I don't own Naruto or any of the characters. Kishimoto-san does. If he gave me the Naruto franchise, THEN I'D OWN NARUTO!

Don't sue meh. (￣▽￣)ノ

Chapter Nine

It's always the same. In the end, my life is a complete mess. I never get what I want. And for some odd reason, I accept that. I've been without for so long that I'm used to being without. So that feeling.. That feeling of actually having scares me. Because I know that once it's taken away, I'll never survive this world again. That is why I mustn't give up on Konoha. I wish to survive in this world, just like any other animal in the forest. Just like any other human in the ninja world. We take other downs just so we can be a step higher. We turn against each other to seem powerful. We kill to survive. I've never succumbed to these sins..but it felt so good when I touched upon it. When I tried to be dark to soothe my own heart. I wish to go back. I do. But the light has a strong pull on me which I can never resist. A pull that I'm willing to succumb to. But like any other on this world,

I have my limits.

Mitsuko

The darkness surrounded me like a thick fog. Screams of anger echoed causing me to cover my ears in a panic. Why was this happening? Why were these people yelling at me? Over and over again. "You murderer!" "We'll never accept you." "DIE ALREADY!" Over and over again.

My ears were still covered as I screamed in agonizing sorrow. When would this pain ever stop? Everything went silent, including myself. I look up feeling a faint glow on me. A golden winged butterfly flapped it's elegant wings through the darkness. It's glow pulling me. As I drew closer, the cold room turned into a warm happy place. Happy thoughts and memories of my own danced around in my head. I stared at the butterfly with confusion. What was this thing? I swear to have seen it before, but where? I slowly reach my hand out for the insect to land on me but before it could, I was awoken out of my dreamland.

I gasped sitting up. My old alarm clock rung loudly on my wooden nightstand. But I was too in my own thoughts to pay attention. Damn. I was so close to touching it! Do you even know what it is? If I knew, I wouldn't stress over it. Still upset I see. Still a liar I see. Shomei sighed before going completely silent.

Of course I was still angry at her! No matter what, she lied and used me to take away the person I cared about. Shomei was no different than Orochimaru at this point.

You keep comparing me to him yet I was only doing what I thought was right. I was pro-

I don't want to hear it Shomei-sama! I snap. You lied. You used me. Everything I am against, YOU did! How could you even try to justify it with "protection" or "what was right"? You knew what you were doing, and you knew the consequences. So now you will pay for them. No more talk of this for the rest of the day, understand?

I took her silence as my final answer.

I slam my hand over my alarm, stretching my aching muscles. "That dream was weird." I mumble. I gingerly touch the cut on my forehead, wincing at the pain. I had managed to split a stitching. I unwrapped the bandages to feel the crisp morning air hit my wound. I stand heading over to shower and dress myself. I rewrap the bandages taking notice of the slight pinch. After receiving a peach from the spirits, I open my front door to a rather beautiful morning.

The birds were singing, flowers were blooming, and the sun was making his loud statement of being up early! The spirits whispers soothed any and all previous tension before. Have a good day. We will be watching. We will protect always.

I smile walking down the hall. Naruto's apartment was a few doors down from my own. How convenient. I knock once, twice, thrice, with no answer. "Naruto..!" I say loudly. I continue to knock until a groggy looking blond opened the door. "Jeez..!" I outwardly cringe. "You look horrible." "Oh. Hey Mitsuko..what're y-*yawn* you doin' here?" I blink. Naruto and his laziness..

"Uh..well last I checked, the schedule for watching me begins today." "Yeah, so..?" Naruto yawns again before scratching his butt. I roll my eyes with a slight smirk. "Which means now. Starting with you? Remember? Your shift is from 8-10..? Ring any bells..?!" Naruto slumped down with a loud whine. "That's todayyyy...?" "Yes, Uzimaki." I sigh walking inside his apartment.

