Title: I'm Coming Home

Summary: Ryan finally gathers the courage to go home after ten years. Takes place after Ryan proposes but before Alexis gets pregnant.

Genre: Family

Characters: Ryan

Ryan pulled up to a large brick home and killed the engine before just sitting quietly trying to gather the courage to walk up to the front door.

Alexis stared out the windshield at the home and surrounding fields and smiled at the scene that looked like it came off a postcard, "This is beautiful." When there wasn't a response she sat back in her seat and grabbed her fiancées hand. "You've come this far, you can do this. They know you're coming. Come on." She climbed from the vehicle and circled around to his side and grabbed his trembling hand tightly as they made their way up to the wrap around porch.

The steps creaked slightly as they passed over them and when they approached the door Alexis waited patiently for Ryan to knock.

A full minute passed before Ryan finally lifted his hand and knocked firmly on the bright red door. Steps could be heard from inside and it took everything he had to stay still and not shy away when the handle began to turn.

The door swung open and Ryan offered a weak smile, "Hi ma."

An extremely short woman with auburn hair smattered with a few grey strands rushed forward and hugged him tightly, "Oh my little angel. You're finally home." He melted into the embrace that he had missed so much. She felt the exact same to hug, still smelt like she had spent all day in the kitchen. He tried to keep hold of his emotions but a few tears still escaped his watering eyes.

She pulled away and looked over his face and features as she wiped away his tears and her own. "Oh honey you're so handsome," she said with a smile as she looked him up and down. Alexis shifting slightly behind Ryan caught the woman's attention and she smiled warmly at his companion, "You must be Alexis." After pulling her into a hug she softly whispered, "Thank you for bringing my baby boy home."

With the initial meeting over Lila ushered them inside and of course straight to the kitchen where she sat them down and proceeded to shower them with food, the staple of every Irish home. Alexis graciously took the offered snacks after their long drive but Ryan and his mother didn't touch anything, just sat staring at each other.

"House looks the same," he commented.

"Of course it does, I can't get your father to do anything. He's always out in the garage of his tinkering on things that serve no purpose."

Ryan bit his lip, "Where is da?"

Seeing his rising nervousness Alexis subtly placed her hand on his thigh and squeezed. He had spoken a little about his childhood since he had begun talking to his parents over the phone but he never gave explicit details about his relationship with his mother or father. The only things she had really gotten out of everything he told her was that his mother tended to baby him and his father always viewed him as somewhat of a disappointment, no matter what he did it was never good enough so he had simply stopped trying. In one of her conversations with Ava she had let it slip that their father had beat Ryan a few times growing up, not horrible but enough to leave bruises. Alexis had a strong feeling that even before everything happened when he was twenty-two their relationship had been a love/hate one.

Heavy footsteps and a slamming door made Ryan tense and Lila smile reassuringly, "It's ok my baby." The footsteps entered the kitchen behind Ryan and he sucked in a deep breath before he stood and turned to face his dad. "Hi da." The room was thick with tension, Ryan having no idea how to act around someone he hadn't seen in almost ten years and yelled at the last time they spoke. He had been disrespectful and just plain mean, an embarrassment to the entire family. Time seemed to stand still and the much larger man approached slowly until stopping directly in front of his son who couldn't stop the flinch that flashed across his face.

"I've missed ya so much ya stupid boy," the man whispered before crushing him in a hug. Stunned it took Ryan a moment to react and hug him back.

"Da I'm so sorry for everything I said…"

Patrick stopped him, "It's in the past. None of it matters. My runt has returned."

Alexis watched them with a relieved smile, thankful that the reunion was going so well. Patrick was much larger than she realized now that she was seeing him in person. He wasn't thin but wasn't by any means heavy and looked to be about as tall as Castle with graying hair and deep green eyes. She stood politely when the man approached, "It's nice to finally meet you."

Patrick pulled her into a bear hug and Ryan could only watch in slight distrust because he definitely did not remember his father being this affectionate and welcoming. He loved his dad but they were just different people and never could seem to get on the same page, now though it seemed he had finally relaxed and settled into a comfortable existence instead of the angry man he used to be.

