Asuka opened her eyes again and looked at the clock. It said 3:30 PM. She yawned. She had been up all night with Rei while reading to her. She looked around and realized that she was on the couch and sitting instead of lying down. She looked to the side and saw Rei sleeping with her head on Asuka's shoulder. It was then she realized that she had fallen asleep with her arms still wrapped around Rei. Rei also had her arms wrapped around Asuka's waist.
'Maybe if I move slowly away she'll...' Asuka thought as she tried to slide away from Rei and out of her grasp. Rei's grip only tightened and Asuka eased back. 'I guess not. You know she really is kind of cute right now.'
Asuka waited and watched the clock. She didn't want anyone to come in and see them like this. They might get the wrong idea. She had to admit if she had found Shinji like this with Rei she wouldn't have listened to explanations she would have just thrown Shinji out of the window and asked questions later.
Asuka looked at Rei again and sighed. It didn't look like she was going anywhere anytime soon. "Rei." She asked. Rei groaned and wiggled a little. "Rei could you please let go. We've been asleep for nine hours."
Rei's eyes opened as she looked blearily at Asuka. Then she reluctantly let go and sat up. Then she rubbed her eyes and looked around for a few minutes getting her bearings. Then she froze as she remembered what had just happened. Not the attack last night but what she had said to Asuka and how she had responded. "I'm sorry."
"What are you sorry for?" Asuka asked. "You don't need to be sorry about anything." She looked as Rei shook her head and got up from the couch.
"I'm sorry for laying my troubles upon you." Rei said. "It wasn't my place or purpose. I am sorry." She got up and walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water.
"Oh." Asuka said. "Don't worry about that. I didn't mind at all." Actually the situation had frightened her half to death but she was so glad to have Rei acting normally again it didn't matter. "So how do you feel about what happened...while you were coming home last night."
"It was...painful." Rei said as she walked back in with two glasses of water. "But no permanent physical damage has been done."
"And what about psychological." Asuka asked. As she accepted the glass of water Rei held out to her. "Thanks. Now as to my question."
"Nothing that cannot be fixed." Rei said blankly. Rei seemed to not really want to talk about what had happened but Asuka knew it needed to be discussed.
"You're lying to me." Asuka said. "You might look blank a lot of the time but you're still readable once someone gets to know you and I know you well enough to know when you are lying to me. You trusted me last night. Please trust me now."
Rei looked at Asuka as if gauging what her reaction would be to what she was going to tell her and then she spoke. "You all say that this sexual assault was a horrible thing. I agree, it was painful and degrading in may ways but that wasn't what I was...terrified of last night. Even with the pain and the humiliation the attack was preferable to what happened afterward. After they were finished with me they left me in the cold alone. That was what truly scared me. I was hurt and alone with no one to help me and no chance that I would ever be with anyone again. I would remain in the cold alone. That was my nightmare. That was what truly scared me. Not what they did to me during the attack but what they did after. The...act they performed using me was one of the worst moments of my entire life but when they left me...that was worse."
Asuka nodded. It made sense to her. It made a kind of sick and perverted sense but it made sense as to why Rei had always been the way she was. She was always terrified. In her mind even being in pain or having the most horrible things done to her was better than being alone. Asuka felt like she could kick herself. When she had first met Rei she had thought that all the girl had wanted was to be alone. But instead the girl had wanted the exact opposite. The girl wanted to be with someone but didn't know how to make her wants known. Asuka felt guilty. For much of their relationship before now she had done the worst thing she could have to Rei. She had left her alone. Like these people had done.
The glass in Asuka's hand shattered as she squeezed it tightly. Whoever had done this was going to pay. Not just in pain. Pain wasn't enough for Asuka now. She wanted them to pay with more than that. They had used her best friend for their own perverse amusement and took her innocence forcibly from her. That alone in Asuka's mind was a killing offense. But then they had placed Rei in the worst position they possibly could. They left her alone in a condition that meant she wouldn't be able to get to help and other people. They had left Rei alone, the worst thing they could possibly do to her. Asuka wanted to kill whoever had caused this.
