Absent

Chapter 11

Lost Heaven

Riza had intended to pay more attention to the scenery on the drive back to East City in an attempt to validate the theory that this was all recycled memories, but she couldn't stop thinking about her predicament long enough to pay attention to the pastures and farmhouses. Hayate kept his paw on his leg as he slept and she knew he was trying to reassure her, but she still couldn't help but feel lost. It was a horrible feeling knowing she was trapped inside her own mind. All of this was her creation and she couldn't find her way out of it. Every "what-if" scenario she had ever conceived was hidden somewhere in this world and it all was out there waiting for her.

The problem was she was without anyone to turn to that might have specialized in neurological alchemy. That was what alternative Riza had to be telling her, was that she couldn't possibly activate this array without understanding all the nuances of that science. It was hard to recall if the boys had researched that in their quest to bring back their bodies, perhaps they had spoken to Roy about it at some point? She might not know about that specialty, but the fact that some part of her brain recognized it in order to tell her that...meant she had come across it at some point.

Even though she was privy to information about local alchemists due to Roy's job, she didn't memorize their specialties like he did. He was the one who was the highest ranking alchemist in East City, so it fell under his purview to monitor all state alchemists in the region, ensure they were aware of upcoming assessments and report to General Basque Grand, head of the alchemist Corps, in Central. A lot of names had gone through their office over the years and occasionally he would share their skills or specialties, but overall it was mostly a bureaucratic process. Names, folders, signatures, filing. It wasn't personal and alchemists were not personable.

In her heart she truly believed Roy, Ed and Al capable of anything. Unfortunately that was a broad spectrum of anything; from complete destruction to accomplishing the impossible. That was what worried her was that knowledge that things could and would go wrong when dealing with alchemy and each one of those alchemists had been already scarred by their powers. This reality was, after all, constructed from her darkest fears.

The trip to East City was uneventful, not that she was expecting any different. She brought the car back to the motor pool and signed it back in without so much as a blink of the eye from the Sargent on duty. She left the lot and walked back out onto the street and checked her watch. It was getting close to noon so she didn't want to run into anyone going to lunch. Unfortunately that was not how her day was going to go. No sooner did she think it than it happened.

"Lieutenant!"

She turned, hopeful as ever that things were back to normal. Roy was next to his car with the Elric brothers in the back seat looking at her through the rear window. He was smiling and gave her a wave. "Sir?"

"You could join us for lunch?" Roy asked hopefully. He was being too pushy. Dammit. "No pressure, I know you're coming by this evening, but since I saw you I thought you might...be hungry."

It was amazing to see him so awkward at conversation. How was this Roy so innocent? How in the hell did her mind ever come up with this version of him? She walked over and saw he was just standing there with his car door open smiling, trying not to listen to Ed barking at him to 'shut up, oh my god this is why you will die alone!'. Then it struck her that the reason he was tongue tied was because he was smitten...with her. He wasn't like this when they first talked in his office yesterday but after last night he truly was interested in her and was eager to see more of her. That...was probably something they skipped over in their relationship. They danced around each other a little at her father's funeral but things got familiar again so fast that they skipped this stage of their relationship completely. They had never dated and now she was getting the chance. It was also a chance to be with people that were familiar and she needed that comfort right now. "I'd love to."

Roy darted around to the other side of the car and opened the passenger door. "Great!"

Riza walked over and could hear Ed mumbling in the back seat but it did nothing to damper Roy's smile. He was completely fixated on her. It was strange, this idea was somehow seated in the back of her mind that he could be happy without her but that he would still be attracted to her even if they didn't have a history. She got in and sat down and Roy waited for Hayate to jump in her lap even though Al opened the back door to offer him a seat with them. The doors closed and she heard a whisper from the back.

"He's not a loser, he's just doesn't have a lot of time to date." It was Ed. Of course it was Ed.

