knew!" I screamed at him. "How could you? You knew, didn't you?"

"Calm down, Eddie. It was just a bit of fun. No harm meant."

"No harm. No fucking harm! Is that what you think?"

Jasper laughed. It was a bad move. Before he knew what had hit him, I'd leapt over the coffee table and dragged him to his feet. I raised my fist. Somewhere in the back of my head I heard my mother's voice, telling me I must always look after my little brother.

"Get out!" I yelled.

"Edward, let it go. I'm sorry I messed up; I thought you'd see the funny side."

"There's nothing fucking funny about setting up your brother with a gay transvestite!"

Jasper couldn't help himself; he laughed out loud.

"I've told you; get the fuck out of my home!"

"Ed, be reasonable! It's the middle of the night. What am I going to say to Maria?"

"I don't care! Why don't you just tell her the truth? She can see what a Neanderthal she's shacked up with. I just want you gone."

"Edward, please. Don't do this."

"If there's anyone to blame, it's you Jasper Cullen. You need to grow up. I'm going to bed and when I get up tomorrow you'd better not be here."

I was fuming when I went to my room; I punched a couple of pillows, hoping it would help to release some of the anger I felt.

Then I grabbed a towel and went to the bathroom. I turned the shower to its highest, bearable setting in stepped in. I washed my hair twice, then grabbed a flannel and scrubbed my body as hard as I could. Thank god Tanya didn't push things; at least she, or he, was understanding. I didn't want to think about what could have happened. I felt bile rise in my throat and made it out of the shower just in time to kneel by the toilet and vomit.

I opened my eyes and looked around, blinking slightly in the darkness. I didn't often relive the memories that night; I was far too mortified by the whole episode. It wasn't even as if I'm homophobic, I'm not; several old friends from Uni are gay and it's never worried me. I suppose it was a valuable life lesson – never go off with anyone you don't know when drunk! I knew I was lucky to have escaped with everything, apart from my dignity, intact.

The very worst thing about it though, was the feeling of betrayal. My own baby brother knew what he was sending me to.

Jasper had left when I got up the following morning and that was pretty much the last we saw of each other. Our parents tried, in vain, to smooth things over. I'd not had a conversation with my brother in a little over 3 years…until last night.

Of one thing I was certain; Jasper Whitlock Cullen was not going to mess up my chances with Isabella Swan, brother or no brother.

I settled down and began to think of ways to apologise to her first thing tomorrow.