With the stress from seeing his dad again evaporating with every second he finally realized how hungry he was and dug into his mother's food, which was just as delicious as it had always been.

"What happened to your accent, you hiding it?" Patrick asked after a while of talking lightly.

Ryan laughed, "It faded da. The city works it out of you after a while."

He shook his head, "It don't sound right, you speaking like this."

Alexis giggled and Ryan met her eyes before finally relenting and letting his accent thicken. "Is tha' better, ya happy da?"

"That's more like it."

"Well tell us about everything since we last saw you," Lila insisted.

Ryan scratched the back of his head trying to think of where he could even start, "Wow, uh… Well about a year and a half after I last saw you guys I transferred into homicide. Still there." Trying to cover ten years with people that weren't there for any of it was proving difficult. "I have a son," he said with a small smile.

Lila smiled brightly, "Tell me all about him."

Ryan began to relax more as he covered a topic that he knew everything about; he could talk about his son for days. "His name is Devlin and he's almost seven. He's beautiful; blonde hair and blue eyes. Super smart and sweet. Just amazing." He pulled out his phone and pulled up a picture before handing it to his mother and father.

Both awed at the smiling boy with the missing teeth but Patrick could sense he was missing something and glanced at Alexis, "He's not…"

Ryan answered for her, "No. I was married for a few years. Her name was Jenny, she uh… she passed away when Dev was two."

"Oh honey," Lila whispered. "I'm so sorry."

"Me too, you guys would have loved her." The conversation quickly moved on from the delicate subject and as more time passed Ryan became more comfortable speaking about all the things that had happened over the years.

Alexis watched with an easy smile as Ryan showed them more pictures of Dev and told them about his life. The conversation shifted from English to Irish a few times, Ryan trying to keep it in English so Alexis wouldn't feel left out but finding at times it was easier to switch to the tongue he was brought up with.

The sound of the door swinging open and slamming made everyone turn and Ryan's eyes widened when Ava's voice shouted, "Where the hell is he?"

Ryan slid out of his chair and walked to the living room where Ava instantly walked up to him with a livid expression and only stopped when they were mere inches away. Ava was the smallest of them all, barely 5'1" with long brown hair thrown up into a messy bun and huge green eyes.

Furious whispers were heard by everyone else and Alexis gasped when Ava suddenly punched Ryan, not slapped, punched. Ryan instantly retaliated with a hard shove that almost knocked her down and a moment later they were rolling on the floor attacking each other. Alexis looked at Patrick and Lila in concern but they were just sitting there while the two hurled Irish curses at each other. Patrick couldn't stop grinning and Lila looked like she was going to faint from the language.

Patrick finally stood and shouted, "That's enough."

Both people on the floor froze, Ryan's hand on Ava's shoulder trying to shove her away while her grip on his hair tightened. They stood and glared at each other while they checked for injuries, the worst being the slight swelling to Ryan's eye and a brutal bite mark on Ava's forearm.

A small laugh sounded from Ava when Ryan rubbed his scalp where she had been pulling and a moment later they were both laughing openly and honestly. "I've been waiting to do that for ten years you jerk."

"Jerk," he said astonished. "You punched me! You're a brat."

"And you're an ass. Now where's the girl?" She looked around and after trying to fix her hair she walked over like she hadn't just assaulted someone. "I'm Ava, it's great to meet you Alexis."

Alexis accepted her offered hug, "It's nice to meet you too."

With a small glance at her brother she casually asked, "How old are you?"

"Twenty-four."

Ava opened her mouth but stopped when a pillow slammed into the back of her head from the living room, "Don't Ava." She whipped around and glared at her brother before turning back around and smiling at the redhead.

"And how did you two meet?"

Alexis glanced at Kevin who quietly walked over and dropped into a chair between her and Ava. "My dad works with Kev, I've known him for a for years."

