The thing about travelling from country to country as a nation is, that it's not merely as amazing as you would think it is. How do we get around so fast, going from one end of the globe to the other without the need for airplanes? Like Romano, just shooting up into the sky? No. I finally had the chance to find out for myself, and I have to say, it was not that much of a big deal really, rather insignificant in fact, so I won't waste any more time by describing it.
We got back to Moscow, me and my female counterpart, to Russia's house. I wondered whether they'd all gone out searching for me, or if they'd even noticed that I'd been kidnapped. My lovely Belarus would have noticed of course. That was out of the question, and to be honest I was surprised that she hadn't come bursting into England's cellar, sniffing me out like a bloodhound. I guess that there were limitations even to her obsessiveness.
Either way, I was weary when I approached and knocked on the front door. I hadn't even touched the wood, when the door flew open and Belarus came flaying at me, knocking off me feet and sending sprawling on the stone path that led to the house through the garden. I was too dazed to notice that under normal circumstances, this would have ended in a cracked skull for me. As it was, it hardly even hurt.
"BIG BROTHER!" she shouted at me, clawing at the front of my coat "VHY DID YOU LEAVE ME! VHY DID YOU RUN AVAY?!"
She looked livid, her face contorted in the same mad expression as when she chased after me when I ran from her after her proposal. She had proceeded to shake my torso vigorously, banging my head on the stone hard. Again, this should have caused me serious harm, but it didn't. Nations didn't bruise so easily.
"Get off me Bela! Get off me!" I shouted at her.
"TELL MEEEE! TELL MEEEEEEE!"
I was surprised to see that tears had begun to form in her eyes, and were slowly starting to roll down her cheeks. Was this…real?
"THEN STOP SHAKING ME!"
She did. I felt a lump grow on the back of my head, courtesy of her hitting my head down again and again.
"I vas kidnapped! I vould never leave yu!"
She didn't calm down, but her anger was redirected, not at me, but at those who had kidnapped me.
"WHO?!" she screeched.
"It was America, England, and France."
In the blink of an eye, she was standing again, dagger drawn.
"I VILL KILL THEM! I VILL KILL THEM FOR HURTING MY BIG BROTHER!"
I also got up, feeling the back of my head, and sure enough, there was a sizable bruise growing right there.
"It too late, Bela. Ve already deal vith dem."
"WE?!"
I gestured at my female counterpart, who was standing next to the front door, watching the scene with a face devoid of any expression.
For a moment, Belarus stood, immobile, then dashed at her, knife raised.
"YOU VILL NOT TAKE AWVAY MY BIG BROTHER! I VILL KILL YOU."
I was too late to grab her and stop her furious assault on my female self, but as it turned out, I didn't have to.
Her braid whipped through the air, and fastened herself around Belarus' arm, stopping her dead. Belarus struggled, then drew an additional knife from the folds of her dress with her free hand, and made to stab at her opponent.
I thought it was all over, but I was wrong yet again.
The braid had unraveled itself in a about a nanosecond, and how she had two long strands of hair, wrapping around each of Belarus' arms. Her face was still incredibly passive, even though two knives were directed against her, and Belarus was breathing hotly in her face. she was looking less and less like me by the minute.
"Bela! It's not how yu think!"
"Who…is…she?!" Belarus managed to squeeze out through gritted teeth.
"She is me! England summoned her when he vas trying to destroy me!"
Realization dawned upon her.
"She…is you?"
Belarus stopped struggling, and the braids, let her arms go, knotted themselves back together, and fell down, inanimate as they were supposed to be. My female counterpart gave Belarus a haughty look and tossed her braid back again, not saying a word.
Belarus put away her knives again. Secretly I was wondering just how many of those things she was hiding underneath her dress.
Russia joined us, smiling as ever.
"You vill tell us vhat happened, da?" he said.
"Da, I vill." I replied "But let us go inside, comrade. Some of us need to take a minute to calm down."
We all sat down in the living room. The three of us on a sofa. In my left was my female counterpart, staring around placidly. On only right was Belarus, glaring at her across me. I felt like I was sitting in the No Man's Land between two enemy trenches. Russia meanwhile took a seat in the single high-backed armchair facing us, smiling as ever.
