Hey guys, Lunamon810 here. I've written on this the past... five or six days, I headed up to visit some family out of state about... three days ago. So I did a lot of writing, alongside my cousin Red-chan. And I totally don't remember her actual fanfiction username... Red X Trouble? Maybe. Anyways. So yeah I wrote on this, and since I had no convenient stopping place due to free writing (no internet; no place to check how many words I've written) have 2,000 more words than my typical chapter. I keep reading the word count (6,083) and keep wanting to just throw a brick at something for not being able to split the chapter somewhere so I could have part of the next chapter written. xD

Now lets hope it doesn't eat up internet data to update a fanfiction, yeah?

Gomenasai for any OOC-ness from... Well... I suppose you'll know who I'm talking about when you see how they're acting. Then again, Red-chan (AKA the goddess of *insert-character-name-here*-writing, or at least I call her that) approves, so maybe I'm okay...? Come on he's a minor character no one knows how he acts in a general situation. xD

I also apologize for any spelling errors. Wordpad doesn't have spell check, and that's all I have to write on on my laptop other than Notepad. I ran it through spellcheck at LEAST twice, plus I read over it myself. I tried really hard. Typically when I write, I have spell check and can take care of spelling errors when they happen. So please bare with my this chapter. xD (And no Bushwah, this doesn't give you permission to nag me about my spelling. Because I know that's where your thoughts are now.)

Disclaimer: HUNTER X HUNTER IS OWNED BY TOGASHI, AKA NOT ME.

By time I finally got out of the hospital, I had two months left to battle. The doctor suggested I got used to moving around again before I battled, and a serious glare from my little brother told me I was to obey the doctor. As I left my room, I looked down the hall to see Gon coming our way. I hadn't been able to see him since I went in two months ago, he looked a lot better. His arm was still in a sling, but he was no longer all bruised up. When our eyes met he ran straight at me, and I braced myself. His feet left the ground as he tackled me, and I wasn't quite braised enough. I hit the floor, keeping my head up so that I didn't get a concussion or something. "Come on, Gon! I just got out of the hospital! I'll never make it in time to fight if you break my head open!"

"Hehe, sorry Ellilou! I've just missed you! Killua told me about everything that happened... You shouldn't have fought Hisoka, you could have been killed..."

"I know... I know... I'm sorry. But I missed you too." I said, desperately trying to change the subject. I already felt bad enough due to Killua, I didn't want to feel guilty because of Gon too. Killua came out of my room, having demanded he got to carry my stuff so I didn't put stress on my arm. He looked at us, my backpack in his arms due to his being on his back. He stared for a minute before he said anything to us, just blinking.

"What are you two doing down there? We have to hurry up and get you two to your rooms before something else can happen. We wouldn't want to miss Hisoka's match." I looked a Killua, raising my eyebrows.

"Hisoka's match? What the hell? What match?"

"I paid good money for two tickets to Hisoka's match tonight, so that me and Gon can watch him fight. Gon needs to be prepared for his match against Hisoka, you should know that better than anyone. Shouldn't you, Ellilou?"

"Shut up! I'd love to see you fight that clown-! Actually no I wouldn't. Don't fight him. Please. Anyways... Gon needs to defeat someone here first before Hisoka will consider letting him fight him anyways. Shouldn't we be focusing on that before we focus on how to fight Hisoka? And..." I looked at Gon, then looked away. "Do you really have to fight him?"

"Ellilou, you promised you wouldn't get in the way-"

"I know what I promised, don't tell me what I promised! I'm just making sure you're willing to go out into the arena to die! Because that's what's going to happen! I'm a Zoldyck Gon, and I barely made it out! I only made it out because Hisoka decided he wanted me alive right now! You saw him in the Hunter Exam, he is after you! He wants to fight you, he wants to push your skills beyond their limits! Ultimately, he wants to kill you!"

