Harry Potter Year 4: Voldermort Returns
Chapter 10
Later that night after visiting the Hospital Wing (he trusted Madam Pomfrey not to tell anyone due to the Healers Code of Conduct which prevented her from sharing any private information without consent) Harry settled himself down by the lake, hoping for some peace to gather his thoughts.
Madam Pomfrey had offered to find some sort of therapist for Harry, but he had politely refused. If he was finding it hard to talk to Sirius and Remus, it would be completely impossible for him to open up to a stranger, despite claims that 'talking to someone with an un-biased point of view' could help.
There was also the unexpected loss of two of Harry's closest friends. Losing Ron had been bad enough, but Harry had now lost his three best friends from Gryffindor. Sure, he had Cho, Cedric, Viktor and Fleur, but they weren't in his classes and they couldn't hang around with him in the Gryffindor common room after curfew. They certainly couldn't help him do research for the Second Task; they had their own work to do and Cho was staying out of it due to being so close to both Harry and Cedric.
On top of that was the simple fact that Sirius and Remus knew about one of Harry's darkest secrets; the one he'd hoped no-one would ever find out. It almost felt good, in a twisted way, to know that he could talk to someone about it now… at the same time, though, he couldn't help but feel angry at Hermione and Ginny for taking his one guaranteed-to-work method of coping with his emotions. Serve them right, then, if I start snapping at people out of nowhere. Trying to find some way to vent his frustrations without destroying his newly-healed knuckles, Harry started picking up random stoned off the ground and throwing them as hard as possible into the lake, trying to focus on the ripples that flowed outwards.
"You weren't in classes today," a soft voice made Harry jump.
"No, I wasn't," Harry agreed, glancing at Cho before returning to his task of throwing stones into the lake.
"Mind if I join?"
"Go ahead." Cho moved to sit beside Harry, copying him and throwing rocks – though not with quite so much force – into the lake.
"Did you argue with Hermione and Ginny?"
"What makes you say that?" Harry asked, his jaw clenching.
"Rumours," Cho said softly. "Secrets don't stay secrets for long." Harry had to smile a little at that phrase, one which he himself had used umpteen times.
"I did," Harry said slowly, forcing his jaw to relax.
"Are you… are you still talking to them?"
"No." Harry said a little harsher than he'd meant to.
"I'm sorry," Cho said in a soft voice. "That's you not talking to Ron, Hermione or Ginny… that's the worst luck."
"I'm glad, actually," Harry said darkly. "I'd rather learn their true colours now than when we've been best friends for 10, 20 years."
"It's really that bad?"
"Gee, I don't know," Harry said sarcastically. "Is having two of your closest friends invade your privacy and completely betray you 'really that bad'? Is having a friend who's too jealous to think about anyone else 'really that bad'? Is knowing that your guardians are going to be constantly on your case in-case you – do something that they term as wrong 'really that bad'? Is being entered into a bloody Tournament that's ruling your life 'really that bad'? Is getting the occasional unwanted visits to Voldemorts' mind, which hurts like shit, by the way, 'really that bad'? Is - " Harry broke off, his hand trembling. Cho was looking at him with wide eyes, having never heard him rant like that before. "Look, I'm sorry, alright?" Harry asked, rubbing the back of his neck tiredly. "I just… I have a lot on my mind right now. It's probably a better idea to steer clear of anything involving my so-called friends."
"You should talk to someone, Harry," Cho told him, her soft voice full of concern. "It isn't healthy to bottle things like that up. Just the simple fact that you are ranting about it proves it's really getting to you."
"Talk to people," Harry rolled his eyes. "That's exactly what I've been told by Sirius, Remus and Pomfrey. Well, I've got news for you – talking isn't my thing. Bottling things up? That's what I'm used to. Now, I came out here to get peace, so if you'll excuse me," Harry said coolly, standing up and walking away from Cho. He knew he should feel guilty about snapping at Cho like that, especially when she only wanted to help, but somehow he couldn't find enough energy inside himself to feel bad. It's been a long day. He headed towards the rocks he'd been at last night, though he promised himself he wouldn't fall asleep this time
Harry sat down on the grass beside the rocks, wincing at the blood he could see stained onto the rock.
"Scourgify," he said softly, waving his wand at the rock to clean it before settling back to lean against it. He felt oddly empty after his rant to Cho; like he was too tired to feel emotion. Gradually, as he sat there staring ahead at nothing, one emotion returned to him: guilt. Cho only wanted to help and I went and lost my head with her. He knew he had to apologise to Cho – one of his few friends left – but he couldn't seem to find the energy. I'll apologise to her first chance I get tomorrow. Harry stood up dejectedly with a sigh, forcing himself to move towards the library despite wanting nothing more than to curl up in bed and sleep for a week. I'll just grab a quick book and head back to stay with Sirius and Remus tonight – I can't face having to see Hermione or Ginny tonight.
After selecting a book on transfiguration Harry slowly made the long trek over to the Marauder Quarters, desperate to relax and let himself become focused on the task of reading.
"Are you staying here tonight?" Sirius asked as Harry entered and plopped himself down on the usual sofa.
