XI
"Cloud."
I managed to squeeze a grunt in between all of my panting, as I lay on my back in the center of the football field, staring up at the cloudless blue sky. A fifty pound weighted vest lie still in the heat a few inches away, sweat stains covering the nylon.
"How's your Mom doing?"
"Fine."
"Just fine?"
"Yeah, just fine," I said, exhaling loudly as I got to my feet. Break time was over. "I don't really want to talk about that right now, Aerith."
I slid into my vest, zipping it up, and got used, again, to the feeling of having heavy plates on the front of my chest and lower back. A quick glance over to my training partner told me he was ready. Reeve pulled the rubber band from his wrist, pulling it over his head and using it to hold his shoulder-length hair up and out of his eyes. He scratched the patchy beginnings of a beard as he nodded to me. Aerith, sitting on the ground reading a book, sighed as she closed it, getting to her feet and walking a few yards away.
"Ready?" Reeve asked me.
I nodded.
"Go!" I called, dropping to the ground. I pumped out twenty five pushups, grunting in exhaustion with the final one. Reeve hopped to his feet, unencumbered by any vest, as we sprinted ten yards, touched the line, and then sprinted back.
Next, twenty five knee jumps. I leapt as high as I could, drawing my knees into my chest, and then landed. And repeated, twenty four more times. Aerith lounged across the metal bench, reading her book, basking in the late afternoon sun.
"Next station," I panted, really feeling the weight of the vest. We sprinted ten yards, and then back. I grabbed the Buster Sword football, getting set in an athletic stance. Ten yard high steps, eyes downfield, ball up and ready. Once I hit the goal, the football was dropped, and Reeve and I ran another set of lines.
Blinking sweat from my eyes, I dropped into an athletic stance. Reeve stood in front of me.
"Ready?" He asked. I nodded and started running forward.
Reeve put his hands on my shoulders, pushing me backwards with every ounce of strength he had. My heart thumped wildly, arms pumping, legs churning, as I fought against him to gain ground. With a mighty roar, I put all that I had left in the tank into pushing through Reeve and forcing the receiver backward step by step, until he had stumbled back back ten yards.
I drank in the warm air, breath coming in ragged gasps as I brushed my sweat soaked hair back.
"Not too bad," Reeve said beside me, using the collar of his shirt to mop the sweat from his head. I unzipped the vest, dropped it on the turf, and collapsed back onto the ground, spread eagle, staring into the sky.
A water bottle, flying through the air like a missile, landed just outside my torso, bouncing and rolling up against my side. Sitting up, I grabbed the plastic bottle and promptly guzzled half of it, dumping the rest over my head and sighing in content at the cold water. Aerith walked over to where I sat, dropping down and sitting next to me, continuing to read her book.
"You hear where everyone's going to school?" Aerith asked me, her eyes not leaving the page.
"Not everyone. I know Rude got a full ride to Costa del Sol, and I know Rufus ain't going to school."
"Scarlet's going to Cosmo Canyon Community College," Reeve blurted out, letting his hair down. Aerith looked up at the normally quiet man. "She, uh, she's going to try to get her grades up and then, uh, go to C.C.U. next year."
"And why's that, I wonder?" Aerith smiled. Reeve blushed and turned his attention to tying his shoe.
"You didn't ask about Reno."
"Reno? College?" Aerith snorted. "Fat chance of that. He barely scraped through high school."
"Actually…" Reeve glanced at me, I quickly shook my head. Don't do it, Reeve.
"Actually, what?" Aerith blew a lock of hair out of her face, looking between us suspiciously. "What, Reeve?"
"He, uh…" Reeve scratched the back of his head. I closed my eyes. "He got into C.D.S.U.. I was tutoring him for a while. It sounded like he got his grades up enough to sneak in. His S.A.T. and A.C.T. scores were impressive. They gave him preferred walk-on status for the football team…"
"Reno," Aerith said simply. I nodded, feeling a sinking pit in my stomach. "Chain smoking, drug dealing, alcoholic Reno got into college, and I didn't."
Reeve was silent, once again taking interest in his shoelaces. I glanced off at the scoreboard, dark and silent in the summer afternoon.
"I'm going to go," she muttered, getting to her feet and brushing the rubber bits off of her. "Cloud, I'll… I'll call you later."
She strode off, heading toward the parking lot.
"Aerith!" I called, voice echoing off of the deserted bleachers.
She didn't turn around.
