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Chapter 10: My Let Me Sign

BPOV

"So B, what kind of trouble are we getting ourselves into tonight?" Jasper asked me as we exited the school.

Oh, Fuck! I totally forgot to tell him that I had plans with Edward later. I didn't have the chance to fill him in on my night spent with Edward because we unexpectedly got busy with schoolwork. It slipped my mind. I suddenly felt bad because I felt like I was going to ditch him or leave him hanging all alone on a Friday night.

We always got together on Friday nights.

"Shit Jazz! I'm sorry, but I forgot to tell you... I'm hanging out with Edward tonight." I looked up at him apologetically. I didn't want him to feel like he was no longer important to me just because he and I weren't fucking anymore. Jasper would always be an integral part of my life.

"It's cool B… I see how it is... As soon as some new guy comes in and sweeps you off your feet, you ditch your friends…" He acted as if he was really hurt. He used his puppy dog eyes on me, and placed his hand in his chest as if he was hurting inside. I could tell that he was just joking, so I laughed at him. A couple of seconds later he laughed and told me not to worry about it.

"So what are you plans for tonight with Edward?" he inquired.

"Funny actually, he is taking me to this bar in Indy to see his friend from England play."

"A bar?" Jasper questioned, raising his eyebrows. "Edward Cullen goes to bars? And he is bringing his underage girlfriend with him? Wow B, you sure know how to fuck with the man. Who would have thought that Mr. Innocent-Virgin Edward Cullen goes to bars? I gotta hand it to you, B. You're doing a fine job corrupting the man." Jasper stated as he clapped his hands for me as if he was praising me. He was getting it all wrong. Well, maybe not all of it.

"It's not like that, Jazz!. Oh, and please don't call me his girlfriend because I hate that term! So don't say that shit about me or too me! Got it?!" I told him in a huff.

"Whoa! Alright! Calm down B... Alice actually asked me if I wanted to hang out with her tonight. I still haven't said yes because I thought we had plans. But since you're spending tonight with Edward, I will give her a call…" Jasper trailed off.

"Alice asked you to hang out with her tonight?"

"Uh huh," he replied, nodding his head.

"Did you put the moves on her yet? Work your magic on her?" I asked him shoving him gently with my shoulder as we continued to walk.

"I did. But it didn't work." Jasper sighed, looking defeated.

"What do you mean, it didn't work? What happened?"

"She doesn't like that we hook up… or should I say, 'hooked' up."

"How the fuck did she find out about that?" Somehow, I knew that Alice knew about me and Jasper being friends with benefits. Alice never asked us outright about it, and we never told her.

"Cause I tried to put the moves on her B, and she called me out on it! I do want to be with

her, but I couldn't start a relationship with her based on lies. So when she asked about us, I told her the truth."

"You told her the truth about us?"

"Yes. But don't worry. It's not like she's going to go run her mouth about it. She cares a lot about you. That's why she doesn't want us to hook up. She doesn't want to upset you or some shit. She doesn't want you to get mad at her for taking the benefits out of our friendship. She's pretty fucking insistent." Jasper explained.

"Did you tell her that I didn't care? That we aren't fucking anymore?" I questioned him. I felt terrible because I was the reason that was keeping Jasper from getting his dream girl.

"I can't B. Even if I do tell her that we're not fuck buddies anymore, you and I both know that we only stopped because you met Edward. I can't tell her that shit. She might think that I'm just using her as a rebound. What if Edward never came along? Do you think we would have stopped?" Jasper put his arm around my shoulder as we continued our walk home from school. He acted as if he wasn't hurt and that it didn't bother him. But I knew better.

"I'm sorry Jazz," I whispered to him.

I completely understand why Alice didn't want to get caught up in some love triangle. But that's the thing, there's no love triangle. Jasper and I were never in love in the first place. We only saw each other as friends with benefits and nothing more.

For Jasper, it has always been Alice. He's been in love with her ever since I could remember, and she had no clue about any of it. I wish I could explain to her the entire situation, but I couldn't risk telling her. Even if it was for Jasper. I felt so guilty about it. Had I known that our arrangement would be a problem for Jasper to get Alice, I would've stopped it a long time ago.