"Yeah," Harry said, rubbing his eyes. "I'd rather not run into Hermione or Ginny tonight thanks."
"Anything we can help you with?" Remus asked, noticing Harry's strained tone.
"Not unless you can break your word to Dumbledore," Harry muttered darkly, flipping the book open. Sirius and Remus glanced at each other.
"If you're really struggling we could - "
"Forget about it," Harry interrupted. "I've been in worse situations than this, I'll figure something out." Sirius and Remus were silent after that, sensing that Harry wasn't much in the mood to talk. It wasn't long until Harry headed off to bed, rather looking forward to feeling more energetic when he awoke.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
The next morning Harry woke up slightly later than usual, causing him to have to rush around in order to get to Transfiguration in time. It also meant he had to skip breakfast, which instantly ruined his 'I've-just-had-a-good-nights-sleep' mood. Sirius and Remus were both in bed, so Harry tried to keep the noise down as he packed his bag (asking Dobby to fetch the items in his dormitory up in Gryffindor tower) and dressed. Finally, with only five minutes to spare, Harry set off at a light jog for the classroom.
Despite jogging, Harry was still a couple of minutes late and was rather surprised when McGonagall didn't take points off of Gryffindor, instead giving him a somewhat concerned glance as she motioned for him to sit down.
"As I was saying," McGonagall continued her lesson as Harry took the empty seat beside Neville, "this is rather difficult compared to your previous tasks. Transfiguring a live object into an inanimate one is a very difficult, though very useful, thing to learn. Miss Patil, if you could?" One of the main fourth-year gossipers, Parvati Patil, collected the box of rabbits with a smile on her face as she cooed at them and handed them out.
"What've we to do?" Harry asked Neville in a low voice.
"Transfigure them into slippers," Neville explained, waving his wand over his rabbit, his face scrunched up in concentration.
"You need to flick your wand more at the end," Harry advised Neville before returning his attention to his own rabbit. Doing the wand movement described in the book, Harry murmured the incantation, "lepus ut taberus," smiling as the rabbit half-transfigured.
Somehow Harry ended up being one of the few who managed to completely transfigure their rabbit. Blinking at his own amazement, Harry hung back to walk to Herbology with Neville, trying to ignore the disappointed look on Hermione's face as she left with Ron.
However, just as he was about to leave McGonagall's voice called out, asking for a word. "Save me a spot," Harry told Neville, before turning to face McGonagall nervously.
"There is no need to be so anxious, Mr Potter," McGonagall told him with a rare smile. "I merely wanted to check whether or not you had a Ball partner yet."
"Err," Harry said, biting his lower lip. "I – I did… but I think I need to find a different one… Don't worry, Professor. I'll have someone on time."
Harry was distracted all the way through Herbology, his mind refusing to let go off the problem that was a Ball partner. When the bell rang for lunch he let out a tired sigh and trudged slowly back up to the castle on his own, not surprised when he ran into Malfoy. Giving the three Slytherins and irritated glare Harry cast a leglocker charm on them all before they even had the chance to attack and left them lying where they had fallen awkwardly onto the ground. Reaching the Great Hall, Harry glanced around before smiling slightly as he noticed Luna sitting with Cho at the Ravenclaw table. The two were in conversation, though it was obvious that Cho was trying hard not to laugh at whatever new belief Luna had just sprung on her.
"Mind if I sit?" Harry asked, wandering over to them.
"Sure," Cho said, sliding along to let Harry sit between the two girls. "Things not going too well with the Gryffindors?" she asked sympathetically.
"Well, there's that," Harry nodded, keeping his face neutral. "I also needed to ask you a favour, Luna," he said, turning to the blonde Ravenclaw from Ginny's year.
"Okay," Luna said, looking at Harry with an uncharacteristically serious face.
"Well," Harry started uncomfortably. "You know I need to open the Ball right? Well, the girl I was going with… I don't think I'll be going with her anymore. Don't take this the wrong way – I'm not just asking you because I can't go with her - "
"It's alright," Luna told him with a smile. "I understand. And you want to go with a friend, right? Someone who won't treat you like a trophy? I would be happy to go with you as friends."
"Seriously? Thanks, Luna!"
"Do you know who Fleur is going with?" Cho asked him curiously.
"Fleur?" Harry frowned, turning to face Cho now. "No… she hasn't mentioned the Ball all that much, actually. I'll ask her next time I see her."
And, as it so happened, Harry ran into Fleur right after dinner that night when he went out to clear his head, mentally preparing himself for yet more gruelling hours of research.
"Fleur," Harry said in surprise, taking a quick step back.
"'Ello, 'Arry," Fleur smiled. "Are you out for a walk?"
"Yeah," Harry nodded. "Just a quick one… to clear my head before I start doing some research."
"Would you like some company?" Fleur asked softly.
"Sure," Harry shrugged, not really minding either way. Rain was no longer falling, but the ground was damp and small puddles could be found lying here and there.
The two walked silently for a few minutes until Harry remembered his conversation with Cho at lunch.
"Have you got a date for the Yule Ball yet?" Harry asked Fleur curiously.
