Disclaimer: The majority of the characters used in this story belong to the Fifty Shades trilogy. They are and remain EL James's property. Infamouschelsea is in no way affiliated with James or her publishers. Any recognisable brands, places, persons, music or film are the property of their respectful owners. No copyright infringement is intended.

SuzB – Yes! Christian and Ana have come a long way, and they have gained so much trust and respect for each other. As always, so glad to hear you liked the chapter and were looking forward to this one. :) I hope you like it. Thank you. Much Love x

Lolaxo – Thank you so much. I've always aimed to stay true to the original books, so it's wonderful to hear you think I'm doing that. :) The resolution is coming. I promise! Much Love and I hope you like this update x

Guest (I love…) – Oh thank you! It's great to hear you're enjoying the story! Much Love x

Quick turn around this time!

REMINDER: I updated Chapter 10 very recently - please check you've read that first. I don't want anyone getting confused! :)

Thank you for the reviews, follows, favourites and general loveliness. Cannot thank you all enough. Your messages and support is incredible and inspiring.

More coming as soon as physically possible!

Much Love and Happy Readings... ;)

Chelsea x

Lunch was mostly liquid for Kate and Grace. They started with Cosmopolitans before moving onto the non-alcoholic menu, joining me in testing all of them. The Orange-and-Mango Fizz quickly became my favourite. It was so tangy and sweet. Grace spent hours telling us stories of her and Carrick when they first married – boy, she wasn't kidding when she said her marriage wasn't perfect! By the sound of things, they both had fiery, explosive tempers when they were younger.

After a while, Kate came out of her shell. She laughed and smiled at Grace's stories. We began discussing Elliot and to my surprise, Kate was okay. She didn't look upset anymore, especially when Grace reassured her that Elliot will calm down.

"Elliot is as stubborn as a mule, but he always comes back. He can't help himself." Grace said, clutching Kate's hands just before we left the building. "Let him make the first move. Trust me, he will. I know my son. I know how his mind works."

I drove Kate back to her apartment in the Pike Place Market. She wanted to be at home, telling me all she needed was a hot bath, a glass of wine, and her own bed. Ethan was there when I dropped her off, and he immediately pulled his sister into his chest for a bear hug. Kate and Ethan have never been close, per se. But it's obvious how much they care for one another. She's his little sister. He'll do anything for her. I edged out of their apartment quietly, pulling the door to a gentle close. I smiled as I walked back to the SUV out front. I imagine Blip hugging his younger siblings, ready to protect and love them as much as Ethan does Kate, and Christian does Mia. I slipped into the back of the car and allowed Bailey to drive me home. I really, really hate rush hour traffic, and it's much worse on a Saturday.

Bailey pulled into the driveway just after 5p.m. She waited until I was safely inside the house before she and Ryan took off in the smaller, silver Audi he was driving. I slipped off my shoes and jacket, pulling my phone from my purse as I left the hallway. No new messages. He must be busy, I tell myself. Christian usually messages me when he's on his way home. He knows I worry about him. I have since the Charlie Tango accident. I head upstairs and move into our bedroom, slipping straight through to the bathroom where I began shedding my clothes. I feel tired and my eyes are starting to smart. All I want to do is remove my makeup, throw my hair into a bun, and haul my fat ass into some comfy pyjamas. I found one of Christian's hooded sweatshirts in the laundry basket. It's soft and grey and god it just oozes his smell. I tug it into place, holding the collar up to my nose. I love this... I love him.

I spent the next few minutes running around the bedroom, tidying up the chaos from last night and this morning. There are cushions and sheets everywhere, but it doesn't take too long to set things straight. After making the bed, I perch myself onto it and open up Christian's Mac. I open up my emails. I haven't checked them properly since late last night. In amongst the usual spam and pestering from various departments in Grey Publishing, sits a new message. My eyes shoot open as I read who sent it.

"What the…"

To: Anastasia Grey

Subject: Annie

Date: 31 March 2012 15:13:03

From: Ray Steele

Hi Annie,

I hope to God you get this. I have no idea what I am doing with this bloody thing. I woke up this morning to find some delivery guy at my door. I thought I was going senile. I know I didn't order a computer. Especially one this expensive – it's a Mac, whatever that means.