"It's cool B. Don't worry about me. I'm just going to work on being her friend for now. That's enough for me. Maybe with time, she'll finally change her mind and accept me and our past."

"It will work out Jazz. I have faith." I stopped in my tracks and looked up at him to emphasize my point. When it came to Jasper, I do believe that things would turn out okay for him. He deserved that much.

"Thanks, B. I appreciate it. Now let's go get you home so you can prepare for your date tonight." He wrapped his arms around me once again and walked me home. At that moment, I promised myself that I would do everything in my power to make him happy...as happy as I was with Edward.

Thank God, Renee went with Phil to his game in Ohio. They won't be back till Saturday night so that means I wouldn't have to sneak in or out this weekend. Just like last time, we decided to meet at five in Amish Land. Five was early, but it took an hour to drive to Indy and Edward wanted to get dinner before the show at eight. Jasper was kind enough to drop me off before he went to Alice's so I wouldn't have to leave the truck there all night.

I put on my hottest black heels that cuffed around my ankles. I decided to wear a black and white checkered tube top dress that was belted under my breasts. The dress was pretty short and it fell to my mid thigh. I did the smoky eye makeup thing and grabbed my black and grey coach bag. I walked out of my bedroom, my heels clicking against the hardwood floors, and Jasper whistled at me.

"Damn, B. Edward's gonna have a hard-on all night. What are you trying to do, kill the boy? Death by blue balls?" Jasper joked.

"Jazz, shut up! Take me to Amish Land now," I insisted.

As we were heading out of the house, Jasper grabbed my little leather jacket on the couch and handed it to me.

"You better wear this or you might get cold." Jasper said in a protective tone.

"Jazz, I don't want to cover up." I told him, refusing the jacket. He huffed but brought the jacket anyway.

We got to Keim's Market a few minutes earlier than the agreed time, and Edward wasn't there yet. I told Jasper that he could go already, and I was fine waiting there by myself. I didn't want him to be late meeting Alice. However, he insisted on staying with me, until Edward came.

As Jasper and I waited inside the car, we talked mainly about his plans with Alice. I really did hope that she would give Jasper a chance because she doesn't know what she's missing. I'm not talking just about sex either.

Jasper is a great guy. He is nice, smart, funny, handsome, protective and genuine. Any woman would be lucky to have him. It's not fair that I get to be all-happy with Edward, while Jasper was in pain. He deserves happiness.

We were lost in our conversation until we heard a car pulling up behind us. I looked at the back and saw that it was Edward. I was about to say goodbye to Jasper and hop out of the car on my own, when he surprised me by getting out of the car too. When we were both out, he stood beside me and walked with me towards Edward. It actually looked like he was my father, handing me off or some shit. It was a bit weird to say the least.

Fuck me! Edward looked amazing. He had black plants on with sexspenders hanging down, and a ratty looking t-shirt. He had to pull his pants up a little as he approached us because they were falling off his hips. I swear my breath hitched and my panties got wet when I saw a little of his treasure trail.

"Jasper," Edward said as he nodded to my best friend and extended his hand for him to shake.

"Hey Edward," Jasper responded coolly. I rocked a little on my feet not knowing how to act between two of the most important men in my life. I wanted to run to Edward and give him a hug. But I also wanted to hug Jasper goodbye. It was all surreal.

"Be good B," Jasper directed towards me. It was becoming his new favorite thing to say when I went out without him.

"Of course, Jazz." I told him as I reached over to hug him. I glanced at Edward and saw that he was looking down at the ground. When I pulled away from the hug, Jasper kissed the top of my head, and I turned to walk to Edward.

"Hello," Edward whispered sweetly. He gave me a big smile and pulled me into a bone-crushing hug that lifted my feet off the ground. I also heard him whisper in my ear how sexy I looked.

Jasper cleared his throat as Edward returned my feet to the ground.

"Take good care of her man. I'd hate to have to kick some worship leader's ass." It seemed that he was kidding around, but I could tell that he was dead serious. He was always protective of me, and he would kill anyone who hurt me.