"Vell?" he said to me.
I started to recount to him the tale of what had happened to me, of how America had knocked me out the moment I'd stepped outside, and how they'd tried to get rid of me using England's black magic, and ended up duplicating me instead. All the while Russia listened intently, and I finished, he nodded, as if I h confirmed something in his mind.
"Then you know vhat must be done, da?"
"Da comrade," I agreed with him.
Belarus, who had been growing ever more restless the further I'd gone with my story, now burst out in anger.
"I VILL KILL THEM! I VLL KILL THEM FOR VHAT THEY DID TO MY BIG BROTHER!"
The aura of menacing started swirling around her.
"Kill…kill…kill…kill…kill…"
I wanted revenge. No one would treat the great and powerful country of Ostrogot like that and get away with it! No one! I would make them suffer for having caused me this humiliation. They tried to kill me; they had tried to make me disappear. They thought me weakened, but in fact they had only made me stronger, my resolve harder.
"Ve must assemble our forces." I told Russia "Everyone who vill fight for our cause. Ve vill vage var against anyone who dares oppose us, and ve shall obliterate dem. Ve vill roll over dem, our armies pouncing with a roar like a great bear from the east!"
Russia nodded again.
"I vill send for the rest to join us, and together ve vill meet them."
We were all very much hyped up in that moment. The thought of war, of the slaughter that was to ensure enflamed all of us in passionate hatred and anger. Our auras rose as one, until the room had darkened as if it were the dead of night, the purple and pinkish, red and black hues swirling like flames around us. It was phenomenal to say the least.
The mood was broken however when I heard a scuffling sound from behind me, and turned my head just in time to see a strand of long brown hair disappearing around the corner. Someone had been listening.
The aura disappeared as fast as it had risen. I excused myself from the company and left them to make the necessary arrangements. I had no troops I could call up for the battle, so what was the point in hanging round. Besides, I could do my part by stopping our enemies gain a decisive tactical advantage.
I slowly crept outside of the living room, checking to see if no one was there. There wasn't, but I could hear the faintest of whispers. Further down the hall. Proceeded carefully, making sure to keep as quiet as I could, and thanked Russia that the floors were carpeted and muffled my heavy, boot-clad footfalls. I was growing ever closer, but before I was there I stopped, and looked to my right into the kitchen. I saw both Estonia and Latvia cowering under the table as if there was an earthquake. I took a step towards them, and the shrunk back. Someone was missing.
"Vhere is Lithuania?" I asked them in a cold tone.
Estonia just shook his head, as if he was trying to shake some torturous thought out of his ears. Latvia was quivering. Never mind, I knew where he was anyway. Ahead of me, the hall turned a corner, and the whispers were drawing ever close, until finally I could understand them.
"Poland! Poland, be quiet and listen to me, please!"
Lithuania was speaking in an imploring voice, using the old telephone just around the bend.
"You can tell me about your pony later, please Poland! There is something important I need to tell you!"
I relaxed. There was no need to hurry. Poland was sure to deter him much longer with something, and it would be ages before Lithuania could get anything across and warn him, and with him, the rest of the world.
"No…P-poland, I'm begging you! This is urgent! It's about Russia, and Belarus, and that new one, you know, the mean one, they're trying to-"
I could have none of that. I had been coming up behind Lithuania, and now the he was about to spill the beans, I put my one hand on his shoulder, making him fall silent immediately. With the other, I slowly pried the phone from his paralyzed grip and put it down on the fork, making the line go suddenly dead. Yes, it was slightly suspicious, but Poland would never be able to pick up the hint.
I bent down to whisper in Lithuania's ear.
"Yu veren't just about to tell him vhat ve are planning to do, da?" I asked him.
He frantically shook his head, brown hair flying everywhere.
"To me, it sounded like yu vere going to tell him our plans…"
"N-n-n-no, Mr. Ostrogot, not at all!"
"'The mean one' am I? Vell, ve vill see about dat, da?"