The delivery guy set it up. There was a note attached to the box from Christian. He said I needed this so I can keep in touch with you. Have calls become obsolete? He said I need to Skype with you. You're going to have to explain all this to me. I feel like an old man with this thing.

I miss you, Annie. It feels like years since I last saw you. How are you and the baby doing? You both good? Is Christian still treating you right?

Dad

My heart raced in my chest, bouncing all over the place. Ray… Christian bought Ray a computer?

My fingers were shaking with excitement as I replied to him. My eyes pricked with tears.

To: Ray Steele

Subject: DADDY!

Date: 31 March 2012 17:31:39

From: Anastasia Grey

I can't believe this! Dad, I had no idea Christian was sending you a computer. God, this is unbelievable! I'm lost for words.

Dad, I miss you so, so much! I hate that you're back in Portland while I'm here. I feel like you're missing out on so much. I know you're only a car ride away, but I miss not being able to see you whenever I want. Especially now the baby's coming. I need my Dad around.

I guess that's why Christian got you the computer. We can see each other through webcams. That's what Skype is for, Dad. It's easy to understand, don't worry. I'll talk you through it.

I'm great. The baby is doing great, too. Blip's growing at a healthy pace and is moving around a ton. The sleepless nights have already kicked in. Blip likes to wriggle around at night. I think he or she might be a soccer star after all.

You don't have to worry about Christian, Dad. He's taking care of me. He'll never hurt me. I trust him.

I love you. Are you okay? How is your knee?

Ana x

I wasn't expecting a reply from him, so I started to draft a few messages to members of the GP board. I managed to outline the bulk of them when Ray's email popped up.

To: Anastasia Grey

Subject: Getting the hang of this

Date: 31 March 2012 17:45:02

From: Ray Steele

Hey, this computer is pretty good. I like it a lot. Tell Christian I said thanks. What's his email? I just typed your name in and it was there. Delivery guy must have added it for me.

I miss seeing you too. I'm coming up to Seattle in a few weeks. Kate invited me to her wedding but I was thinking about staying there for a few days, maybe spend some time with you? I'm sure I can get a hotel room for a week.

Glad to hear you and the baby are good. You sure know how to scare your old man, Annie. I was worried when you got taken into hospital a few months back. But you're okay now, right? It was just something to do with your iron, wasn't it?

I know Christian is a good man. I'm glad you have him, but I will always worry about my little girl.

My knee is getting better. Still seeing the Dr about it. It aches but I'll cope.

I will email you later. I'm about to cook some dinner. Make sure you eat something. I love you.

Dad

I laugh at his message. Ray Steele does not cook dinner. Ray Steele orders dinner. I can picture him heading for the phone now, ready to dial for a stuffed crust pizza with extra anchovies. My Daddy…

I reply to him quickly before shutting down Christian's laptop. I tell him that Christian's email will probably be in his contacts, too. Christian Grey is a man of means and he never misses a detail like that.

I'm giddy at the idea of Ray coming to Seattle. He hasn't seen our house yet. I can't wait to show him the nursery. He'll love the rocking chair we have in there. Ray loves carpentry. He's obsessed with it. But he won't be staying in a hotel. He'll stay here, with us. I wouldn't have it any other way, and I'm sure Christian will agree with me.

What if he doesn't? My subconscious offers.

"Tough," I answer her, willing her to run along and cause mischief somewhere else. "Ray's my father."

I pick up the laptop and tuck it under my arm, heading downstairs to put it back in Christian's office. I'll need to grab a cup of tea before I retire to my office and sift through the last few chapters of the manuscript I have been working on. It need to get it to print before I head on maternity leave in a few weeks time.

"Whoa –"

Hitting the bottom step, Christian almost knocked into me as he readied himself to charge up the stairs. He came to an abrupt halt, flinging his hands out to grab me. I hardly moved except for a sharp intake of breath.

"Sorry."

"It's okay... No harm done." I shake my head at him and smile. I lean forward and bring my lips to his. "Hey."

"Hi." He pecked his lips to mine and pulled back, releasing me and shoving his hands down to his sides.

"Just getting home from seeing Elliot?" I speculate. He shook his head, running his hand through his hair.

