Marmalade

Chapter 11: Now You Tell Me

By Takara-Star-Chan

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(2 months later)

Nikki's memory was beginning to come back in small flashes. She could tell her life was tough; but she couldn't seem to piece all the random memories together. She knew that Imoru was her husband. But, she hadn't told him this yet. She didn't know the whole story of their relationship, but she had a feeling that telling him would open something that wasn't good. But that also meant…she had a son. The young man with orange hair.

But what to do? Imoru wanted to take the life from Kyo's wife! They hadn't talked about it since New Year's when he had tried the first time. Was he still considering it? She didn't know. She didn't have full memory, so she didn't know why exactly Imoru wanted to do it.

She did remember that things were…not so good before she died. She didn't know the details, but she knew their marriage had fallen apart; but…why…and how?

Another thing she was wondering about was her connection with the ghost girl, Yoshi. She looked so familiar, and, the day she saved her from the demon, she couldn't explain it…but she felt a deep bond with her. It was somewhat like the connection she felt at first with Imoru…only her heart didn't flutter when she was with her. More like…a best friend, or a sister.

Nikki stared out the window, feeling very awkward. She was filled with so many emotions; she wasn't sure what to do. If her memories would just come back, fully, she'd have a better idea of what she should do.

She pulled out the drawing that Yoshi had given her from her pocket. It was drawn by her son as a young boy. For some reason, she felt a strong urge to this young man; to embrace him, and apologize, letting him know how much she loved him. Apologizing for committing suicide and leaving him without a mother. Also though, there was something else she must apologize for. But what for? She wished her memories would return.

"See? I'm not scared a bit."

Another memory flashed through her mind. She stared, smiling at her son, trying to put on a brave face for him. But…it was a lie. She was lying…as to not hurt her son. She wasn't exactly sure what about him to be frightened of.

She stood up, and walked into the living room, heart growing heavier and heavier. With every memory that came back, the more her thoughts and feelings fitted like a puzzle pieces together. Most of it was quite unpleasant.

The one thing that was the hardest thing for her to admit was that one day, and soon, she'd have to pick Imoru or her son's side. That, she knew, would be hard.

She laid down in Imoru's chair as she did everyday, thinking hard. She would do anything to get her memories back. Soon, she would go see Yoshi. She was the only one that could possibly help her. She was too scared to talk to Imoru.

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Yoshi sat on the floor in front of Kyo, and grinned at him. "Whatcha doing, Kyo?"

He looked up from his book and smiled at her. "Rereading the Death Note books that Tohru brought for me again."

"Again? You've read them over ten times, right?" Yoshi laughed at him.

"Something like that. I don't know…I just really like it," he replied, shaking his head.

Then they heard something fall to the floor.

"Not again!" Tohru exclaimed.

Kyo sighed, and stood up. "Let's go see what she knocked over this time."

They walked into the kitchen, seeing that Tohru had somehow knocked a big bowl of flour onto the floor. She had it all over her, and was struggling to clean it up; but her large baby belly kept getting in the way. She was only making the mess worse.

Yoshi walked over to her. "Um…how did this happen?"

"I-I was craving some chocolate chip cookies. I didn't want to burden Kyo-kun again…" she still continued to try to clean up, but she was only making a bigger mess.

Kyo walked over to her, and tilted her face up. "How did you knock it over?"

"Um, I had turned for the next ingredient, and my belly knocked it off the counter…," she replied, blushing.

Kyo then let out a laugh. She was so adorable! "Thought so." He helped her stand up, and went to go get a washcloth for her to wipe the flour off of her. He placed the washcloth against her face. "If you wanted cookies, I could have gone and got some for you. I'll go get them."

"B-but…you've done so much for me already! I couldn't possibly ask you to do more!" she looked at him in worry.

"You're right. But I'm not doing because you asked me to. I'm doing it 'cause I want to…and because I love you," he told her, leaning in and kissing her nose. Then he grinned at her.

"Okay," Tohru said, looking down at the flour.

"I'll clean this up," Yoshi said, kneeling down. "You go sit."