"It's so good to see you again!" Al said and reached forward to pet Hayate. "We've been working on your coin project. It's really fortunate we ran into you so you two don't have to talk about it on your date tonight, we can all help you with it now."

Riza smiled at him. Sweet Al trying to pave the way for a real date and also ensure they had a chance to size her up. She always did feel like he had a future in diplomacy if he ever wanted it. "I appreciate your assistance on this. It's something I just can't forget about until I figure it out."

They boys nodded enthusiastically. They understood and they also were excited Roy was dating someone who understood that feeling.

Roy opened the door and got in. He barely gave anyone a chance to brace themselves before he shifted into drive and pulled into traffic without looking.

Lunch was probably the most normal event she had participated in thus far. It wasn't uncharacteristic for Roy to treat the boys to a meal when they were in town, although he was never this nice about it. He usually tried to play it off as a reason to get out of the office and would flirt shamelessly with the waitress, but he always made sure that Ed got a chance to sit down and eat. Ed, having the chance to eat with Roy footing the bill, ensured the kid got the largest meal he had in probably a month. They would usually settle into a truce of sorts to enjoy their meal, both being raised to have manners at the table, but they weren't this well behaved. There would always be snide remarks and insults and smirks and kicks in the shin, today it was more like a family meal.

She had already surrendered the coin and "her" notes to the boys so they could study it further and she could see their appreciation for the notes the other Riza had written. At least it wasn't a wasted trip in that regard. "I haven't made much progress."

"No, this is actually a lot considering your specialty is not bio-alchemy." Roy said and smiled at her.

"We worked on this last night, from the sketches we made." Ed said and pulled out his notebook. He showed her a portion of the array. "What we think is that it's more of a neuroinhibitor, much like how your brain turns off your body when you sleep."

"REM sleep, where your dreams occur, is when your motor neurons are inhibited so your muscles get rest." Al said. "It's all chemicals."

Riza sat there and recalled where she had heard all this before, her doctor. She had issues sleeping and finally had to go to a specialist to determine if she could take something for it. He prescribed a sleep aid which was going to work on the receptors in her brain to promote relaxation and work as an overall sedative. She took them once and never again, she didn't appreciate how it felt to be drugged and lose the recollection of time when she had been on them. That was not helping because now she was questioning whether or not she ever woke up this morning and went to work. "So are you telling me it's a sleep drug and not a weapon?"

"No." Roy said and shifted in his chair. He was intrigued by the topic and also her take on things. For an alchemist she really did get to the point quickly. "I still think this has malicious intent. It uses alchemy to override the brain's chemical producing abilities. I was wrong, I thought it was bio-electricity but the boys pointed out I was missing this part here...it's all chemicals."

"So..." Riza was determined to try and make sense of this information herself, however she had to take a moment to wait on Ed to boast about how he had bested Roy in something. It didn't come. These three had grown up studying and working on alchemy together and were used to it. It was a nurturing and positive think tank, not competitive and guarded in any way. Roy could admit he was wrong to Ed and Ed could just shrug it off. This...was unbelievable. "The array is activated and then it takes control of the way the brain produces these chemicals needed for sleep. Then these neuroinhibitors are activated and paralyze the body while the brain enters a deep sleep and creates this world you don't want to leave or wake up from. However there is a way to exit this dream by activating the reverse of the coin and allowing the chemicals to revert back to normal."

"Yeah." The three of them said in unison and stared at her. How had this woman just walked into the office and into Roy's life was beyond them. The Elrics didn't want to admit to themselves they were a little jealous.

"What about the coin's composition?" She asked. This sounded a lot more like the drug she had been on, it was capable of producing a feeling of euphoria and was widely abused as a narcotic. However, in this world Roy was the expert on bio-electricity and probably had an understanding of chemicals to go with it but what they were dealing with was neuro-science and he was understandably timid about making statements about the way the brain worked. She had a knowledge of this from her struggles with PTSD induced nightmares and her insomnia brought about by not wanting to sleep. Confident she knew the source she moved on to the coin itself. Ed was still the Fullmetal alchemist. He understood earth and all it's core elements. He could determine if the coin was bronze, copper or something organic.