Patrick's eyebrows shot up, "He's an officer? And wasn't that uncomfortable for him and your other coworkers?"

Ryan nodded, "Definitely uncomfortable but everybody got over it and no, Castle's not a cop he's a writer."

Lila's eyes lit up, "It's not Richard Castle is it?" At Alexis's nod she squealed excitedly, "I love his books! Nikki Heat is wonderful." Ryan could see where this was heading and withheld a groan. "He supposedly writes about real police officers. Oh my God. Honey does he write about you?"

Ryan was blushing furiously, "It's fiction ma."

"He's Detective Sean Raley," Alexis blurted out with a grin. "And his partner Esposito is Detective Miguel Ochoa."

Ava began to laugh hysterically and Patrick perked up a bit, "Roach? They're a better team than Heat and Rook. We've been reading about our own son for years."

"I'm not like…" Ryan began but Alexis cut him off.

"He's spot on. The dorkiness, love of all technology, super sweet and loyal. Him and Esposito might as well be one person at the precinct. Dad makes the characters as real as possible without giving away their real names and lives."

Patrick looked at his son, "How's Nikki in real life?"

"Beckett's… tough, but in a good way. She's beautiful, super smart, great detective. She's like she is in the book minus the slutiness. I don't know, she's just Beckett."

Ava finally joined in, "Is she with Rook?"

Ryan met his fiancée's eyes and they both laughed, "No one knows, they seem like they're together but they have for years. Castle's been laying it on pretty thick lately though so maybe something will finally happen."

Everything was going pretty smoothly until Alexis said something without thinking. It's not like they didn't have a right to know but he didn't want them to worry about past events. "I think it was me moving in for that month that really finally got us truly together," Alexis said in response to Ava prodding more about their relationship.

Lila frowned, "Only a month? I don't understand. Don't you live together now?"

Ryan grimaced a little, "Lex moved in with me to take care of Dev and I before she actually moved in because I got... shot. Twice."

Silence rained down until Ava scooted over and hugged him close, "You can't die! You're my wonder twin. Shadow and light are two sides of the same coin, one cannot exist without the other."

Ryan chuckled, "First off we're not twins and you just butchered an old Hanna Barbera tv show and Zelda. Secondly I'm not dead."

"You almost died," Alexis said softly as she squeezed his hand. At Patrick's request she explained, "He got hit twice in the chest, one collapsed his lung and the other missed his heart by three millimeters. He was in a coma for nine days."

Lila began to cry and Patrick held her close while he frowned heavily. Ava grabbed his shirt and jerked it up before he could stop her and gently traced the now white scars. "Did you get the guy that did this?"

He nodded as the memory overtook him, his eyes clouding a little as he remembered how badly he had wanted to pull that trigger and just end the nightmare. "Right after I got back to work."

Patrick leaned forward, "Have you had anything else serious happen?"

"No. Just that," he answered as he popped back to the present.

"When did you get clean honey?" Lila asked carefully.

Ryan leaned back in his chair and crossed his arm fighting against his instinct to not talk about it. "I went undercover for fourteen months right after that Christmas before I decided I wanted to try for homicide. Some things went down when they did the bust that made me realize I needed a change. My transfer was granted and my new partner made me get clean."

"How many partner's have you had?" Patrick asked.

"Luckily just the one," he answered. "Javi and I have been together for eight years." A large yawn escaped him before he could stop it.

Lila of course jumped up and began to herd him to the living room, "Oh my baby, you're tired. You lie down and take a nap alright."

"Ma, I'm fine," he lightly argued as she forced him down on the couch.

She shook her head, "Nonsense. You just relax."

With a smile he allowed her to close the blinds and fluff a pillow and found that he was much more tired than he realized. After only a few minutes his eyes drifted shut and sleep pulled him under.

Lila just stood quietly watching her youngest sleep, tears gathering in her eyes as he curled up on one end. Large hands appeared on her shoulders and she leaned back into her husband. "I can't believe he's here."

Patrick agreed quietly, "I never said it but I was sure he was dead. Everyday I waited for the call that my son would never return. So what do we think about the girl?"