"One of ze seventh year Hufflepuffs," Fleur nodded. "What about you? Viktor mentioned you were going wiz zat girl – Ginny – but she ees the one you are not talking to now, correct?"
"Yeah, I'm going with Luna now," Harry nodded glumly.
"I am sorry," Fleur told him softly. Fleur didn't even know the whole story, as Harry didn't want many knowing about his 'problem', so it was rather nice that she was acting understanding.
"It's alright," Harry forced himself to adopt a light tone. "Y'know, I think it's time I head back to do my research. I'll – er – see you around." He hurried off, leaving a faintly concerned Fleur to stand by herself near the Whomping Willow.
Upon reaching the library, Harry bit back a groan as he saw Hermione, Ginny and Ron sitting at a table working on their Charms homework. He couldn't, however, hold back the overpowering waves of anger and betrayal that shot up from the pit of his stomach.
Sighing, knowing he couldn't simply run and hide every time he saw his so-called friends, Harry forced himself to enter the library and ignore the stares piercing his back as he browsed the shelves, picking selective books – he still wanted to learn more about Fleur's charm, but he was open to other ideas too, if he could find them. Not wanting to stay in the library with his fellow Gryffindors, Harry checked the books out and headed over to the Marauder Quarters.
"Alright, cub?" Remus asked as Harry settled himself down to read.
"Fine," Harry said, fighting to keep his voice steady. Fleur only wanted to help – stop overreacting at everything! "Just researching," he said, his voice much more steady.
"You're turning worse than old bookworm Moony here," Sirius said lightly, entering from his bedroom. He came over to ruffle Harry's hair. "Sure everything's alright?"
"Everything's fine," Harry said in a firm voice, keeping his gaze on his book.
"I really wish we could help you with this," Sirius said softly, staring down at Harry's book.
"Don't we all," Harry muttered, turning the page.
"Are you sure you're alright, cub?" Remus asked, sounding concerned.
"I'm fine," Harry said in a rather snappish tone. "I just – I want peace to read… and I couldn't in the library because H– Hermione - and the others – were there. Just… stop with the questions, okay? I'm fine." Sirius and Remus turned quiet after that, but Harry didn't miss the irritating looks of concern each kept sending him.
Harry went to bed not long after, only to be plagued all night by nightmares that resulted in him waking up at an ungodly hour early Thursday morning. He listened carefully as his breathing evened out and was relieved to find he hadn't woken anyone up. Letting out an irritated sigh, Harry quietly climbed out of bed and headed down to the kitchens, where he wasn't all too surprised to find only a handful of elves awake. It is only four am, and they have to sleep sometime.
After a worryingly small breakfast – am I losing my appetite again? – Harry headed outside, summoning his broom to him. He warmed up by racing around the pitch at an alarming speed before slowing down to a relaxing broom ride around the grounds, skimming low over the lake and even flying up to the Owlery where he briefly watched Hedwig sleeping. She looks so peaceful, Harry mused as he sat silently on his broom. It was only when heavy rain started to fall and his fingers became numb that Harry let out a regretful sigh and stored his broom away, heading to the castle to dry off before his first class of the day; Charms.
Nothing much happened in Charms; Ron kept shooting odd glances at him and Hermione kept trying to talk to him, but Harry kept his head down and ignored the two Gryffindors. His concentration was rather off today, though, so he didn't really get much done. Thankfully Flitwick was rather sympathetic and made no remark.
Care of Magical Creatures wasn't much better. His lack of concentration added to the misfortune of being partnered with Neville resulted in both Gryffindors being stung rather severely by the Blast-Ended Skrewts that they were supposed to be walking round the grounds. After apologising profusely and trying to assure a guilty-looking Hagrid that it wasn't his fault, Harry followed Neville up to the Hospital Wing.
Madam Pomfrey hadn't been able to heal the stings completely, so by the time Harry (after skipping lunch) and Neville went to Defence Against the Dark Arts, they were both still wincing every time they moved too much – a fact Sirius seemed to pick up on, as he didn't force them to do much in class. He did, however, ask Harry to stay behind after the bell rang.
"Talk to me, kiddo. What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Harry replied. He rolled his eyes at the look that appeared on Sirius' face. "Neville and I weren't paying attention in Hagrid's class. The Skrewts attacked us."
"Which explains the wincing," Sirius nodded. "What about the fact that I heard you leaving at four o'clock this morning?"
"I thought you were asleep!"
"I stayed up rather late with Moony last night," Sirius said, shaking his head. It was only then that Harry noticed the darker-than-usual bags under his godfathers eyes. "Was it a vision? Nightmare?"
"Nightmare," Harry said reluctantly. "It's nothing, really – everyone gets them, Sirius."
"You get them more than most, though," Sirius said sadly, stretching his arm out to ruffle Harry's hair. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"I can handle a nightmare, Padfoot," Harry said softly.
"I know, kiddo," Sirius said, equally as softly. "Just remember, though – we want to help, me and Moony. We can't do that if you don't talk to us."
"If I have a problem I think you can help with, I'll come to you."
