Decisions

The wind carried the screams of the people from the little village below. She stood on the high cliff top, watching as it burned in the distance, its people being slaughtered. They'd done nothing, just like countless villages before them. It didn't matter. They were going to be added to the growing list of casualties in Thedas.

She'd been in the village, restocking when everything began. Like so many towns before them, apostates had hid among the crowds , trying to find refuge from a war they didn't want to fight. But eventually word had spread to nearby templars who declared themselves "honor bound" to find and eliminate them all…along with anyone that may be an abomination. They'd cling to that logic and their fear of blood magic as an excuse to slay anyone who wasn't one of them. Of course then the mages, pushed into a corner, would fight back, wild with fear.

Hawke had watched a young girl, a gentle scholar from the circle was pushed to blood magic to defend herself and her child brother The templars were going to spear them both; the child hadn't even been a mage. She was one of many pushed into the arms of demons who promised to make them stronger.

Then they'd begun killing the villagers too. The young mage laughed and set her own brother aflame.

Hawke clenched her fist tight at her sides. Her stomach churned as she listened to the screams grow quieter and fewer. So much life stolen, and it all fell on her. It was her fault.

She'd freed the mages of Kirkwall. Told them to run for their lives and set off a chain reaction. Despite what her intentions were, and regardless of the circles innocence, her actions that day had been tied to Anders' decimation of the Chantry. The mages had escaped the same day another had terrorized the city and the knight commander had been executed. In the eyes of templars and many of Thedas, it was all connected and labeled the beginning of the Mage rebellion.

The beginnings of blood spill and war throughout the land. Would it have turned out the same if she would've let the rite of annulment claim the Kirkwall circle? Were all these lives worth the handful of mages she'd helped escape?

She looked down at her hands and they were stained deep crimson.

"Hawke. We should move out." A hand landed on her shoulder and startled her from her thoughts. She looked over her shoulder at Fenris who stood with the packs of their small camp on this back. He'd managed to pack everything alone while she'd stood staring, lost in her thoughts. She looked down at her hands. Clean.

She sighed and shook her head. "I'm sorry…I shouldn't have helped. Ah! I-I mean I should've helped you pack." She groaned, rubbing her head, before going to sit on a log near the embers of their snuffed fire.

The elf sighed and looked at her. He'd watched as the world around her changed. She had changed with it, growing more withdrawn as time went on.

"Whoever, or whatever is left from that village will be making its way here soon. We need to move on." He repeated.

"Yes." She agreed, resting her face in her hands, making no move to leave. "Fenris…"

She grew quiet as the wind whistled through the trees. The chaotic sounds of the village had disappeared, but black smoke continued to pour into the sky.

"It'd be better if we parted ways from here on." She spoke into her hands.

His eyes widened and he watched her, waiting for her to continue. She didn't.

Her grimaced, and his heart hammered. Whatever she was thinking, was wrong and he wasn't going anywhere.

"And then what?" He asked, not even questioning her reasoning. He didn't care for it.

She looked to him, feeling tired and then looked to her feet. "You can start a new life somewhere. Free of…this." she waved her hand in the direction of the smoke. "I…I did this and I'll spend the rest of my life dealing with it or running from it."

"And I'll be in your way?" He snarled, watching her through his hair. After everything they'd been through…and everything he'd said, how could she be so stupid. He felt angry…but he'd left her once. He had no right.

Hawke shook her head and rubbed her arms. "You know that's not true. This is…this war has nothing to do with you Fenris. It's been years and the killing hasn't stopped. Not only are they looking for me, I'm a known mage now. But you don't have magic and you're not sworn to the order, you're not involved. Denarius is dead and you have no reason to run. I don't know why you've chosen to this far."

"You don't know?" He laughed as if he too were suddenly tired. "The woman I love is a mage. Maybe you've met her?" He declared stepping toward her. "Magic runs in her veins and the veins of her family. Any children we bare might…" he squatted, closing his eyes tight. He pressed his forehead to hers.

Children? She thought wide eyed, watching Fenris inhale deeply through his nose as whatever possibility he was considering played out in his mind. He'd thought of having children with her?

She could almost see it. A little girl who looked like Bethany with his green eyes, accidentally sneezing a fireball. She could also see the shadow of a Templar behind her. Hawke's heart raced.

Fenris' eyes opened and he held her gaze with a protective fierceness. "I am very much involved. I've made my choice, and if I could go back, I'd make the same ones. Despite how you feel about this aftermath, you would too. So stop this regret and get up." He ordered, standing, pulling her to her feet.

She swallowed at the knot in her throat a few times but knew her voice would fail her. She closed her eyes and nodded, feeling traitor tears slide from her lashes.

Fenris ran his thumbs over her cheeks, feeling something in him soften whenever he saw the strong woman cry. "Now lets go." He held her wrist and led the way into the mountains.