It had been three weeks since the hostage situation that Derek was involved in. Ever since that day Meredith had been hanging around him constantly, never leaving his side. From the moment she realised that she could have lost Derek forever something dawned on her. She wasn't afraid anymore, she wanted this, this child with him more than anything in the world, she wanted a lifetime, forever. Ever since that day, neither Derek nor Meredith had step foot inside her house. Izzie and George had moved straight back in after the scene was cleaned up. Meredith just wanted things to go back to normal, but she knew that Derek didn't want to step foot inside that house, especially after the ordeal that he went through, he just kept coming up with lame excuses and different reasons why he didn't want to go back. They had spent the last few weeks at the trailer. Meredith was now just past the four month mark in her pregnancy.
It was around 5am in the morning and Meredith was lying in bed on side asleep. Suddenly the alarm went off and she reach over to nudge Derek to switch it off. She lifted her head and noticed that Derek's side of the bed was completely empty. She stretched over his pillow and turned off the alarm. Sitting up in the bed she realised what time it was and rushed out of bed and quickly changed into her clothes.
"Derek?" she said as she opened the trailer door and peered onto the deck. Still Derek was nowhere to be found. One thought crossed her mind "Fishing" so she took a seat on one of the deck chairs and begun to stare at the clearing overlooking the water. After a moment of pondering the view Meredith stood up and decided to walk over to that very spot near the water where she and Derek had buried Doc a couple of months before. She stood before the little grave they had made for him, and she wandered off in her thoughts.
"Hi" she heard a familiar voice say.
"Hey" she replied when she felt Derek creep up behind her and wrap his arms around her waist, resting his hands on the tiny baby bump that was protruding from her stomach.
"You ok?" he asked as he kissed her neck tenderly
"Yeah, I was just thinking" She replied
"About?" He said as she continued to kiss her neck
"I was thinking that maybe we could try sleeping at my place tonight, I mean I have to go back there sometime, and I can't keep living in your trailer forever" she said as she placed her hands on top of his, which were still resting on her stomach.
"Why not? It's peaceful and relaxing and there are no room mates, just us, together." He replied as he began to sway her from side to side.
"I know but it's really small and I can't live here when the baby's born I mean, there's no room." She said as they continued to sway.
"I know it's just I want to spend as much time with you as possible before the baby comes." He said as he placed his chin on her shoulder and began admire the view of the water in front of them.
"Look Derek if you don't want to go back because of what happened I'm totally fine with it" Meredith said before she was cut off
"... Look Mer I'm fine with going back if that's what you want, it's just that I want to spend these next few quiet months we have together, together" He said as she turned her around in his arms
"Yeah ok. Together" Meredith replied as she rested her head onto Derek's chest.
"Together, with sex?" he laughed
"No sex! I'm not going to cave, I'm not that easy to break." She giggled
"Oh really?" he asked before tilting his head and kissing her passionately.
"Mmm" he moaned into her mouth
"Der... Mmm... Der..." Meredith stuttered between kisses "STOP!" she laughed
"What am I making you horney?" He laughed once more.
"Yes, but we are taking things slow ok, remember." She said before hitting him over the chest.
"Do you miss him?" Derek said as he turned Meredith around a retuned his hands to her stomach.
"Yeah, I just feel so guilty" She said
"Why? Meredith you knew there wasn't a chance. And we did the best thing for him, Finn... Finn did everything he could." Derek replied
"I know, I just miss him." She said as she placed her hand on her small bump over his
"Me too. But look on the bright side, we're gonna have our hands full soon." He smiled as he began to rub his thumb up and down her belly. Meredith sighed at the feeling he was giving her, she moved her head back and rested it on his shoulder. Every time he touched her body her skin tingled, and her whole body heats up on contact. She loved that Derek made her feel this way. Especially when we touched her stomach she was totally overcome with love and joy, it just maded her want to cry,
"Stupid hormones" she whispered
"What?" Derek asked
"Nothing, you're just so... I think I'm gonna cry" she whimpered
"What why?" he asked in a worried tone
"It's the stupid hormones" She laughed trying not the let out a sob. She moved her fingers across her cheek bone whipping away her tears which were slowly creeping down her face.
"Hey, come here" Derek whispered into her ear before turning her around and kissing her contently on her lips. "Come on let get you some breakfast."
XXXXXXX
When Meredith arrived at the hospital she walked into the locker room to find her fellow interns getting changed.
"Hi" she said as she made her way over to her locker
"Hey" George said
"Heey" Izzie said as she rushed over to her "So?"
"Sooo ?" Meredith asked as she frowned as Izzie before laughing.
"How are things with you and McDreamy?" She asked grinning "I feel like I don't see you anymore, you're always at the trailer"
"I know sorry, it's just I don't think Derek's ready to come back to the house yet" she continued as he pulled out her scrubs from her locker
"Have you talked about it?" Cristina interrupted
"Not really, I'm not going to force the issue, I mean things are finally great between us and I don't want to mess anything up." Meredith said as she took of her jeans and changed into her scrub pants. "I'm just going to wait until he's ready you know." She said as she pulled off her Tee-shirt and reached for her scrub top, she turned and noticed that all her friends were staring at her. "What?" she asked frowning at them.
"What, Erm nothing, what's the time?" George said hesitantly looking at his wrist that hadn't even occupied a watch.
