The Hands of the Sisters

Reconciliation

She knocked on my door. It was the first sign I had that not all was well in Bella's already muddled head.

I looked at Draco, seated cross-legged on my bed. He nodded.

"Come in," I called. She blew through my door winded and wide-eyed.

"You wretched bitch," she spat. "How dare you?"

Draco rose. I felt him behind me.

"Both of you!" Bella pointed a shaking finger. "You leave your sister wandless and unconscious! Knowing that the Dark Lord was coming!" She pulled at a fistful of her own hair. "Do you know what he did?" She paced. I noticed an occasional tremble in her arms. "He was so…so angry…"

She braced both hands against the wall beside my lavatory. Sobs wracked her emaciated frame. "We ran, you know…like cowards. We all just…ran…" She crumpled to the floor.

Cautiously, I approached her. "Bella."

"He killed so many." She looked up at me. Her left eye was bright with burst blood vessels. "He would have killed me, Cissy."

I kicked her hand away from my ankle. "Is Lucius dead?"

She shook her head. "He's hiding, I think." She worried her bottom lip with her fingers. "I think…" Then she grasped my skirt suddenly. "How?" Her eyes were fanatical. "How did you do it? With no wand? Show me." I staggered away from her. "Show me, Cissy!" Her cry was desperate.

"I don't know!" I yelled at her. Draco pulled me to his chest, soothing me with whispers. "I feel it! To protect my son, myself… I feel it, Bella." I pointed my own shaking finger. "And you've forgotten how to feel!"

"Mother." I shrugged away from Draco, stood over my stymied sister. "From now on, you keep away from me, Bella. And from Draco. You and your psychopathic master both."

"He'll kill you, you fool," she hissed. "Hearing you talk this way…"

"What have I to lose? You told me once I would fight my own battles, sister. And now I am. The side I'm on is my own – and my son's. I will do whatever is necessary to keep him alive."

Bella lashed out at me bare-handed, screeching. "How dare you! You would betray us all? When the Final Battle comes and Potter is before him – "

"I never said I would betray you." I dropped to my knees to face her, grappled till I secured her wrists tightly in my hands. "I simply fight for myself now." I looked to my son. "And so does Draco. We will do what it takes to survive…and what is right."

"We shall see." Bella licked her chapped lips. Her eyes flicked to Draco. "We're confined here, now. To the manor. And I need a wand. Lucius and I both…" She broke down again.

I rose stiffly and approached my wardrobe. The box I produced from my stocking drawer contained two wands. I offered both to Bella. "This one is mother's," I said. "And this one is Aunt Laguena's." I thrust the second at her. She deserved it.

She clamored to her feet and snatched the swishy walnut from my hand. "And Draco?"

"Draco has my wand."

"Cissy, you can't – "

"I can do what I want!" I held out the ash wand. "Give this one to Lucius."

Bella turned from me, opened the door. "You give it to him." She gave Draco a withering glare. "He's your husband, Nar-cis-sah." The door slammed behind her.

Draco sighed. "Mother…she's right. You need your wand."

"No, I don't." I folded his fingers around the hilt of my ebony masterpiece. "It will…serve you well. You'll need it soon."

He nodded solemnly, darkness edging his features. "Will you see father, then?" I nodded. His face went even stonier. "Will you come back here tonight?"

My eyes searched his. A boy should not be jealous of his own father. What have I done? But I nodded. "Of course, Draco."

The manor's halls were quiet and dark. I smelled flesh and iron from downstairs. I didn't want to know. Lucius was where I suspected he would be, leaning defeated on the desk in his study. I stared at him through the doors for a moment.

In the moonlight, his profile was sharp, chin and nose almost cutting. He'd lost so much weight. His hair hung in oily strips, creating negative spaces above his drooping shoulders. As my eyes adjusted to the dimness, I saw he was expressionless.

"Lucius." I pronounced it Loo-cee-us. Just his head turned.

"Narcissa."

I entered the room holding the wand hilt to him. "What is this?"

"It was mother's," I explained. "Keep it hidden on you."

Lucius shook his head. "I don't think he wants me to have – "

"Don't be stupid!" I snapped. "Take it! If he doesn't kill you, one of the others will try."

He took the wand, slid it into his sleeve. "Are you alright?"

"No," I answered honestly.

He chuffed ruefully. "And Draco?"

"He will be fine." I started to leave. There was nothing more to say.

"Narcissa." He caught hold of my elbow. I hadn't heard him move. "Can you remember when we were happy?"

I pulled away. "I can't remember when I was not afraid, Lucius!"

He reached for me again, desperate. "You hate me now."

