Aha... I'm sorry. That's really all I can say.
I'm a second year student in university and I need to have less distractions and do well, and truthfully this story has been on my mind sinde it's close to the end, but I just had no motivation to write.
Needless to say, this is an important chapter and it wont take as long to update the next time.
I'm starting 2010 out in a good way, and updating somewhat regularly is part of that.
Happy New Year, everyone! I hope you enjoy.
This is a late Christmas gift for lauradean
Chapter Eleven
Surprisingly it's hard to fall asleep in a cabin where the walls are thin and most of your friends decide to sneak into each others' rooms to sleep, when they were the ones to make a show of sleeping separately. I really have no idea why they do this to me. Alice and Emmett stopped to have a full blown conversation in the hallway in front of my room before going to join their other halves.
Then I had to listen to Jasper and Alice giggle and talk, which came out sounding like the Charlie Brown adults through the thin walls. Then you could faintly hear squeaking from the room next door to Edward's.
Then you could hear Edward's loud groan and his door swinging open and his footsteps going down the hall to the bathroom while Alice and Jasper laughed at the poor guy's misfortune.
I fell asleep before he flushed the toilet.
When I woke up again the sun was streaming in through the windows and the clock told me it was somewhere nearing the afternoon.
I stumbled my way downstairs, stretching and yawning and savouring the feel of the soft wood floors beneath my bare feet. I froze in the entrance to the kitchen and saw Edward staring at a box of pancake mix looked really confused, a plain white mug held in his hand as he scratched the back of his neck.
When he heard my giggles he looked up and smiled and I stepped farther into the kitchen.
"Morning," he said happily.
"It's still morning?" Amazing. I was sure it'd be some time after lunch.
"Well, barely," he laughed. "How about we make some food and get those lazy bums out of bed?" My lips curled at the grin on his face and I snatched the pancake mix from him, pulling out a bowl.
I turned on the radio as Edward heated up a frying pan and opened up a pack of bacon. Some standard can't-play-our-instruments-can't-write-our-own-lyrics pop band was playing, but neither one of us admitted to knowing all the lyrics. At first it was just his feet tapping- my hips swaying.
Then it was full out Charleston, the running man, Edward even pulled out the lawnmower while I tried some sort of funky chicken-sprinkler combination.
Needless to say there was a tiny bit of mess by the time our friends had wandered downstairs and peered into the kitchen.
"You two are absolutely mad," Rosalie mumbled, filling up a plate with the food we'd made.
Edward's response was throwing a pancake at her face with the happiest smile I'd ever seen on his face. Emmett doubled over in whoops of laughter before Rose did the same to him. Alice and Jasper peacefully left the kitchen with a few laughs.
"Let's go back on the lake today," Emmett suggested as we ate on the patio.
"Swimming again?" Rosalie asked a little exasperatedly.
"Well, yeah," Emmett grinned, "but there's also the canoes, right Jazz? How many do your parents have?"
"Only two, so someone would have to sit out every now and then," he responded through a mouthful of food.
"That's fine," I pitched in. "I'm really, really not that comfortable being so far out in the water."
"Bella you've got two lifeguards here," Emmett laughed. "Not to mention, the rest of us can swim well enough—you can swim well enough."
"Yeah, but out in water that deep, with my luck I'd bring the canoe with me somehow and get pinned to the bottom of the lake," I mumbled, pushing my eggs around.
"We have lots of life vests," Jasper added, a final attempt at making me sit in a piece of wood and push it around the surface of a deep, vast body of water.
"Thanks, but no, I'll just... build a sand castle, or something." Edward smiled at me and rubbed my knee quickly underneath the table.
"I'll keep you company," he said quietly. I smiled at him, happy for what a great friend he was, but mostly glad he'd taken his hand off of my bare knee. I finished my breakfast and pushed my plate under the soapy water before heading upstairs behind Alice and Rosalie. I caught, from the corner of my eye, Edward picking up a dish towel as Jasper stuck his hands in the sink, and Emmett heading outside with the key for the shed.
"They're really great guys, you know," I said quietly. The girls both turned to look at me and smiled.
"I know what you mean," Alice giggled as we walked into her room. "I thought we were going to leave the dishes until later tonight when we came in, but there they are, getting everything ready for us." Alice sighed and pulled out a pair of cut off shorts and a navy tube top to go over her bikini before shutting herself in the closet.
"Edward seems to be awfully close with you these past couple of days, Bella," Rosalie hinted, looking through Alice's things but only finding a pair of sunglasses to swipe from her. I shot her a look and she rolled her eyes, agreeing to be quieter. After all, Alice was his sister, and who knew how much they actually shared with each other.