"I only got out of Flynn's office twenty minutes ago."

"You were with him all this time? Jesus, that's a long session." I exhale.

"It was," Christian agreed with me. He rocked on his heels, looking past me and up the staircase. He's restless and uneasy.

"There are some workout clothes in the gym." I tell him, extending my arm down the hallway. I offer an understanding smile. "I thought you might need them."

He breathed a long sigh of relief, his shoulders dropping in an instant. He hovered forward to kiss my cheek and then twisted, running off down the hall at lightning speed. He needs to burn it off. I can see it in his eyes, and I know Flynn will have drained him of details and memories. I can't believe he's been with him all this time. How much was there for them to discuss?

Christian doesn't look angry or upset. But my Fifty has had years of masking his true feelings. He knows how to build up his wall so high that no one stands a chance of seeing how he really feels. I've come to learn the more subtle differences in him – the way he tilts his head down and to the left, the way his breaths become deep and heavy, the way he fidgets. After most sessions with Flynn, he starts to automatically build that wall up again. It's second nature to him. Running helps him to break it down. It exhausts and calms him. It keeps my Christian strong and unguarded.

If he had a favourite meal, I'd cook it for him. But in lieu of that, I'm taking a leap out of Ray's book and ordering takeout.

After ordering in some Chinese takeout, I curled up on the couch and hit play on a random DVD I picked up from the shelf near the television. Lucky for me, it was Rebecca with Laurence Olivier. One of my favourites…

I spent a few hours on my own whilst Christian thrashed around in the gym. I left him to it. When he finally emerged, he looked like he had just been in the ring with Tyson and Holyfield. He had a quick shower and then came and snuggled with me on the couch, tucking into his dinner. We didn't talk much. We just cuddled. He held me as I curled into his side.

He was asleep before the movie ended. I didn't wake him until after I switched off the TV. I couldn't bear to disturb him, but thankfully he woke when the room became silent. I told him to go up to bed. I said I'd follow once I had cleared up a little. He gave me a grunt and a flick of his head as he trudged out of the room. The lack of sleep last night has caught up with him. He'll be asleep before his head hits the pillow.

I soon joined him after double checking the door was locked and the front gates were secure. The bedroom was pitched in black as I entered. Christian had pulled the drapes to a close before getting into bed. He never does that.

I look over the bed and find him in a deep sleep, lying on his front with his head turned to the side. The sheet is hanging around his thighs, showing me he's wearing only a pair of black Calvin Klein's. I'm careful as I climb in beside him. I pull the sheet around him, protecting him from the light chill in the air.

I admire him for a few seconds. His lips are puckered slightly, forming a gentle pout. His cheeks are flushed and rosy. I resist the urge to lean over and kiss him. I'll wake him up if I do. Instead, I press my fingertips to my lips and then lightly place them onto his.

"Goodnight, baby –" I whisper as quietly as I could manage. I rolled onto my other side, to face away from him. I glance at the clock before shutting my eyes. 11:36p.m.

I hate this…

I squeeze my thighs together as I swing out of bed. I groan and rub my eyes. They're stinging and refusing to open. I'm so tired… I'm full... I need to stop drinking so much water before going to bed.

I drag myself to the bathroom, relying on my sense of direction to guide me. Starting tomorrow, I'm not drinking as much. My bladder can't cope with this all day, every day. I push open the door, letting it go too harshly. It bounced off the wall, firing a loud, angry sound through the room. I jumped and grimaced.

"Shh!" I snap at it. "You'll wake him up."

"I'm already awake."

Christian muttered to me from across the bathroom. I squinted, opening my eyes slightly, and found a figure resembling him at the sink.

"Why are you up?" I mumbled, rolling my head towards him as I sat down on the toilet.

"Same reason you are," He answered quietly, gesturing to me. He wiped his hands on a towel. "I had to pee."

"Right…" I nodded. I can already feel my brain shutting off and falling back into sleep mode. I hoist myself up and flush. I yawn loudly, covering my mouth with my forearm. "So sleepy…"

"Come on..." Christian's hands came to my shoulders. He began ushering me into the bedroom.