"Yes!" I shoved his hands away. "Don't touch me! Never again."

He stumbled into the doorframe. "I'm sorry," he gasped. "I'm…I'm so sorry."

I left him in his misery, happy to scurry back to my familiar wards and the warmth of my son's arms. "Mother," Draco murmured in my hair. "You're upset. I should have gone to father." His fingers were unhooking the back of my dress. I suddenly wanted to slap him.

"Don't be ridiculous," I said. "He's my husband." Draco's fingers, slipping up and down my bared spine, froze.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Stop apologizing!" I shoved him to the bed. He stumbled half onto it. "I'm sick of hearing apologies. And you owe me none, so shut up." I stripped off my dress. Draco looked at me with a mixture of fear and anticipation. "Undress," I snapped.

He did.

I pressed him into the mattress. "I know it shall end soon," I said, kissing him. "And whether for good or bad, I just want to know I did what was right." His hands felt so good caressing my sides. My throat threatened to close. "I want to know that I tried, Draco. I want to know you lived, that someone lived because of me!"

"Mother." He nuzzled my neck, kissed my jaw.

I straddled him urgently, took his hardness into my hand. "I want to know that for every death I've witnessed there are a hundred still alive." I wasn't quite wet. But the burn of him entering me was galvanizing. Tears squeezed from my eyes and Draco swiped at them. "I want to know life in case death takes me!"

He suddenly wrapped me in a tight embrace and rolled me beneath him. "Then we do what's right," he whispered. His thrusts were quick and shallow, strumming the chord he'd learned. I hummed. "And we live while we can."

We lived in the moments of pleasure before the battle; the Dark Lord lived in the moments of agony. Captives came and went from my cellars, some murdered, some tortured to oblivion. Some I knew, some I knew not. I watched Bella's madness flower and wither and flower again, while Lucius simply withered.

On May first, Draco and I were jarred from our bed-haven by screaming from downstairs. Some miserable creature was dying in a fury. We rushed into clothes and down the stairs. Lucius met us on the landing, grabbing our arms and shaking his head. "Don't," he muttered. "He's angry."

I heard Bella screaming and sobbing in the drawing room. "What's happened?" I asked.

"Gringott's was breached today. Bella's vault…something was stolen…something important." He shook his head, winced in that peculiar tic he'd developed.

"What was stolen?" Draco was trying to peer around his father's shoulder.

"I don't know." Lucius pushed at us. "Go. Go!"

I heard the zing of magic, Bella's shouts for mercy. I smelled ozone and fear. I gripped Lucius' shoulder, tried to see inside the drawing room. Draco wrenched me away by the hand. "Come, mother. Upstairs." I looked back once more on the stairs to see Lucius watching us climb. When he met my eyes, he looked away, and walked calmly into the drawing room.

Bella came to my room later and knocked timidly. I was surprised to see her. "Sister." She looked a bit dazed. "Are you…are you alright, Bella?"

"Something is happening," she answered. "Perhaps tonight. He believes Potter will go back to Hogwarts."

I glanced at Draco.

"Cissy?" She meandered to my vanity, straddled the cushioned bench.

"Yes, Bella?"

"Sit." She patted the bench across from her. "Let me brush your hair." Were there tears in her eyes?

"Mum?" Draco was nervous. I calmed him with a raised hand.

"Go to your room for a bit, son. Please." He touched the small of my back as he left, cast a suspicious look at Bella. "I'll come to you soon." He nodded.

"Good-bye, little dragon," Bella sang very softly. She didn't look at him, but picked at the brocade beneath her.

Draco paused. "Good-bye, Auntie Bella." At the snick of the door closing, I sat before Bella and gave her my back in a gesture of trust. I hoped I wasn't being a fool.

She scooted a little closer. "Your hairs grown so long, Cissy. Will you keep it this way?"

"Perhaps." The brush felt nice, and she tugged at the ends in that soothing way she knew.

"It's silky still." She smoothed it. I'd never felt such gentleness from her hands, such grace. She reached onto my vanity and lifted an ornate onyx hair clip. Soon, my hair was secured away from my face, falling in a shining sheet down my back. "Very pretty." Her voice was distant and sweet.

"Thank you, Bella." I turned my head to look at her. She was reaching into a drawer.

"Turn around." She made a twirling gesture and smiled. "Let me paint your nails."

I shifted per her request, worry creasing my forehead. "Have we time, sister?"

She met my eyes with startling clarity in her own. "Yes, there's time, Cissy." She held up a bottle or bright red varnish. "There's always time." Her wand flicked toward the wireless, and she hummed while she painted. I detected a very slight tremble in her usually sure hands.