"That's just it, Harry!" Sirius exclaimed. "It's not even about whether or not we can help you solve it – talking helps. Bottling everything up-"
"Just makes it worse, yeah," Harry cut across him. "I know, Sirius. And I know I should talk – I just can't, alright?" Suddenly feeling a rather strange mixture of irritancy and loneliness, Harry pushed past Sirius to escape outside, desperately needing a walk to help him cool off. Where'd those feelings come from?
His original plan had been to skip dinner but when, at close to nine o'clock, his stomach rumbled, Harry was forced to go back up to the castle to get some food from the kitchens. He ended up eating very little of it before he headed back to Sirius and Remus, where he ignored their concerned questions and went straight to bed. Why can't my life ever be nice and easy?
At least he didn't have as many nightmares – nor did he wake up too early the next morning. Though six thirty was still earlier than he would have liked, it was a far cry better than four am. Yawning and stretching, Harry got up and dressed, jumping when he headed out to find Remus sitting in front of the fire, reading a book.
"Hey," Harry said, voice oddly flat.
"Hello, Harry," Remus said in a somewhat careful tone.
"I'm sorry," Harry said, a hint more emotion in his voice as he sat down beside Remus. "For last night. I know you were worried."
"We were," Remus agreed. "Did something happen?"
"Not really," Harry shook his head. "I just feel… I mean… You and Sirius want to help – you're trying so hard…"
"I think I understand what you're trying to say," Remus said, smiling sympathetically. "We both know it's going to take time, Harry. You don't suddenly change from being independent to sharing your problems – it's going to take some work from all of us."
"I know," Harry said, his voice once again flat. Remus smiled slightly and wrapped an arm around Harry, pulling him into a hug.
"Just give it time, cub," Remus told him softly. "We'll sort everything out eventually."
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
The next couple of weeks went by without too much drama. After one particularly violent nightmare, Harry had felt the need to cut himself, but had exited his bedroom only to walk straight into Remus. After a very long and awkward silence, Harry had told Remus about his nightmare and the result of it. Sirius had woken up halfway through the conversation, grumbling about their voices being too loud, and the two Marauders had proceeded to distract Harry for the rest of the morning before classes with tales of old pranks.
He didn't get any more visions from Voldemort, either, and he wasn't sure whether to be pleased or anxious about it. On one hand, it was good; he could certainly do without the pain that accompanied every single vision. On the other, though, he hated not knowing what could be next. Did Voldemort have another plan to kill Harry? Had he found out anything on Peter or his accomplice yet?
Schoolwork was increasing, though, giving Harry less time to dwell on such thoughts. It also gave him less time to research, which was starting to worry him. It was now the last week of term – it would be Christmas so very soon – and he still didn't have any idea how to breathe underwater for an hour; he hadn't even found anything on the strange Charm that Fleur had used outside in the rain.
Another Hogsmeade trip was scheduled for the seventeenth of December, for which Harry was grateful as he still had a couple of Christmas gifts to buy – though he had bought most on the last trip. The arrival of this trip also brought another dilemma to Harry – last trip he had bought Christmas presents for Hermione and Ginny. What was he going to do with them – give them to the girls anyway or chuck them away? It seemed such a waste to get rid of them, and he couldn't help but feel guilty at the thought of not giving the two presents, however angry he was at them. In the end, he decided he would give them their presents anyway and hope it didn't arise awkward questions.
And so, on Saturday the seventeenth of December, Harry woke up early for the traditional Quidditch game (it was dry, thankfully) – albeit shorter than usual - before grabbing a light breakfast and heading to Hogsmeade with Viktor and Fleur, who, whilst not all too fussed about Hogsmeade, were adamant they go with Harry to keep him company. The three headed off just before noon, their first destination being the Shrieking Shack, the one and only place Fleur wanted to visit.
"Ees eet really 'aunted?" Fleur asked as the three stood outside the wall, staring out into the grounds.
"Not really," Harry smiled. "You two know about – err – Remus' condition, right?" The two nodded. "Well, when he was a student at Hogwarts, he had to be kept away from everyone during the full moon, so they took him to the Shrieking Shack."
"Really?" Viktor was impressed. "Have you ever been inside it before?"
"A few times," Harry said with a small nod. "The Whomping Willow is planted right over the entrance. I could take you two inside it sometime if you want."
"Yes, please!" Fleur said, her eyes brimming with excitement. Harry had to smile.
After the Shrieking Shack Harry took them to the Three Broomsticks. Fleur copied Harry, ordering a Butterbeer, whilst Viktor tried something called 'Firewhiskey' which Harry could remember the Weasley twins talking about in his third year. Having warmed up, they visited Zonkos and Honeydukes before heading back to the castle. As much as he loved Fleur and Viktor, Hogsmeade just wasn't the same without Hermione, Ron or Ginny.