"She's wonderful," Lila answered. "Come on, let's go back to the kitchen."

Pictures were the next thing to come out much to Alexis's delight and the stories that came with them were priceless. A part of her was glad Ryan was sleeping because she knew he would be dying right now as they spoke about the time Ava locked him in the closet and when Leah dressed him up like a doll when he was a baby.

"So Kevin had a bad stutter?" she asked quietly knowing this was her only chance to hear more about it.

Lila nodded, "My poor baby. He had a terrible time trying to talk to people and the other kids were so horrible to him. We tried speech therapy but it took a few years for it to finally fade. That and his dyslexia..."

"He's dyslexic?" she asked in surprise.

Ava nodded, "Pretty bad. It's a miracle he did as well as he did in school and everything. Since you didn't know about it I'm guessing he's got it dealt with but does he still have the stutter?"

"When he gets flustered he stutters a little but it's not bad at all."

Alexis continued to flip through the pictures with a small smile as everyone described certain ones, Ava's stories completely hilarious while Lila's were more proud. She grinned at a few of him with his motorcycle.

Ava saw what she was looking at, "Did he tell you about that?"

Alexis nodded, "Yeah but I didn't get to see pictures of it. Look how cute he was."

"Took him long enough to get out of his awkward phase," Ava said flatly.

Alexis laughed, "He's still pretty awkward but that's part of why everyone loves him."

When she came upon the last pictures they had of him she closed the book and looked at Lila and Patrick. "This trip was kind of spur of the moment but next time I'll bring you guys pictures of the last ten years. There's a few blank spots but Jenny took a lot of pictures and I've been trying to also."

Something was tickling Ryan's nose and no matter how much he rubbed it it wouldn't go away. He finally blinked awake and smiled brightly at the sight of his oldest sister holding a few strands of her hair that she had been using to tease him. "Leah!"

Leah gathered Kevin into a hug once he sat up and rubbed her hands up and down his back, "Hey Booger."

He couldn't even take offense to the old nickname as he continued to hold her close. "You're so beautiful…and old."

She smirked and pulled back slightly, "I could say the same. I mean God Kev, you're in your thirties now. What happened to my Booger telling me that he'd never get wrinkles?"

"It's a laugh line Leah and at least I won't be fort.." he was cut off by a hand over his mouth and a pinch to his sides.

"Don't start with me. Everyone in the kitchen?" After he nodded she kissed his forehead and walked away.

A moment later a mountain of a man entered and looked at Kevin with a somewhat irritated expression, "The prodigal son has returned. Have Patrick and Lila pardoned you Kevin?"

Ryan crossed his arms and stared up at his brother-in-law, waiting to respond until Leah left the living room. "Harsh Seth. Nice to see you too."

Seth glanced around and after seeing they were alone pointed a finger in Ryan's face, "I'm the one that's been here for years taking care of the family because the only boy they had abandoned them. The last time I saw you was when you made my wife and kids cry at Christmas, you don't get to just show back up only to hurt everyone again."

"I'm clean Seth, I have been for eight years. I'm here to make amends and move on. I'm sorry for everything I did," he answered honestly, hands stuck in his pockets. The pair could only stare at each other until Seth spoke again.

"Why are you here anyway, what changed?"

A small smile appeared on Ryan's lips, "My fiancée decided it was time to fix this, she wanted ma and da to go to the wedding."

They continued their standoff until Seth finally smiled, "So the outlaw's back? You look good bro, little small but some things can't be helped."

"Har har," Ryan grinned as Alexis walked out of the other room and over to Kevin. Seth's eyebrow's rose and he looked at Kevin with a mischievous smile. Ryan slid his arm around her waist and looked at he taller man, "Alexis this is my brother-in-law Seth, Seth this is my fiancée Alexis."

The much larger man gently shook her hand; "I have to ask what in the world did you see in him to say yes to a proposal?"

Alexis turned to face Ryan and kissed him, "Everything."