"I won't let her out of my sight." Edward responded, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Here" Jasper said holding out my jacket. She refuses to wear it but just in-case." Edward reached out and took the jacket and we thanked him.

Jasper waved good-bye, while Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and helped me into his stupid shiny Volvo.

"Jasper was um… staring at your um….bum?" Edward questioned uneasily. I guess he felt stupid saying butt or bottom, and he didn't curse so he wouldn't say ass like me.

"Jasper was staring at my ass?"

"Yeah, does he have to do that? I don't really feel comfortable with him doing that." Edward admitted. I thought it was sweet that he was jealous.

"Well babe, Jasper IS a guy, and IS an ass man like you," I stated. I wouldn't tell him how Jaspers favorite way to fuck me was doggy style.

"Really, though, don't be jealous. I told you, I only have eyes for you." I reassured him as he brought his hand to my knee. I placed my hand over it and gave it a little squeeze.

Edward could do the simplest things to get my panties wet. Just having his hand on my knee made me think about sliding it up my thigh to encourage him to explore my pussy. I figured we had an hour drive, so I had some time to start moving it slowly.

As he drove, he told me about his friends and family at the church. He told me he was getting ready to start rehearsing for the Christmas Eve Concert and had to meet with the female vocalist the following day before the meal. He also mentioned how excited he was to see me tomorrow and to not have to lie about where he was going or who he was with to his friends and family.

He said it was hard keeping it from his best friend Emmett.

While he was talking, I moved his hand up my thigh, when it reached the hemline of my dress his hand froze. He glanced down at it, and he looked at me with his "what the heck" look. I smiled suggestively at him.

"What are you doing?" Edward asked looking puzzled.

"I was hoping I could get some release from you. Remember what I asked you to do to me the other day?" I asked innocently.

"How could I forget?" Edward sighed. "Bella, I really would love nothing more than to do the things you want me to do with you. I am a man, and I do get horny. Actually, I AM horny. You're beautiful, sexy, and I really have a hard time controlling myself around you. But we need to have control." He stated rubbing his hand up and down my thigh reassuringly.

"Its fine, I understand." I told him as I looked out the window, crossing my arms over my chest. I decided to ignore him a little. I know I'm a bitch and a whiny one at, I can't help it.

"Angel… Don't be mad…" Edward pleaded with me.

"Don't worry Edward, it's fine. I'll figure out a way to release all this sexual frustration." I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth. I felt Edward's hands stiffen, and realized how it must've sounded to him. Fuck!

"Bella, I thought we agreed we weren't going to see other people. You can't just go and mess around with Jasper just because he is willing to give you

the release that I am not ready to give." The tone in Edward's voice told me he was upset. I could tell that he was frustrated. I had to make this right. I didn't want to lose his trust.

"Edward, I'm not talking about Jasper. I told you that since we kissed, nothing has happened between us. I was implying that I would use MY fingers if you won't do it, which by the way I would prefer. I promise you Edward, Jasper and I are nothing more then friends. I need you to trust me on that." I assured him as I looked at him straight in the eyes so that he would know that I wasn't lying.

He seemed to have believed me because he calmed down and his hands relaxed.

"I'll do it to Bella, I promise. I do want to make you feel good. But I want to do it when the time is right and not on our second date." Edward told me soothingly.

"Promise?" I asked him, batting my eyelashes at him.

"I said I promised didn't I?" He questioned me back. I didn't want to spoil our night so I didn't bring the issue up again or push his limits during the rest of the night.

We found a nice Italian place a couple of minutes after, and decided to eat there. The food was great, except for the fact that all the waitresses inside were ogling at my man during our entire dinner. Edward, on the other hand, seemed to be completely oblivious of the effect he had on those women. During the entire dinner, he didn't look at anyone except me, which made me happy.

After we were done with dinner, we headed out to the bar. As soon as we stepped out of the car, he strode over to me, and pulled me out of the car. I paused and looked at his face. His eyes were burning with a lust and desire that I had never seen before.