The last week of classes was as gruelling as ever with the exception of Defence Against the Dark Arts. Sirius seemed to be going out of his way to make the class as fun as possible for everyone. Tuesday had the whole class learning various 'fun' spells – revising ones such as Rictusempra (which tickled them) and Tarantallegra (which caused them to dance) that they head learned in earlier years, including new ones like the bubble hex (caused them to breathe out annoying little bubbles) and the wing-disarm (caused tiny wings to appear on the side of their wings, which would fly away and leave them disarmed. It was rather easy to counter, though). Having learned these 'fun' spells, they had to use them in duels on Thursday to see how creative they were. That class had everyone in stitches and left Harry and Sirius feeling extremely proud of Neville who had won two duels that class. It seemed Neville was rather quick-thinking when he had to be.
Finally, it was Friday and Harry was in his last class of term – Potions. Snape hadn't treated their last classes of term at all different, so Harry wasn't surprised when the class had to brew a rather tricky potion. He probably enjoys watching us struggle; it's hard to concentrate when Christmas is on the edge of your mind, Harry thought with a little amusement. Snape might not be the cold-hearted bastard he'd thought him to be in his First year, but he was by no means a kind teacher, either. Thankfully, Harry seemed to do his potion okay, and wasn't terribly upset to hand it in for grading. He was about to leave with Neville when Snape asked him to wait behind. Shrugging at Neville's curious glance, Harry did so, waiting until everyone had left before approaching his uncle.
"Something wrong?" Harry asked lightly. Snape shook his head slowly.
"I was merely wondering if you'd like a break from the training sessions over the holidays." Harry stared at the Potions professor, gobsmacked. Since when does he let anyone off lightly for anything because of Chrismtas?
"S-sure," Harry said, trying to conceal a grin. He's going soft. "I'll probably keep practicing a little on my own, though." Snape nodded understandingly.
"We'll start back after the first week of term," he said softly. Just as Harry was about to leave, Snape spoke again. "I would take a good look at your present." Harry turned around to face Snape warily. "I am not allowed to directly help you with the Task, but if I point you in the right direction…"
"Thanks," Harry smiled a little and exited the classroom. He was grateful for the help, but he sincerely hoped Snape wouldn't get in trouble. He's a Slytherin, you twit. The cunning snake with brains. He'll know what he's doing.
After a quick dinner – Sirius and Remus will be on my case for weeks if I skip it again – Harry headed out into the grounds, ready to relax and let comforting thoughts fill his mind. He adopted his usual spot near the lake, though decided to lean against a tree for support this time as he closed his eyes, letting the bittern wind run over his face. He wasn't all too surprised when he sensed someone approaching and cracked open one eye to see a smiling Fleur coming over to him.
"I 'aven't seen you zis relaxed in a long time," Fleur commented with a soft smile.
"Christmas will do that to a person," Harry agreed, closing his eyes again. "There's a lot of things to look forward to. Presents, Christmas feast - two weeks off school."
"What about ze Ball?" Fleur asked, curiosity lacing her voice.
"Not so fussed about that," Harry shrugged, trying to keep emotion out of his voice. "I'm not fond of dancing, my past experiences with parties have been, on the whole, rather bad, and I'm probably going to be sitting on my own half the night."
"But we will be there!" Fleur exclaimed. "Viktor, Cedric, Cho and I would never leave you on your own!"
"I don't want you lot spoiling your night, following me around to keep me company," Harry said, opening his eyes to look at Fleur. "You all have your own friends, your own plans. Don't worry about me," he finished softly. "I wouldn't be going if I didn't have to open the damn thing. I'll probably leave pretty early, spend the evening with Sirius and Remus."
"Being with you won't spoil our evening," Fleur protested. "We like being with you – that ees the whole point of being a friend, ees it not?" Harry just shrugged, knowing there was no way he was going to change her mind.
Fleur had to leave soon after, as one of her Beauxbatons friends had found them and asked Fleur for help with something. After brushing off Fleur's apologies with a small smile, Harry found himself on his own again, staring out at the lake with only his own thoughts for company. It was as a small fish sent ripples across the water that he suddenly felt an insane need to cast spells at the water. As he stood up, taking aim with his wand, his mind flashed back to something he had read in a book once. Little 'exercises' like this can increase the strength of your magic, Harry thought to himself with a small smile. Glancing around, he was relieved to find he was completely alone, though he wasn't sure why he didn't want anyone watching. Shrugging to himself a little, he began casting 'Stupefy's into the water as powerfully as he could.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Having gone to bed early last night, Harry was the first awake in the Marauder Quarters on Christmas morning. He didn't want to start opening presents on his own, though, so he settled down in front of the comfortingly warm fire and flicked through a book on easy defensive non-verbal spells, something which Harry thought might come in useful, as he had no idea how easy it would be to speak underwater. Remus joined him nearly an hour later with reading, and the two waited patiently for Sirius, ever the late-riser, to clamber out of bed with an excited tone of voice that was worthy of a five year old. Finally, they started opening their presents.