"I know that though Ellilou! But I'd rather go into arena and die than admit defeat before the match even starts! Hisoka knows my goal is to battle him now, and he'll think even weaker of me if I back out now! I'd rather die than be underestimated and counted out like that!"

"Fine then! If that's the way you feel, then count me out of your damn circus!" I stood up, turning to look at Killua. "And I swear if you come after me Killua, I will kill you. I showed you at the Exam, I am stronger than you. You can't stop me," I turned to look at Gon again. "You don't want me to protect you? Fine! Protect your damn self! I'm done with you, I'm not going anywhere else with you and I am never returning to Whale Island! I'd rather return to the Zoldyck Estate!"

I stormed out of the hospital wing, hearing Gon call out for me as he tried to run after me. Using my assassin's speed though, I was in my room before he could get out of the hospital wing. I sat down on my bed, putting my head in my hands. Was I really ready to break ties with Gon? I knew the answer immediately. No. But I couldn't take anymore of the constant worry I had for him. and breaking ties with my blood brother I just got back was just as bad if not worse. But right now, I needed to focus on other things besides them. Like my own progress. Isn't that what I promised Killua anyways?

I slowly looked over at my ringing phone. I growled, figuring it was Killua or Gon. Then as I answered I remember they didn't have cell phones, didn't know my number, and hardly ever used the phones in our rooms. "Hello?"

"Hey, Ellilou? It's Pokkle."

I felt myself start to smile slightly, hearing the voice of one of my very few friends. "Hey Pokkle. Sorry I haven't called, I didn't have my cellphone on me and I couldn't remember your number."

"Why didn't you have your cellphone on your for a month? I've been trying to call about everyday, I was worried you'd gotten hurt."

"I-I had... I was in the hospital here at Heavens Arena. I went against Hisoka, he kinda forced me to... He could have killed me easily, but he didn't. He broke my arm, my ankle, a couple of my ribs... he sliced the side of my neck... Then he suffocated me."

"You went against Hisoka? Are you alright now? Why aren't you still in the hospital if you had all of those injuries? Ellilou, is this your whole thing about protecting Gon you had at the Exam? You know with those injuries you're in no shape-"

"Pokkle you're talking to Ellilou Zoldyck, remember that. I heal fast, just like the other Zoldycks. And uh... No, it's not about protecting Gon. In fact... I just told Killua and Gon that I wanted nothing to do with them, and to keep me out of their lives..."

"What happened that made you that mad?"

"After all the injuries I received from Hisoka, and after all the injuries he got from some other guy who doesn't even compare to Hisoka, he still wanted to fight Hisoka. He didn't back down in the slightest. He told me he'd rather die in the arena than live underestimated..."

"Oh, I see... Last time you got mad at them this bad, you met me at the Hunter Exam, right?" I mumbled a 'mhmm' into the phone. "Too bad I'm not there this time to help distract you from it. I almost came though, when you didn't answer the phone so many times. I thought you might have been killed, since... It's not that uncommon for people competing in Heavens Arena to die... But anyways."

"Heh, yeah. Too bad. I could use you right now. Even though it's your fault I shared a room with Hisoka and Illumi in the 3.5 phase." I said through my teeth, glaring at the wall with irritation of the thought. I still couldn't believe I had shared a room with my brother. I still had no idea why he didn't try to convince me out of the Exam then. He probably easily could have done it.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I just didn't want you to be stuck in a crappy room. Though, I guess a room with Hisoka and Illumi is crappier than the worst room they had..."

"Ya think?" I sighed. "Anyways... Yeah it's too bad you aren't here. I'm going to be totally alone on this floor from now on. And I've already had two people force me to fight, one guy used our friend Zushi as a puppet until I fought with him... The other was Hisoka," Chills went down my back when I thought of how close he had me pinned to the wall that day. "I used to think I would be able to be unphased by these people, be able to take on any of them and any I couldn't I could slip past. But I can't. I've never cared about being alone before... but here it's terrifying."

"Terrifying? You're scared? Are you alright, Ellilou? This isn't like you," He was right. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I felt like crying, I don't cry. But tears made their way out anyways. "Ellilou?"