••••

I sat in awkward silence with Naruto as he searched everywhere for his jacket. His apartment was the exact opposite of what I imagined. Clothes thrown on the floor, bed a complete mess, instant ramen cups stacked in a corner, just a huge mess..! And this is who you associate with.

Hmph. At least he's not a liar.

"Uh..yeah. Sorry for the mess. I'll clean up when we get back." Naruto scratched his neck with a blush dusting his cheeks. I giggled, waving him off. "It's alright. Really." After another ten minutes of awkward silence and searching, Naruto was finally ready to head out. "Let's go get breakfast!" Naruto grabbed my wrist nearly dragging me down the street to Ichiraku's. Many citizens who we passed by glared or openly scolded us. I guess the village still hasn't changed its perspective on Naruto that much..

I managed to slip from Naruto's grasp to catch my breath. It was too early to run around, plus my depleted chakra from helping Inoichi the night before really did a number on me! I stand with a sigh, following Naruto's scent. He smelled of high sodium and manly musk. I will never understand his love for ramen.

"Whoops..!" I lightly bump into a middle aged man. "Sorry sir." I bow, showing my sincerity. "Y-you.." "Me?" The man sneered at me before grabbing my wrist painfully. "I'd remember that face from anywhere! YOU KILLED LORD THIRD!"

"W-what..? What did you say..?" I blink watching the man turned from deranged to normal again. "I said it's not a problem. But I best be on my way!" The man gave my wrist a gentle squeeze before walking off. What the actual HELL was that? I do not know. Your guess is at good as mine. I stare at my hand for a moment. Something felt off again. As if.. something bad were going to happen soon. Damn. I hate this feeling..! I shake my head.

"Don't jump to conclusions." I mumble aloud. I finally caught up to Naruto who sat stuffing his face in the Ichiraku booth. "Thwere you ware. I ordered you schum fwood." I scrunch my eyebrows in confusion. "I can't understand you Naruto." I chuckle. A big bowl of hot ramen was placed before me. "Thank-" My thanks were cut short as the old man who owned Ichiraku's stood glaring at me with so much hate. "You thought we wouldn't remember? You think we're stupid?! We know a traitor when we see one! YOU KILLER." I gasp, staring mortified at the old man. Why was he saying these things? A warm hand on my own brought the deranged man's face back to a kind smile.

"Mitsuko..?" Naruto called. "W-what..what did you say..?" I mumbled. "I said Naruto here ordered your food for you. Hurry and eat now! It'll get cold." The old man set a pair of chopsticks in front of my bowl. I blinked rapidly, feeling my appetite go far away. I put a fake smile on. "Let's eat Naruto." He gave me a hard stare for a moment. "You okay?" Damn. Of course he saw through my façade. "Yeah. Why do you ask?" "Uh..no reason. Let's eat!"

••••

I slumped against a tree under it's shade. Naruto was training with himself as I watched nearby. He had told me that there was an extra hour that all six of my babysitters had to share. Meaning, everyday someone else had an extra hour with me. Naruto being himself decided to spend our extra hour training. I, of course declined. I always loathed training. Considering that's all Orochimaru had me do. Besides, it is a waste of time if there is no end goal for the training.

There's only one goal when you train. To get stronger. Yeah, yeah. Strength isn't everything.

I close my eyes for a moment feeling an oncoming nap. "MURDERER!" I jolt awake with fear. I cower away from Hinata's scrunched up face. Her face full of hatred and spite. "You think we'll accept you? After what you did? NEVER! You don't belong here..!" I feel the tears form as I hide from her hateful expression. Why can't I escape this feeling..? This.. nightmare..?

I feel a hand grasp my shoulder causing a whimper to slip out. "Mitsuko?" Hinata called. I look up to see her and Naruto stare with concern. "W-why are you crying Suko-chan?" Hinata wipes my tears away as reality seemed to finally come back to me. "Sorry..I sorta zoned out." I stand with another fake smile. "Zoned out? Mitsuko this wasn't the first time you've supposedly "zoned out"!" I glance away from Naruto's worried face. I couldn't stand lying to him but I didn't want to worry him even more with my apparent daymares.

