AN: I am trying to get in as many updates as possible before I really need to start focusing on the summer work for the beginning of the school year that I have been neglecting. I am more than halfway done with Tom Sawyer and then I have to read The Scarlet Letter. Ugh. So, here's chapter 11! Reviews:
Mrskaz453: Thank you so much for your review! I love getting reviews that specifically give their opinions of what's going on with the story. I agree with you 100% about Drew, he's being really selfish. Glad you like the story!
Jasmine: Your reviews are so motivational and sweet. Thank you so much!
Enjoy this chapter!
I am gasping for breath as I finish my story and beads of sweat are trickling down the side of my face. I don't even realize tears are rolling down my cheeks until Daryl reaches out to wipe them away. The only problem is more of the salty droplets come to replace the ones lost.
"Hey, it's gonna be a'right," Daryl tries to comfort, putting an arm awkwardly around me. I can tell he isn't used to comforting people or showing any kind of affection really.
"My own mother was telling me I should have helped him," I sniffle, "But I ran like a coward and she died trying to do what I was too scared to."
"That's where ya are wrong. Cody was already lost and if ya had stayed any longer, it woulda been you on the ground bein' ripped apart," he says sensibly, turning to face me.
"It should have been me instead of him. He was only twelve…"
"Stop it. Now he doesn' have to deal with the sufferin' this world brings. And if it was you instead of im', your group from before wouldn' have made it this far. No one woulda stepped up to help Glenn and Rick. Not one of em' would have volunteered to go save ma brother even if they didn' know im'," he says with his blue eyes locked on mine.
"That's not entirely true. I'm sure Val, Drew, or Luke would have taken control of the group before you guys. I just felt so useless. I couldn't do anything," by now the tears have stopped and the empty feeling has returned.
"So stop blamin' yourself for somethin' that couldn' be helped. All it does is make ya lose sleep," he releases my shoulders, but sits so close to me that our thighs are brushing.
I nod; knowing what he told me is true. It will just take time to get used to that new thinking.
It feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my chest and I take a deep breath and stare back out at the stars.
There is a brief moment of silence before Daryl asks softly, "Who was Phil?"
I sigh, feeling guilty about not really thinking of him all that much even though of course he means something to me.
"He was my uncle visiting from Oklahoma. We were planning on driving up to their home to get his daughter, but we weren't able to make it. I don't know what happened to him, he kind of just disappeared. I always assumed he just died. There were too many of those things, we barely made out it by the skin of our teeth as it is."
Daryl looks thoughtful for a minute before he says, "He coulda gotten out. Maybe when he got separated from ya he realized it was time to go or he woulda been a meal himself."
"I hope so…"
Our conversation continues for a little while longer about the world before the apocalypse before just dying out altogether. The silence this time is comfortable though as we lay underneath the inky sky in peace.
Three hours later, T-Dog and Rick are up for watch and Daryl and I are able to get some sleep.
I stifle a yawn as we tiptoe throughout the house, trying not to wake anyone as we make our way to our room.
"Tired blondie?" Daryl smirks.
"Guess that nap didn't help much," I murmur quietly.
Once we get into the dim room, the only source of light being the moon shining through the bay windows, I pull out a pair of pajamas and go to the bathroom to change.
When I return I notice Daryl lying on a makeshift bed he made on the floor out of a few pillows and a thin blanket.
"What do you think you are doing?" I ask, coming to stand next to him with my hands on my hips.
"You are takin' the bed," he mumbles into a pillow.
"Uh, no I'm not, you are," I reply, not wanting to sleep comfortably if he had to lie on the hard wood floor.
He opens one eye and peers up at me, "Ya are takin' the damn bed. Now get in."
"No thanks, I prefer the floor," I argue, snatching a pillow and the comforter neatly resting on the bed. I throw it on him and lay my pillow on the floor a few feet away from him so we have space between us.
"Why do ya have ta be a pain in ma ass?" Daryl asks and I hear him stand.