"They can beat me... They can kill me... I didn't realize it until right before I passed out in my fight with Hisoka... I could die here. Gon and Killua, I always knew they could. But it didn't hit me I could too. I don't want to die here... I don't want to be here..." I heard something spark to my left, and saw the lamp on the nightstand was losing it's shape. The wires were sparking, being bent and pulled. I jumped to my feet and knocked the nightstand away from the wall, careful not to knock over the lamp. I ripped the plug to the lamp out of the wall, and sighed with relief and the wires stopped sparking.

"What was all that noise?" Pokkle asked. "Are you alright?"

"W-Well... During my match against Hisoka, things kept losing shape. The card he threw at me, when I picked it up it deformed. The floor beneath me deformed majorly at one point... And this time my lamp deformed."

"Your lamp? Alright, lets not worry about the unpredictable right now... How about I come to Heavens Arena?"

"No, absolutely not!" I yelled, jumping to my feet from where I'd been crouching. "I will not have you in this nuthouse too! There's no point for you being here, you keep your little ass wherever you are!"

"Okay, okay, calm down! How about I just come for dinner tonight? It sounds like you need someone to talk to, and I think you should be talking to them in person. And with you not speaking to Gon and Killua... I assume Leorio and Kurapika aren't anywhere nearby, so aren't I next on the list? Come on, I promise. I won't compete there."

I sighed relaxing my previously tense shoulders. "Alright, fine. Waste your money on an airship ticket here, I'll meet you down on the bottom floor. just call when you get here. Alright?"

"Alright," I felt my eye twitch. I could just tell he was grinning. "See ya then!" He hung up the phone, and I sighed as I walked to my bag. I got a change of clothes and went to the bathroom to take a shower, since they had very rarely let me take one with my injuries. I hated the hospital staff now, due the fact they made Killua stand inside the bathroom, facing the door mind you, to make sure I didn't fall with my ankle in such bad shape.

"Don't you know how to fish, Celeste?" Gon asked, having handed me his fishing pole to give it a shot. I looked at the pole in my hands, then looked at him and sighed, shaking my head. He smiled and took it back, and started telling me step-by-step how to fish. Once he got a bite on the end of the line, he taught me how to reel it in. I gave it a shot, and after a few failed attempts at casting the line, I managed to get a small fish to bite my line. I reeled it in, and looked at it. It was about as long as my hand, and was a faint pink-ish color. "Now you toss it back!"

"What an agonizing cycle..." I mumbled, tossing the fish back. I handed him his fishing rod. "But anyways, fishing is your thing. I don't want to take the fishing pole from you all day. So, I'll be back." I hopped down from our tree branch and landed on the ground below, running off into the forest. Making sure no one was watching, I extended my claws and swiftly cut a branch from it's tree, carving it into the proper shape. I rushed back to Aunt Mito's house, shaping and nailing on a reel-thing, then adding fishing line. It was sure to break, but it'd give me something to do.

I rushed back to Gon and cast my line after putting bait on it, then waited for a fish to bite. When it did, I found out my homemade fishing rod was sufficient. Gon high-fived me, grinning. "Good job, Ellilou! Maybe someday you can made professional fishing rods! I still wanna know where you got a branch like that though, those usually stay on the trees."

"This one must of just had a lot of small ones fall on it and get caught and add more and more weight onto it until it snapped or something. Or maybe it broke off during a storm or something. Who knows." Gon shrugged, and we both went back to fishing.

As I scrubbed my head, I questioned why that memory came to mind. Maybe it was because now that I was going to separate from them, I'd miss stuff like that. Just relaxing and having fun with Gon. I hadn't even gotten the chance to do that will Killua yet. While I was in the hospital, he had to nen train with Gon. I needed to stop thinking about them, but those two wouldn't leave my mind. Not that that was anything new, they never had.