"Just..just leave it alone Naruto." "He's right Mitsuko. What's wrong? We can help-" "I'm okay! Sheesh get off my back already!" I snap. I growl storming off into the forest. I need to clear my head. "Suko-chan..!" I hear Hinata running after me. "Give me some space Hinata!" "I wish I could, but it's my turn to watch you. Being too far from me could get us both in serious trouble." I sigh. Of course. I can't even storm off properly..! "Please don't be upset with me.." Hinata glances down at the ground twiddling with her fingers. Her innocent thoughts brought a real smile to my face. "I'm not. Don't worry." "Okay good!" We walk back to her huge estate in a full conversation. "I know you like Naruto, Hina-chan..!" I tease. She blushes a deep crimson at my joke stuttering her remark. "N-n-no I don't.." "Ha! Look at your face-" I bump into someone's chest mid sentence. "Sorry.." I cautiously look up to see clear doe eyes stare back at me. Much like Hinata's except more manly. I held my breath waiting for the daymare to start again. "Excuse me." I blush realizing my obnoxious stare and hold of the guy. "My apologies." I let him go. I watched as he greeted Hinata and openly asked her about me. "This is Mitsuko, Neji." If I had tea in my mouth, it would be all over Hinata and the wall. THAT'S Neji Hyuga?!

I felt my jaw slack a bit at his appearance. He had really grown up the last time I had seen him! Jeez..he's..attractive! I blush, desperately trying to hide my face.

I wait until Neji had turned the corner to face his smiling cousin. "I know you like cousin Neji..!" "No I don't!" I immediately deny her tease. Hinata giggled mockingly calling Neji back. "Oh Neji-san..!"

••••

"Aaaaaaaaand, done!" I dragged Hinata over to a mirror to show her my masterpiece. Her hair was in two braids that had sunflowers slowly growing on the side. "Oh it's so beautiful! Thanks Suko-chan." I hummed with much approval. I hadn't done anyone else's hair besides my own in years. "Welcome!" I yawn rather loudly. I blush out of embarrassment whilst Hinata giggled at me. "You can have a nap in my bed if you want." I politely declined her offer fearing what was beyond my closed eyes. "No no.. I'm okay thanks!" "B-but-" "Lady Hinata." Neji called. He stood behind her, eyeing me rather closely. I wonder what's he thinking..

I focus on Neji's thoughts. Murderer. We'll never accept you..! JUST DIE ALREADY!

I fidget knowing those weren't thoughts at all. Okay so no mind ready? "Sakura is here to collect Mitsuko-san." "Aw..has it been two hours already?" "Yes. You'll see her tomorrow." Hinata hugs me briefly before saying goodbye. "I'll see ya soon!" I smile brightly knowing I'd see my best friend again. Neji took it upon himself to walk me out. "Well. I'll see you soon too?" I ask awkwardly. He chuckles opening the door. "Sure. Suko-chan." My face turns beat red.

Only Hinata called me Suko-chan. And only I called her, Hina-chan. I don't dare to turn around and face Neji's smug face. "See you whenever." Instead of responding, I hold up two fingers and continued walking off of the Hyuga estate.

I rub my hot cheeks knowing the blush wouldn't go away for a while. "Mitsuko-chan!" I look up to see Sakura making her way over. "Hi." I bow, smiling afterwards. "What's today's schedule." Me and Sakura walk along side each other down a Konoha street. People were buzzing, shops getting ready for lunch rush, children running around playing, all in all, it was comfortable. "Weeeelll..! Besides me having some chores to do, Lady Hokage wanted me to guide you where you'll be showcasing your strength." "Showcasing my strength..?" Sakura lightly shrugged. "I'm guessing she wants to know how strong you are. Considering your take down of 15 Anbu, I'm assuming you're pretty damn strong." It was my turn to shrug this time. "I'm..something." "Well we can't be late "something". Let's get a move on." I nod in agreement.