The drive home was rather uneventful. By the time Reeve and I had finished our workout, which included running routes and passing and catching, the sun was beginning to go down. I flipped the visor down, blocking the trailing rays of the sun. The vest rattled around the bed of my '97 Toyota Tacoma, more so when I shifted to a higher gear as I cruised onto the freeway.
Without looking, I adjusted the volume of the radio, driving with my knees for a moment as I slid on a pair of gas station aviators.
"-unsel. I can't believe there are people in this town who believe John Kunsel is a better quarterback than Cloud Strife."
"Jesus, do you guys ever go home?" I muttered, shooting a glance at the radio.
"People expect results. And Strife was 1-2 in games last year, and he overthrew the final pass that lost the game in the playoffs. Yes, he was hit when he threw, but in this town, people think of that as an excuse. And the one thing Nibelheim doesn't accept are excuses. Especially when it comes to the Dragons. And last year felt like one big excuse."
"Even with the death of Zack Fair and Safer Sephiroth dropping out and then transferring?"
"Even with those, yes."
"Well, it's not like anyone is expecting a whole lot from this year's Dragons. All of the publications and major news sites have listed us as one of the bottom feeders in the division, no national or state ranking, and no one listed as a pre-season All-State, hell, even an All-Conference."
"Well, hopefully we can shake things up this year."
"Not very likely, Jimbo."
My blinker was flicked on, as I checked over my shoulder, shifting into neutral and drifting across the lanes and up the exit ramp toward Junon.
Aerith didn't call me.
I didn't pay it any mind, at first, instead continuing to prepare my mind and body for the football season.
And school, too, I guess.
It was the final summer day before practice began, and so I took a break from my workouts and ended up at the edge of the river with none other than Yuffie Kisargi.
She lounged on a beach towel, big sunglasses on, iPod plugged into her ears. Her skimpy yellow bikini left little to the imagination, but I was immune to the charm. She had propositioned me a few times, but I had no plans to sleep with her. None at all.
Honest.
I finished my beer, tossing it over my shoulder and settling my hand back on my fishing pole. The silence was broken by Yuffie popping her gum loudly and the clicking of my reel.
The water was calm, and the sun beat down from the cloudless sky. I sat on a large rock, shirt off, mostly in the shade of an old tree that stood resolute on the shoreline.
"You're looking big, Spikes."
I glanced to my left, seeing Yuffie sitting up and looking at me.
"Really?"
"Shit yeah, bro," she said, dropping her headphones on her towel and wading out in the water. "You been listening to the radio and them 'good ol' boys' talk show?"
"Not really," I lied.
"Well, they kept saying how your scrawny, Spiky ass is going to get broke this year," she said, skipping a rock across the water. I glanced at her, eyebrow raised. She didn't get the message. "But now, look at you, you're a regular buff muffin."
"Well, I have been working pretty hard…" I said, feeling a tug on my fishing pole. I grabbed it, reeling it in quickly, as Yuffie skipped another rock over the water.
Instantly, the pressure alleviated, and I sighed.
"Yuffie…"
"Oh, grow up. It wasn't like you were gonna catch it anyway," she said, watching a speedboat with a huge wakeboard rack come cruising by, pausing in the middle of the river in front of us. A group of drunken guys, stood up on the edge, and I instantly recognized a few of them from the Kalm football team.
"Show us your tits!"
They roared with laughter, high fiving each other as Yuffie smiled sweetly, reaching back as if to untie her swimsuit.
She whipped her hands forward, two middle fingers raised in retort.
"Go fuck yourselves ya' fuckin' wankers!" she yelled, blowing a raspberry at the boat.
The guys instantly quieted down for a moment, before the group started laughing at the guy who yelled, who slumped back into his seat, sulking. The boat sped off, leaving a huge wake in its trail.
I sighed, bringing in my line. No fishing would be done today. The cooler next to me had three beers left on ice; I grabbed one and popped it open.
"Nice British accent," I said.
"The British are on a whole 'nother level of swearing," she said, leaving the water and sitting back down on her towel. "I feel like I need to respond at the height of my game whenever someone asks to see my boobs."
I shook my head, smiling, and took a gulp of my beer.
"Well, except you of course."
"No thanks, I'm good."
"The offer is always on the table, Spikes," she looked at me, her voice taking on a sultry tone. "One of these days, you're gonna give into the Asian Persuasion and give me some of that nice, meaty, homegrown Nibelheim sausage."
I spit my beer out over the water, coughing loudly as Yuffie laughed.
"You're so easy to make uncomfortable," she grinned as I wiped my chin. "How's your girl friend?"
