Anniversary
Author's Note! (Slightly important if you want an explanation for my Hiatus)
Wow! I'm back, and it wasn't as long as I thought. (Been a little over three months but what do you care? Better than a year, right?) I just needed to think about this story very carefully and finally figured out what was wrong. I had looked at my original plans for this story and realized that the characters had, well, run away with the story. Yeah, sometimes the characters just up and change everything, and then it gets all messed up and confusing and makes my life terrible! It worked fine for Saving Axel, but apparently not for the sequel (o_0).Still, after listening to my beta, I wrote another story that I won't be posting until I finish this, and really thought about what I wanted. I changed a ton of what I had originally planned for this chapter and will be a ton less corny than the actual, original idea. Although, I bet my beta and my researcher (you know who you are ;) ) laugh at the thought of me being uncorny, but believe me, I'm serious. I thank you tremendously if you are actually reading my rant because I know no one ever does, but I just wanted to explain myself.
*sigh*
Okay, with that out of the way I promise you all I officially have the story under control again without having to go back and edit the story. I'm sure SBL is dancing around with joy for not having more than this to go over. I swear no other projects will get in the way until this is finished. My personal policy: finish a story before starting another. I'm sure I've all told you this before, but you are the best and motivated me to tackle this problem head on! Now, without further delay for those actually reading this, enjoy the long awaited chapter 10.
-DivineSoul
Saving Roxas
Chapter 10: I Love Him
Axel's POV
"See ya, Axel!" a coworker of mine called as he left the small pizza parlor where I worked. The place actually belongs to Marluxia because his dad had retired two years ago. Marluxia originally didn't want me coming in today considering how he still thought my head was a total mess regarding all that has happened this month. I'm just impressed none of my friends have sent me to a shrink, but if anything was wrong with my head, I'm sure I could diagnose it myself. I scrubbed the table in front of me with a wet washcloth and listened to the radio still playing and was glad I came in to work. It was clearly better than sitting at home, wallowing in self pity. I'd even thought about moving back in with my parents until I felt less…lonely, for lack of a better word.
"Hey, Axel." I looked up and spotted Larxene standing by the door, pulling her jacket on. "Your shift ended forty minutes ago," she pointed out, and I nodded my understanding.
"Just trying to help Marly out a bit," I easily lied. One would think it was a crime how easily it came, but I spent the better part of my life perfecting the art.
"Okay. I gotta pick your daughter up from a friend's house," she explained. I paused mid-stroke and turned to face Larxene fully.
"How is she…Xion that is?" I barely even managed to say her name. Memories of our argument flooded through my mind, and it made me feel sick.
"She's fine…caught up in school pretty quick but I think she misses you," Larxene said quietly. I snorted unintentionally, but went with it, turning my back to the blond.
"Doubt it. She probably only misses her room," I pointed out. I expected Larxene to fire back with something else, but she remained silent. I heard the bell on the door, signifying her departure, and I had to sit in a chair for a moment. I wondered how Xion took the news of Reno's kidnapping. Does she even care about him, since she really hates me? What am I saying? Of course she'll care! Rufus as my witness, staying mad at Reno is impossible, especially since it was entirely my fault. She's probably better off with Larxene and Marluxia anyway. I wasn't exactly a model father, just ask anyone.
"Axel?" I glanced up when Marluxia entered the room. "The hell are you still doing here?" he questioned as he began to put the chairs upside down on top of the tables. I finished wiping the table and began to help him.
"I thought since I had nothing better to do, I'd help out here," I said, putting a chair on the table. "Do you not want me here?" I questioned, and Marluxia waved my comment off.
"It's not that. I enjoy the help, but…" he trailed off, placing a hand on my shoulder from across the table. "But I'm not paying you overtime, Ax," he said, and we both began to laugh. We finished up quickly, and I placed the rag in Marluxia's laundry bag and yawned. "Not sleeping well?" he questioned.
"It's not that I can't sleep well, I just…haven't been sleeping," I finished awkwardly. He sent me a calculating look. "Hey, pal, don't think too much, you might hurt yourself," I joked, and he playfully shoved me.
"Asshole," he said shortly. "For that comment, you do the laundry," he said as he pointed to the large bag beside him, and I snorted.
"Hell no." I waved him off and hefted the bag to help him get the bag and some other things to his car. "Want me to lock up?" I offered as Marluxia came back from the restaurant with his coat in hand.
"Could you? I gotta stop at the Laundromat and hopefully get back in time for dinner," he said, tossing me the key ring. "Just come on the bright so I can get them back, okay?" he mentioned, and I nodded as he shut the door of his car, rolling the window down. "Check and lock the register, make sure everything's off, and…y'know," he finished as he shook his head and rolled the window up. I tapped the top of his car and began to walk back toward the establishment with the keys in hand. I finished with washing the counter down and went into the back and wiped things in the kitchen down, taking down another hour bringing it to nine o'clock. I counted the money in the register quietly, listening to the music still playing when my phone rang.
