"You're all I have now" Danielle whispered as she cradled Amy in her arms. "You and your mummy" Danielle added, wanting to acknowledge her gratitude to Roxy even if she was only talking to a baby. As she lay Amy down in her coat she couldn't help but admire her beautiful cousin; her wispy blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes that slowly faded away as her eyes lids shut.
"How you feeling?" Roxy asked gently, slightly nervous of Danielle's response. She had been listening to her niece whispering to Amy for the last few minutes, not wanting to interrupt the moment. Roxy knew that if Danielle was to try and repair her life in Walford then Amy would be an important part of that.
Roxy passed the glass to Danielle as they headed into the lounge. Roxy threw herself onto the couch; Danielle joining her nervously. As she glanced over to see Roxy looking at her Danielle tried to distract herself. She placed the glass on the coffee table and shuffled her eyes round the room instead whilst still feeling the glare of Roxy's stare fixed on her.
Danielle's eyes moved from one object to another; the room felt cluttered to Danielle, so many things crammed into such a small space. But as Danielle concentrated on each item she realised that they were connected to family; from the row of photo frames on the drawer to the collection of family china sitting pride of place on the shelf.
She couldn't help fix her eyes on the photos, the Mitchell family staring back at her. Even though these photos displayed everything that Danielle had ever dreamed of, their presence made her nervous. Each pair of eyes and deceptive smile were reminders of what she had been missing all her life, what she felt she had lost all over again.
The space she had made on the mantle still remained. Danielle choked as she realised that the bag she had packed for Amy was gone from the hallway, along with her photo. She started to cough, trying to hide her momentary panic. She looked resolutely away from Roxy, refusing to even face her, let alone look her in the eye.
"I shouldn't be here," Danielle gulped. "Ronnie threw me out. Not just at the wedding but when I was taking care of Amy. She said she didn't want me here, that I shouldn't go near her family."
"Danielle you are family and this is your home now, if you want it to be?" Roxy asked tentatively, hoping that she wasn't pushing Danielle to fast. Danielle heard Roxy's question, she just wanted the sofa to swallow her up. Even though she knew deep down that the answer was "yes", Danielle couldn't forget the pain and hurt of the last few months. Being in the flat were Ronnie rejected her brought back the painful memories that just wouldn't disappear.
"This is just too much" Danielle muttered, dropping her eyes to the floor. "I'm sorry you came all that way to pick me up but I can't, I just can't" Danielle said quickly as her legs began to shake, tears once again brimming in her eyes. Danielle went to stand up, ready to run away from everyone and everything until she felt a firm hand take hold of her arm.
"No you don't" Roxy said firmly, pulling Danielle back down onto the sofa. As Danielle fell back onto the seat her body went limb, her body dissolving into the couch as her legs continued to shake. She wanted to get back and just keep running but she felt Roxy leaning over her forcefully, all her weight holding Danielle down.
"I have only just got you back, you're not getting away that easily" Roxy managed to joke. But Danielle wasn't listening. The emotion and strength she had felt had drained away, leaving the broken and scared little girl cowering on the couch. Roxy immediately noticed that it was no time to joke.
"Come here" Roxy whispered gently, leaning forward to wrap her arms around Danielle. Danielle was so pressed into the back of the couch that Roxy could feel herself falling over as she hugged her niece. As she tried to pull away she felt Danielle's arms grip tighter around hers, refusing to let go.
With her body held firmly in place by Danielle Roxy just managed to arc her head round to look at Danielle. She was devastated to see her sobbing hysterically, her body shaking uncontrollably. It was painful enough to watch anyone, any stranger so distressed but when it was someone you loved the pain and sorrow felt ten times worse.
Danielle and Roxy sat opposite each other on the sofa. Roxy had finally managed to peel Danielle off her, making her drink some water to calm down. "What happened between you and Ronnie?" Roxy asked gently, trying to get Danielle to open up and talk about her feelings. But if she was anything like her mother then it would be a hard task.
"She didn't want me, she said...look it doesn't matter ok. It doesn't matter what happened, it's over. I don't care anymore" Danielle admitted. Roxy could see how conflicted Danielle was, whilst the anger still simmered in Danielle, her shaky voice revealed her pain and sadness as she spoke.
"She does want you" Roxy said, trying to reason with Danielle. "And me and Amy want you here" Roxy continued, smiling gently at Danielle. "Giving you up was the worst thing Ronnie ever did, she has regretted it her whole life" As Roxy spoke she noticed Danielle's eyes blink, her face hardening. "She told me that giving me away was the best thing she ever did!" Danielle cried, she felt tears brimming in her eyes once again as they began to trawl over the painful memories.
"She loves you more than anything" Roxy said, lightly stroking her palm over Danielle's tear-stained cheek. "Then why, why did she treat me like that?" Danielle cried again, pulling her head back sharply away from Roxy's hand.
"I don't know everything that happened between you..." Roxy replied. Although it sounded like a hint, part of Roxy didn't want to hear the pain her sister had caused her own daughter. "But when Ronnie lost you she changed, she closed down. She doesn't mean to but she lashes out at the people that get close to her" Roxy admitted, she hated bad mouthing her sister but Danielle deserved the truth.
"Doesn't mean to? She knew what she was doing! She knew...she meant every word. She's heartless. She never wanted me, she told me so. She said that having her baby was the biggest mistake of her life! She, she...." Danielle's voice trailed off. Even though her mind was racing with all the times Ronnie had hurt her, she struggled to get her words out, the memories to painful to describe.
As Danielle broke down Roxy tried to comfort her niece. As she wrapped her arms around Danielle she could feel how cold and distant she still felt. Even after all the anger she was vented about Ronnie, Roxy knew she was the one person Danielle needed more than anyone at the moment.