Remus had given Harry a wand-holster for his wrist, something that he didn't doubt would come in rather useful in future. Sirius had given him a rather handy penknife which could cut through almost anything, undo almost any kind of knot and could counter a wide variety of door lock spells with its blade. Snape had given him some sort of Charms book that he had never seen before, but was looking forward to reading after remembering both his hint and Fleurs earlier Charm that kept the two dry from rain. Hermione and Ginny had both given him some books, making him rather grateful that he had decided to give them their presents after all, and the Weasley twins had given him a wide variety of joke items. Hagrid had given him cakes which he doubted he would ever eat, and he had the usual from Mrs Weasley – a home-knitted jumper and a box of fudge. He also received an Auror-level book of hexes from Tonks, several different books from Cedric, Fleur, Viktor and Cho and an odd pair of socks from Dobby, which made him chuckle slightly, as one sock had a pattern of cartoonish versions of Harry's face and the other a pattern of snitches and broomsticks. Harry was extremely relieved to find he had managed to find presents for everyone who had given him one, otherwise he would probably have felt rather guilty the rest of the day.
The three skipped breakfast, opting to have a large lunch instead, and were just about to go down to the kitchens – normally they ate in the Quarters, but Harry wanted to visit Dobby – when the door opened and in walked a slender woman with short, bubble-gum pink hair.
"Tonks!" Harry said with a grin, letting her give him a large hug and annoying ruffle of the hair.
"Wotcher, Harry," Tonks grinned back at him. "Having a good Christmas?" Harry nodded enthusiastically, rolling his eyes at the soft laughs coming from Sirius and Remus.
"We were just heading down to the kitchens for some lunch," Sirius said, stepping neatly past the two. "Care to join us?"
Down in the kitchens, Kreacher was nowhere in sight, for which Harry was grateful. He had gotten the house-elf a small gift, and would rather Sirius didn't know about it – he wasn't entirely sure how his godfather would react to that. He couldn't hold back a grin when he saw Dobby happily wearing the bright, orange scarf Harry had given him for Christmas, though, and had to actually cover his ears at the squeal the over-excited house-elf let out as he noticed what socks Harry was wearing. Harry, Sirius and Remus happily filled Tonks in on everything that had been happening at Hogwarts before she likewise told them about her job, not that she had much to tell. Being an Auror was pretty boring, apparently, as there were so few Dark Wizards that actually needed capturing. Harry had frowned a little at this, but otherwise kept his emotions to himself. Be careful what you wish for, Tonks. You might just get it. He didn't want to depress himself on Christmas, but he couldn't help but think of the highly-possible return of Voldemort and his followers. After lunch, having noticed Harry's suddenly subdued actions, the three adults took it upon themselves to drag everyone outside and start a snowball fight, which several Gryffindors, Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs soon joined.
Finally, they all headed in to dry off before dinner, as everyone was absolutely soaked.
"Are you going to the Ball tonight?" Harry asked curiously as he sat in front of the fire, preferring it to the strange feeling the Drying Charm gave him.
"Of course," Tonks grinned. Out of the corner of his eye, Harry saw his two guardians look up at that.
"D-d'you have a partner?" Harry asked curiously. Tonks frowned slightly at his stutter, but otherwise ignored it.
"Of course," she repeated, using the same grin as before. Harry rolled his eyes.
"And who, exactly, is my baby cousin dating?" Sirius asked, joining them by the fire. "I do, of course, need to make dire threats to make sure he treats you right."
"I don't think Molly would appreciate that, Padfoot," Tonks said lightly. Sirius paled and Harry looked up at her curiously before it dawned on him.
"You're dating Charlie?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Percy was too young, and Bill had a girlfriend, so it could only be him. Tonks mischievous smile was the only answer he needed.
Harry wasn't completely dry by the time they had to leave for the feast, so he ended up using magic to dry himself anyway. He didn't mind too much, though, as it was hard to feel down about anything with all the ridiculously bad jokes everyone kept cracking. Harry didn't talk as they headed towards the hall, preferring to let the adults have some time to themselves. Sirius and Remus don't get to see Tonks that often anymore, I know they miss her. The three adults headed up to the head table when they arrived at the hall, Harry opting to sit with Neville. He had never really talked to the slightly round boy before, but he was a good friend, and was cleverer than he seemed at first glance.
"Having a good Christmas?" Neville asked merrily as he shuffled along to give Harry a space to sit.
"Brilliant," Harry grinned. He nodded up towards the head table, "Tonks even managed to make it. It's good to have her around again, I've missed her a lot. Thanks for the book, too. How's it been at the Tower?"
"Pretty good," Neville said amiably. "The Twins did… err… get rather excited with the prank items Lee gave them, though."
"Ouch," Harry said with a wince. "I'm glad I wasn't around for that." Neville smiled before he sobered a little. "Is something wrong?" Harry asked with a small frown.
"Err…" Neville said nervously. Harry felt his frown deepen; it wasn't often that Neville felt nervous around his friends. "Listen, I know you… argued with Ginny… and you're taking Luna to the Ball, right?" Harry nodded, then smiled as he realized what was coming.
"You decided to take Ginny," he stated. When Neville glanced at him in surprise, Harry made sure his smile was kind, knowing his nervous friend needed reassuring. "You can take her, you know. I'm upset with her, but it would be pretty harsh for her to suddenly miss out on the Ball she was looking forward to. Besides, what happened is between me and her – you're allowed to take who you want." He knew he was started to ramble a little, but hey – at least it seemed to be working, as Neville lost some of his nervous twitching.