"It's clearly charged." Ed said and held it in his hand. "It's pretty incredible actually. Do you really think this is a philosopher's stone?"

She could tell he was trying to fish for information, Ed could be subtle by playing innocent sometimes. He was looking for her to divulge why she knew about the stone and how she had come across this information. He didn't want answers, he'd find them for himself when he found out where to get them. "I think it was made with little regard for human life and that, unfortunately, is exactly what you'll discover when you find out about the stone."

They looked at her and she gave them all a stern glance telling them that was all they'd get from her on that topic. Roy continued to be impressed by her. He pointed to another note on her paper. "Now that we understand how this operates on the human mind in regards to science, we have some theories on what happens when the brain enters this state and has to cope with it."

"I'm not clear on how this alteration of chemicals does more than enable a sleep paralysis." Riza said and Ed was inspecting the coin and trying to not look like he was trying to figure out how to separate the metal components from the possible philosopher stone contributions in the alloy. It was at this point that she realized she did spend too much time around alchemists and had honed an odd skill for predicting their train of thought; not to engage them in conversation, but to prepare for them to engage in combat before realizing the conditions did not suit them. It was how she protected them, by understanding their passions and motivations. Even in their impetuous moments, everything was calculated because of how intrinsically skilled they were in alchemy. Now she could see how she understood so much of this without realizing it.

"Well that's where this comes in." Roy said and grabbed the coin from Ed's hand before he could do something stupid like destroy it so he could look at all it's components on his place mat. "Back to the topic of the neuro-biology. Since the chemicals are taking control of REM sleep it's highly possible that the extended time of this deep sleep is causing this. This deep sleep is not supposed to happen for so long so now the brain is trying to scare you out of sleep for self-preservation reasons and chase you out of your own mind."

"I've read a lot of medical and science journals about sleep disorders and how sleep is achieved." Al said. "I'm pretty confident in this conclusion."

Riza looked to him and Ed and Roy got a little quiet. Of course, Al couldn't sleep because he didn't have a body. He was trying to find answers in science to see if he could just shut down for a little while. She reached over and squeezed his hand and smiled. "I can't thank you all enough for how much work you put into this."

"We're not done!" Al said and produced his own notes.

"Actually..." Roy said as he looked at his watch. "We are. It's time for me to get back to work."

Ed huffed and took out his own watch to double-check the time. "Well, it doesn't mean we have to go with you."

"True." Roy said and pulled out his wallet to pay. "However I am sure the Lieutenant also is on lunch break and we do need to actually return her to work too. She doesn't work for me like you do."

Riza could see the disappointment on Ed's face and knew it didn't even come close to hers. Hearing Roy say that made her miss him all the more. She loved her job and hearing him say that just reminded her how she had to get this figured out to return to her own life. The fact was, despite everything she had done in the name of her job, she really did enjoy it. "The Colonel is right."

The boys grumbled and Ed wrapped his half-eaten sandwich in a napkin before finally getting up from the table. Roy sighed and watched the kid try to finish his drink, Ed had been too preoccupied with the coin to finish his meal. "Why don't I go get the car and you can finish?"

"Just let me write down a few of these notes and I'll be ready." Ed said and handed his sandwich to Al, and quickly tried to copy what Riza had on her notes. "I don't want to overlook anything."

Al set the sandwich down and started to sketch out the coin in his own notebook. "We can keep working on this today, you might have to go back to work but we don't."

"Ed works for me, remember?" Roy rolled his eyes and pulled his keys out of his pocket. "I'll go get the car."

"I am working for you." Ed said with a smile. "You'll have a full report by the end of the day on our research findings."