The next few hours were…complete turmoil, I think that would be the best way to put it. Russia took care of Lithuania…I don't know what he did to him, and neither did I really care. We had a head start, that was all that mattered at the moment. We all gathered troops in one place, together with our allies, China, Cuba, Vietnam and North Korea. Even Belarus and Ukraine chipped some troops in.
The thing about armies here was that, like the countries themselves, they were representative. There weren't several millions of troops gathering together in one place, instead, each nation brought around a dozen.
Russia brought several long-range mounted missile launchers, China supplied infantry, Cuba and Vietnam brought Fighter planes. Belarus, Ukraine, North Korea and me, we all had infantry as well. In my case, they were Russian soldiers, masquerading as 'Ostrogonian'. Russia had been kind enough to lend them to me, since I had none of my own.
I knew he had seen through my deception from the very start and this was the proof.
Was this what he wanted? A third world war? It was hard to imagine, even for Russia. Whatever he wanted, I wanted to see people getting hurt.
Together, we launched our assault, and it was easy going. We rolled over all of Northern and Eastern Europe; it was a blast, literally. We broke into the other nation's houses and beat them up if they didn't surrender. It was harmless really; no one ever got killed, just badly bruised and thrown into prison cells, but it was a lot of fun in my opinion, even if there wasn't any killing to be done. Belarus stuck with me during the fighting, and my female counterpart was always close by as well, although she preferred to do battle alone.
China, Vietnam and North Korea had teamed up and were throwing down countries in the Far East left right and center. It was going pretty sweet, and we had made enormous progress before anyone even realized what was happening.
Now they saw the error of their ways. Now they saw that I was truly a nation, that I was the great and powerful Ostrogot! And I would forever brand my name into their skins, so that they would remember, who defeated them.
He pauses in his story.
"That sounds like a very good ending, doesn't it? Well, at least for me it does, being ruler of the world at that moment and everything. Alas…" he takes a sip of Vodka from the bottle again "there is more to be told than that."
Footsteps are heard and moments later, Ostrogot's female version appears in the doorway to the room.
"Who are yu talking to, brother?"
He turns his head in her direction.
"Just guest, sister" he says, once again in a Russian accent.
"Vell, make sure yu hurry. Belarus has been bothering me for over an hour, vanting me to tell yu that yu should go to bed."
He sighs.
"Tell her dat I vill be right zere, I only have to finish story, da?"
"Da." She replies grudgingly, and walks away.
He turns his head back to its original position.
"Yes, that's her all right" he says in his normal voice again "Beautiful, isn't she? And she has a very nice pair of-"
He takes another gulp of Vodka.
"-eyes. Just like mine, wouldn't you agree? Oh, and we're 'siblings' officially. Twins. Even though nothing could be further from the truth. No one dares say something to the contrary however."
He pauses for a minute to think, in which a cat with fur the color of hay, slinks into the room, prowls around his feet, and then lies down on the carpet.
"Where was I? Ah, yes, the story. Well everything was going very, very well, and then…and then…" he smiles "things got a lot more interesting."
Our streak had to end some day, sometime our enemies had to band together and try to stand against us. Luckily we saw them coming. Who finally showed up to stand in our way wasn't surprising at all. The old allies were back together, with the obvious exception of Russia and China. America, Britain and France had been joined by Japan, Germany, Italy, Spain and finally Prussia. It was odd, I had expected more of the world to face us, but apparently they didn't. Okay, we may have had the Scandinavian countries all locked up, and most of the rest of the world under our control, but still…some wanted to stay neutral, naturally. Belgium, Netherlands and Switzerland. I wondered what we would do with them…
In any case, we suddenly found ourselves facing the enemy alliance, which I will just call 'Allies' for simplicity. We ourselves had all gathered together, all being 'Soviets'. The battlefield was…a field, literally. I can't remember where, but that was unimportant anyway. We all had our troops behind us, and even though they weren't many, it was still very impressive to me.
The field was not even particularly large; we were barely fifty meters apart. Again, if you're not familiar with metrics, look it up. Russians use them as well. I could tell that this was not going to be a battle of tactical finesse, far from it. I suspected that we were just going to throw everything we had at each other, and I wasn't very fond of that. Don't' get me wrong, we were well armed, but so were the Allies.