"Hey there, shouldn't you be going headed home? It's getting late; your parents might worry about you!" A spikey-black-haired kid asked. His bright brown eyes were on me as he stopped walking behind me. I turned to face him.

"How do you know I'm not headed home right now?"

"There are no houses up that way," The kid said, pointing up the hill I was going up. "Well, besides a few. But I know those people, and they don't have a daughter who looks like you! I've never seen you around here before, do you live here on Whale Island?" I looked at the kid, crossing my arms.

"Maybe I'm not, what's it to you? Does it really matter what I'm doing? Does it affect you? I don't think so. So you can go on with your business."

"B-But you look lonely! Where are your parents at?" I looked away from him, searching for an excuse to give him. This kid was persistent, I could tell he would give if I told him to butt-out. I sighed.

"My parents docked here previously, and we got off the ship to conduct business. Well, they did. And they told me to step out for a few minutes, so I did. After an hour of waiting, I went back to see where they were. The man they'd been talking to said they'd already left. So basically, my parents forgot I was here." I turned away from him, but he grabbed my hand.

"S-So you're alone now? You don't have any family? Can we contact your aunts or uncles? Or your grandparents?"

"Both of my parents were the only child, and my grandparents are all dead. So no, there's no family we can contract. I'm fine on my own, I've been taught how to take care of myself."

"Aww, come on! At least come eat dinner at my house, you're hungry! I can see it! You're all skinny, and you look hungry and... And... Come on!" The boy took my hand and started pulling me with him as he headed in some other direction. I could have easily pulled out of his grip, but some part of me didn't want to. I'd been on starvation training for a month now, I hadn't been allowed to eat in Heaven's Arena the past month. They would have found out somehow, which would have resulted in severe punishment. I was hungry enough to eat every last scrap of food in the Zoldyck Estate, and to be honest it didn't sound too bad to eat and not have to look at my family.

Eventually we reached a house on the top of a hill, and he pulled me inside. A lady with red hair came into the small room in the front, giving me a somewhat weary smile when she saw me. She then looked at the boy next to me and put her hands on her hips, looking much like a parent about to snap at her child. Or at least that's what I'd seen on tv. "Gon Freecss, what have I told you about bringing your friends home this late?"

"B-But Aunt Mito! I have a reason for bringing here here! Her parents forgot her at shore and they haven't come back for her, she hasn't eaten Aunt Mito. And she has no where to stay! We can't just let here fend for herself." I was glaring at the wall to the right of the woman from my point of view, refusing to look at either of them. I didn't want help, I could fend for myself easily. To be honest though, it'd go against what I'd just fought with my 'father' over. I would have to at least injure someone if not murder. Or at least I assumed no one was nice enough to allow me to stay in there home without inviting me.

The lady, Mito, looked at me and blinked, seeming shocked. I honestly couldn't make out why. What did it matter? I had nothing to do with her, I'd never met her before. More likely than not, I'd never been within a hundred miles of the lady. I'd never done anything for her. Did she want a favor in return for helping me? I crossed my arms as she spoke. "How long ago has it been since your parents forgot you at shore? Have you eaten since? I am going to have a word with your parents when they come back for you!"

"More likely than not they won't. They can't break their trade route, they could lose millions just for being an hour late, more less days. Which is the time it'll take for them to get to their next destination. Not to mention the fact it could cost them the deal entirely."

"Your own child should be more important than money! They can replace and regain money, they can't replace their child!"

"You do have to have money to support a child and keep them alive. And you can regain a child."

"You can what?" Aunt Mito's eyes widened at me as she remembered Gon was there. She gave me a look that warned me not to bring that up again, and though I wasn't afraid of her I decided not to. She sighed and looked at me.

"Well, you can stay here until your parents come to get you. I'll tell the men down at the docks to keep an eye out for two parents looking for their child."

"I'd be surprised if they came back at all. They probably won't. You shouldn't bother, you don't seem to be the kind of person who would want to ask me to leave like I was some sort of friend who overstayed their visit."