"What are you-?" then I am up in his arms bridal style as he dumps me onto the bed.
"You can't just-" I begin indignantly, but the fluffy, white comforter is thrown in my face rudely and the words are muffled.
"Daryl," I groan, "This is ridiculous. Just get in with me. It's plenty big enough." He doesn't answer so I just sigh dramatically and roll over without the blanket.
By the time I am halfway asleep, I feel the bed shift slightly as a new weight is added to the other end. A blanket is placed over me and I smile to myself at my small victory.
I awake the next morning a little later than I usually do. I'm alone in the middle of the bed and sit up confused. I lean over the side of the bed in search of Daryl, but the floor is devoid of him or any pillows.
I reach up to feel my head; a lump is still there from whacking my head on that rock. It's really starting to irritate me. I really hope I don't have a concussion…
I glance up and notice Daryl leaning against the door frame which interrupts my conversation with myself.
He is grinning and I give him a curious look. "What's up with you?"
"Ya should keep your hair like that more often," he snickers and I just glare at him as I get out of bed.
"Oh shut up," I wave a hand at him as I go get changed and fix my hair.
I reemerge with my hair in a tight fishtail braid, a pair of acid wash shorts, and a black, slightly cropped t-shirt.
Daryl must have gone back downstairs where I assume breakfast is being made. I am on my way down when I feel a tug on my shirt. I look down to see Sophia looking up at me with those innocent brown eyes.
"Your hair looks pretty today," she compliments and I can't fight the smile that spreads across my face.
"Thanks," I say happily.
"Do you think you could to that to my hair?" she asks, hopeful.
I frown slightly. "I think your hair might be too short."
Her face falls and I rush to reassure her, "We will come up with something even better for your hair."
Her smile returns and she hugs my waist. I stroke her hair as we reach the first floor and I turn to look at Carol who smiles sweetly at me.
Breakfast is canned fruit and leftover squirrel from one of Daryl's past hunting trips.
"Is this even safe to eat anymore?" Val asks, picking at the squirrel.
"Now isn't the time to be picky, Val. I mean really, its food," Shawn points out from beside her.
"We should start packing up," announces Rick, "We leave in an hour and continue on our way to Fort Benning."
I finish my breakfast and fly back up the stairs to get my bag, eager to get moving. I don't know why, but there's something unnerving about staying in someone else's house when no one knows if they are dead or alive anymore.
I make sure to grab Daryl's bag as well and descend the stairs once more.
I arrive at the truck and notice Daryl sliding the motorcycle out with T-Dog's help.
"Watcha doin'? I ask curiously.
"Gonna take the motorcycle. The truck's too much of a gas hog."
"Okay, I'll put our stuff in the RV then."
Once I'm done, I walk back over to Daryl, eyeing the metal death trap nervously.
"What, are ya scared of this thing?" he asks.
"I'll deal," I reply, trying to sound confident.
"Didn' know ya wanted ta still ride with me," Daryl responds, narrowing his eyes.
"Well if you don't want me to, I'm sure I could ride in the van with…um Drew, Shawn, Andrea, and T-Dog," I say uneasily.
Daryl just grunts and shrugs nonchalantly. "It's up ta you, blondie. I don' really care."
"Okay, I'll ride with you and the death trap then."
He just scoffs and rolls his eyes, muttering under his breath, "Women make a big deal out of nothin'."
I smile and help everyone else bring their stuff out. It isn't long before we are back on the road with me clinging to Daryl for my life as the motorcycle roars beneath us.
We are on a highway when the caravan slows down. Daryl swerves and picks up speed to get next to the RV to see what the holdup is.
Naturally with our luck there is a huge truck flipped over and blocking the road.
"See a way through?" Dale asks Daryl through the window.
Daryl pauses then nods and jerks his head toward the wreckage. We lead the way through the maze of cars and the RV carefully weaves around.
I just stare blankly at the cars, seeing stuff everywhere. Blood being no exception. Unmoving bodies lay in the vehicles and it's quite gruesome to look at.
