I was never sure whether or not to write this chapter. I wrote it surprisingly quickly, the words just seemed to make themselves. But I want to know your opinion on this chapter. Please, feel free to review.

Chapter 11 – Never Come Back

Edmund woke up. Above him was a roof made of straw, and the sun filtered gently through the cracks. He laughed; this place was so different from his palace, his Cair Paravel. But he would rather be here than anywhere else in the world. This was where Acontia was, this was where his heart was, this was his home. Acontia was asleep, entwined in his arms. The two of them had fallen asleep on her pathetic little bed made out of straw, but they had been together and that had been heavenly.

Edmund climbed carefully out of the bed so as not to wake Acontia. He got dressed leisurely and walked outside, drinking in the cool morning air. Firth and Waen were still asleep together in the field with their little foal snuggled in-between them. Edmund smiled, he had never been so happy. Edmund turned his eyes towards the forest, a log had fallen down and Edmund noticed a small nest that had fallen. The eggs that had been in the nest had crashed and lay there, the beautiful blue of the shells crumbled, and shattered.

Edmund walked further, chewing like a farmer on a blade of grass. The morning was beautiful; there was not a cloud in the sky. Today would be great. Edmund walked quite far and reached a farm where they where they were shearing sheep. They looked like they needed an extra hand so Edmund took off his shirt and helped him. The farmer had offered him ale and Edmund joked around with the farmers. They had laughed and run races and had wrestling competitions on that sunny day. Edmund never told them his name and so they never found out who he was. If they had known that he was their king his day would not have been so great, they would have treated him differently. Edmund liked being equal to his people. The day passed easily and it was almost evening when Edmund returned to Acontia's house.

He entered smiling and singing. Today he had not been King Edmund the Just, but a simple traveller helping locals. It had been rejuvenating. He entered the house all smiles and happiness. But his heart stopped when he saw Acontia. She was so beautiful, but sitting there on the bed she looked so sad. Edmund could not understand why.

"How was your day?" She asked, faking a smile.

"Incredible, this place is somewhere where time stops and joy echoes from all around. I love it, I want to stay here forever." He replied, perhaps she just needed something to lighten her mood a little.

"You know you can't do that." Her face was serious as she looked at him, "You cannot stay here forever."

"No, but we will often have to visit this place." Edmund said, he knew that they would have to return to Cair Paravel all too soon, he just wanted to stay here for ever.

"We?" Acontia said, "Who said I was leaving?"

"But you're coming back to Cair Paravel right?" Edmund said, his eyes brimming with confusion. It had not even occurred to him that Acontia would not come with him.

Acontia drew away and walked slowly towards the door where the sunlight was flooding in. She could not bear to look at Edmund.

"No, I am not going back to the Cair." She did not look at him as she said the next words. "We cannot be together. I don't love you any longer. Yesterday I was confused which is why I acted why I did. What I did and said yesterday mean nothing. I cannot come back with you."

"Why? Why this sudden change?" Edmund said, striding over to her, he was about to put his arms around her and turn her around to face him so that she could explain this ridiculous behaviour. But he saw she was crying. "Why Acontia, you're crying? Why are you crying?

Acontia tensed and said through closed teeth "I cry for all the things you said about me, these tears that fall like rain are for all the lies, for all the hurt and for all the pain you caused me Edmund! You called me a traitor. That was a lie. You called me a murderer. That was a lie. It hurt me Edmund; every word you said hurt me and broke me."

"You know that I am sorry for that, Acontia, I apologised, please forgive me Acontia."

"It's too late Edmund."

"What? You won't come back because you can't forgive me. But you forgave me yesterday. Acontia, you confuse me, please speak, why did you say that you won't come back to the Cair?"

"It's about Ama and Peter." She whispered, still facing away from Edmund.

"What?" Edmund said, why was Acontia acting like this, Edmund had forgiven her, now she should just forgive him. Why couldn't she?

"You told them yourself that I had killed their son, their eldest most precious son. You said I was a murderer. They hate me. They despise me. They would have me killed right here and now if they could. And you Edmund, you fed their anger and their sorrow. You are not without blame. I cannot return back to the Cair. Don't you understand?"

"No, I don't understand." Edmund said frustrated, "I will explain everything to Peter and Ama, I will tell them that it was you who found the cure. They will understand, they will forgive you."

"They will not forgive me for killing their son."

"You did not kill Morlaeth, you eased his passing. Peter will understand."

"You Pevensies, you are of strong blood, every one of you is brave, and you would fight to the death for what you love. But you have your defects, you are stubborn, sometimes impatient, and with a large temper. Sometimes you overcome these defects," Acontia sighed, "Sometime you don't. That's the problem you are stubborn, you keep your grudges, Peter won't forget what I did, nor will Ama for that matter. They will forever remember me as the woman who killed their son. They won't forgive me."