"Aerith ain't my girlfriend," I responded. "And I haven't talked to her in a week or so."
"I said girl friend. Girl-space-friend. And I wasn't talking about her."
Tifa. Of course she had to ask me about Tifa. She witnessed the crumbling of our friendship firsthand, and every once in a while she would just bring it up out of the blue.
This was one of those once in a whiles.
And I knew exactly how to respond to that.
"Don't you dare clam up on me," Yuffie warned, pointing at me. Can she read minds? "You need to talk to me about this."
"Why?"
"Because it's not healthy to let it build up within you," she said, taking her sunglasses off. She was dead serious, staring me in the eye. "And I'm the only person that gives enough of a rat's ass to let you vent your feelings to me."
I sat silently, staring at the ground.
"You're a good friend," I said softly, still staring at the ground. "Those have been few and far between since the accident."
"Yeah, well, remember that when you're rich and famous and I'm homeless and blowing some dude for a Happy Meal."
"I'll be sure to toss you a rich, British guy who can teach you how to swear," I laughed.
"Cloud, you can tell me to shove my opinion up where the sun don't shine, but I think you should go talk to her."
Water lapped against the shore, as I put together my next response.
"Why?"
Good one, Cloud. Glad you thought that out.
"Well, first off, you still feel guilty about calling her a See-You-Next-Tuesday, even though she might have deserved it," Yuffie put her sunglasses on. "And numero dos-o, your mind instantly hopped to her once I said girlfriend."
"I thought you said girl-space-friend. And my mind jumped right to Aerith."
"That's what you keep telling yourself because that's what other people think."
Was she right? Was my thought about Aerith a conditioned response because of how much we hung out? Because of how I wanted to hide away the idea that I still have serious romantic feelings for Tifa?
"Shit…" I muttered, running a hand through my hair. "You have to be a mind reader."
"I just know you too well, Spikes."
I pulled my truck into a parking spot in front of Seventh Heaven, the new tavern nestled between the hardware store and the drugstore on Main Street. The lone stoplight in town continued to blink yellow. Down the street was the Tasty Freeze, few cars parked around it. I got out of my truck, still wearing my board shorts and a cutoff t-shirt. Yuffie lounged in the passenger's seat, playing a game on her phone.
"I'll be back," I said, closing the door. "Make sure no one takes my fishing pole."
"Yeah, hella people in Nibelheim are gonna want another fishing pole," she responded, not looking up.
The sign on the door read 'Minors Welcome until 9 p.m.'. I took a deep breath, before pulling open the heavy wooden door and stepping inside.
The bar was dark, and was sparsely decorated. Featureless wooden tables and chairs took up nearly the entire floor. The bar, which was installed when this place was the Wild Chocobo Tavern, was stained and chipped and added character. A large TV hung behind the bar, currently on with the news channel. An old, busted pinball machine sat next to an even older jukebox, country music leaking out of the speakers.
It was nearly empty, it was early afternoon on a Sunday after all, but an elderly couple was huddled at a small table near the door, and four middle aged men sat around a round table in the center of the room.
And she was there too.
Her back was to me, as she stacked beer bottles and cans into the standing fridge behind the bar.
I swallowed. Okay, Cloud, you can do this…
I walked past the group of men, and a flash of realization passed over all of their faces.
"Cloud Strife?" one of them asked, and I recognized the voice immediately. Shit, these guys were the dudes from the radio. Tifa stiffened when she heard my name.
"Cloud, can we talk to you for a moment?"
"Maybe later," I said, waving them off, approaching Tifa. She continued to stand with her back to me.
Another deep breath.
"Tifa."
She made no sign that she heard me, instead turning around and grabbing a bin from underneath the bar. She walked out into the dining area.
"Tifa," I repeated, following her as she cleaned off one of the empty messy tables. "Tifa, can I talk to you?"
"I'm at work right now, Cloud," she said sharply. "I can't talk to you."
"It'll take five minutes, tops."
"If you're not a customer, I can't talk."
An idea popped into my head.
"Alright then," I said, pulling a chair out from under the table she was cleaning, and sitting down heavily. Tifa blew a lock of hair out of her face, turning her gaze toward me.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm now a customer."
She stared at me for a moment, no emotion on her face. Then…
"I'll get someone to serve you, sir," she said, walking away.
"Tifa, wait," I stood up. "I'm sorry."
She paused in front of the bar.