England had brought a pair of attack helicopters, France jeeps, Germany a small squad of tanks. America had brought air superiority to the Allies with planes that I doubted Cuba's Soviet-Era MIGs could compete with. Spain and Japan had some infantry. Prussia and Italy had both brought close to nothing, Prussia because 'his awesomeness was the greatest weapon of all' and Italy because he was a coward, simply put. He did have a white flag ready for every Allied country. That must have been a great morale boost.
We were more to be sure, going with the old Soviet motto of 'Mass has its own class', but the Allies were better equipped. As long as things didn't go nuclear, I was sure that there was a way we could win. Meanwhile I was convinced that I was a legitimate nation; there was no way that I could die. But on the other hand, a nuclear bomb or two could effectively destroy a nation's vital functions, so…well, at least I hoped that no one would go for MY vital regions…but wait a second…technically, I didn't have any. I didn't know whether I should rejoice in my invincibility, or cry at the fact that I was missing a very important part of my nation-ness, and an even more important part of my manliness if I'd interpreted the term correctly.
I was getting distracted by things that were not relevant to the destruction of the Allies, probably due to nerves.
There was sure to be some banter in the beginning, coming mostly from the Allied side. They did have the two nations on their side that certainly like to talk most about being victors. Prussia and America.
I was not to be disappointed, as after a few minutes of watching and waiting, contemplating each other, America stepped out of the line, clutching an American flag on a pole that he'd brought with him for some reason, no doubt as a prop for the extensive speech he was about to give us.
There was no wind however, so the flag hung down limply to one side. I smirked at this. To me, it was symbolic.
Then he began to speak.
"My fellow Allies!" he addressed the nations behind him "I have long feared that this day would come on which our freedom would be endangered! I told you again and again that this might happen, that we had to protect our freedom! And you told me that I was wrong. Nevertheless I prepared for this event! And now that the day is here where our freedom is threatened, I am ready to face it!"
To me it sounded like the load of trash that was to be expected from America. Lots of self-praise and always the mention of 'freedom' in almost every sentence, as if he considered his audience to be too stupid for anything else, which for all I knew he probably did. It did not matter however, the message was clear, and the Allies, although they had to listen to America's incredibly horrible speech, didn't seem to waver in their resolve. I knew however that some of the nations would be happy to hang back while the others did the work for them, and that some nations would be ready to take credit for victories that weren't theirs.
I was not going to let it come that for however.
None of us Soviets wasted much time on speeches. We didn't need any more inspiration than we already had.
America had clearly expected someone of us to take the word, but when none did, he ended up looking rather foolish, holding the pole with the limp flag in his one hand.
There was nothing else for it.
"Attack!" he yelled, and as one, the entire army started forward, moving in one giant mass. Tanks rumbling, the blades of helicopters whirring, jeeps rolling at fast speed, closing in on our line quickly.
I stood, along with the rest of the Soviets, strong and firm. My aura erupted around me, and so did Belarus' next to me and Russia's further down the line.
I knew that this was where it all ended, and I was the one that would.
I grabbed the standard from an officer of my infantry, depicting a red and black version of the Soviet flag, took it in my hand, and walked forward to meet them.
A battle like this would rip the earth apart for sure, completely change it. I didn't want that. I hated change. All of us Soviets did. It's who we were. And this needed to be ended, but how? Well, to a history nerd like I was, the solution was all too simple.
I planted the standard firmly into the ground. A sudden wind picked up and made it flutter slightly, infused with my aura. I held out ma hand to the advancing enemy that was almost upon me.
"Stop!" I commanded.
And miraculously, they did, all at once, with a great amount of screeching, clanking and whirring, just two meters in front of me, the entire line.
"Stop." I said again "Dere is no need for dis."
"Huh?" America said, completely baffled.
"I only vant to make peace." I said.
I couldn't see Russia at that very moment as he was behind me, but if I could have, I would have seen him smile his most satisfied grin yet.