I was about to ask him if there was anything wrong, when he took another step closer to me, closing the distance between us instantly. He wrapped his arms around my waist, pressed me up against his Volvo and started to kiss me hard. I had no clue what brought this on, but I was not going to complain.

I moved my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me. I felt how hard he was. I started to giggle a little, remembering Jasper's words about him having a hard-on all night. He pulled away slightly and kissed my neck. He began sucking my earlobe, and I couldn't suppress the moan that escaped my lips.

"You really shouldn't have worn that here, Angel." Edward breathed heavily in my ear.

"And why is that?" I whispered to him, barely having the strength to form coherent sentences at that point.

"Instead of enjoying my time with my friend, I'm gonna be glaring at drunk idiots all night while they check out my girlfriend."

"Thou shall not covet..." I said back to Edward. "It's a sin to covet another person's… person." I joked with Edward. He pulled away and laughed at my joke.

He took my hand and led me into the bar. I wasn't surprised when they didn't card me, but they did card Edward.

When we got inside, I was shocked when I saw that the place was packed. I actually thought that there'd only be a few people in here, but I was wrong. I wondered why so many people were in here, and why most of them were women.

"I can't wait for you to meet Robby." Edward told me excitedly.

"I can't wait to meet him either." I really couldn't wait to meet him. I wanted to know why Edward spoke so highly of him.

"Oh, there he is!" Edward pointed out his friend.

"Edward!" The hot British boy named Robby yelled when he saw us.

He rushed over and gave Edward a manly hug. His hair was brown and hung in his face. He moved it a lot like Edward did too. He was about the same height as Edward, but slightly more built. I'd say that he was almost as fuckhot as Edward, but if you ask me on a scale of one to Edward? He was a nine.

"Who's this lovely lady?" He asked as he took my hand and kissed it.

"Robby, this is my girlfriend, Bella. Bella, this is my other best friend, Robby." Edward introduced us.

"Nice to meet you," I said.

"You know Bella, if this boy is too tame for you, I can always show you a good time" Robby joked, teasing Edward more than hitting on me.

"Hey now!" Edward defended pulling me into his side. "I don't have to be wild to show Bella a good time. Isn't that right, Angel?" Edward asked looking down at me.

"Edward is actually full of surprises. Good or bad, it doesn't matter to me. He has magic fingers." I said suggestively. I had no clue if I was right or not, but I planned on finding out soon enough.

"Did she just say that?" Robby questioned, stunned by my bluntness.

"That's what she said," I answered him back. Edward laughed and gave a shrug, giving me the "what the heck" look. It was really such a cute face. I loved it when the things I said or did caused that look.

"She's a feisty one, Edward. Are you sure you can handle her?" Robby joked with him.

"Please, don't worry about me." Edward responded.

Just then, a few girls approached us, asking if Robby would take pictures with them. I had never heard of him before, but obviously all the other women in the bar had. When I asked Edward, he explained that one of his songs was featured in some movie about vampires that had a big following, and it really helped with his career. Put him on the map.

After they left, Robby said he had to get ready to go on and asked his manager Garrett to grab us a few beers. I only drank Corona with a lime, but felt odd making that request so I sucked it up when Garrett handed me Heineken.

As soon as Robby started singing, I finally understood why Edward spoke so highly of him. He was really good. He sounded like Bob Dylan or Jeff Buckley. He sang with his guitar and sometimes used a harmonica. His voice was soulful. The ladies in the bar were really taken with him. They would occasionally clap their hands during and in between his songs. They giggled a lot like school girls too.

Edward didn't have any more beers after his first one. I, on the other hand, didn't refuse any of the ones Garrett brought to me. After my third round, I felt like I was drunk already. I was quite surprised though with how Edward was taking it. He didn't ask me to quit or stop drinking. Instead, he wrapped his arms around me from behind. At that point, I didn't know if I got more intoxicated because of the alcohol or because of his breathtaking scent. I closed my eyes to feel more of him. I heard him sing some of the words to Robby's song as we swayed to the music. It was pure bliss.