Asuka's was shaken out of her rage when she felt a cold washcloth on her hand. She blinked and then looked at Rei who was busy cleaning the cuts that had been made by the broken glass, any of the glass that had stayed in the hand was gently pulled out by Rei. Asuka wanted to cry. No matter what had happened to Rei she was still the same sweet girl she had known. She only wished now that she had treated her better than she had. But it appeared she had been forgiven. Though she would never admit it even to herself she thought she didn't deserve Rei's kindness or forgiveness.
"Rei please tell me." Asuka said softly. "Tell me who did such a terrible thing to you. I promise I won't let them get away with it."
Rei looked up at her as she picked the rest of the glass up from the floor and then walked it over to the trashcan to throw it away. "I don't..." Rei wanted so badly to tell her who had done so but she also remembered what Kagura had said after they were finished with her. "If you ever tell anyone about who did this to you I'll make sure we have our fun with Asuka instead and maybe I'll let you watch." Kagura's words echoed through her head and Rei sighed. No matter what happened she wouldn't let that happen to Asuka. It had been one of the worst experiences in her life and she wouldn't allow it to happen to Asuka. "I don't remember who the people were."
"People?" Asuka asked. "So you mean there were more than one. But then again I've seen you fight before so I guess it would have to mean more than one. If you can't remember I'll have to ask around and find out for myself. Don't worry I'll get them." Rei worried.
There was a knock on the door and before Asuka could get up to open the door it opened and Shinji, Touji, Kensuke, and Hikari paraded inside and closed the door behind them. "What makes all of you look so happy?" Asuka yelled at them.
They all exchanged looks. "We got him." It took Asuka a few moments to understand what they meant then slowly stood up.
"Repeat what you just said please with details." Asuka asked them. She wasn't smiling but she wasn't frowning. She had a very good impression of Rei's blank look.
"Well we found the boy who did it." Hikari said. "After we found out I lured him into the janitors room with what I called my own congratulations. What he didn't realize until he was in the janitors room was that Touji, Kensuke and... even Shinji had their own congratulations to give!"
"So you found one of them." Asuka said slowly and the smiles on their lips disappeared. "Yes I mean you've only found one. Rei's been able to tell me that there were more than one involved in her attack. But she can't remember who the people were. But since you've got one already..." Asuka said and a grin slowly appeared on her face. "I guess you've just made my job a lot easier." And then she did something they hadn't seen her do before. Asuka put her hands together and clapped while she smiled at them.
Then there was another knock on the door and within the next few seconds Misato came bursting into the room looking livid. "All right now tell me what's going on!" She yelled. "First I get a call telling me Rei's been attacked and now I get told that you boys put another boy in the hospital. Care to explain to me what happened?"
There was an immediate uproar but it silenced just as quickly as it started when Shinji stepped forward. "I take responsibility for that Misato. It was my fault. And you know what. I'd do it again in a heartbeat." Shinji smiled and looked up at Misato. He didn't look at all guilty or afraid. "That boy was one of the people who attacked Rei. He got what he deserved. You can punish me as you see fit."
Misato stared at him; her eyes blazing like fires. "All right you asked for you're punishment so here it is." Then in an instant she was hugging him in front of everyone and the livid expression on her face was replaced by one of genuine merriment. "Good job Shinji." Everyone in the room except for Rei fell over in shock. "I'd have done the exact same thing. It looks like you're not completely hopeless after all." She let him go and walked over to Rei. "How are you feeling?"
"I am doing..." Rei looked at Asuka and smiled. "I am doing better. Thank you for asking." Touji, Kensuke, and Hikari had nearly recovered from Misato now fell over again at seeing Rei smile. Misato and Shinji weren't surprised. They had both talked about leaving Asuka with Rei and had both decided it would be the best idea. She seemed to be the closest to Rei at the moment and if anyone could make her feel better it would he her. It looked like their bet paid off.
"All right." Misato said. "I was ordered by Commander Ikari to chew you out for your attack on this boy but I think something else should be done instead. Shinji you cook the best dinner you can. Tell me what to go get at the grocery store and I'll go get it. I don't care if it's steak." Everyone else in the room mimicked Rei's smile but none of them could have out shone it. She was truly touched that these people had all been worried about her.
-
Asuka sat by Rei at lunch the next day and was already talking to Rei as if nothing had happened. But Rei really didn't mind. She was pleased that things were now going back to the way they were before and should be. Rei listened but didn't reply as Asuka ranted on about her latest failed date in, which this time she had dumped the boy due to a bad case of acne. Rei had lost count just how many boys Asuka had dated and dumped a long time ago.