"But-"

"Buh buh buh! Go sit!" Yoshi said sternly.

"Yes, Yoshi-san," Tohru said in defeat.

Kyo walked over to her and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I'll go get you your cookies. I'll be back soon," he leaned in and kissed her. "Be good, okay?" He reached down and touched her belly, then laughed. "They're certainly lively."

"Yes," Tohru said with a small smile, feeling the one of the twins kicking. Then, Kyo stood straight, walking toward the door. As he walked out, he walked pass a…shinigami? He watched as she flew by. She too, turned to look at him with wide eyes. He thought she looked kind of familiar. But, he didn't focus on this. He figured whoever she was, she was there to see Sara or Kasuke.

"You really should do everything with great care," Yoshi said, standing up. "You've been knocking over so many things already." She walked over to the closet and pulled out a broom.

"Er…yes," Tohru replied with a heavy sigh. She gasped as one of the babies (she thought it may be the girl, since she was higher up.) kicked hard inside of her. "Oh!" she then giggled. "I think my little girl will be a feisty one."

Yoshi looked up at her. She gave her an amused grin. "Your baby is still kicking?"

"Yes. The boy moves, he's just not as active," she said, giggling again. "He's a gentle one."

"The little girl might be more like Kyo. That's what I'm thinking," Yoshi pushed all of the flour onto the dustpan, and dumped it into the garbage.

"Maybe so," Tohru replied thoughtfully.

Yoshi put the broom and dustpan away, then noticing that someone had dropped mail through the door. "Oh?" She walked over and picked up the pile. On top was a letter addressed to Tohru. "You have a letter, Tohru-san."

"From who?"

Yoshi read over it carefully. "An Arisa Uotani-san."

Tohru's eyes lit up. "Uo-chan is one of my best friends!"

"Really?" Yoshi replied, walking over to her, handing over the letter. Then Tohru reached for it, only to jerk it away. "What's the password?"

"Wha-what? Password?" Tohru said in shock. "Is there some secret password that I don't know about that's required to receive my mail?"

"Yes. No! Of course not!" Yoshi laughed, gently whapping it against her head. Then she handed it to her.

"Heh heh," Tohru laughed nervously, taking the envelope. "You were just joking then…"

Then she opened the envelope, and began to read.

Dear Tohru,

It's been too long! I miss you so much! I'm doing really well, Kureno is too. We actually just recently…um, eloped…well, two months ago, actually. We would have let you know sooner, but we didn't want anyone to know at first. We're in the area we eloped to. We rented an apartment, and will be staying here for just a little while longer.

Even more news…since we eloped, I started developing strange issues. Just like you, I'm pregnant. I was really shocked…Kureno was too. It's really cool though. I love it so much already. It's the strangest thing. I feel 'motherly' ha ha. The other cool thing is how close our children are in age. I hear play dates coming on :).

Well, Kureno and I have already discussed names. If it's a girl, then it'll be Kimora. If it's a boy, it'll be named after him. I think it's a girl, though.

Call me soon, 'kay? My # currently is 725-888-7528. (a/n: I made this up. Do not call it.).

Love,

Uo-Chan.

Tohru sat staring at the letter in surprise. "Uo-chan is having a baby."

"She is one of your besties, right?" Yoshi asked, cocking her head.

"Yes. Uo-chan is a very dear friend of mine," Tohru looked up at her with a smile.

"Really? It's cool you're both having children though. They'll definitely have friends from the very beginning!" She said with a grin.

Tohru nodded in agreement. "Yes. That's…true." Then she broke down into tears.

"Tohru-san! What's wrong?" Yoshi asked in worry.

"I-I miss Uo-chan…and all of my friends! It's so wrong though! I have a wonderful home here. Wonderful new friends…and an amazing husband who thinks the world of me! How could I possibly long for more?" She told Yoshi, covering her face.

Yoshi reached up, touching her shoulder. "There's nothing wrong with you for missing her. Our hearts will always long for those we love. Believe me-I know. The young man I was supposed to marry…my heart yearns and aches for him everyday."