"Don't you see: I don't care. I don't care what Peter thinks, or what Ama thinks or what anybody else in the whole wide world thinks. I came here because I love you. I came here because I wanted you to forgive me. I knew that it would be hard for you to forgive me, forgive me for all I said. I could foresee the bitter scorn in your eyes when I would arrive at your doorstep; I knew that I would see hate blazing from those proud eyes of yours. But still I came. I came to take you back and I will take you back with me, back to the Cair."

"No, I will not come with you. It would split your family apart. It would destroy you and Narnia. I would not be the cause of that."

"No, Acontia, you cannot mean this, you cannot mean what you say." Edmund said, he turned her around so that he could see her, so that he could watch her tears fall down her face. Those eyes which had once been so full of life and light were now dark with sorrow. The love that he had seen in them earlier was no more. Her eyes looked at him uncaring.

"If I went back Edmund, if I went back with you, there would be scandal."

"It would be brief," Edmund retorted, he tried to kiss her gently on the lips but she pulled away.

"No, it would break apart your family."

"I don't care, Acontia, I don't care. I want you. I need you." Edmund was shouting now. Acontia stood there for a moment in silence, when she next spoke it was but a whisper.

"I would like you leave me now, I would like you to go back to the Cair and forget all about me. I would like you to go and marry a quiet woman who would not kill children or do anything but sit silently by your side and bear you a strong and a healthy family. I would like you to leave Edmund."

"I can't." He said, his voice now verging on breaking with tears.

"Why?"

"Because I love you." Edmund said, now looking straight into her dark eyes. "I love you."

"Why this sudden change? You hated me. It would have been easier like that Edmund. I would have remained here. We would have loved apart. But you had to come back. You had to come back to break my heart, to give me false hope that we could be together again."

"No, I did not come to break your heart, I came to heal it."

"Oh, Edmund, you never broke my heart." Acontia looked at him her eyes blazing, "You held it up high and threw it down to the ground. You shattered my heart into thousands of tiny little pieces which I cannot put back together. Go, before you hurt me again."

"No, I came here to be with you. I did not come here to leave you alone."

"Why did you have to come? Why?" She wept.

"I had to see you. I love you. I see the scorn you have for me. I know you hate me for coming Acontia, but my dearest, my only love, I had to come to you, I had to see you. It is no secret that I love you. I put my heart with you, the fragile and tender shooting star that you are. Yes you can be powerful Acontia – you killed Sorugyn when I could not, but your heart is delicate. I put all my love in you, all my faith and if you tear away now I will be rootless, estranged from all. That is what I did to myself when I condemned you. I cannot live through it again. I thought that liberty and peace would serve instead of happiness. How wrong I was Acontia, how wrong? I have been punished every day for calling you a murderer and a traitor. But now I long for you, to be with you, to follow you everywhere, to see every one of your smiles, every movement of your eyes, to dwell upon your soul's perfection, and to listen to your voice. That is my bliss Acontia; don't cut me off from it. My time here is short – I am not immortal like you, every hour and every day is precious to me and I do not wish to live this precious time without meaning, I wish to live in bliss with you Acontia."

"You cannot, Edmund, you cannot." He held her in his arms, but she could not look at him.

"The whole world is a desert without you. I have no purpose to live if you are not by my side. You do not know the flames that burn within me and consume my heart. I cannot struggle against them anymore. I am yours entirely."

"No." Was the only word she could utter.

"Why do you deny your own heart? Do you not love me?" Edmund shook Acontia, she looked at him but she kept her silence. "Acontia, be my wife. I have no ring to offer you, but I know that is not what you want or need. I stand here before you as poor as a farmhand, and I offer you my heart and my never-ending love. Acontia, will you marry me?"

Acontia took several steps away from him. She sat down on the small and creaking bed and put her head in her hands. "You offer me a place by your side? You offer me to become princess, to help in the ruling of Narnia?"

"Yes, I do."

"You are mistaken Edmund," Acontia said standing up, she began to pace the room; "I could never be princess. I am not that woman. I could never rule. And to marry you? No, I could not. You would grow old and I would not age a day. I would watch you die, and it would kill me, it would destroy me more painfully and more agonisingly than you could ever imagine. I would be powerless as you died. I would remain only to mourn and for decades and centuries I would walk the earth shedding rivers of tears of sorrow for my lost love. If I love you, I must lose you."

"It is better to lose and love than not to love at all." Edmund said watching her from the door.

"No, Edmund I cannot come with you. It would destroy …"

"Stop Acontia! Hear me!" Edmund shouted.

"No!"

"Hear me!" Acontia stopped pacing the room and looked at Edmund, "Think of others. Think of your faithful mare Waen. She loves you, but she also loves her husband Firth. They have had their first foal and it will need both parents to raise it. Waen will have to come back to the Cair with the foal, because Firth cannot stay here. He has sworn to serve me and I must return to the Cair. But Waen similarly has sworn to serve you forever. She would not leave you. If you come to the Cair she comes also and doesn't break her heart. If you stay here Waen has to make the decision as to whether to go with the Firth – the one she loves or to stay with you – the person she has sworn to serve forever."