A wand wave over my fingers dried the varnish instantly. The red was almost garish. "Lovely," I whispered.

"It will be so different after tonight, Cissy." Bella tilted my chin up to face her. "We will be so perfect together. So powerful."

I nodded. "Yes, Belle." I took her hand in mine. I thought of Bella as a girl; saw her moving down the hall of our girlhood home, giggling, curls bouncing; I saw her waving at me from the Hogwarts Express, tossing me a chocolate frog; I saw her on her wedding day – the last time she'd been a true, inarguable beauty – in yards of silver silk, wreathed with white gardenias. I could almost smell the blossoms… "Yes, Belle." My own tears threatened.

She leaned forward. I didn't stop her – just closed my eyes. The tears spilled over, hot and cooling as they raced down my face.

Her lips were full and pouty pressed to mine. I let the feeling sink deeply, imprint on my soul. I memorized the touch. I wanted to recall it like the smell of gardenias. I wanted to reconcile my Bella with the creature that had tormented me so recently. I wanted to love my sister again…because somehow I knew this would be my last chance.

Her other hand scrambled for mine on the bench. I twined our fingers together. Our hands were ribbons tying. She placed one of mine over her heart. I felt the organ beating strongly beneath taut leather, and I returned the gesture.

Bella broke the kiss suddenly. She pulled away and slid her hands from mine. "You should dress," she said, rising.

I wiped my tears and controlled the quaver in my voice. I was dressed already… "Dress for what, sister?"

She looked at me again with that strange calm. "For war." And she left my room. I stared at the empty space before me, at the red varnish on my nails. I looked in my mirror and was struck by how pretty I was. And she wanted me to dress for war?

But war came. The Death Eaters converged first on the manor. The foyer and drawing room were thick with robes and masked faces. I sought out my son and found him near his father. "Draco!" He pulled me aside.

"I'm to look for Potter," he said quickly. "In the castle."

I looked into his silver grey eyes, saw the steel there. "Of course," I replied, grasping his shoulders. In the background, I heard Bella's screaming laugh and fanatical screechings. Not caring in the least who saw, I hugged my son. He hugged me back, but stiffly. "I love you."

"I love you, too." He pressed a cloaked kiss to my forehead. "I'll be fine."

"Narcissa!" Lucius called. Draco stepped away, and I looked at my husband. "You'll wait in the forest with a clutch of others. If Potter comes there, we'll be informed immediately." I nodded, stepped out of time. The doors flung open and I heard the smoky departures of Riddle's followers.

My son met me eyes one last time as he stepped through the doors. I blinked, and he'd apparated. Then my husband's hands were on me. "Come," he said. "I'll side-along with you to the forest." I was navigated through the masses and outside.

"He'll be alright, won't he?" I asked Lucius.

He nodded tightly. "Hold on."

I stumbled when we touched down on the uneven ground. Other pops and hisses sounded around us. Lucius steadied me, then stepped away. "I'll be back," he said.

"Lucius!" But he popped away. I was surrounded by strangers in silver faces…and the hours of waiting descended.

I didn't see the shields surrounding Hogwarts fall. I'm glad I didn't. My gut was a torrent of worry and despair as it was. The sounds of battle echoed throughout the cave behind us. I lingered on the outskirts of the group, near the trail that led out of the forest. I longed to follow that trail, to find my way to my son, to take him away…

Then I heard pops and activity. I rushed back to the camp. Lucius had returned with several others. He saw me above several heads and made his way to me. "The Dark Lord is coming. He's sent Potter an ultimatum and expects the boy to come."

"And if he doesn't?"

"He must!" Lucius ran a hand nervously through his hair.

"And Draco? Have you seen him?" Lucius shook his head impatiently, turned from me. I grabbed him, desperate for any word. "What about Severus? Perhaps he's seen – "

"Severus is dead." Lucius moved away again.

My hands fell limp at my sides. I chilled, then numbed. Severus was dead… I saw his eyes, his brown eyes warm with fire-flecks. Somewhere, they were dark and empty now. His hands that had been so gentle, so hesitant and curious on my body were cold and curled.

I covered my mouth on a choking sob and closed my eyes. I hoped he hadn't suffered. A crowd pressed in on me. I breathed deeply and followed the surge. The Dark Lord was among us. Bella clung to him like a shadow. They'd brought the giant.

I waited by Lucius for the Potter boy to come. I thought of my son, of Severus. I watched Bella bend and cower before the manic whim of her master. When the boy finally appeared, I was both relieved and terrified.