I look back when I realize everyone has stopped and tap Daryl on the shoulder. We pull over and go investigate to see why white smoke is pouring from the RV.
We just catch the tail end of Dale's rant about being stuck in the middle of nowhere with no hope of continuing.
Shane decides to interrupt asking, "Problem Dale?"
"Okay, that was dumb," he says, paying better attention to his surroundings.
"Can't find a radiator hose here," Shane continues sarcastically.
"There are a lot more things we can find," Daryl says, rifling through the trunk of a car.
"We can siphon more fuel from these cars for a start," T-Dog announces.
"Maybe some water?" Carol actually speaks up.
"That would be great," I pipe up, agreeing with her.
"Food," adds Glenn wistfully.
"This is a graveyard," Lori interrupts.
Everyone, even Daryl turns to look at her.
"I don't know how I feel about this."
"We have to. These people are dead and as unsympathetic as that sounds, we are alive. We need to gather all the supplies we can get to ensure our survival. Life is for the living," I tell her softly.
Everyone looks at me then, and I start to feel self-conscious.
"Um, I'm gonna start looking," I say pointing behind me and hurrying away from their inquisitive eyes.
"That was quite the speech," I hear a voice say behind me. Shane lengthens his stride to catch up to me.
"I was just trying to make her feel a little better about it," I tell him.
I stop at an empty Toyota car and open the passenger door. I nearly gag on the smell of the decaying body leaning on the steering wheel. That doesn't stop me from grabbing his backpack and dumping the contents on the hood.
"Look Ang, I'm sorry if I upset you at the house yesterday," Shane says softly.
I look at him, a little caught off guard. "I was just a little strung out, I didn't mean to take it out on you," I apologize.
"Everyone has their moments," he says in an understanding tone.
"Okay, look Shane, I want to know what you are planning with my sister," I change the subject. I fold my arms across my chest and stare him down with unwavering eyes.
"What do you mean?" he asks, a little uncomfortable.
"Are you in a relationship with her?" I prompt.
"I was getting around to that. Val is a great girl and I was going to ask her if she would be…well I don't know if the title 'girlfriend' means anything anymore," he says sheepishly.
I narrow my eyes. "Then what the hell is going on between you and Lori? I'm not stupid, I know something is up and I am not going to let you hurt Val," I say taking a step closer to him.
Something changes in his eyes then. They turn darker and his eyes narrow just like my own. "What do you know about that?" he asks, dangerously quiet.
"For starters, I'm pretty confident that it was Lori who scratched your neck," I say, gesturing to the red marks.
He grabs his neck then without even noticing it looks like and steps back. "You wouldn't understand that even if I explained it to you. I'm done with Lori. My eyes are only for Val," he answers, his eyes returning to normal.
"They better be," I grumble and turn my attention back to sorting through the mostly junk in the backpack. I can hear Shane's rapidly retreating footsteps.
I sigh and abandon the crap lying before me. It's all useless. Who the hell thought packing toothpicks and a plastic dinosaur would help them survive? I would actually take the toothpicks, but I don't trust what could be on them. Sticking them in my mouth is a risk I am not willing to take.
I continue to amble amongst the cars, the Georgia heat really starting to get to me. Then I see Drew. I casually start walking over to him and just as I am about to call out, I trip over my foot and hit the ground hard.
Why have I been so clumsy lately?
Drew whirls around and spots me on the ground. "Jesus Angela, you startled me!" he exclaims before pulling me up off the ground.
I dust myself off and feel my cheeks go warm.
"You never were the most graceful," Drew chuckles and looks down at the ground.
"So you are talking to me again?" I ask tentatively.
Drew runs a hand through his black hair once. "I know I haven't been treating you right. I just got so mad…how can one guy who seems to be a social outcast grab your attention when I have been trying all my life to get you to look at me the way I look at you?" He sounds so much like a lost little boy that I can't help but feel bad for him.