The next thing I knew, Robby was saying that his good friend was going to come up and sing a song. I looked at him surprised, and he smirked as he took the stage.

People clapped for him as he took Robby's guitar. He approached the mike and said, "Good evening everyone. I wrote this song a few days ago, and Robby was kind enough to let me come up and sing it for my Bella." I had no idea he had been planning this.

I couldn't keep the stupid grin off my face as Edward began to play.

Standing there by the broken tree

Her hands were all twisted and she was pointing at me

I was damned by the light coming out of her eyes

She spoke with a voice that disrupted the sky

She said "Walk on over yeah to the bitter shade,

I will wrap you in my arms and you will know you've been saved

Let me Sign, Let me Sign,

Can't fight the devil so just let me sign.

As I listened to the lyrics of the song, I was stunned that Edward was singing such a dark piece. It was different from all the other songs I've heard him sing before. All the while in church, he was singing songs that tell everyone to have faith and hope in God. Now, he's singing a song about surrendering to the devil. It didn't seem like him.

I'm not saying that it didn't fit him. Edward could sing "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Stars" and I wouldn't give a damn. And I admit that it was the hottest song I've ever heard him sing. It's just that this was a side of him that I didn't know. He sounded so much different from when I first heard him sing in church. I couldn't wait to ask him questions about the song.

As always, Edward looked stunning up on the stage. The way he strummed the strings in his guitar as he sang, the song was overwhelming. I was in awe of him. The way he looked at me also took my breath away. His eyes never left mine the entire time he was singing. He was looking at me as if I was the most precious thing in the world My heart filled with happiness, and blush overtook my cheeks. I wanted so much for this evening to be over so that I could finally take him home with me and have my way with him.

Edward finished the song and everyone applauded for him. As soon as he came down from the stage, I literally ran over to him wasting no time. I immediately pulled him into a dark corner, shoved him against the wall and kissed him aggressively. Although I hardly doubt that anyone could see us, I didn't care if they did.

He lifted me up from the floor never breaking the kiss, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. I could hardly contain my excitement when he lifted me up by my ass and left his hands there. He spun us around so I was now the one pressed up against the wall. I felt how excited he was, and it made me even wetter. He kissed me hungrily, and I felt him push his tongue into my mouth. I opened it further to give him better access. The taste of him made my knees weak. If he wasn't holding me right now, I would have fallen to the floor.

As he gripped my ass, I moaned. He broke away from our kiss and started to nibble at my neck and shoulders. I might have moaned louder than I should, but I didn't care if anyone heard me.

He eventually pulled away slightly, breathing heavily.

"That was the hottest, sexiest song I have ever heard. You wrote that?" I panted.

"Uh huh…" Edward said as he continued kissing my collarbone. Actually, I thought it was more of a moan, rather than an answer. But who cares? I loved the feeling of his lips in my skin.

Once again, just as any other perfect moment of ours, it had to get ruined. Garrett interrupted us by handing me another beer. I swear I would have killed him if I could have. Didn't he see that we were busy?

I untangled from Edward and grabbed the beer.

"Thanks Garrett…" I said sarcastically.

"No problem sugar," he said laughing. We walked back out toward the stage and Edward said he had to use the bathroom.

"Keep an eye on Bella for me?" Edward asked Garrett.

"Sure Mate," Garrett responded.

"I don't need a babysitter Edward," I said, quite annoyed. I can take care of myself. I'd been doing it for the past sixteen years.

"No one said you did Angel, but these men in here do." Edward said as he kissed my cheek and turned to walk to the bathroom.

I turned to see Garrett several feet away from me, flirting with some Cougar. I laughed. That's what Edward gets for asking a drunken Brit to watch his drunken "person".

I took a swig of my beer and immediately stiffened when I felt someone walk up behind me. He smelled like whiskey and grease. I moved forward, but I could still feel his gross breath on the back of my neck following me.

"Let me take you home and fuck you with nothing but those shoes on," he whispered to me. I spun around disgusted.