••••

"I have to do what now?" I ask for the third time. Lady Tsunade looked as though she were ready to burst. "For the final time..! You will show us-" She made a broad gesture to herself, Kakashi-san, and Shizune. "-Your immediate strength. Now as a ninja, I know you have many skills but I just want to know basics. Ninjustsu. Taijustu. And finally, Genjustu. Think of this exercise as..training." Ew I hate training!

"Uh..definitely not training. I absolutely HATE training." I outwardly cringe to show my disgust. "Well whatever makes you feel comfortable, just start." "Fine." I walk a distance away from the three, getting prepared. "Oh, you won't be fighting us."

As if on cue, Sakura, Shikamaru, and someone who I recognized as Rock Lee appeared. "Yes! It is an honor to finally meet you again, Mitsuko-chan." Lee grabbed my hand with such grace. His cheeks turned a shade of pink as he gazed into my eyes. "You are as beautiful as the moon gets at night.." He mumbled more incoherent words. "Hehe.." I awkwardly giggle, patting his head. Lee nearly cried at the simple gesture. "Lee!" Sakura snapped.

He immediately fell back in line. "We'll start with Ninjustu. Sakura?" "Right!" Sakura stood across with me with a slight smirk. "I won't go easy on you." "Easy? Pfttt. Give me your best shot." Sakura summoned chakra to her closed fist. "Cha...!" I summoned a katana, hearing an ear piecing yell from the Hokage. "NO WEAPONS! I SPECIFICALLY SAID NO WEAPONS!"

"Alright, sheesh!" The katana dispersed, right before Sakura's fist grazed my cheek. I barely managed to dodge! Let's dance Haruno.

••••

"Am I done yet?!" I drop to the ground in exhaustion. I had just finished fighting Shikamaru and boy was I whooped. My muscles ached. My arms were covered in bruises and cuts, while my legs looked like they were ready to fall off. The sky was starting to slowly change colors. Sakura took a lot of chakra, Lee took too much strength, and Shikamaru took too much knowledge. I jump at the sudden contact of a hand on my shoulder. "You should play me in Shogi. Interesting match we'd have." I nod aimlessly. I'm trying to catch my breath and my mind!

Shouldn't have used so much chakra. Yeah yeah. Leave me be. "So..who's my next babysitter?" I ask. Lee graciously helped me stand to my feet. He was treating me like a queen, I almost liked it!

"It's been four hours. Ino and Sai were supposed to do their watching but we obviously had other things to do." I hum feeling the cool breeze graze my warm skin. My dark strands of hair stuck to my sweaty cheeks. I felt sticky and in need of a bath. I unconsciously tune Sakura out as the spirits whispered sweet nothings in my ear. It almost soothed me until I was jolted awake by those evil thoughts again.

The village despises you. Learn to live lonely. DIE! Leave me alone already! "...I believe it's Kiba's turn to watch you before you head in." "Huh?" I look at Sakura with confusion. "I said it's Kiba's turn to watch you..?" I nearly forgot he had to babysit me too. I really don't feel like dealing with his shenanigans.. "Well if that's the case, where is he?" Lady Tsunade shrugged her shoulders. "He'll be in a hell lot of trouble if he doesn't show. Sakura, report back to me if Kiba doesn't show." "Yes ma'am!" The Hokage left without another word. Shizune was hot on her trails, yelling something about not drinking. "Good job, Mitsuko." Kakashi-san gave me a broad thumbs up. His one eye showed me enough emotion to know he was sincere.