"I have already talked with Waen; she is to go with you. I am staying here."

"No." Edmund said walking close to her. They were no more than a few inches away but they did not dare to touch. "Please, I beg you come with me."

Acontia let out a deep breath and slowly return to the bed where she perched lightly on the side. "My life is empty and hollow. I have no purpose here. I am useless. I am no good as a farmhand or as a haggler at the local market stall. I was made for high courts, I was made to sit by Aslan's side. I was not made for a humble life. All that you see around me I would happily exchange for the life that you offer me, for the life I had."

"Yes," Edmund whispered, his ears heard the sounds but could not register them, was she finally coming to her senses. Was she finally going to agree to come back? "Tell me that you feel nothing, or tell me that you love me. Trust in your heart and come back."

Acontia slowly turned her eyes towards Edmund who stood there above her, watching every movement of hers like a predator watches its prey, "You called me a traitor Edmund. You turned your brother and his wife against me. You condemned me to death, and now you come begging for me to come back."

Acontia looked at Edmund waiting for him to say something. He could not deny what she had just said; every word of it was true. So he said the only thing that he could. "Tell me that you love me. Tell me that you want to be with me."

Acontia shook her head and looked away again. "I loved you once, before you called me a traitor and a murderer."

"I was wrong Acontia, I am the liar. Forgive me." Edmund could feel the tears that were prickling in his eyes, he realised he was fighting a losing battle.

"I loved you once Edmund."

"You haven't forgotten."

"No." Her voice choked on the tears she was trying to hide.

"Acontia." He walked up to her, so close. She edged away. "I beg you… be with me." Every word was filled with emotion and sorrow. Every word meant so much to the both of them.

"You told me that I was a traitor. You said you had never loved me because you had never realised who I was." She was standing up now, clenching her teeth and hands in anger; if she had not, her hands and teeth would had flown to attack him. She both hated and loved Edmund. Edmund only loved her. "I never stopped loving you Edmund. But you broke my heart. Lucy told me it would heal with time. So will yours, your heart will heal in time."

"Has it healed, Acontia has your heart healed?" Edmund said, looking urgently in her eyes.

She turned away; she could not bear to look at him. "Oh, By Aslan's mane, it hurts. My heart hurts me." She began to shake and had to walk over to the bed so that she would not fall over from weakness of soul. She began to sniff at her tears and Edmund knew the answer but still he asked the question.

"Has your heart healed?" He knew that he had won this round in the battle; that she had realised that she still loved him no matter what she said. "I don't think it has, has it?"

She brought her hands to her eyes trying to hide the tears, "It hurts." She muttered under her breath.

"Why, why does it hurt, Acontia?" Edmund asked kneeling down beside her. Acontia did not answer him, but continued to sob. "Tell me why does it hurt."

"Because you are too late." She shouted, her face flushed from the tears. She beat down her hand on her lap in anger and in pain. "You set Peter and Ama and Susan against me. If I go back now I would have more enemies than I would have friends. We can't be together Edmund. I am glad for the time that we had Edmund but it is over. "

Edmund shook his head – this could not be true. She could not be saying goodbye. Not now.

"Yes." She said denying him, "You are too late. If you had pardoned me earlier they all would have forgiven me. But it is too late."

Edmund could not hold the tears back any longer. "Save me. Save my heart."

"These tears you cry have come too late, Edmund. You cannot take back the hurt and the blame and the lies. They are here still in my head and I shall remember even when the last day of this world shall come. I will remember all that you said to me. Yes, Edmund it is your turn to weep. You will weep when you face the end alone; you will be lost now as I was lost. "

"No Acontia, don't be so cruel to me. Why are you so cruel? Save me, Acontia save me!"

He was kneeling, clutching onto her with all might. He would never let her go. "I cannot save you." She said through tears.

"You can save me."

"I cannot."

"Tell me that you love me. Tell me one last time." Edmund begged, holding her warm hands in his which were as cold as death. "Please tell me. Lie to me. Tell me that you still love me."

She put her hand on his cheek, and tears ran down her face, like waterfalls on an early winter's day. "I love you." She whispered, almost afraid to say it. "I do. I love you, but you must go. There's nothing more to say Edmund. You must go before I break back down and fall straight into your arms."He rested his face on her hand and smelt the sweet sorrowful smell that she carried with her. "I am an enemy to your brother, don't you understand, I cannot come back. Look at me Edmund, look at me and understand."

She held his face in her hands and turned it so that he could look into her eyes. But all that Edmund could see were the tears clouding his vision.

"You must go, Edmund. You must go." He shook his head in defiance. He took her hands and kissed them, passionately.

"No!" He uttered from behind sealed teeth.

"You must go. Yes, you must go. You must leave me, please. Please! I cannot see you again, Edmund, you can never come back here. Never come back. Please." She kissed him lightly on the head. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

She got up and left, tears still falling from her proud eyes. She turned around and looked at him one last time.

Was that a surprise or expected? Did they make the right decision or not? And I promise next chapter Peter will make an appearance.