Tohru looked up at her in surprise. "You were…going to marry someone, Yoshi-san? I'm so sorry."

"Hm." Then she looked up, seeing something surprising. Nikki was standing on the porch. "Tohru-san…I'll talk to you later." She then turned and walked toward the porch.

"Nikki?" Yoshi said in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

She gave her a small smile. "I…need to talk to you."

"Do you want to go to the roof?" She asked, cocking her head.

"Sure," Nikki replied with a nod.

When they were on the roof, they sat side by side, staring out at the town before them.

"The reason I came," Nikki said, rubbing her hands together. "Is because…I think you can help me."

"What do you need help with?" Yoshi asked in concern.

"My memory is starting to come back…in small flashes. All I know for certain is that, one, I was married to Imoru. Two, Kyo is my son. Three, our marriage fell apart because of something to do with Kyo. Fourth, I committed suicide. Fifth, my relationship with you was significant as well. Those are the only things I'm certain of." She sighed looking at Yoshi intently.

Yoshi sat in thought for a minute, trying to decide what to say. Then she said, "All those things are true. Your marriage fell apart, as a result of Imoru's attitude toward the way Kyo was born. The Sohmas used to have this curse where people transformed into animals from the zodiac legend. Kyo was possessed by the spirit of the cat-the most despised of them. He had another form where he would transform into a disgustingly hideous deformed monster if he wasn't wearing his beads. The beads kept him from transforming."

Nikki's eyes widened as another memory came back to her. She remembered. Tears flooded her eyes as she remembered how she had lied to her own son about what she felt about his true form. The way it looked…the smell…the way it provoked fear in her heart…was overwhelming. Deep regret stabbed at her as she remembered how she wouldn't allow him out of the house. She was a horrible mother. Overprotective and…a liar. "I…was…a bad mother to him! I can't believe the way I treated him!"

Yoshi threw her arms around her. "No! You were not a bad mother! You were desperate, and not sure what else what to do. You obviously loved him very much. It sure didn't make anything easier when…" she sighed composing herself for what she'd say next. "It didn't make anything easier with the way Imoru treated you and him. You were trying to make both of them happy…but…truthfully, both of them being happy just wasn't possible."

Nikki nodded, more memories coming into play. Yoshi was right. Imoru would have only been happy if she had abandoned Kyo completely. She couldn't do that though. She realized how stupid she had been…taking everything Imoru said personally…thinking it to be true…not bothering to show any back bone. She tried, she really did. He had walked all over both of them…because she had let him. If she had stood up and told him what's what, maybe…things wouldn't have took a turn for the worst like they did.

"It's not your fault, Nikki. In times that are difficult…our emotions sometimes get in the way of things. Your love for both Kyo and Imoru probably blinded you from figuring out the right thing to do. I'm sure you were confused. So much was happening." Yoshi told her, squeezing her tighter.

Then Nikki suddenly knew who Yoshi was. "You're my sister, aren't you?"

"Yes," Yoshi said with a nod. "I am." She tilted her head up with a grin. "I'm glad you remember me."

Nikki smiled back. "Me too." She turned her face out toward the green foliage, sighing. "How shortly after me did you die?"

She quickly sat up. "A week."

Nikki turned to her, mouth agape. "A week, what happened?"

Yoshi's fist tightened, and she swallowed hard. "I was murdered…by Imoru."

Her eyes took on a look of hurt and shock. "I-I…I'm so sorry…" she shut her eyes tight trying to hold back tears. The man she loved…was a murderer. He really was. What was she supposed to do? She needed to go away for awhile…away from Imoru…from everyone to think. She stood up, the tears beginning to fall. "Yoshi…thank you. Thank you for your help…but I'm going away for a while. I need to think."

"Where will you go?" Yoshi asked, standing up.

Nikki paused in thought for a moment. Then she said, "The bottom of the ocean." Her wings began to flutter, then she threw herself into the air. She would spend time in the depths of the ocean by herself…thinking…sorting things out. Not to mention deciding which side she'd stand on…Kyo's or Imoru's.