I reach out and pull him into a hug. I feel his arms tighten around me before I release him.
"I know my feelings toward you aren't what you want them to be, but you have to learn to accept that that's the way they are for now," I try to explain.
I notice Drew's hazel eyes perk up at this. "For now?"
"Don't read into my words like that," I say sternly.
Then his face falls slightly. "Oh right, I forgot you are with Daryl," he hisses.
"Don't act like that," I say disapprovingly. "For your information, Daryl is a friend," I say a little grudgingly. I wish it was more than that. Oh my god. Did I just admit to myself that I have feelings for Daryl Dixon? This heat is worse than I thought it was.
"JUST a friend?" Drew asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Here's where you're pushing it," I grumble, starting to walk away.
"Sorry," he calls after me and I stick my hand up to signal goodbye for now.
That went better than I thought it would. In a way.
"Hey Angela!" I hear Lori call to me.
"Hm?" I ask.
"Can you watch Carl for me?"
"Sure," I nod, a little curious as to where she could be off to in a place like this.
"Thanks, I just need to talk to Rick real quick."
"You got it. Wait, where are Carol and Sophia?" she points in their general direction.
"Hey kiddo," I say to Carl.
"Hi."
"Let's go find Sophia and then maybe we can find something for you two to eat."
He nods vigorously and we greet Carol and Sophia. "Do you want me to watch Sophia for a little while? I have Carl right now so I figured the three of us could spend some time together," I offer to the mother of one.
Carol looks at me gratefully. "That would be great. Thank you."
I reach out to take Sophia's hand and with Carl on my other side, we venture off into the land of abandoned cars.
"Hey look," I point out all of a sudden. Lying on the ground, still in its packaging which I think is really odd, is a pink headband.
Carl bends down to pick it up and hand it to me.
"Thanks. Hey, Sophia, I think I know what we can do for your hair," I say, waving around the headband. The plastic crinkles as I move it. She grins up at me.
"That works!"
"Sorry Carl, can you just humor the girls for a moment?" I ask.
He nods once.
"Good man."
I don't feel too weird about taking the headband because by the looks of it, no one had actually used it yet so it wasn't like we were using a dead little girl's belonging.
"Perfect," I smile as I adjust it on her head. "It even matches the pink of the rainbow on your shirt," I say, lightly poking her stomach. She giggles softly.
"Walkers! Get down!" comes Rick's panicked whisper. I watch as Lori and Carol diver under a car and Lori restrains Carol from running to get Sophia.
Without a moment's hesitation, I am wedged under a tight space beneath a car with Sophia and Carl pulled close to my sides. I wouldn't be able to grab my knife if I were to need it because my thighs are pressed together and my gun is too loud. Shit.
I am definitely going to have a red mark in the shape of a knife on my inner thigh once I get out from under this car.
Sophia starts to struggle as the heavy shuffle of walkers stumbling past fills the silence.
I don't want to man handle her, but I can't have her make any noise or we will be spotted. I cover my hand over her mouth and she struggles some more.
"Shh," I soothe, barely audible. She stops squirming a little.
I don't know how many walkers there are, but if we weren't warned, all of us would have been goners. Their moans are low and hungry sounding, causing the hair on the back of my neck to stand up.
I feel like we are under that car for hours, although that's probably me being dramatic.
Even when the last feet shuffle past, I try to keep the kids pinned down. Somehow Sophia manages to slip from my grasp and wriggle out from under the car.
"Mommy!" she whisper shouts.
Then her whispering turns to screaming as two stragglers lunge for her. I have to bite my own tongue to keep from crying out in fear, but I can't risk Carl being grabbed so I stay put.
Rick is already up and moving, jumping over the guardrail after Sophia and the snarling walkers.
Not again.
What did I just do?
AN: Naturally after learning to let go of the blame she has against herself over Cody's loss, Angela has to deal with Sophia slipping from her grasp. Let me know what y'all thought in the reviews!