"He's a nice guy, and a great friend, but I don't think we should be more than that," I said, catching the navy bikini she threw me and turning around as she pulled on her red one.
"I don't know, honey," she sighed. "Maybe you should give him a chance." I shook my head.
"We're just friends, Rose," I said, swallowing a lump in my throat. "Really good friends." No matter what, I had to be his friend. I couldn't deal with not at least being that. He'd flirted with me from the very night I met him, it was just part of who he was and I couldn't look any farther into it than that. Even if he did give me shivers.
"Go put that on," Rose instructed when Alice appeared in the doorway, fixing her hair with her fingertips, successfully spiking it out enough. "And wear... your little jean shorts, and that pink tank top Alice bought for you a couple of weeks ago." With that I scurried out of the room as Alice picked up a brush and hair band to help Rose get ready.
I did as I was told and put on my denim shorts on top of the bathing suit. However, I didn't pack the tank top Rose had wanted me to wear (having foiled Alice's attempts at sneaking it into my bag). I resorted to a plain white v-neck t shirt and my sunglasses, slipping into my low rise converse as I bounded down the stairs ahead of the girls.
"Hey," Edward called from the boardwalk, waving a hand at me. I noticed he had changed into his swim shorts and a shirt exactly like mine. He'd probably swiped them from the laundry room, as had Emmett and Jasper. They smiled at me as they walked past, carrying a canoe above their heads.
"Need any help?" I called down to them.
"Grab the oars, will ya?" Emmett nodded his head to the pile of oars lying by the open shed door. I hoisted them up into my arms, rather clumsily, and started my walk down the boardwalk. I'd picked up the oars clumsily, and they were crossing over each other awkwardly in my arms. Needless to say I'd dropped them a couple times. I barely made it halfway to the beach when Edward hurried up and scooped them from my arms, smiling warmly at me before heading back down to the water.
"Here, dumb-dumb," Rosalie called from the porch. "You forgot your bag of goodies. Alice raced down the boardwalk as fast as she could, tossing my bag into my hand as she went. Rosalie coolly walked down, slipping on her sunglasses as she went.
My bag was full of fly dope, sun screen and various other little things I'd need for a day out on the water in this heat. There were, of course, a couple of snacks.
I stumbled down to the beach and looked down the sand towards the wharf where my five friends were bustling about, setting up the canoes and hauling on life jackets. I watching Edward lean down and speak to Alice while Emmett and Rosalie listening to whatever Jasper was instructing them. I saw their hands pointing out towards an island on the farther side of the lake.
I dropped my bags on the wharf and slipped out of my shoes as Jasper climbed into the canoe with Alice and Edward gave them a push out, despite Emmett and Rosalie's protests that they were getting an unfair advantage. I grinned as I pulled my hair up into a loose ponytail and saw the brightly coloured buckets and shovels Edward had dug out of the shed for us.
"I guess you're serious about this sandcastle business, hey?" I called, finally grabbing his attention as he turned around to look at me. I screamed as he smiled widely and ran at me, frantically trying to get away from him, but he grabbed me around the waist and spun me around before scooping me into his arms and threatening to drop me in the water.
We settled down into the sand, and after swatting Edward's sunscreen covered hands away from my legs I picked up the red pail and filled it with sand. I started plopping bucketfuls of sand all over the place, and Edward began to carefully craft a masterpiece from them.
I felt anxious today for some reason. Like my nerves were trying to tell me something about the outcome of this day; it will be shit, it will be marvellous, it will start something new. I didn't know. And it was making me restless.
So, while Edward started construction on the southern wall of our fortress, I pulled my shirt over my head and dropped my shorts on top of the tower he was working on before running grinning at him. He was frozen, staring up at me while I dropped my glasses onto my clothes and ran to the wharf. I paused when I hit the wooden planks and looked over my shoulder at him. He was stunned, it was clear by the way he was staring and my clothes lying on the sand.
"Edward," I called and he looked up dazedly. "You coming?" I smiled as I watched the grin spread across his lips and he stood up, pulling the shirt over his head and chasing after me. I squealed as I ran to the end of the wharf and jumped, splashing loudly into the cool water. I heard him come in after me and I swam as fast as I could to the floating wharf, pulling myself up before he could catch me.
I watched as his reddish brown head popped out of the water and he flicked the hair from his eyes. He scanned the water, searching for me and I saw his confused expression. I giggled and he caught the sound, spinning around and smiling at me. I laid down on my stomach and rested my chin on my arms at the edge of the wood as he swam up to me.
"You seem awfully energetic today," he said, treading water as he rest his head close to mine.
"It's a beautiful day," was my weak excuse. My voice shook slightly thanks to the way he was looking at me. The sun must have been shining right behind me—his pupils were so small his eyes were mostly green and absolutely beautiful. I heard the water shift as he pushed himself up and closer to me, turning his head to the side as he pressed his lips against mine.
