He-he-hello, and welcome to yet another chapter of New Bea-whoops, wrong story, sorry. What I meant to say was, welcome to yet another chapter of...THEY JUST DON'T CARE ANYMORE! Chapter 11. Once again, I must admit that I do not own The Transformers, nor do I own the characters that are associated with The Transformers...damn. Anyway, I really hope that you enjoy this chapter, I worked really hard to make it funny, so, I hope you do find it funny...anyway, hope you enjoy it and don't forget to leave a review. Thanks for reading!
In the Autobot base, Huffer and Bluestreak were standing around a water cooler, talking and drinking.
"My God, what's the point of it all Bluestreak? I mean, we are but brief sparks, to be forever extinguished by the water bucket of time...I made myself sad." Huffer said with a sigh.
"Jeez, you are, without a doubt, the worst person I have ever met." Bluestreak said as he rolled his eyes.
Inferno suddenly rounded a corner.
"Hey guy's whacha doin'?" Inferno asked.
"Oh, we were lamenting how cruel and brief existence is! Oh, how fate conspires against-Argh!" Huffer cried as Bluestreak kicked him in the stomach, knocking him over.
"Freakin' pessimists! They creep me out man!" Bluestreak said, spitting contemptuously.
"So true...can I shove this fire hose full of napalm down his throat?" Inferno asked, holding up his hose.
Bluestreak considered it, before shaking his head "As much as I would like to say yes, Jazz would probably kill me if I let you."
Huffer got back to his feet "Bastard." He muttered.
"Yeah, I love you too." Bluestreak said, rolling his eyes again "Hey Inferno, want to check out this new lighter I bought?"
Inferno's eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas morn "Really? You have a new lighter?" Inferno asked in wonder.
"Sure, I think I got it right...here!" Bluestreak said as he rummaged through his pockets to produce a little Inferno shaped lighter "See? It's you! And look, the flame comes out of the fire hose!"
Suddenly, Inferno started grinning. And soon, his grin got bigger and bigger, until it stretched from one side of his face to the other. The grin dominated his face, a fact which did not go unnoticed by Huffer.
"Oh Shit! Run" Huffer screamed.
"Why?" Bluestreak asked, perplexed.
"He's haaaaappppppyyyyyy!" Huffer yelled as he ran off at top speed.
"Huh?" Bluestreak asked, before turning, the sight chilled his...whatever Autobots have for blood.
Standing over him was a crazed looking Inferno, a manic grin on his face, and eyes that continuously twitched. In his hands he held a fire hose which was dripping napalm.
"I'M SO HAPPY!" Inferno exclaimed, drool and foam dripping from his mouth.
Bluestreak shrieked in terror, before he too turned to flee.
"Super happy napalm fun time!" Inferno shrieked as he sprayed napalm out of his mighty hose of doom.
"What's all the commo-? Oh, Christ! He's at it again!" Jazz frowned as he saw Inferno destroy their base "Attention all Autobots! Inferno's gone crazy again! Somebody get the quantum disintegrator or something!" Jazz called out.
Inferno meanwhile, had begun singing as he destroyed stuff.
"Iron birds of fortune! Adrift above the skies!" Inferno sung as he began torching a fire extinguisher, which promptly exploded.
"He's gone berserk! Get him!" Eject cried, before charging at Inferno, backed up by Gears, Grimlock, Jetfire, Air Raid and Fireflight.
Inferno's grin actually seemed to widen and he changed songs "I'm singin' in the napalm! Just singin' in the napalm!" Oblivious to the screams of pain that were coming from the Autobots he was soaking.
Starscream's ghost happened upon the scene and whimpered, which turned into a scream as Inferno set his sights upon Starscream's ghost, his monster grin still adorning his face.
"Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!" Starscream's ghost screamed as he ran in the opposite direction, arms flailing wildly.
"What the-?" Jazz asked as Starscream's ghost rocketed past him "What a freak." Jazz muttered.
Jazz rounded the corner to see how the others were faring...only to see their melted remains littering the corridor, Inferno dancing and spraying napalm everywhere.