"Thanks, Harry," Neville said, his voice considerably brighter.
As Harry worked his way slowly through large platefuls of food, he couldn't help feeling a little bad for Fleur and Krum, who were out in their respective boats and coaches with much smaller feasts than inside Hogwarts. He didn't doubt their schools would have good food, but he knew neither school had brought many house-elves with them. He didn't have long to linger on this as Luna soon ambled over, sitting herself down on Harry's left side.
"Luna!" Harry said, surprise in his voice. "Er – hi."
"Hello, Harry," the blonde girl said in her usual, dreamy voice. She pulled a plate towards her and started piling food on it before turning to Harry. "What are you wearing tonight?"
"Uh – black dress robes," he said, frowning curiously.
"Oh, that's alright then," Luna smiled brightly at him. When Harry sent her a questions glance, she smiled even brighter. "I just didn't want our colours to clash too much. I'm not into fashion the same way as everyone else, but if you were going to wear red robes then my purple dress would have looked horrid."
"Black's a neutral colour, isn't it?" Harry asked Neville. The round boy just shrugged his shoulders. Harry rolled his eyes before continuing. "Well I think it is. Don't worry, Luna – black matches any colour."
Feeling unusually full – so much so, in fact, that he actually felt sick – Harry left the feast in a good mood, despite the inevitably boring evening ahead. Still, it wouldn't be too bad if he left halfway through the night. After opening the Ball, no-one would miss him. With this slightly more cheerful thought in place, Harry headed back to the Marauder Quarters, wanting to read a little of Snapes book before the Ball. He had barely sat down, though, when the door opened and in came Sirius, Remus and Tonks.
"You could have waited on us, you know," Sirius said accusingly.
"I thought you were talking to the Professors," Harry shrugged.
"Only while we waited for you to finish eating," Tonks grinned.
"You're not planning on reading on Christmas, are you?" Sirius asked, mock shock evident in his voice. Harry snatched the book up, giving Sirius a cool look.
"I think," Harry said, voice a little cooler than he wanted, "this book has the answer to one of my problems regarding the Second Task."
"Is something wrong, Harry?" Sirius asked, concern evident in his voice. Maybe I was a little touchy.
"No," Harry said shortly. He sat the book reluctantly back onto the sofa. "If you have a better idea of how to spend the next hour, please do tell."
"Go ahead and read, cub," Remus told him with a small smile. "Sirius? Help me with something?" Harry sat down on the sofa with a roll of the eyes and opened his book. And here I thought Remus was good at being subtle. Could he have made it any more obvious he wants to talk about me?
Harry was only a chapter into the book when he had to stop and get ready for the Ball. The books bigger than it looks. He hadn't found anything promising yet, but he knew Snape would never have said anything if it weren't true. He may be a devious Slytherin, but he rarely lies. Unless it's to Voldemort.
After nearly ten minutes of struggling with his dress robes – these are so awkward – Harry found Sirius and Remus in similar robes to his whilst Tonks had a blue dress and shoulder-length brunette hair.
"You look nice," Harry told her, earning a ruffle to his hair.
As arranged, Harry met up with Luna just outside the Great Hall, where she was already talking to the Champions and their partners. Harry couldn't help but stare at Hermione when he first saw her; she looked so… different. Her hair was sleek, done up in some sort of fancy hairstyle, and she had an elegant – well, as elegant as possible for a fourteen year old – pink dress on. He quickly averted his gaze before anyone noticed and slipped his arm through Lunas.
"You're looking very 'andsome tonight, 'Arry," Fleur told him with a smile.
"Yes, he is, isn't he?" Luna asked dreamily.
"And you two are beautiful," Harry smiled before glancing at his watch. "When do we go in?"
"That would be now, Mr Potter," a stern voice – yet with a hint of warmth – said from behind him.
"Er, alright Professor McGonagall," Harry said uncomfortably. Looking around at his friends, Harry was glad to see he wasn't the only one feeling nervous. From inside the hall he could hear music starting up and next minute Luna was dragging him into the hall, following Cedric and Cho.
Harry felt his face burning a little at all the attention but nevertheless made his way to the dance-floor with Luna. The hall was a beautiful mass of glittering ice-sculptures, Christmas trees and decorations. Hogwarts was always beautiful on Christmas, but the staff and house-elves had outdone themselves this year. When they reached the dance floor, Harry was glad he'd managed to read a book on dancing – and even gladder when he realized Luna was a good dancer, and seemed to be leading him. He struggled to both copy her and keep himself from looking like a complete idiot, but it was rather hard. Needless to say, he was rather glad when the first song finished. After clapping, many other couples had stepped up to the dance floor, leaving him free to go.
"You can dance with anyone you like," Harry told Luna with a smile. "I'm sure you've noticed I'm not exactly a good dancer."
"No, you're not," Luna replied with a smile. "I only know because Daddy used to take me to special events." She then glanced around before looking back at Harry, a slightly more serious look on her face. "I saw Ginny not too long ago," she told him, her voice quieter than he had ever heard it. "She and Hermione want to talk to you."
