Kaya woke up in the med bay and sat up, breathing deeply into her back and giving it a satisfying crack. Then memories of the night before flooded back, sharp and painful. Across from her, Joker was propped up in his bed, looking at a data pad.

Kaya felt her breath catch in her throat. She should say something. Apologize. She opened her mouth, brows knit together as she tried to find an appropriate way of saying "I'm sorry I almost killed you with a chair."

Joker smiled. "Don't."

"I thought I was the psychic one," she said softly.

"Everyone on this ship. Every single goddamned person. Everyone has nightmares. We've all be to hell and back, somewhere. Some people were on Earth, fighting in the resistance when the Reapers attacked. Some of us have stuck with Shepard, and there's a whole host of PTSD-inducing stories right there.

"I was flying the Normandy when the Collectors boarded and took everyone. It was just me. For a solid hour, all alone, before Shepard and the gang got back. It was hell. Agony. If I had biotics, you can be damn sure I'd have thrown some chairs around, too. So don't apologize. And don't think no one here understands."

Kaya could feel tears welling in her eyes. She impatiently brushed them away and felt a sizable bandage on her right temple. She fiddled with it a bit, wondering how bad the damage was. There had been a lot of blood.

"Thanks," she said with a forced smile, hugging her knees into her chest. "Although I'm not sure that's what I needed to hear. It wasn't one of my nightmares. Apparently these enhanced psychic abilities mean I get to share in all of yours."

"Well, shit."

Kaya studied the sudden concern in Joker's face and really wished she had kept her mouth shut.

"How badly did I mess you up, anyway?" she asked, trying what she could to steer the conversation away from herself.

Joker raised his eyebrows in surprise at the question, but he gave her the rundown. "Broken sternum, four fractured ribs, fractured hip, broken wrist. I've had worse. Besides, that's what cybernetics are for. It's already healing."

"Seriously?"

"Oh, yeah. The first time the Collectors attacked the ship. When the Normandy crashed after the Reapers were taken down. The attack on the Collector base was pretty bad, too. Trust me, I'll be okay. No grudges or anything. ... You were more interested in the healing rate, weren't you?"

"Maybe. But that's good," Kaya said. "I'm pretty sure getting on the pilot's bad side is bad luck."

"You can keep believing that's a thing. I'm okay with that," Joker said with a smile.

Joker turned back to his datapad, and they sat in silence for a while. Unbidden, Kaya found herself exploring Joker's mind before she could actively arrest herself. There was a darkness there, a reason the smiles and jokes did not quite meet his eyes. There was a hole.

EDI. Enhanced Defense Intelligence.

Something from earlier made sense. A pang of guilt, as Shepard looked over to Joker lying on the floor. Not related to the situation at hand. She just always felt guilty around Joker.

She had made the decision. She knew what she was sacrificing. She still had not been able to tell anyone but Garrus. Even Hackett didn't know.

Only now do I feel truly alive. That was your influence.

Kaya felt a sob rising in her throat. She turned away from Joker and looked out the window into the Mess, chastising herself for going down that rabbit hole. All around her, there was so much loss. Then again, the shared experience made things easier, somehow. She could focus on their problems and emotions instead of her own pain.

Dr. Chakwas was talking to Engineer Adams over by the kitchen island. She saw Kaya looking through the med bay window and stood up.

"Looks like my other patient is finally awake," the doctor said upon entering the room. She ran some scans, but everything looked pretty normal. "Your implants are healing well. I'm going to give you a sedative to take each night, though. Too much biotics at the start of an implant's life can do some permanent neural damage."

Thank god. If Kaya never had another dream again, it would be too soon. She did not need to go storming about through everyone else's nightmares.

"How badly did I hit my head, doc?" Kaya asked, touching her bandage.

"Nothing too serious. We applied some Medi-Gel. The bandage is to keep you from scratching it off. The scars will be healed in a couple of days."

"The wonders of modern medicine. Seriously," Kaya said shaking her head. She had read up a little on Medi-Gel. She could only imagine having it on hand during her ER rotation in school. The number of lives it could have saved, especially after that big earthquake her fourth year.

"You know, if you want to continue with your studies, I'm always around," Dr. Chakwas offered.

"That … that would be amazing, actually," Kaya said with a smile. "I mean, I can't be an Alliance prisoner forever. Eventually they're gonna have to let me go live my life. Getting back to medicine would be nice."

"You're not our prisoner, Kaya," Joker interjected.

"Really? So if I just decided to get off the ship next time we docked, that would be okay?" Kaya gave a somewhat bitter laugh. She had not realized until right now how annoying her lack of freedom was. "Come on, Joker. I'm a valuable fucking asset to the Alliance. So much so that they put the savior of the damn galaxy in charge of babysitting me."

"Protecting you," Joker shot back. "There could be more psychopath mad scientists out there, who want to bring you along for their next round of Skyllian Five."

"What?"

"It's like poker."

"I'm sure that's what the mad scientists have in mind."

"That's what I would do. Take you on a professional circuit. Make bank."

"You wouldn't … oh, I don't know … want to steal some state secrets to sell to terrorists?"

"Nah, too predictable. And evil."

"Well, we could always just break out of here. Or steal the ship. Become professional poker playing pirates."

"Say that five times fast," Joker laughed.

Kaya felt a little twinge in her chest, though she wasn't sure who it belonged to. That had been happening since they got her off Omega. A laugh or pain that wasn't her own, but it almost felt like it was. It didn't happen often, which was nice. It seemed to be limited to strong emotions and close physical proximity. And on a ship this size, that was a particularly important blessing. Kaya had enough of her own angst to worry about.

Still, whether it was her or Jeff that had felt a little flutter of happiness, Kaya was pretty sure she had made a friend. She smiled. That was sorely needed right now.