As she ate her sandwich her gaze settled on Kagura who was sitting a few benches down talking just as animatedly as Asuka was now. She had a smile on that was betrayed by her eyes like always. She then noticed Asuka had stopped talking at was staring at her quizzically. "Rei what are you staring at?" Rei looked away from Kagura and didn't answer.
Asuka looked from Rei to the place where she had been looking and noticed Kagura along with two of her friends. It was as if something clicking inside her mind. She remembered Shinji saying that Kagura had threatened him and Rei when he refused to help her with something. She also remembered the time Rei said that a girl at school had said that Asuka didn't want to be Rei's friend because it would hurt her image in the eyes of her peers and last of all she remembered the name of the boy Shinji had told her was behind the attack. Hiro was Kagura's boyfriend and he had to be the dumbest boy in school, even worse than Touji if that was possible. He wasn't smart enough to do anything on his own and Rei had mentioned there being others involved. Everything now seemed to fall into place. "Rei." Asuka asked. "What was the girl's name who told you our friendship was hurting me?"
"A girl with black hair and black eyes." Rei said. "Her name is Kagura Konouchi. Why do you..." Rei noticed where Asuka was staring and she noticed the expression on Asuka's face. It hit her now from the expression on Asuka's face she had figured it out.
Asuka didn't speak. She just stood up and walked over to the bench Kagura was at. Kagura immediately looked up and gave her cutest smile to Asuka. "How are you doing?"
"May we talk in private?" Asuka said with a smile that so resembled the one she used most of the time she was around her friends.
"Of course." Kagura said as she followed Asuka around the school building and away from the others. Rei knew that trouble was about to occur. She put her sandwich back into the lunch bag and followed far being Asuka and Kagura as they walked around the building. Once the two were around the building Kagura turned and looked at Asuka. "So what did you want to talk to me about dear friend..." She wasn't able to finish her sentence before Asuka had her hands around Kagura's throat and was pushing her towards the wall of the school building. Kagura's eyes darted around and she immediately realized her mistake. There wasn't anybody around. She was on her own with Asuka and she had a fairly good idea why Asuka was so pissed at her.
"Shut up!" Asuka said coldly as Kagura felt her back press up against the wall. "How dare you call yourself my friend you would do such a terrible thing to Rei. You hurt her more deeply than you know and now I hurt you!" Kagura felt her feet lift off of the ground slowly.
Kagura tried to speak but found that air couldn't get past her throat to speak. She tried to take a breath and realized it was completely cut off. She grabbed Asuka's hands and tried her best to pry them away from her throat. They seemed locking place however and her struggles didn't even faze her. Kagura hooker her fingers around Asuka's wrists and pulled as hard as she could. Asuka just shook her violently causing her head to hit the wall hard. Asuka's grip still didn't weaken.
Kagura started trying to lash out with her legs but due to her lack of oxygen there was very little luster in her attacks. The ones that connected caused Asuka to grunt but didn't make her let go. Kagura started kicking harder and struggles while she tried to pry Asuka's hands away. Asuka's expression didn't change; it was one of pure cold fury. Kagura flailed violently with both legs and struck Asuka in the abdomen several times and even hit her knees with a few. But Asuka didn't waver.
"Do you think I won't kill you?" Asuka asked in a chilly voice. "Do you really thing I wouldn't do it. I don't care about the consequences of murder. I've killed before in my Eva battles with the angels just by falling the wrong way. Do you think I will feel any guilt by killing you? You hurt the only person who has shown me nothing but kindness. You little bitch. When you die I want you to remember something. Remember exactly what you did to her."
Kagura believed every word Asuka said. Her kicks were becoming weak now. Kagura reached toward Asuka and her fingers brushed weakly against Asuka's shirt collar. "Don't touch me." Asuka said as she shook Kagura again. Kagura felt her world shake around her and was beginning to feel faint.
Asuka then felt a hand on her shoulder. "Let her go Asuka." A voice said. Asuka turned her head but didn't let go of Kagura. Instead her grip tightened with what she saw. Rei was standing there with her hand on Asuka's shoulder.