When the Killing Curse was cast, I curled into Lucius' shoulder to hide my fear. He did not embrace me. I was still hiding my face when Voldemort's stinging hex hit my arse. "Ouch!" I cried, turning. Nervous, muted laughter rippled through the clutch of murderers.

Riddle pointed at the boy. Lucius pushed me forward. Lips were moving and there were voices, but they all bled together and drowned in the sound of rushing seawater. I staggered toward the boy, nearly tripping over the hem of my long skirt. I was cold despite my quilted frock coat. I rubbed my fingers together as I knelt over him.

This is Harry Potter. My heart hammered hard against my ribcage. One hand brushed against soft, ruffled hair. The other reached for his chest. I couldn't feel a thing through his layered shirts, so I scrambled underneath it.

He was warm. His heart…his heart beat beneath my palm. It beat strongly. The sound of rushing water abated. All I heard was the quiet rustle of anxious strangers behind me, and the chirps and cracks of the forest.

I thought of my own heart beating as if it wanted to stop, of my son and Severus and the sacrifices made by so many this night. I remembered Draco's heart beating against mine, our promises to live, to do the right thing. The right thing.

Curious gazes settled heavier on my back. I shook them off. Damned if I do and damned if I don't…

"Is he alive? Draco? Is he alive?" I hoped he heard me.

A nearly imperceptible breath, motion of the lips. "Yes."

Yes. I rose before anyone else could approach. "He's dead!" This time, my voice rang out clearly. The victorious roar deafened me, and again I was swept into a crowd. This time, I was moving through them like liquid. I needed to be at Hogwarts.

"Narcissa!" I glanced back. My husband caught up to me. "What are you doing? Stop."

I whirled to face him, felt the magic begin to pulse in my belly. "If I've ever meant a damned thing to you at all you'll come with me to find your son. He's alive."

"How do you know that?"

I twisted away from him. "I know. And we have to find him and leave." Because gods help us when riddle learns Potter is still alive…and gods help Potter.

Lucius didn't question further, and soon we were racing through the devastated castle crying our son's name. At the entrance to the dungeons, I pushed Lucius away. "Split up," I said. "I'll look in the dorms. You go up."

Fighting erupted and I heard heavy blasts. Lucius took off toward the madness and I rushed down the stairs to the Slytherin dungeons. As I rounded a curve, I collided with my son. "Draco!"

He stared at me as if in disbelief. "Mother!" I braced against the wall when he swept me into his arms. "I've checked. All the Slytherins are out of the dorms. They were locked in. Is Potter…"

I touched a streak of blood on his cheek. "He's alive. We have to go."

"But – "

"Draco, please!" I pulled his hands to my lips. "Please!"

He sighed and kissed me. "Let's go, then." We rushed from the castle, past duels and falling corpses. "Where's father?" He slowed and looked back.

"I don't know." I tugged harder on his hand. I don't care. Sun and smoke welcomed us.

"Mother." He tugged harder on my hand. I turned to him.

"What?"

"We can't leave. We can't just run." He looked back to the castle, where a great glow of green magic erupted. "I have to see this through. We have to do the right thing." He started back. I stared after him, wringing my hands. "Come with me!" He shouted over his shoulder, slowing. I rushed to catch up to him.

"Narcissa! Draco!"

It was Lucius calling for us. Draco and I looked at each other in surprise and followed the sound of his voice. He saw us approaching the main entrance and met us. He took Draco's shoulder in one hand and my face in the other. "He's dead."

"What?" I pawed his grimy hand from my face. Panic tightened like a fist on my throat. "Who is dead?"

"The Dark Lord." His eyes burned into mine. "It seems…it seems Potter wasn't dead, after all." I raised my chin defiantly. "We should go now."

"We're staying," Draco said. I nodded and brushed past Lucius. He followed us into the Great Hall.

I froze in the doorway, steadied by my son. The bodies…they were children. I clutched at the wall. "Come on, mum. Perhaps we can help." But I couldn't even stand. I tugged Draco onto the nearest bench beside me. He cradled me. I felt Lucius' arms surround us both.

"Bella!" I suddenly remembered her.

Lucius' hand tightened on my shoulder. I looked up at him. He shook his head. Draco pulled me to his chest. "It's all right, mum. It's all right."

And there it was – directly beneath my ear: my son's heartbeat, strong and steady. I was numb to the world and felt hateful stares heating me. But it was all right.

Thump thump. Thump thump.

It's all right…

AN: Huge thanks to all of you who've read, reviewed and stuck with this story from beginning to here. There's an epilogue, but nothing too heavy. And thanks for forgiving all my muddled verses: movieverse, bookverse and . I picked and chose. Special thanks to the dragon...for unending patience and listening to all my Bella-bitching.