"Look, I was a colossal asshole to you. And I know sorry isn't good enough to cut it, but I really, truly am," I said, taking a few steps toward her. "Look, I'm not here to try to win you back or anything, I just wanted to tell you that I was sorry, and that I hope we can be friends again. Because, goddammit, Tifa, you are too important a person in my life to lose."
We stood in silence, as the radio people and the elderly couple looked on.
Tifa sniffled once, breaking the silence.
"You were a douche bag," she said with a short laugh, turning around and wiping her eyes.
"Yeah," I muttered, scratching the back of my head. "I guess I was…"
We both started laughing, and I looked up into her eyes. She was smiling. For the first time in months, that radiant smile was directed at me.
I felt a pang in my heart.
"Cloud," she said, smile faltering. "It's just not that easy. I'm going to need time, we can't just pick up and start over, you know?"
"Yeah, yeah I know," I lied. Of course we totally could. "But I just wanted you to know, Tifa, that I'm here. Whenever you're ready."
"Thanks, Cloud," she smiled again. "This was… very mature, of you."
The back door opened, and Tifa's Dad walked in, arms full of boxes.
"Tifa, can you help me out here?" he asked. She turned to me.
"I… have to get back to work," she said, gesturing toward her Dad.
"Yeah, yeah, no problem. I'll get out of your hair," I said, turning and walking toward the door.
"Cloud."
"What's up?"
"I…" she paused, looking at the floor. "It was good to talk to you again."
"… You too."
I pushed the door open, taking a deep breath as I climbed into my truck. Yuffie was still on her phone.
"How'd it go?"
I didn't respond at first, starting my truck and backing out onto Main Street.
A car came screeching in next to me, causing me to pause and look out the window. Aerith's Mom, got out of the car. I manually rolled my window down.
"Hey, Mrs. Gainsborough," I greeted. "What's up?"
"Cloud! Is Aerith with you?"
A cold feeling gripped my stomach.
"No. I haven't seen her in a week or so. Why, what's wrong?"
"She just left without telling me where she was going. I was checking to see if Tifa knew," she said frantically.
"I think I know where she is," I said. "I'll get her home."
I eased my truck to a stop outside of the graveyard. The sun had, for the most part, gone down, casting eerie shadows across the graveyard. I walked forward, grass crunching under my feet.
Aerith sat in front of Zack's gravestone, phone to her ear, as she cried softly.
She pulled her phone down, hit the redial button, and put it back up to her ear. She snapped it shut after a few moments.
"You okay?" I asked softly.
Instead of responding, she simply opened her phone again, turned on speaker phone, and hit redial. The electronic beeping of keys being punched in filled the cold silence. A single ring echoed around the graveyard. My breath caught as I heard the voice.
"Hey, this is Zack! I'm either playing football or completely hammered, so leave me a message and I'll get back to you! Later!"
Beep.
She snapped her phone shut.
I hadn't heard Zack's voice since the night he died. To have that sprung up on me…
The snap of Aerith's phone closing jarred me out of my memories. She hit redial again.
"Stop," I said.
"Hey, this is Zack! I'm either playing football or completely hammered, so-"
"Aerith, stop!" my voice was forceful, taking the phone and closing it. Only then did she turn toward me. "Stop. Just… stop."
"You still think you're the only one who can grieve, Cloud?" her eyes blazed fury. "It's been almost a year since he died. This is the only way I can hear his voice anymore."
"This isn't grieving," I said, setting her phone on Zack's tombstone. "You're torturing yourself."
"So now you're forgetting about him, too?"
"How could you say that?"
"Look at you," she said vehemently. "Prancing around as the new QB1, forgetting about who was there before you. It doesn't even seem like you miss him anymore."
Has she lost her mind? What the hell was Aerith talking about? She had never spoken to anyone like this… with so much hate and anger. Especially to me. Did she want me to become like her? A bitter, depressed individual who lashed out at those closest to them?
And then I realized, that's exactly what I had become after Zack's death. What I did to Tifa.
"I'm not being dragged back into that cocoon of pain and loneliness again," I told her. "I did that once before, and it was the darkest, most trying time in my life. And I never want to do it again. Zack is, and always will be, my best friend. I will never forget him, just like I will never forget the fact that he died because of me. But I'm not going to let that rule my life. I am my own person, damn it."
Aerith was silent for a long time.
"I'm going away tomorrow," she finally spoke. "To live with my cousin in Midgar for a little bit. Haven't ever been to that city…"
She looked up at me.
"… Not sure when I'm coming back."