"If your parents don't come to look for you then I'll have our sailors get the word out that we have a child with missing parents. If by some chance they're never found, then we'll keep you. I'm not just going to put a young child out on the streets. It wouldn't be ri-"

"I'm not that young. I'm eight. I can handle myself," Then I remembered, typically eight year olds didn't have the survival skills of an eighty year old. I sighed. "Nevermind."

"No eight year old has all the knowledge you need for surviving. Besides, you'll be taken in by the police and forced to stay with them if they find you wandering without parents. You look really hungry sweety, come on." The lady took my hand and pulled me with her, catching me off guard. Typically when someone took my hand, it was to hurt me in some way or another. Flip me, pin me, train me. It never meant anything good.

I was led to a room, where she left me standing by a chair. A older lady was already sitting across the table, and steaming food was in the middle. I felt my stomach practically jump for joy. Then I questioned whether these were people asked to find me by my family. The boy - I mean Gon, I don't typically pay attention to names - pulled a chair out from the table and smiled at me. After a second I realized he intended for me to sit there, so I sighed and did.

After I sat down, they all started making their plates. I didn't really know what I was allowed to have, every night at home I was only allowed a certain amount. Gon blinked at me, tilting his head. "What's wrong? You can make your plate now... I... I don't know your name." Instead of dealing with his issue over my name, I slowly started giving myself tiny portions of food.

"You can eat as much as you want, sweety. You don't have to worry about eating too much, we make plenty, Typically we have too much anyways." Mito said, smiling at me. Slowly I nodded, then began filling my plate to my heart's content. They all bowed their heads with their eyes shut, and I just stared. I hadn't the slightest clue as to what they were doing, but I pretended to do it to. I heard them move, so I opened my eyes and started eating. Apparently they had too, so at least I didn't screw up there. I never lifted my head though, I didn't feel like looking at them.

"Are you okay, dear?" The lady across the table asked. I nodded without looking up and kept eating. The food was really good, I wasn't sure what was so different about it. Maybe it was because it wasn't created by five-star chefs. I'd heard on tv before that there was a difference, but I never bothered to remember what it was. I heard them start chatting about what Gon'd done that day, but I didn't bother to pay attention. I was shocked when I realized like I felt like I was intruding. What did I care?

After dinner, Mito pulled an air mattress out for me to sleep on. She laid it down in Gon's room, and that was that. Gon laid down on his bed, and I laid down on my mattress. I wasn't the biggest fan of sleeping in unfamiliar surroundings, but it didn't take too entirely long for me to fall asleep.

When I woke up, it wasn't because of my eternal alarm clock for my training or Heaven's Arena schedule. I realized my hand was around someone's throat, and that someone was Gon. He looked terrified, and i quickly removed my hand. "Why were you by my bed!?"

"Y-You looked cold... So I brought you a blanket," He said, pointing to the blanket now draped over my lower body. "I-I'm sorry."

"No, no. It's not your fault... I was just trained to- ... attack if someone got near me in my sleep, ya know. You can't trust everybody on the ships."

"Oh, okay. Sorry to have startled you, you just looked really cold. So I wanted to help."

"It's fine, really. You just caught me off guard. Are you alright? I'm sorry." I was just glad I was taught to just stop the person, not kill them. When I asked Illumi why we didn't kill them, he said it was so that we could get information out of them as to why they tried to come near us. I was satisfied with the answer, especially since it meant I didn't have to kill extra people. And though it may seem odd, interrogating was my favorite part of missions. It pleased my family, and it was fun finding out what made people talk.

"It's okay! Don't worry about it!" Gon said, smiling brightly at me. "Sleep tight,- I still never learned your name. Will you tell it to me, please?"

"I... My name is... Celeste." I had no place of origin for the name. Maybe it was from tv show I watched, a book I read, or someone I murdered. But now it was me. Gon smiled at me and nodded.