"Maybe you can look in your files and see if there is a State Alchemist in the area with this as their specialty?" Al asked as Roy dramatically took out his watch again and held it up, looked at it and then snapped it shut. "Since you're going back to work."

"Who works for who?" Roy asked and turned to leave, tossing his keys in his hand to go get the car.

Riza gave him a smile as he passed, he blushed and returned it, and she felt it warm her to her core. He was still Roy and to see him smile at her like that always put her at ease. He was enjoying himself, relaxed and not at all worried about who saw it. She stayed at the table and waited on Ed to finish up with her notes and coin. Ed was scribbling so fast she didn't think he'd be able to read it later so she said, "I can let you copy that back at the office. I'm afraid if we let the Colonel come pull the car around he's going to park on top of us."

Al laughed and a smile broke out across Ed's face. "Brother, she's right. You're in more danger copying it than you are in never seeing it again."

Ed handed her notes and the coin back. "I appreciate it! It's been great doing research again for fun. We've really enjoyed it. Thanks for letting us help."

"Thanks for helping Roy get out of the office and house more." Al said quickly. "He's put his life aside for us and we want to see him happy like this, we really do."

"I appreciate your help more than you can imagine, as for the Colonel...well I enjoyed our date a lot. " She said and Ed put his notes in his pocket and grabbed his sandwich. The boys smiled at each other and she heard a metal-on-metal fist bump behind her when she left the establishment. It was really sweet how they had each other and looked out for him. Together they left the bistro and she got a visual on Roy again as he played with his keys and walked to his car. Then she saw someone moving quickly to cross the street that caught her eye and the hairs raised on her neck. Ed continued to talk but she was no longer listening.

Roy looked down and saw a ticket on the windshield and pulled it out from under the wiper. He couldn't believe some traffic cop thought that his parking job was a violation of...what did that say? 'Violation of human rights?' What?! 'Humans using the sidewalk should be free of the torture of seeing this thing you call parallel parking.' Someone thought they were hilarious and as he looked up to see if that said person was coming to insult his driving skills he was confronted with a huge man in a canvas jacket. "So I take it you have an issue with my parking job?"

"No. I take issue with your job as a State Alchemist."

Riza was already in full flight, running towards the confrontation and panic gripping her heart. Scar was here and he was right in front of Roy who was completely oblivious to the threat. She couldn't scream without distracting Roy and she wasn't sure the scream could even leave her throat as tight as it had gotten. Roy was not aware that he was in danger, he had no idea this man was a threat and was targeting State Alchemists. He held nothing but a piece of paper and a set of keys in his hands and looked like he wasn't intending to go for his weapon at all! He wasn't the flame alchemist, he didn't have gloves on and she didn't even know if he was capable of defending himself with his alchemy! She didn't care what his alchemy was about, he had a gun and he had two legs to move him away from that man and needed to do it immediately! As soon as she got closer she saw Scar's shadow looming over Roy. No No No. This was her greatest fear coming to life and she forced the words from her mouth as Scar made his move. "COLONEL, get down!"

The seconds ticked by slowly, and it felt like nightmare were motion was impeded. She never broke eye contact with Roy's back nor the man in front of him wearing a yellow canvas jacket. Her gun was just clearing the holster when Scar raised his hand and slammed it into Roy's face, shoving him backwards into the car. Her gun was barely up before she saw alchemy crackling around Scar's hand, then the gun was finally raised and pointed at her target. She locked on and fired, but not before Roy's face glowed with a transmutation that could possibly liquefy his brains. She didn't blink, she kept firing until the gun was empty and Scar was mid-air, bouncing back to avoid the bullets coming at him in rapid succession. Roy slumped against the car as she made it to his side and she dropped her weapon to grab his off his hip.

As the new gun cleared Roy's body she grabbed him as he started to slide down the car door. She went to the ground with him, trying to cushion the impact with the sidewalk and had her gun on Scar ready to pull the trigger when she saw red: the red of Ed's coat as he joined the fray.