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Kira walked onto that front porch and sat, staring at all of the trees. The sun was setting, and a few stars were beginning to come out. She remembered times she would sit out on the porch with her mother and watch the sunset. It was surprising…five months after living with this family was definitely healing her. She felt…happy. What happened earlier this year didn't hurt as bad when she thought of it. Slowly but surely, she was beginning to accept herself the way she was.

But she also found that she really missed Akito and Shigure. When they had left, she felt very sad. She wondered when she'd get to see them again. She knew that at some point she'd be leaving. Kayui had just decided to sell the house. He hadn't told anyone yet; but she knew. Every once in a while, she could hear people's thoughts; and it just so happened that she heard Kayui's this time. She hoped that they'd move to the same area that Kyo and Tohru would be going back to…so that she could see Shigure and Akito.

"Hey, Chickadee," Yoshi said, sitting next to her. "Whatcha doin'?"

Kira hugged her knees to her chest. "Thinkin'."

"What about?" Yoshi asked in curiosity.

The little girl sighed heavily. "I miss Shigure-san and Akito-san." Then she quickly changed the subject. "But…um…who was that girl that came? The shinigami…"

Yoshi looked at her, considering what to say. I might as well tell her everything. She thought, shaking her head. "Believe it or not, that was my sister. Kyo-chan's mother. She came to me for help…but I don't think she told me everything. She's conflicted about something. I'm not sure what. She knows something big about Imoru," Yoshi told her, still shaking her head.

Kira turned, grabbing Yoshi's arm. "Yoshi…I've told you before! I think Kyo's daddy wants to hurt Tohru-onee! Kasuke-nii was thinking it once. I think he wants to hurt her! I do I do I do!"

She looked at Kira intently. "Maybe so. But Imoru can't get to her now. He doesn't even know where we're living!"

"Won't we move soon, though?" Kira asked sadly.

"It seems that way," Yoshi replied with a nod. "But…we shouldn't worry about that until the time comes."

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Tohru stared at Arisa's letter in utter shock. Pregnant. Boy, was she out of the loop. What about Hana-Chan? She had talked to her and Shishou-san two weeks ago. It was almost as if they were both in love with eachother. She really missed everyone. She had come with Kyo-kun because she knew that she couldn't live without him. She had told him this before they had moved; but she also knew how much it would hurt her to be away from everyone. Now, it was really sinking in.

She felt so…depressed. She loved being with Kyo, but she really missed her friends. Big time.

She then heard feet coming up the ladder. Then, Kyo's orange head poked up. He grinned, and pulled himself all the way up. He walked over to her, and sat down. "What are ya doing up here in the attic?" He asked, handing her the bag of freshly baked cookies.

Tohru took it and leaned up on his shoulder. "Thinking…and reading this over and over again." She handed the letters to him. He began to read, eyes widening. When he was finished, he looked up at her, seeing a tear fall.

"Hey…this is good though, right? Why are you crying?" He wiped it away.

"I-I miss everyone," she said, starting to sob. "I feel so…horrible."

"There's nothing wrong with missing everyone, Tohru. I knew you would," he said, holding her tight.

Tohru looked up at him. "I just…feel so bad though. I actually thought…I hate myself for this…" She paused fearing to go on.

"What?"

She swallowed hard. "That maybe…I shouldn't have…decided to marry you so soon. I actually thought that I should have thought it through."

Kyo's face became hurt. "Oh." He stood up, turning toward the ladder to go downstairs.

"Wait! Kyo-kun!" Tohru said, standing up. "Wait! Just listen!"

He said nothing, continuing to go down the ladder. Tohru fell to her knees, sobbing harder. What had she done? What if…what she just said…ruined their relationship? What she said hit below the belt, she knew. What if he was thinking that she thought that he wasn't a good husband? She stared down at the bag of warm, gooey, cookies. She couldn't bring herself to eat them. She didn't feel like she deserved them now.

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A/N: Oh no! Their first real conflict as a married couple!!! Will they resolve it??????