Everyone returned to the kitchen and continued to snack on the food Lila kept producing from seemingly everywhere and Ryan felt disappointment at the fact Lydia and Julie couldn't make it. "Will they be here for Thanksgiving?"

Ava nodded, "Everyone comes home on Thanksgiving, and I mean everyone."

Lila didn't want to push it but she had to know, "Will you be joining us this year?"

He glanced at Alexis who bit her lip and he knew why. They always spent Thanksgiving with Castle, Beckett, Martha, and Jim. Esposito and Lanie were always invited but they usually did their own thing. Alexis answered for him, "Would it be alright if we brought a few people?"

"Who?" Patrick asked.

Ryan grinned knowing there was no way they were going to say no. "Rook and his mom and Nikki and her dad."

"Oh!" Lila shouted excitedly. "Of course!"

"Then it looks like we'll be here," Ryan answered from between his sisters who began to launch excitedly into stories from past Thanksgivings. Alexis's eyes widened when she heard that this year they were expecting sixteen adults, eight children, and four dogs. Ryan had told her his family was large but she had no idea it was that large, honestly she was looking forward to it because it was sure to be quite an experience.

Late the next day Ryan wandered out to the garage and stood at the entryway watching his dad sand down a chair leg. "You going to stand there and watch or help me?" He quickly entered and walked over to his dad who pointed at a pile of wood, "I've got three more legs to sand and restain, get to work." He lit a cigarette for himself and held up the pack to his son, "Cigarette?"

Ryan shook his head and let out a small laugh when Patrick asked, "You one of those health nuts?"

"No da, I just don't smoke."

They worked side by side not really talking until Patrick turned a little and watched him carefully do as he was told. "Son," he began and internally cringed when Ryan perked up at the unfamiliar term. "I know we never really saw eye to eye on very many things and I know I was a little too tough on you some times."

Ryan nodded and stayed quiet wondering where in the world this could be going.

"I just want to apologize for anything I might have done that hurt you growing up. I've had a lot of years to think about things and I know I handled a few things with you badly."

Ryan didn't stop sanding; he needed to keep his focus split to remain calm. "If you're talking about when you punished me for things it's ok. I know I was a little tough to be around sometimes."

Patrick shook his head, "It's not ok. I should have been more patient with you and that stutter. I made it worse and I see that know. It took a long time for me to realize that I should be glad you were different than me."

He wanted to keep his mouth shut but this was his opportunity to speak to his father one man to another. "Growing up it felt like nothing I did was good enough for you."

"In my eyes it wasn't," he answered and Ryan couldn't help but duck his head a little in embarrassment. "But that was on me," he continued. "I love you Kevin, I know I didn't say it as much as I should have growing up but I love you. So what that you weren't athletic, or that you would rather stay in the kitchen helping your mother cook than help me in the shed? You were small and sensitive…"

"You're making me sound like a poof."

Patrick laughed, "Sorry. I'm just trying to say that I respect you for who you are. You were always perfect even if I was too blind to see it. And look at you now, all grown up with a respectable career and a family. If I could do it over I would but I can't so all I can do is be better from now on."

Ryan continued to sand, knowing if he stopped it would only make this already uncomfortable conversation beyond awkward. "I love you too da and I want you to know that I never held anything against you. Even though you were a little tough you've always been a good father."

"How are you with your son?" Patrick asked curiously.

He shrugged, "Patient, supportive. I don't know. I think I'm doing pretty well. I don't treat him like he's seven, we talk about things and I listen to his opinions."

Both continued to work in silence until Patrick paused, "I'd love to meet him sometime."

"You will," Ryan answered simply and returned his dad's easy smile.

A couple hours later Ryan pulled out onto the highway with a small smile on his face. He would have loved to stay longer but he couldn't use his vacation days because of the upcoming wedding. This weekend had given him what he had wanted, a building block that he could build on and hope for the future and it was all because of his future wife. "Thank you."

She didn't have to ask what he was referring to, she knew him better than that so with a squeeze to his thigh she smiled. "You're welcome."