"Er – alright," Harry said uncomfortably. Great. On Christmas, too. As much as I dislike the Ball already, our 'chat' will probably end up ruining the whole night. Harry let out a small sigh and wondered off to a table in search of a drink.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Harry was careful to avoid any girls who were looking for dance partners as he walked around the Hall, occasionally talking to Neville, Seamus or Dean. He had yet to run into any of the Champions, for which he was glad – it meant they were having fun, rather than tailing him to keep him company. He had also yet to see Ginny or Hermione, which he guessed was kind of bad. He wanted their 'talk' done and over with, rather than walking around for half the night dreading it. Luckily, fate took pity on him – next thing he knew, he had bumped straight into Hermione, spilling his juice all down himself.
"Harry!" Hermione said, voice a little high. "I'm sorry – Scourgify – I was just looking for you…"
"I know," Harry said coolly. "Luna told me. What did you want to talk about?"
"Er, well – Ginny wants to talk, too. We should really go find her, first - "
"Right here," Ginny had appeared just behind Hermione. "We should probably go outside, so people don't eavesdrop." Ginny held none of the nervousness in her voice that Hermione did as she led them outside. Harry had to smile when he saw several large Christmas trees decorating the grounds – Hogwarts had certainly never done that in his previous years at the school.
"Spit it out, then," Harry said coolly as the two females slowed down near Hagrids hut.
"Alright," Hermione said with uncharacteristic nervousness. "Look – we're really sorry," she started in a wavering voice. "You really shouldn't be mad at Ginny, either – she didn't want to do this in the first place. I – I talked her into it, because I was convinced something was wrong… she just barely agreed. And – well, I know it was wrong t-to betray your trust like that, to ignore your right to privacy, but I s-swear I only wanted to help." Hermiones eyes were bright with unshed tears, which in itself was such an unusual sight that Harry felt his anger leaving him. He actually felt sorry for her.
"We know it'll take a lot for you to trust us again," Ginny said in a small yet strong voice. "We want to try and make it up to you, though. It's been horrible these past few weeks, not being able to talk to you… please, Harry."
Harry let out a long, tired sigh as he turned to stare out at the nearby lake. It was dark out, so the moon and stars were reflected in the water. He had to admit he missed his two Gryffindor friends, even if they had hurt him. It hadn't helped that he'd lost them so soon after falling out with Ron. Finally, taking a deep breath, Harry turned back to face his two… friends.
"Alright," he said softly. "We'll try. I'm not saying we're going to be…. Well… as close as we were before, but I'm willing to give it a shot. If you do anything like that again, though…"
"We wont, Harry, we promise!" Joy and relief were evident in Hermiones voice despite the bright tears still lingering on her eyes.
Hermione and Ginny went inside soon after, shivering from the cold, but Harry stayed outside to gather his thoughts together. He was friends with Hermione and Ginny again – a fact he couldn't decide whether to be happy or unhappy about. Sure, he'd missed them – and it was such a relief to have them back – but they had really betrayed his trust. He let out a sigh again. They had only wanted to help – and, really, he would have been rather worried if either of them had kept coming to the Tower injured. One step at a time, he told himself. Just sit back and see how it goes.
It was nearly midnight when Harry finally went back to the Marauder Quarters, shivering uncontrollably from the cold and unable to remember the incantation for the warming Charm. Dumbass. As he entered, he found Remus sitting on the sofa, lost in thought.
"Hullo, Moony," Harry said softly, not wanting to surprise his guardian.
"Hello, cub," Remus smiled at him, patting the empty space beside him. "The Ball too much for you?" He frowned as he felt Harry shivering.
"I've been outside," Harry explained. "I was – er – talking to Hermione and Ginny."
"About?" Remus prompted gently, pulling out his wand and casting a warming Charm on Harry.
"Thanks," Harry smiled gratefully. "Anyway – they just wanted to be friends again…" Harry trailed off with a shrug. "I miss them… so I told them we could try."
"That's great, Harry," Remus hugged him tightly.
"Yeah," Harry said, his voice a tad uncertain. He gazed at the fire for a few moments before standing up with a yawn. "I'm beat," he said with a small smile. "Thanks."
"What for?" Remus frowned.
"A great Christmas," Harry smiled.
Chapter 10 is now up.
Chapters 11 and 12 are complete and awaiting betaing. Chappy 11 will probably be up next Tuesday or Wednesday, though I may have to wait 'til Friday. We'll see.
Chapter 13 is taking a bit longer to write because the parts I'm at are incredibly boring to write, so yeah. Ugh.
Also, mm, this fic might not be as long as I first predicted... I've cut the chapter plan down from 20 to 15/16.
On a brighter - well, more depressing, really- note; something really... uhm, big is going to happen in chapter 13. Let's just say Cedrics death won't be the only dark thing in this fic... I won't say too much lest I spoil it. : )
As always, read and review! Well, obviously you've read- woops, I'm starting to ramble. I'm usually above begging, but reviews really help motivate me to write - I mean, hey! I completed chapter 12 in two days because I felt good about the reviews I was getting. Hint.
Oh, and a second 'as always'; thanks to my fab beta, Roxy aka Suspended. : )