"Why should I let her go after what she did to you?" Asuka said a little bit less coldly than she had been to Kagura. Her eyes were still hard with her fury.
"It isn't worth it." Rei said. "She has hurt me but not irreparably. What you are doing will get you into trouble. You could be put away for life or even executed for murder. It isn't worth that. I'm not worth that. What ever she has done to me she doesn't deserve to die for it. Even one as hateful as she is does not deserve death for that. Please let her go."
Asuka looked back to Kagura and saw the life beginning to fade from her eyes. Then an image hit her. It was the image of Rei trembling after she had just remembered what had happened to her. Her eyes looked exactly like Kagura's did now. Asuka turned back to look at Rei and her eyes softened. "You are the only one who has the right to decide that Rei." She said. "You do know she doesn't deserve your kindness...your mercy."
"All the same." Rei said. "She doesn't deserve to die and I don't want you to get into trouble on my account. Please let her go."
Asuka sighed and let go of Kagura who dropped to the ground and landed on her rump with a high-pitched yelp. "All right Rei. I won't kill her today." Asuka then leaned down and looked at Kagura on the ground. Then she reached down and grasped Kagura's hair and pulled her face up to look at her. "Now you listen to me Kagura. You only live on because Rei Ayanami asked me to spare your life. She showed you kindness no one else would. Thank her." Kagura didn't speak. "I said thank her!" Asuka shook Kagura by her hair.
"Thank you miss Ayanami." Kagura said in a voice that sounded defeated instead of her usual sickeningly sweet tone she always used.
Asuka then pulled Kagura's face back to look at her. "Now you listen to me. Consider this a stay of execution. If you ever do anything to her again I will kill you. Do you here me? I will kill you." Then Asuka pushed Kagura down as hard as she could and Kagura's head hit the ground and she started sobbing. She didn't say anything as Asuka and Rei walked off. She doubted even the dumbest person she knew would have called Asuka's threat.
Rei followed a few steps behind Asuka as they walked back towards Misato's apartment from school. Asuka hadn't spoken a word since her fight with Kagura. Rei was beginning to worry about whether or not Asuka was mad at her. Really she wouldn't be surprised if Asuka was. The red head had always been one to let her temper get the better of her. But then that was always the way she had been.
They were about halfway when Asuka finally spoke. "Rei I wanted to ask you something." Rei stared curiously at Asuka as she walked along side her and nodded her head where Asuka could see it. "I wanted to ask you why you said you weren't worth it when I was attacking Kagura for what she did to you."
"Because I am not worth it." Rei said as she looked away from Asuka. Asuka however stared at Rei and waited for another answer.
When Rei didn't speak again Asuka asked her again, "Why did you say you weren't worth it? Tell me why you would say such a thing about yourself."
"I said such a thing about myself because it is true." Rei Ayanami said with a sigh. "Everyone knows it. I have no value and I never have. Without my purpose I am without value and without use. As long as I am not trying to accomplish my purpose, which I wasn't when it happened. I deserve what ever happens to me. I'm not worth anything Asuka. You should know that by now."
"Shut up." Asuka said simply. "I'll tell you something Rei. There are some things I don't mind hearing and there are other things that drive me up a wall do you hear me. One of the things that makes me truly angry is to hear you call yourself worthless. Don't ever let me hear you call yourself worthless and say you have no value. Don't you ever say you only exist for your purpose, you exist for far more than that do you understand me Rei Ayanami?"
"Yes I understand you Asuka." Rei said as she walked alongside the German girl. "And Asuka..." Rei said after a few moments. Asuka looked at her to see Rei nod her head into a little bow. "Thank you."
Kagura walked down the road towards her apartment fuming. She was furious, no she was worse than that. She was pissed. She couldn't believe that her friend had attacked her. And for what? She had been beaten up because of the school weirdo.
Kagura couldn't believe that Asuka had made her thank Rei. 'Kindness and mercy don't exist.' She thought to herself. 'They are just tools to manipulate the weak and foolish and it appears to me that Rei and Asuka are both foolish.' She rubbed the bruises on her neck and winced. Asuka did indeed have a strong grip. A badly written line from many B action movies she had seen before came to mind that was none the less apt. "This isn't over yet." Kagura said as she repeated the line to herself. "This isn't over by a long shot."