I breathed in sharply through my nose and all I could smell was him. A smell so distinctly summer and freedom and boy. All I could hear were his sharp breaths and maybe if I'd reached my fingers to his neck I could have felt a pulse racing as quickly as my own. I could feel his eyelashes on my cheek as he pulled away just the smallest amount to pull himself up higher, twist his fingers into my hair and kiss me again. I could feel warmth from his skin as he pushed himself out of the water and forced me to sit up in order to keep our lips together.
I heard yelling behind us, loud cheers of victory and we broke apart to look behind us where Jasper and Alice had reached the island first and were climbing out of their canoe, Rose and Emmett close behind them. We both laughed lightly and when I turned back I was still face to chest with him. If I looked up I would have been in for another kiss. I looked up with my eyes and saw him smiling at me, that brilliant green overpowering everything else in my field of vision.
Because I didn't know what to say to him, nor did I think I'd be able to stop if he kissed me like that again, I pushed him into the water. His face lost that calm and cool charm and he looked panicked for a second as he lost his balance and fell under the surface. I fell onto my back laughing and staring up at the clouds. I heard him coughing as he pushed himself onto the wharf and laid down next to me.
"You're cruel," he grumbled, earning a giggle as a response.
"I see a canoe," I sighed, pointing at a cloud. Edward frowned and scrunched up his face.
"Looks more like a rabbit, to me," He mumbled.
"Are you joking?" I scoffed, rolling onto my side to face him. "You can see the oars sticking over the side."
"Bella," he looked at me pointedly. "Those are the ears."
"You're crazy, Edward."
"You love it."
I didn't answer.
We spent hours swimming and mastering our sandcastle. I was pretty big, and I guess kind of intricate. While I'd been swimming I'd picked up pretty rocks like some sort of five year old. Edward excitedly took them each time and poked them into the walls of the castle.
Alright, it looked pathetic.
Neither one of us knew what we were doing and we essentially just had little piles of dirt connected by longer parts of dirt. Well, I did. The sections Edward worked on actually looked really nice but when they were mashed in amongst the ones I'd made, it looked horrible. His enthusiasm was appreciated, nonetheless.
We'd gone swimming a lot, too. Every time our hair had completely dried out and we were starting to feel too warm we'd dive into the water until our skin wrinkled. The other four were wandering about the tiny island, and occasionally we could hear their shouts and laughter. Edward and I sat down on the wharf sharing bags of snacks and listening to my iPod. I kicked my toes through the water and he mimicked the action now and then as we watched our friends climb into the canoe and start to race back.
God love Rosalie Hale. Emmett must have kept her on that island for too long because while he was paddling like mad to get back to shore, Rosalie just kept paddling in the same directions as him, making them go into circles. Sometimes she wouldn't paddle at all and just kept looking at him with wide eyes, her mouth forming a tiny 'o' and insisting she didn't know why they weren't moving.
Jasper and Alice laughed the entire way to the wharf where Edward tied up their canoe. When she saw that she had successfully lost, Rosalie started paddling like a good sport and got the grumpy Emmett to dry land.
"What time is it?" Alice asked as she stretched. Edward checked his iPod and raised his eyebrows in surprise.
"Close to seven."
"Really?! I guess that's right, we didn't really get up until after two." My stomach growled noisily and my cheeks turned bright red. Edward grinned and tossed my shorts and t shirt at me.
"Let's go get some supper, hey?" I nodded and followed behind him quietly, hopping into my clothes and sneakers.
We all helped out with the food again. Alice made us drinks while the boys prepped the chicken and brought it out to barbeque. Rose and I made a green salad and real garlic bread, and then it wasn't long until we were sitting in the living playing old Super Nintendo games while the sun dipped over the horizon and spread an orange light over us.
We passed out with full bellies, everyone of us taking naps across the room in different positions while the music of Super Mario or Super Metroid or Zelda, one of them, was a lullaby for us. I was stretched across the couch, which admittedly didn't have any legs, so it was easy for Edward to let his head fall back into my lap and my hands twist into his hair. Alice and Jasper were squished into a reclining chair and the controller in his hand had fallen to the floor. Emmett was sprawled out on the floor on the many pillows and blankets we'd laid out, and Rosalie's legs were resting in an arm chair while her head was resting on Em's chest.
We were quite the group.
When I woke up it had gotten almost fully dark outside. I gently lifted Edward's head up to slide myself out. He let out a cute little groan before clutching onto a pillow and shoving his face into it. It was a dry night, and through the clouds I could see some stars. There was a fire pit out back and I remembered there were old logs around it that we could sit on. I slipped on my sneakers and grabbed a sweater and went outside to find some kindling.