I swallowed, looking away. I knew what she meant. Aerith was never coming back to Nibelheim.
"Alright, well, take care of yourself," I said, looking aside. "Maybe I'll see you later."
"Maybe."
Aerith was gone. No phone call, no stopping by and saying goodbye. Her phone revealed that it was disconnected. Poor girl, I guess starting over would probably be best for her.
Practice started, and then a few weeks later, school reared its ugly head once more. Coach was much tamer this year, since the majority of his team had either graduated or left, he knew this would be a terrible season. All of the receivers had little to no experience, with Ricky and Steve having graduated, Sephiroth transferring to QB at Modeoheim. The only receiver coming back who had a touchdown last year was Reeve, and he only had one.
I was ready, however, and attacked the fall camp without hesitation. Yuffie was right. I was much stronger and faster than I was last year. Even better, I was thicker, which made me much more durable. I had a feeling I would be getting hit a lot this year. The competition between Kunsel and I was incredibly one sided. Kunsel was good, but the way he was torn apart last year left him with little confidence. He'd get his shot next year, as the coaching staff unanimously named me the starting quarterback.
Of course, not everything is sunshine and rainbows, the 30 minute commute to school sucked. But I could deal with that.
TIfa continued to date Vincent, however our friendship had definitely recovered. We began to hang out again, tentatively and infrequently at first, but it continued to grow. All of my friends had graduated and that left my circle of friends to the bare minimum. Elena was still here, but we rarely talked, and Reeve was quickly becoming the closest friend I had. Tifa had rejoined our circle as well.
Reno and Rude both went to school at C.D.S.U. and left around the same time. Rude got the full ride and revealed that the coaches said he would probably be tagged with a red shirt and sit out his freshman year. Reno was still unsure if he wanted to play football or just party his life away.
"It'll be a game time decision," he told me as he smoked a blunt, drank a beer and had a dip in all at the same time.
Rufus started working at the Shinra Oil Corporation full time, acting as a member of the administrative staff to start. At least his dad didn't make him Vice President right off the bat.
And Sephiroth. I was still trying to figure that one out. I know he has another year of eligibility left in high school athletics, since he dropped out before the cutoff date. His transfer to Modeoheim, however, was puzzling. It was no secret that he wanted to play quarterback, but his freak athleticism allowed him to exceed at any position on the field, specifically wide receiver. So, he transferred to Modeoheim to play quarterback, but why didn't he just come back to Nibelheim? Did he not think he could beat me in an open competition?
Before I knew it, it was the first Friday of the year, and I found myself sitting in front of my locker wondering where the hell the last two months went. Yuffie was wearing my away jersey today, as I tugged on the dominating black and red home jersey of the Nibelheim Dragons. I brushed off the '1' patch on the left collarbone.
QB wrist onto my left one, two red sweat bands onto my right wrist, two swipes of eye black under my eyes. I grabbed my helmet. I was ready for war.
Time flowed strangely for me, I don't remember the talk we had before the game in the locker room, I all of a sudden was in the tunnel, waiting for my name to be called. Since this was the first game of the season, they would introduce each of the starters individually.
I hopped on the balls of my feet, helmet on but unstrapped, as I waited. Like all quarterbacks, I would be announced last, to get the full respect from the crowd.
I knew I should be nervous, hell, I hadn't played a real game of football since losing against Modeoheim. But I wasn't. I was calm, ready for battle. Alone in the tunnel, waiting for my turn, I felt more at peace than I had in the longest time. I grabbed the collar of my pads, stretching my neck.
The announcer's voice boomed over the field. Go time. I took a deep breath, held it, and jogged out of the tunnel.
"Starting at quarterback, the six foot, one inch, two hundred pound senior, Cloud Strife!"
A/N (3/28/12): Hello my friends. It has been awhile. In my defense, my computer has been broken for about three weeks, and finally got a new one and pounded this out quickly. This chapter actually did not exist in the original outline, but jumping from middle of summer to the three games into Cloud's senior season left a few unanswered questions, so apologies if this chapter is all over the place.
I'm a bit torn. As you may know, overwhelming positive response to this story has made me begin to adapt this as a completely original, edited novel. I'm unsure if I should continue this version of the story as a preview, editing the chapters along the way, or just jump right into making it the original story, and leave these chapters up as a preview. Any input in PMs or Reviews would be fantastic.
Also, be sure to check out my author bio page (or whatever it's called) for my blog! FAQs / hate mail / updates will be posted up there whenever I feel like it!
Enjoy Chapter 11!
~R0g3r