"Sleep tight, Celeste!" I watched him go back over to his bed and lay down, then I slowly sank back down to laying down on my own bed. I pulled the blanket over me, realizing there was a ghost feeling of coldness in the room. I slowly closed my eyes, hoping that didn't happen again. The fear in people's eyes is always what made me want to stop assassinating. Seeing it in his happy-go-lucky eyes because of my doing was one of the worst feelings I'd felt.

I shut the water off and stepped out of the shower. After drying off, I got dressed into another black sleeveless shirt like my previous one, which I wore over a white tank top par usual. I put on a blue jean jacket with elbow-length sleeves over it, and khaki pants identical to my previous black ones. I put back on my black boots, then brushed my hair out some more. Once it was it's typical self, I left the bathroom. I watched tv until my cellphone rang. "Hello?"

"I'm down here on the bottom level."

"You doofus you should have called me at the airport so I could have could've met you there! Didn't I tell you, Hisoka is here! Not to mention a bunch of others just as bad! Well maybe not Hisoka bad but... You know what I mean! Are all of my friends suicidal!?"

"Sorry, sorry. Come meet me?"

"Yeah yeah, I'm coming." I hung up the phone and headed downstairs. I completely ignored Hisoka when I passed him, and headed down to the bottom floor. I nodded at the elevator girl as thanks, which was much more than Killua and Gon ever seemed to give her. I headed to the front door, where I immediately recognized the peach-orange haired boy who awaited me. He was leaning against the wall, staring at the ceiling. When he saw me he smiled, straightening up.

"Hey there, Ellilou. Feel any better?"

"I don't want to talk about it." After my recollection of memories in the shower, I wanted to hug Gon. I knew he meant well, he wanted to prove himself. Just like I had wanted to prove to Silva I could make it without killing people. But it still made me so mad that he didn't even consider how much he worried me, and didn't seem to care when I tried to explain it to him.

"Maybe being with your friend will help. Come on, lets go eat." He turned and headed out, and I followed behind him. Once we got close to the area where the restaurants would be, we were in a crowd as dense as Gon and Killua.

"We're gonna get split up at this rate..." I mumbled under my breath, and evidently Pokkle heard me. Whether that was unfortunate or not, I'll get back to you on that. As if by some automatic response, he grabbed my hand and started navigating us through the crowd. I felt a sharp chill go down my back, an oddly familiar feeling. I stopped us, yanking him back my way since he tried to continue on. "Pokkle, we've been trying to find an uncrowded restaurant for ten minutes. We're taking what we get."

We went inside and were seated at a booth for two somewhere near the back of the seating tables. It was completely dark besides the blue and green neon lights lining the tables, chairs, booth seats, and the area where you get a hostess to seat you. Believe it or not, though it didn't illuminate the room, it was easy to see people and objects. I sat down across from Pokkle, looking at the electronic menu handed to me. Pokkle and I looked up. "Sushi."

We both started laughing as we recalled our second phase of the exam. "Of course, that would be the one thing they had. Stupid Menchi, ruining sushi for us." I commented, reading the menu. There were at least fifty types of sushi listed, but that was all they had, minus drinks and dessert. "Do you even know the difference here?"

"Not a clue. You?"

I paused a second, recalling some of the types from home. "Actually, I do. Well a few." I recommended my favorite type to him, then we electronically put in our order. The devices they gave us evidently were their form of waiters. There was a button to send for someone to fill our drinks, to order, to give us our bill. This seemed like something I would have only imagined my family to come up with.

Once we placed our orders were placed, Pokkle looked at me. "So, are you fully recovered from your injuries?"

"For the most part. The doctors 'recommended' I didn't fight until I got used to walking and such again. I promised Killua I'd wait, but since he doesn't matter anymore-"

"You should wait, Ellilou. You don't need to push yourself, you should still have plenty of time to register for another match. There's no point of fighting and hurting yourself further. Just relax. Alright?"