I blushed but accepted the praise. Lee and Shikamaru left, sparing me a nice goodbye. It was just me and Sakura left in a boring silence. I smelled the air for a second. The spirits told me my favorite spot wasn't too far from the training grounds. "Hey Sakura, think you could drop me off at a place I know?" "Well..Kiba should be here-" "Don't worry. He'll meet me there." "A-are you sure..? I can't leave you alone for too long." I heard the hesitation in her voice. I smiled, trying to reassure her. "It's fine..! It's our favorite spot so he'll definitely be there." Sakura paused for a moment. "Alright.."

The dark thoughts envelope me whole. I was sitting in the darkness, surrounded by red hatred filled eyes. The whispered of these demons grew louder over time. "You're nothing." "You think we'll accept you? WRONG!" "There's no room for scums like you." "GO DIE ALREADY! JUST DIE. DIE!" I slammed my hands over my ears. Their whispers were now shouts. Shouts, turned to screams. Soon I was screaming myself. "Why won't this stop?! WHY CAN'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE." I sobbed.

I didn't understand. It was my first day back in the village, and yet all these thoughts of not being accepted were trying to punish me. "Naruto said I belonged!-" "HE LIED! They all, LIE!" I cry for the voices to stop. I was at the point of begging them to stop the torment. Why couldn't I just be accepted? Did I really belong? The longer the voices screamed, the more I considered their words. "W-where's the butterfly?!" I shout. I open my eyes looking around the darkness. That little light of the insect saved me once, it can do it again. "Where's the butterfly?!" I waited and continued to call for the insect. I knew it wasn't coming. Collapsing in a heap of tears, I bring my knees close to my chest.

The voices continued to scream in my ear as I rocked back and forth. I hummed my favorite song by my mother praying this nightmare would stop. "Mitsuko.." I look around. Someone was calling me. "Mitsuko...!" "Who's there!" I shout over the voices screams. My eyes widen in shock. Arms reached out for me. "Mistuko.." That voice was so familiar. So distant that I nearly forgot...

"M-mother?.." "Mitsuko. Mitsuko!"

I gasp, taking in my surroundings. I was clinging to Kiba's leather jacket with all of my being. He looked uncomfortable and I took the hint of letting him go. "I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me, I just-" "It's whatever." Kiba's stood to dust himself off. "I found you asleep and tried to wake you. That's when you started crying and yelling for a.. butterfly." I look away feeling embarrassed that he had heard me. "Then something about your Mother." I shrug lightly at his last thought. "Let's just..not talk about it, okay?" I turn to Kiba. I watched as he stiffened and hesitated with his next words. "W-what's wrong?" I ask.

"You..you're eyes." I believe you have my eyes child. Crap. I blink, feeling Shomei's reptilian eyes fade away. My lilac ones returned to me within a few seconds. "Sorry. When I feel I'm in danger, they kinda just appear on instinct."

Kiba keeps his distance not wanting to come near. "It's fine! I promise." I hold my hand out for his. He looks at it, then back at me. "I'm not taking your hand to just be thrown off another cliff." My hand drops as a loud groan left me. "Ugh..! I told you, that wasn't me." "Then who was it!" Kiba snapped. His feral eyes met mine. His thoughts were of confusion and even..fear? Don't tell him about me. You were sworn to secretary the day you became the new Guardian!

I'm tired if keep secrets Shomei. You threw him off a cliff, for God's sake! He deserves the truth. Mitsuko! You will regret this- silence.

I take a pause before sighing. I glance at Kiba before patting the grass patch next to me. "Sit." I commanded. "No-" Assuming he would resist, I forced Kiba to sit via mind justu. "What the- did you just-" I shush him, taking his hands in my own. We sat across from each other under the pale Moon's light. "Mitsuko-" I shush Kiba again as I closed my eyes. "I'm going to show you something. Something I haven't even shared with Naruto." "Which is?" "Me."

Kiba froze as graphic images from my childhood, from Shomei-sama, from everything about me projected into his mind. "W-what the actual hell..?" "Shush..just relax and see for yourself." The projections turned more graphic, more brutal as my horrendous days with the snake appeared. "That's enough!" Kiba closed his eyes as the guilt set in. "Hey. Hey, look at me." I softly called his eyes upon mine. "Whatever you feel, feel it. But don't feel guilty. Don't..pity me. I was a weak child then, but I am a strong survivor now."