"Hands –" I tell him, sticking mine into the air. He turned me on my heel and walked me over to the counter. He turned on the faucet and I plunged my hands under it. He waited for me to finish and then helped dry my hands before missioning me back to bed.

He moved me through the bedroom and set me back onto the mattress. He shushed me and beckoned me to lie down. I settled easily.

1:49a.m.

Can I… Please, can I just…

I'm sorry…

Please don't…

I open my eyes suddenly and jerk my head to the side.

"Christian?"

"Please…" He grumbled under his breath. He frowned hard. I lean up onto my elbows and look down on him, checking he's okay. His eyes are shut. "I want to…"

His eyebrows furrow further down his face. He nudged his head into the pillow and twitched, jerking his head back with force.

"Baby… Christian?" I whispered to him, careful not to jump him from his sleep.

He didn't move for a few seconds. I could swear he wasn't even breathing. He just lay there, still and frowning. I moved closer to him, snapping back when he moaned and rolled away from me. His shoulders tensed and he brought his knees up.

"Okay…" He muttered. He let out a long sigh, releasing all the air in his chest, and then he fell lax.

"Christian?"

His breaths became shallow and regular again, barely a flicker of movement from him. I watched him from behind for a long while, refusing to deter my eyes from him just in case. I got up from the bed and moved around to his side, to really check how he was doing, and he looked peaceful. His expression had softened, returning to his usual, angelic state. I shook my head at him. That pit in my stomach whirls again, bringing nerves and fearfulness to my core.

I lay back down next to him. I looked between him, the ceiling, and the clock.

2:57a.m.

3:05a.m.

3:14a.m.

3:21a.m…

3:59a.m. Wide awake. Blip's tossing and turning inside me. He's kicking my pelvis, punching all around my navel and head-butting my ribs… over and over and over.

I rub my hand around my stomach, trying to soothe him.

They're big, strong kicks… They're in the bed, too, not just my stomach.

Christian's stirring again. He's unable to lie still. He keeps kicking out at the sheets, trying to knock them off his body. He manages to push them off himself but then, seconds later, he reaches for them and tugs them back around his legs. He's done this a hundred times already. It's some sort of routine.

He turns onto his left side and sighs. He turns onto his right side and grunts. He falls onto his back and –

"But why?" He utters, squeezing his eyes shut. "Look… Look…"

I want to wake him up and end this torture for him, but I can't. I'll give him a heart attack if I do.

I reach over and lay my hand next to his. I place my little finger around his, moving slowly. I linked our fingers.

"It's alright, baby." I say to him. "You're okay… You're in control."

You need to get up. Now… my subconscious growls at me from across the room. I quickly sit up and look over to her at the door. She's waving me over. She's serious.

The door's open and the light in the hallway is on. I glance down at the bed. He's gone. I run my hand over the space beside me. The bedding is crumpled but warm.

Get up… She orders me again. I nod and pull myself out of bed. I stumble as I make my way to the door. I pick up my robe on the way and wrap it around my front, tying it together in the middle. My subconscious walks with me, holding my hand and leading me down the stairs and through the hall, taking me straight to Christian's office. I felt something pull me towards his door. It was a hard, heavy, sinking kind of feeling…

I push open his door. His office is flooded with light, showing off his room of white, onyx and grey.

He's sitting at his desk with his head in his hands. He's hunched forward, looking at something in front of him. He's reading?

As I move closer to him, I notice just how messy his desk is. It's covered in folders and papers. Piles and piles of them… everywhere!

He lifts his head to me, dragging his eyes to meet with mine. His are wide, red-rimmed, and bloodshot. I can't make out the grey in them. He's pale. He shook his head at me.

"Christian, what's wrong?" I ask him, trying my damned best to keep the dread out of my voice. I gulp hard. "What are you doing down here? You're not working, are you?"

He remained silent, just shaking his head at me. I edged closer and closer to him, until I came to his side. I set my hand on his shoulder. That's when I saw it.

My box – open. The contents of it scattered around him. My photos, my papers, my memories, his -

"Baby?"

My eyes watered. He looks so…

I cup my hand around his cheek. I stroke my thumb over his dry, open mouth. He lets me. He closed his eyes.

"Her name was Ella." He mumbled. His voice was small and unsullied. "Ella… Her name was Ella."