I looked at him, a bit shocked at his concern. I half expected for him to laugh and to tell me he was joking, to go out there and fight until I was in pieces. But he didn't. He had a serious look on his face I wasn't used to receiving from anybody but Gon or Killua. I slowly nodded. "A-Alright. I'll wait." He smiled, and our sushi very soon arrived. For the first few minutes, it was quiet. Then Pokkle looked at me.

"Are you sure you want to stay here and be by yourself? You scared me on the phone, during the exam you seemed so confident in yourself. You seemed like you couldn't care less about how strong the other people around you were, you seemed like you thought you could take any of them down in an instant. You didn't take any of their strengths into consideration."

"You're right, I didn't. I thought I could take any of them down. But I was wrong. I couldn't have taken Hisoka down... He... He could have easily killed Gon."

"I think the outcome would have been different if Gon had been in danger-"

"Yeah yeah, I know. I heard the same thing from Killua. But that's no guarantee. So I have to train to be stronger, so I can take them all down if I need to. Even though I'm not protecting them anymore. I need to be able to protect myself."

"Haven't you already done enough training? You sound like your older brother right now."

"Ugh, don't compare me to him. Everyone needs to train to be stronger, even if it's not hardcore like the Zoldycks. It could still help. I'm not going to go Zoldyck-crazy or anything, I just need to sharpen my skills a little bit."

"Aren't they sharp enough Miss Monster Claws?"

"No, Mr. Bow-And-Arrow."

"Seriously Ellilou, didn't you want to be normal? You're already inhumanly strong, making yourself stronger isn't going to plead your case."

"If I'm inhumanly strong, then it's not that uncommon. Since there are a ton of people in Heavens Arena stronger than me."

"You give yourself a lot less credit than you deserve. Not a lot of people can beat them, Ellilou. You're strong enough, you don't need to beat them. It's okay for there to be people stronger than you. How do you think I feel? A girl younger than me could kill me quicker than she could blink!"

"Are you questioning the speed of my blinking?"

"Not the point!" I sighed, noticing his frustration. "Ellilou, listen. You don't need to be alone here at Heaven's Arena. You either need to make up with Gon and Killua, or make ally!"

I sighed again, nodding. "Alright, I'll do one. Most likely the latter. Though I'm not sure I'd trust anyone here..."

"Ellilou, if it's bad enough for you to admit you're scared, you need to either leave, or have people familiar to you. You shouldn't be alone here."

"I told you I'd do one or the other, Pokkle. I'm not going to lie to you. If I was going to do that, I wouldn't have admitted that I was scared. I don't admit to Killua or Gon that I'm scared ninety-nine percent of the time. You should feel lucky you caught me at such a weak moment."

"It was actually nice to hear you weren't blindly confident... You could get killed too easily if you were over-confident..."

"I know that, Pokkle. There's a reason Illumi always preached to me not to fight an opponent stronger than me, as much as I absolutely hate to admit it." I looked at the remainder of my sushi, it suddenly being unappetizing. Though when I went to push my almost half full plate away, I got a look from Pokkle advising to do otherwise. I picked at my sushi in silence for awhile, and eventually we left.

As we walked down the street, I felt the odd feeling from before slowly get stronger. As we neared Heaven's Arena, it started to become overwhelming. I dropped to my knees at the front door, wanting to collapse completely. I heard footsteps in front of me, and heard Pokkle growl. I looked up to see my older brother, his long black hair still lighter than his cold black eyes. "It's time for you to come home."

"N-N..." The feeling became stronger, making me want to scream. "Y-Yes sir..."

"Stand up."

"I can't... You're keeping me from standing up." The feeling slowly eased off just enough for me to stand. I couldn't understand Pokkle's muffled words, as if they were being drowned out. But when I heard him start to run at Illumi, I put my arm out to stop him. "Get out of here Pokkle. You can't interfere. I've told you before and I'll tell you again, he'll kill you. Just get out of here."

"Ellilou-"

"Now, damn it!" I yelled, closing my eyes. I wouldn't turn to face him. I never learned where he went, everything blacked out.

Yes, Red-chan is the goddess of Pokkle writing.