"What, nothing it's just..." Izzie began as she smiled as she stared at Meredith stomach
"You're pregnant" Alex blurted out
"Well no freaking way Karev" Cristina laughed, as did the other interns
"No I mean, you can see it so now it's like..." Alex continued
"... Real" Izzie finished grinning
"Yeah I know" Meredith said as she pulled her top over her head. "Ok can we all stop looking at my stomach now, please" she asked them.
"Yes why don't you all do as Dr Grey said, I'm sure looking at a pregnant belly is fun for you, but I have even more fun things for you to do today." Dr Bailey said as she entered the locker room. Suddenly everyone jumped and turned to face their boss. "Ok Karev, Montgomery-Shepherd has requested you're capable hands, O'Malley you're with the Chief, Stevens you can shadow Dr O'Malley today. Remembering the rules to your probation, Yang you're with Burke and Grey, Dr Shepherd has asked for you on Neuro today. What ya'll waiting for. MOVE!" Seconds later everyone began you shift out of the room.
XXXXXX
"So I think I'm going to sleep at my place tonight" Meredith said to Cristina as they walked through the corridors for the hospital.
"Ok then, do it" Cristina replied
"Yeah but I don't want to leave Derek alone, and he won't sleep at my place" Meredith continued
"Look I'm sure if you ask him nicely he will." Cristina said as she placed her chart down onto the nurse's station.
"No, there's nothing I can do or say that will make him want to sleep there" Meredith said as she moved round the desk to grab a chart.
"Bribe him, with sex. That usually works" Cristina laughed
"No I can't" Meredith said giving Cristina a shy look
"What why?" Cristina giggled
"Because we're not having sex" she whispered
"What, you and McDreamy have gone cold turkey, how longs that been going on?" Cristina giggled
"Erm... Since before that thing happened at my house."
"You are kidding me? Mer I'm surprised you've lasted this long, I mean with your hormones and everything, you much be going crazy" Cristina said more loudly
"Yeah do you want to say that again I don't think the people in the Space Needle heard you."
"Why's Meredith going crazy?" Izzie asked as she walked over to them with George.
"Meredith and McDreamy have gone cold turkey!" Cristina said as she continued to fill out her chart.
"Cristina!" Meredith shouted
"What? No sex? Mer you must be dying inside. You can't last like two days without sex" Izzie giggled
"I can so last without any sex, and how do you know" She said stubbornly
"Mmm... Erm" she said looking at George for a little back up.
"Well..." Izzie begun
"...You're just kinda loud" George finished
"What? I am not!" Meredith gasped
"Yeah you kinda are" Izzie giggled
"Well at least I'm getting sex which is more than I can say for the both of you" Meredith argued back
"Ok I'm leaving now" Cristina said as she handed her chart to a nurse and walked away.
"Yeah but you're not getting any sex" Izzie continued
"Well at least I have the option of having sex. So whatever" Meredith frowned and walked away.
"I think you hurt her feelings" George said as he placed his hands on his hips staring at Izzie
"I can get sex! I can get sex whenever I want" Izzie continued
"So can I!" George agreed nodding
"Who from? Callie broke up with you remember!" Izzie laughed "We're gonna be alone forever aren't we?" Izzie continued,
"Yep" George agreed. Suddenly their pager's went off
"Let's go" George said as he made his way to the elevator, and Izzie followed.
XXXXXX
It was late in the evening and Meredith was on call that night. She was standing at the nurse's station filling out a chart, when she saw Derek enter an on-call room at the other end of the corridor. She closed her chart and handed it to the nurse behind the desk before walking down the hallway towards the room in which Derek had walked into. As she pulled down the door handle it stopped halfway and she realised that he must have locked it. She quietly knocked on the door and whispered his name.
"Derek?" She muttered "Derek, you in there?" She asked
"Erm, yeah. Sorry" He said as she heard the door unlock
"Hey" she said as he opened the door and smiled at her.
"Hi" he replied as she walked into the on-call room and stood behind him
"Derek, are you ok?" she asked as he closed the door
Derek stood resting both his hands on the door facing away from Meredith. He could feel her eye's watching him as he tried to hold back his tears
"Derek, talk to me" Meredith said as she walked closer to him. She inched herself closer until she was standing right behind him. She placed her small hand around his waist and rested her head on his shoulder blade.
"I'm sorry it's just that... It was alot, everything I saw, I mean..." he begun as he turned around and walked over to the bed before sitting down on it. "... That poor man, killed his own son, his son. I just can't imagine how he must be feeling. I don't know anyone could do that. To lose a child in that way. In any way it's just horrific." He said trying to fight back the tears
"Is that what this is about...?" Meredith asked as she sat next to Derek "You're scared of losing the baby?" Meredith continued
"Well of course I am, and after seeing how easy it is to lose someone you love. I just..." he sobbed
"Hey. It's ok..." Meredith said as she placed her hands onto Derek's hair and pulled his head onto her chest "... Derek, you are never going to lose me or the baby. We're not going anywhere. I can promise you that" She continued
They sat there for a while embraced in each other's arms.
"I love you" Meredith whispered into his ears as she picked up his hand and placed it onto her stomach
"I love you too" she replied
Ok so I'm sorry this chapter was not as good. I didn't really know what to write. I've just created a new fic and I've been writing chapters for that today, and I guess my minds still sort of over in that story. But I did my best. Don't for get to review. They make my day! But i have some ideas for this story so don't abandon it yet! =P
Oh P.S Martin died, yeah he didn't make it, and I guess I'm leaving it up to your imagination to how he died. I was gonna write it all into a chapter but I figured that Derek wouldn't operate on someone after he had just been through all that... ok so I'm rambling now so I'm gonna go :)