Chapter 11
He couldn't just leave it like this. A few minutes ago he was the one who walked away. He had to go after her, just as she did. But what if she didn't want to talk to him? She was really angry.
He went with his hands through his hair, she was right, he made this decision not even considering Michaela's feelings.
Jumping up from his seat, he looked in the direction she had walked to. "Damnit!" He couldn't see her anymore.
Running along the street he felt lost; he had no idea where he was. She couldn't be that far, he had to find her. He kept on walking, and somehow it lead him to a small park. There she was, sitting on a swing which hung under an oak tree. Her cheeks were covered with tears. He had made her cry, again. Approaching her slowly he quietly called her name.
She looked at him but didn't say anything. He was leaving her, what would be the point to talk to him?
"You have every right to be angry, would you please listen to me?" he was almost begging her.
Out of frustration he clenched his hands to fists; how could he have been so stupid? He needed to tell her what was on his mind. "This is not how I planned to tell you. On my way to Boston I played it in my head over and over again." Trying to control his own fears he sighed deeply.
"Tell me what? That you don't want to spend your life with me?" Now it was Michaela's turn to be angry.
"That's not what I meant; I don't want to lose you, Michaela. I see the passion in your eyes when you walk around in the hospital. That's what I want too, and I can't have it here. Michaela, I discovered that I'm a man of nature. School just isn't for me. Do you understand? But how can I be happy when I'm not with you? That's what this trip has taught me."
He got down on his knees so he could look into her eyes. "I want you, need you! Michaela you are a part of me. We have to find a solution for all this mess," he pleaded.
"How? Sully, you say you need to change your whole life, is there a place for me somewhere? I'm not giving up my dreams, becoming a doctor is all I ever wanted. Sully, I need to know something like this won't happen again. It just hurts too much." Her tears were still flowing.
He touched her hand, and she didn't pull away.
"Do you love me?" he asked. Between her sobs he saw her head shaking yes. "And I love you!"
"It will never work, Sully."
"Believe me, I've thought about this a lot. Yes, I want to help Cloud Dancing but not if it means being away from you." He needed to let her know she was what matters to him most.
"I don't know... this is too complicated." Michaela shook her head in desperation.
"Do you want to be with me?"
"Yes, but…."
He lifted her fingers to his lips. "Sshhh…" He saw her tears well up again. "First we need to figure out to what medical school you want to go. From there on we'll make plans. The last few weeks have shown me my way. It's you. Yes, my ideas have changed; I want to pursue my dream living out in the wilderness. I'm sure there is going to be a way to do it together. Michaela, I'm not leaving you, I want to be with you. We'll sort things out.
"Maybe I can become a tour guide near your university; this way I can be outside and still be with you. We can go to Cloud Dancing together." His mind was making all kinds of jumps.
Her mind was also planning, thinking this might actually work. Both would be happy at what they were doing. Michaela got up and turned her back toward him. "I need to think about this Sully."
Sully's heart grew heavy.
"This will be a bumpy road. There are so many things we need to figure out. But we are going to make it. Michaela, there are no maps that can show us the way. I'm willing to travel without one. Are you?" Sully asked.
There were so many questions going through her mind. "I don't know," she said in a low voice.
"Look at me." Sully bent his hands around her small shoulders so she would turn around. Lifting her chin with one hand, he reasoned, "I know we're young, but there is nothing that I need more than you. You live not only in my mind but my heart can't go on without you."
How could she not want to be with him; this was her soul mate! So she told him, "Yes, I am. We will set our destinations and find our own road," she answered his previous question.
With these last words they sealed the vow they just made with an intense kiss.
Sully withdrew a bit, foreheads still touching. What he saw in her eyes was relieve and happiness. "We are going to make it," he whispered.
She gave him her crooked smile. "We need to talk about this more," she told him. He nodded and gave her a small kiss onto the nose, "We will."
They spent the next hour discussing their future, both remembering that they wanted to be together whatever the outcome would be.
After they finished their talk Michaela had one more thing on her mind. "There is already one small bump," she told him.
Sully sat back in confusion. She laughed, "The ball. Sully, will you dance with me?"
Sully shook his head, "I can't dance."
"I'll teach you." She jumped up, and the rest of the afternoon was spent with laughter, sharing small kisses and trying to teach Sully how to dance.
Michaela didn't succeed; she was a bit disappointed but knew it wasn't as important since they had solved the biggest problem between them. A dance was just a dance.
It was yesterday since Michaela and Sully had their talk. Although it seemed impossible, they grew closer and closer with every new day.
This afternoon Michaela went with her father to the hospital. He wanted to show her the ins and outs of his department.
Her father had talked with so much passion and excitement about it, but her mind was occupied on how she should break the news to him. She needed to tell him that his dream for her working by his side wouldn't come true.
There was still some time before it came to this, but she had never been good in keeping things for herself this long. She talked to Sully about it and he agreed with her that waiting would be too hard for all of them. He suggested they would both talk to her father. Michaela said she could handle it, but standing here now she wasn't sure anymore. When she had left this afternoon Sully had taken her aside and whispered encouraging words to her. Maybe it would have been better if he was by her side, but it was too late now.
Gathering all her will-power she stopped her father from walking out of his office. "Father, may I speak to you for a moment?"
Josef turned around, looked over his glasses and saw in his youngest daughter's face that this was something serious.
Taking off his jacket he sat behind his desk, pointing to Michaela to do the same across from him. He didn't say anything, waiting for his daughter to start.
There was a small pause before she started. "Father, I …" Michaela couldn't finish, she was interrupted by a knock on the door.
"One moment," Josef walked toward the door.
Michaela looked at the ceiling. "Why now?" she sighed.
Overhearing the conversation at the door she got curious.
"What a surprise, come in, come in."
Michaela looked at the man who interrupted them. "Sully? What are you doing here?"
"Rebecca dropped me here, I wanted to pick you up and go for a walk," Sully explained. "That is, if you are ready to go." He saw her startled face. "I can come back later, if you want."
"No, it's alright. Please stay." He saw her pleading eyes and lowered himself on the chair beside her.
"Mike was about to tell me something." Josef sat opposite the young couple.
Sully took her hand when Michaela began, "Father, I decided to search for a medical school in Colorado." She spoke so fast that Josef had to listen closely.
"I love it in Colorado Springs and I'm convinced that I made the right decision." She looked at Sully who gave her hand a light squeeze. She continued. "We both know what we want. And we're going to face it together, Sully and I."
Josef was stunned. What was his daughter telling him? He needed to digest this for a moment. It became silent.
"Father?"
Josef got up from his chair turned towards the window and then started, "Why this sudden turn? We agreed that you would come and learn at my hospital. I don't understand. Why this sudden turn of events?" He pivoted around. "Who convinced you to do this?"
And his eyes turned towards Sully.