A/N

Bleh, I hate being sick! But it gave me time to write so that's one plus! I'M RUNNING OUT OF LYRICS FOR THE CHAPTER TITLES! I'm also watching Pacific Rim and someone is getting eaten as I speak... I mean type... Ever read Ender's Game? If you have, then you'll know what I mean when I say THAT'S ALMOST AS BAD AS DYING BY GETTING KICKED IN THE CROTCH!

Every single one of you, go read Ender's Game.

Also, I just ruined this chapter with my A/N.

Yojne!

One Day They'll See

I walk through the front door of my house and step into the living room. The t.v. is on, and my mom is asleep on the couch, probably passed out from how much alcohol she consumed today, same as always. No matter how hard I try to forget, I can still feel the mark from the slap she gave me. You can't see it on the outside, it has long since faded away. But I can feel it inside my heart.

I lost my mom.

I walk upstairs, past my parents empty bedroom. My dad is probably out somewhere, doing things he shouldn't with another woman when he could be here, trying to pick up the pieces of my mothers heart. Or maybe mine. He was never here for any of us when we needed it. I don't even remember the last time he asked me how I was. I wonder what I would have answered if he had.

I lost my dad.

I walk past my brothers room. He says he is here for me, but he is not. I realize that now. If he was here, he would have tried to save me from everything that has happened. He's probably out smoking with Kankuro and Kin, instead of leaving me alone with my broken mother in a house full of bad memories. He doesn't even try to make me eat anymore, he just assumes I have been.

I lost my brother.

I walk into my room, then up to my bedside table. I look at the small picture frame next to my alarm clock. In the picture, Neji and Gaara are standing next to each other and I'm behind them, hugging them. Neji is probably with Elsie, doing things it hurts to think about, and Gaara is probably at home, not caring. Why did I think they ever cared?

I lost my friends.

I pick up the picture frame and throw it against the wall as hard as I can, watching as the wood cracks and the glass shatters. I pause a moment to make sure mom hasn't woken up from the noise. Then I bend down and pick up the picture, glass shards getting caught on my hand. I see little beads of blood slowly appearing where I got cut, but I don't care. I look at the picture, at our happy, smiling doll faces.

Without emotion, I rip it in half, crumple the pieces up, and throw it in the garbage.

I realize now, what alone is. Alone is being in a room full of people, knowing none of them truly care about you. Alone is having someone next to you, and while they are in your heart, you're not in theirs. Alone is looking around and knowing that things are only going to get worse, and no one is trying to stop it. They simply walk in to your life and walk out, leaving you as if you are nothing to them.

Alone hurts.

I calmly leave my room and climb the stairs to the attic. I slowly walk to my dollhouse, as if my legs are made of lead. I don't want to walk anymore. Maybe I can stop walking the same way I stopped eating. I can simply sit here with my dolls and refuse to leave. They can drag me out, but I swear I will leave kicking and screaming.

I'm going crazy.

I am crazy.

I lean down and look inside the small house. The sister doll is sitting on her bed, alone in her bedroom while everyone else is in different rooms. Naruto doll is looking under his mattress for something. Sakura doll is near the liquor cabinet. Sasuke doll is in the front hall, about to walk out the door. Kyarra dolls face is in her hands, as if she is crying. I pull them away.

She looks sad.
She looks lonely.
She looks too skinny.
She looks like me.

Crazy Kyarra sits on the floor,
What is she supposed to feel?
She is playing with her dolls,
Pretending that they are real.

I almost laugh at my little poem. Crazy Kyarra, that's what they will call me. I'm getting crazier by the second. I am all alone, what do I have left to hold on to?

Alone.

Alone.

Alone.

The word echos through my head, it bounces around and stabs at my heart.

I lost my life.

The room spins around me. I really must eat something before I black out. I'm not used to running so far while eating so little. Maybe one day people will see what is happening to me.

I stand and walk downstairs to the kitchen, where I eat a piece of lettuce and drink a tall glass of water. My mother is still sleeping. I'm beginning to wonder what can wake her up from her alcohol-induced sleep. Maybe sleeping is better for her anyways. Now I know that the real nightmares happen when you are awake.

I wonder if I will ever be whole again.

Ending note!

Haha... I'm depressing, aren't I ^_^ But you love me anyways! (...) WHAT NOW? (Oh Kyarra, if only there was someone out there who loved you.) SHUT UP YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO QUOTE FROZEN! OBSESSING OVER DISNEY MOVIES IS MY THING! (I thought obsession over Naruto was your thing.) SHUT UP! I AM A MULIT-FANDOM MEMBER!

HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY!

~Kyarra-Chan (^.~)