Kiba pulled away muttering incoherent words. Something along the lines of "I know." "Why would you show me that?" He asked. "To show you that I have a..friend within me. She protects me. Gives me strength. And sometimes does..bad things. Her name is Shomei. And you've met apart of her that wasn't meant to be shown."

That is enough! Don't you tell him another thing of me. I don't need to explain myself to this..lowlife of a human being.

"She was..upset. She took control and nearly hurt you.." Kiba's eyes widen as I continued on. He believed me but then, he didn't. He thought I was crazy! "I know I know! It sounds crazy, maybe even psychotic. But I'm telling the truth." I took step towards Kiba which he responded with a step back.

"Hey..come on Kiba." I placed my hand on his warm cheek. Oh, how I missed being this close to him! "Don't. touch. me!" He slapped my hand off of his face. "Know the difference between us Mitsuko. One of us is being watched under wraps, and the other is the one watching said person." I frown. Was he serious? After what I showed him, he decides to put LABLES on us? I growl, marching right up to his stupid face! "You are the most insensible, judgemental ASSHOLE, I've ever met! What makes us so different Kiba?! Because of our so called "titles"! I shared something personal. And all you can see is the negative in me. It's like..it's like I don't even belong.." I turned away to hide my tears. My anxiety and fears were coming true. I really didn't belong. I was just here. With no true purpose. "Take me home." I whispered. When Kiba didn't move, I got so angry. "I SAID TO TAKE ME HOME NOW!" He jumped as the sky cracked with lightning. Dark storm clouds slowly gathered. It was going to rain soon.

"Fine! Just..don't yell."

••••

It was pouring when we finally made it to my door. I sensed Naruto already asleep in his house while the other tenants were about doing nightly stuff. "We're a few minutes early but that's okay." I stayed silent picking up my key. My green plant friend sensed my distressed and tried to wrap itself around me. Not today friend. I slip away to unlock my door. Kiba awkwardly stood outside my door obviously looking around my little apartment. "I'll uh..I'll see you tomorrow?" He asked. "Yeah. Goodnight." I whispered. I slowly push my door up, hearing the click of my locks.

I stood at the door, feeling Kiba still on the other side. My forehead was pressed against the door as was the back of his head. I heard him wondering why he was such a screwup. Why he couldn't help but feel guilty for my sadness. If only you knew. Kiba also thought of what his friends went through to rescue Sasuke and me.

Neji and Choji near death, Shikamaru a failed leader, Naruto sorrowful and beaten, and him. Angry that he ever trusted me. I let him down. I made a promise and I broke it. My body shook with emotion as I cried. I cried long and hard about my horrible life. Next thing I knew, I was wrapped around warm blankets of my bed. Weeping as the sky weeped with me. Our sorrow traveled throughout the whole village that night. But even through my weeping, I managed to hum my favorite song. It almost.. soothed me. I didn't even get a wink of sleep because of all the tears I had shed. I was only left with hiccups and wondering when it would get better. When I'd accept my wonderful fate?

If 'tis is so wonderful, then why do you wish for it to get better? Because I am truely lonely. I have what I want and yet..

It's not what you truly wanted.

HEYO! Author~chan BACK IN ACTIONNNNN! Yesh. This chapter was..a butload of seriousness. Towards the end at least..

Why must Kiba be such a damn dick? At least we know he cares, right? It's pretty obvious that our dear MC is still pissed at Shomei..heh.

It gets better ladies and gents!

Oh and PS,, Lee is not in love with Mitsuko. I thought it would be funny if he acted all..awkward.. *cough* Chunin exams.. *cough*

Any questions so far dear readers? Next chapter is more emotional..so get the feels ready!

much love,,