This man was creepy. I wanted to say something rude or make fun of him, but my instincts told me not to make this drunken smelly asshole mad. You can never tell what drunken men were capable of doing.

"I'm sorry, I'm here with someone." I stated as I tried to make my way to Mike. I wasn't able to get far enough because the smelly asshole grabbed my arm to stop me. He spun me around to face him and pulled me close to his body.

"Aren't you supposed to buy a lady a drink before you force yourself on her?" I snared, no longer worried about pissing him off. The guy didn't flinch one bit.

"Let…..Me…..Go" I said with venom in my voice. I was starting to get scared, but I still put up a brave face. When he still didn't move an inch, I began to think of ways to get away from him.

Just then, my savior arrived.

He didn't speak. He just shoved the guy out back and punched him square in the face. The guy was so drunk so he immediately went down. Edward crouched down to him and spoke calmly yet harshly.

"You better pray to God that he kills you before I do, because with God as my witness, I swear if I EVER see your hands on my girl again, I won't hesitate to end your life." Edward stood up and took my arm dragging me over to Garrett.

"Garrett, I asked you to watch Bella! What the heck happened?!" I was still shook up a little but I couldn't help but smile when I heard Edward.

"Edward, I'm fine, really. Let's just say goodbye to Robby so you can take me home." I stumbled a little into Garrett, and Edward caught me.

Robby finished up his second set and came down to say goodnight to us. He gave both of us a hug, and Edward helped me walk to the car as I began tripping over my feet and his.

"Gosh Bella…" It was the first thing he said all night in reference to my drinking, and he sounded slightly annoyed. He helped me in the car, and I asked him to stop at the In and Out to get some burgers. Food was necessary after drinking.

"Bella, I'm really sorry about tonight… about punching that guy. That's not who I am. I really am not sure who I am when I'm around you. You really bring out all these emotions that I'm not used to, and I don't think I react in a Christian way." Edward confessed as he picked up my hand. He continued to speak, "Bella, in case you haven't noticed, I'm breaking all the rules now. I just took a minor into a bar and let her get drunk, I mauled you in a public place, and despite how wrong it was, I don't regret it one bit. I punched a guy and threatened to kill him if he ever touched you again, which was completely wrong of me to do despite what he did to you. I have lied to my friends for the first time in my life. I'm doing everything wrong right now, Bella. I'm doing things I promised myself I would never do. I'm doing things that are contrary to what was taught to me in church and at home.... Yet, I can't seem to feel guilty about it. For some reason, things have never felt so right for me." He held my gaze and traced his fingers over my face.

"Edward..." I wanted to say something. I wanted to tell him that I felt the exact same way, but he cut me off.

"If I tell anyone about us, they'll most probably say that what we have is wrong and it's not theirs to judge."

"Edward…." I didn't really know what to say. "I don't want you to change for me. I like you just how you are. I'm really sorry…." I stopped. I wasn't ready to admit to him or myself aloud that I brought out this bad side of him… a side he was ashamed to let others see.

"Don't be sorry, Angel. Everything that happened tonight was my fault. It was wrong of me to bring you to a bar even if it wasn't your first time. There's nothing for you to be sorry about. They were my mistakes."

"Edward, what was your song all about? What inspired you to write that song?I don't really get the whole can't fight the devil thing, it doesn't sound like you." I asked as I chewed some of my burger.

"The only person strong enough to fight the devil is God. I am just a man. Even if I have to go to hell for being with you in this life, I'd gladly take it... I would gladly sign my life over to the devil if it meant being with you."

"Don't say things like that Edward…its not you." I felt guilty enough for corrupting him.

"Angel, I don't believe for one second God would make me sacrifice my salvation for yours. He is a good and forgiving God. No matter how many times we fall, I'm sure He'll be there to pick us up. Besides, it's just a song." He assured me.

I just needed to be close to him. He just told me he wrote a song about me, and how he would trade his salvation for mine. It was a song about being deeply in love. My heart was melting.

"Take me home Edward, and make me feel good…?" I asked needing to show him how I felt, cause I wasn't sure how to tell him.

Please Dear Jesus, let me be close to him for the night.

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