By the time I'd gathered a small bundle Jasper had come out to help me. He went to take some bigger logs from the wood shed while I went inside and gently shook everyone awake.
"How you guys feel about a bonfire?" Alice squealed and jumped over Emmett and Rose on her way to find enough roasting sticks for everyone. I dug out packets of hot dogs and marshmallows, Rosalie grabbing the extra fixings for s'mores and we went outside.
Jasper had the fire started and was slowly building it up by the time we'd gotten everyone out. Edward was still sleepily confused but he'd been alert enough to grab a blanket off the couch on his way out.
We sat around the fire and roasted marshmallows and hot dogs, ate an entire second meal while the boys told ghost stories. Alice's horror story had involved a hangnail gone wrong, and if I was being honest, it was actually kind of creepy.
"Please don't say the call was coming from inside the house," Rosalie whimpered, hiding behind her blackened marshmallow.
"Nope, no calls from inside the house. But the dog? Licking her hand under the bed?" We all nodded. Emmett grinned. "Her dog was out on the back porch, dead. It was the escaped convict under her bed." The shrieks that filled the woods made my stomach twist in fright. Sure, I'd heard the stories before, but being out here in the dark listening to it told around a fire was something else entirely.
"Okay, enough spooky stories," Jasper said, shivering and holding Alice to him. He finished off a s'more and gave it to her and she smiled appreciatively.
"So are you two looking forward to starting school here?" Rosalie asked, finally picking the ruined piece of confection from her stick.
"Yes! It's been a great summer, but now I'm ready for the fall fashions to get out, not to mention be a bit more productive!" Alice always had a good outlook on things, even the start of the school year.
"I'll just be glad to stop working at the Thriftway," Edward said with a grin and Emmett raised his soda bottle.
"Edward you going to join any sports?" Em asked him while Rosalie started telling Alice all about the different clubs at school.
"I'm probably going to go for track team," Edward said quietly. Emmett and Jasper both started singing the praises of football and baseball and Edward laughed loudly, waving them with his marshmallow sticky finger to quiet down. "I will try out for both football and baseball but I make no promises."
"It's going to be nuts when you guys get to school. I can't remember the last time we had a new kid," Emmett said thoughtfully. Rosalie smacked his head and he looked at her in outrage. "WHAT?!"
"It was me, you moron," she sighed. He thought for a moment and then smiled at her, pecking her on the cheek.
"No one knows you're even here yet, so if they find out you've been here all summer the Spanish Inquisition will start," Rose added.
"That's not true," Emmett grinned. "Jessica Stanley sure as hell knows they're here, am I right?"
That was all it took. I froze, staring at the fire with the remnants of a hotdog in my mouth. I realised I had to keep chewing and listening to the conversation. Alice looked at Emmett, humour gone from her face.
"I mean, the kids at school will know straight away that Alice is taken, but Edward's pretty much fresh meat, you don't stand a chance," they laughed but Alice glanced at me again, taking in my expression. I smiled at her the best I could. "Of course, you'll probably be able to wrap everyone around your finger, right?"
There it was. The affirmation that I didn't know I'd been looking for. The reasons I'd been trying to convince myself all summer that I couldn't get involved with Edward beyond being his friend were right there, laid out in front of me. Emmett knew it. Everyone knew it.
I was just some girl he met his first night in town. His neighbour who showed him around and passed the time with him until everyone came back from vacation and went to school. Until he could pick and choose someone better than me, prettier than me, more popular than me.
I was never good enough, and I knew this, and now someone had confirmed it for me. I would never be the only girl getting shivers and goose bumps for this beautiful boy, I wouldn't be the only one to shiver when his lips were too close. I'd never be the only one to get lost in those amazingly green eyes, and I'd never be the only one to imagine myself just a tiny bit closer to him.
Because that is what girls did with Edward Masen. It was impossible not to. When someone that perfect walks into your life it's impossible not to want to know him or be with him.
I'd been wrong to believe it from the very start.
I stood up straight and pulled my sweater on, feeling the tears start in my eyes and the lumps form in my throat and my nose. I wanted to get out of here, before they could see me truly break down, so I turned and ran.
"Bella?" he called after me, jumping up and running after me, grabbing my arm when I was just outside our little group circle of fun and love and heartache. "Bella, what's wrong?" He asked, his eyes and voice full of the concern any friend would have.
I turned to look at him and I knew they could all see my red face and the tears running hotly out of my eyes. I had to get away.
"I can't fall in love with you," I breathed out and he froze. His hold on my arm slackened and his mouth dropped open as his eyes widened in surprise. A sobbed choked my throat until I nearly screamed it out and I turned and ran down the dark dirt road as fast as I could.