"Why wouldn't you want me to know? Why wouldn't you want Gibbs to know?"
"Do you think that it was planned?"
"I don't know," he shrugs.
"It wasn't," she assures him.
"So it was an accident? You don't have accidents, unless they involve cars," he points out.
"We all make..." she chooses her words carefully, "bad judgment calls, sometimes."
"You don't think it was a mistake?"
"No," she answers quickly.
"I can't believe that you're having a baby."
"Why is that so hard to believe?"
"I didn't think that you wanted kids."
"Sometimes we don't know what we want."
"How did this happen?"
"There was some alcohol involved," she admits.
"I see."
"And to answer your earlier statement, up until recently I didn't think that I wanted kids."
"This changed your mind?"
"No. I had been considering the idea for a while. It's kind of like asking Santa for a puppy, in June, you don't really expect to get what you asked for, especially not right away."
"Why don't you want Gibbs to know?"
"Why does it matter?"
"I just want to know."
"Then figure it out," she responds.
"You don't want him to know, because you don't want to be in trouble."
"Why would I be in trouble?"
"Wait a minute... a few months ago, didn't you go to a bar with Tony? And you two came in extremely hangover the next day. Did you... are you..."
"I do not recall," she lies.
"You're lying. It all makes sense now. Tony is seeing someone, you aren't upset, because it is you. You don't want Gibbs to know because you're going to have to tell him that the father is Tony."
"You are jumping to conclusions," she warns.
"Are you saying that I am wrong?"
"No. I am not."
"So why don't you want Gibbs to know?"
"I don't want to get grounded."
"Desk duty does not bring out good qualities in you."
"I agree."
"So you're having a baby? With Tony?"
"Does it matter who it's with?"
"You shouldn't have to do it alone."
"I will not be."
"So do you know what you're having?"
"No."
"Are you going to find out?"
"I don't think so."
"Why not?"
"I do not want to know."
"Why not?"
"Because it doesn't matter. I do not have a preference."
"Does Tony want to know?"
"How should I know?"
"Ziva, you should tell Gibbs."
"I am not ready, yet."
"Then I suggest that you doing a better job of trying to hide it. Although, the longer you hide it from him, the madder he is going to be. You should just tell him."
"Maybe," she agrees.
"Maybe? You know that it's true. He's going to find out, and I don't want to be there when he does."
"Why not?"
"You broke rule number twelve."
"No," she argues, "I did not. I am not dating a co-worker."
"Rule number one?"
"Never let suspects stay together?"
"The other rule number one, never screw your partner."
"McGee it is not never screw your partner, it is never screw over your partner."
"I think that is still applies, Gibbs is going to take his anger out on Tony. He can't do anything to you."
"Why not?"
"Because you're pregnant, with Tony's baby."
"McGee!"
"You having a baby with Tony is like me having a baby with Abby, it's just wrong."
"You and Abby would make cute babies," Ziva smirks.
"Stay on topic," he warns.
"Maybe the two of you should have a baby," Ziva teases.
"You are not funny."
"Don't you think Abby would like to have a baby?"
"I am sure that she would, but I am not going to offer."
"You don't want one?"
"Not right now."
"Ha!"
"Ha? What did I say?"
"You said not right now. You didn't say that you didn't want one with her."
"You are twisting this, into something that it's not."
"You've never considered it?"
"No Ziva, I can't believe that you ever considered having a baby, with Tony. I can't believe that you are actually going to have his baby. It's like an alternate universe, but the two of you are the only ones who are in it."
"Why are you so upset by this? You aren't having a baby with him."
"Why aren't you more upset? You have having a baby, with Tony. You are never going to be able to get away from him. You are going to be stuck with him, forever. That is going to get old, believe me."
"What I don't mind?"
"He is insanely jealous. The second that you bring a guy around, his kid, he is going to lose it."
"I am not bringing anyone around right now."
"You're having his child, do you really think that means the two of you are going to be together?"
"Why are you asking?"
"Has he proposed marriage?"
"McGee, what is your problem?"
"This is going to end badly. Gibbs is going to be angry with the both of you, he'll be cranky, and I'll bear the brunt of it."
"You are too dramatic."
"He's is going to be pissed when he finds out."
"Why?"
"Because he is better at reading people than I am, and he'll know."
"Know what?"
"Tony loves you."