"Sssssssssssssssshit." Jazz said, eyes wide at the sight.
Inferno suddenly turned and saw Jazz "Napalm!" Inferno cried.
"Holy crap!" Jazz yelled, before he turned and ran, followed closely by Inferno, who was firing a continuous stream of napalm from his hose "Must...escape...must...abandon...others...to...murderous...lunatic!" Jazz panted as he ran.
In the Decepticon base, Cyclonus was passing by when he heard some strange noises coming from Ramjet's room. Curious, Cyclonus poked his head in to see Ramjet on his computer.
"Ramjet, what are you doing? Are you ogling that cat girl who teaches Japanese online again?" Cyclonus asked.
"No, I'm over her...until she uploads her next video. Right now I'm playing one of those online games!" Ramjet replied, not looking away from his computer screen.
"Online games? Isn't that a little...nerdy?" Cyclonus questioned.
"No! All the cool celebrities do it! Vin Diesel, Judi Dench, that Australian guy! Plus, Lisa Foiles operates her own video game website!" Ramjet countered.
"Um, actually, I think those first three only playthat Gary Gygax game...Something's and Something's...who's Lisa Foiles?" Cyclonus asked.
Ramjet sighed "You'll never understand Cyclonus, get out of my room"
As soon as he was out of the room Cyclonus muttered to himself "Freakin' weirdos!"
Back in his room, Ramjet made sure that Cyclonus was gone before opening up his second tab "Oh Japanese speaking catgirl, never stop teaching." Ramjet murmured.
"I heard that ya freak!" Cyclonus yelled through the walls.
Ramjet turned red "Hey shut up man!"
Back in the Autobot base, Jazz was still running from Inferno.
"Come back! I just wanna set you on fire!" Inferno cried.
"Gotta hide! Gotta hide!" Jazz gasped, before ducking into a closet.
"You better not have brought him here!" A voice in the dark said.
"Wha-?" Jazz asked, before turning on the light.
With him was Huffer, Bluestreak, Perceptor, Blaster, Starscream's ghost and Cloudraker.
"Napalm time!" Inferno cried.
"...Jazz you son of a bitch..." Cloudraker said, glaring daggers at Jazz.
"Aha!" Inferno cried, kicking down the door.
"Oh crap." Blaster said.
Suddenly, Inferno was sent flying.
"Wha-?" Jazz asked, stepping out of the closet.
He saw what had knocked Inferno down...Dirge!
"I am sick and tired of you creeps killing me every single day! Well you know what? Now it's my turn baby!" Dirge said as he tackled Inferno again.
Inferno hissed in rage, before trying to aim his hose at Dirge. Dirge however, ripped the hose off and began pummelling Inferno with his bare hands.
"Holy crap." Bluestreak said, gaping at the sight "Did any of you know that Dirge was a closet badass?"
All of them answered in the negative.
"...And this is for the time you stuck the hose down my throat! And this is for the time you dipped me in cement and left me to dry!" Dirge said as he punched Inferno into a messy pulp.
"Uh...should we run? He's almost done with Inferno." Perceptor pointed out.
"Aw, how much damage could he do?" Blaster asked "He's Dirge!"
Suddenly, Dirge turned and glared at the others "Don't think I haven't forgotten about you freaks!" Dirge growled as he transformed...into a weapons array.
"Eep." Cloudraker said, as Starscream's ghost wailed in despair.
Suddenly, a gigantic laser blast came through the roof, vaporising Dirge and leaving a gigantic scorch mark in the ground.
"Huh?" Perceptor asked, looking up through the hole.
"Aha! Behold the glory that is Sunstreaker and his diamond powered satellite! Kneel pitiful creatures, kneel!"
And...End of chapter 11. Well, what did you think? I certainly hope that you enjoyed it, even though it's just a little shorter than normal, blame it on work related fatigue, I guess. Anyway, kind of violent, but don't worry, all of the Autobots who ran afoul of Inferno are still alive and well...just very badly scarred, mentally and physically. Well, I hope that you liked it, I'll have another chapter up as soon as possible, and don't forget to leave a review. Oh yeah, and thanks for reading!