"Who the…" I trailed off when I saw it was Marluxia calling me. "Hello?" I questioned.
"Dude!" Marluxia started off excitedly, "I just got off the phone with the head of Sure for Life insurance agency, and he wants to have his daughter's engagement party at the shop! Can you believe it?" he questioned. I paused, wondering why that insurance agency was sounding familiar…I was over thinking again. I'd probably seen commercials for them a lot.
"Wow…that's great. When's the party?" I questioned.
"End of the week, and I need to make sure I have the best of the best working that night. You in?" he questioned. I pulled out the register drawer and placed it on the counter.
"Totally, Marly," I agreed. "This is a big deal, isn't it?"
"Great! Ah, shit, I gotta go! Bye!" he called into the phone before ending the connection. I set the phone on the counter and moved to the safe in the office. I knew the combination since I used to do clean up for the register back in high school. I locked the drawer and placed it in the safe and shut the door. I leaned back onto the counter. I didn't specifically want to go home just yet, but there was nothing else for me to do here. I glanced around, wondering if I should maybe scrub the floor, but I didn't really have the energy, so I decided to kill the radio, lock up, and head home.
It was lonely and cold at home, not to mention empty. Normally, I could expect Reno to come over if I was this lonely and messed up, but since he was gone…it was impossible. When I got there, I turned on every light in the place and settled down with a frozen, microwave dinner in front of the TV. This is what life had become for me, I guess. I didn't have energy to do much else these days, not to mention for myself. I used to think of myself as this badass who didn't need anyone. I thought of myself as a loner in the world since I was alone most of my life, but I was wrong…so wrong.
I've always sought out for some form of companionship since I hate being left alone in the dark, even if I didn't think I was. I hate being by myself and alone with my thoughts. I've always had someone in the past; just a simple person to talk to me and tell me it was okay, that I'm not alone, and I took advantage of every single one of them and was alone again. I was completely and utterly alone now…
And I hated it.
Beep
I glanced up and spotted the message machine on the table on the opposite side of the room. I watched as it beeped again, and a light flashed signaling there was a message. I stood up and walked over to it, hitting the play button and listening as I wiped my eyes clean, not believing I had actually started to cry.
"Axel Lea, this is Dr. Randal Everest of the Sunset Hill Psychiatric Hospital. I wanted to let you know that we have decided to give you the position..."
Roxas's POV
I opened the door as Naminé hung up the phone. I saw her poke her head into the hall when she heard the door open, and she ran toward me and hugged me tight, but I didn't hug back.
"I guess you got upset that Leon couldn't come?" she questioned. I nodded as I shut the door and made my way into the quiet house. I had left much earlier in the evening after one of the few people I actually invited turned me down. Leon was still like a father to me, even though he was my uncle. It was well past 10:30 p.m., but I didn't really care. I had been so stressed lately, and Leon's refusal just sent me over the edge. "You don't have to worry about that anymore though!" Naminé said, pulling me from my thoughts.
"Huh?" I questioned confused, and she laughed slightly.
"Demyx suggested this nice restaurant in Twilight Town that was cheap, but nice. It's like a compromise for our tastes!" she explained happily. "My dad took care of everything and is buying everyone tickets to get to Twilight Town, aren't you happy?" she questioned with big, hopeful eyes.
"Y-Yeah…relieved," I said hesitantly, not meeting her eyes. She looked at me worriedly, reaching her hand out, but I caught it and placed it at her side again. "I'm tired, so I'm just gonna go to sleep, okay?" I said, heading for the stairs and not waiting long enough for an answer. When I reached the top of the stairs, I all but ran to my room and slammed the door behind me, breathing deeply. What was I so worked up about? Was it maybe the fact that the thought of Naminé touching my face was revolting?
I walked over to the bed and pulled a small shoebox out from under the bed and placed it on the sheets, kneeling beside it on the floor. I carefully lifted the lid, pulling out a few photos of Twilight Town scenery. I glanced at them fondly, remembering exactly where and when I took each picture, until I reached the bottom of the box and pulled out a picture that had been taken on the trails up at the park. It was where each trail merged and more specifically, the bridge that allowed you to cross over the stream. Of all the pictures I took in my years living in Twilight Town, I loved this picture the most. The real marvel was not the location of the picture, perfect as it was, but of the person sitting on the bridge.
Axel.
He was sitting happily on the bridge, one knee drawn up to his chin and the other dipped into the water. His left arm wrapped around his drawn up left leg and his right arm supported his weight, but his face was the real reason I loved the picture. That gentle, caring smile on his lips as he thought of something truly pleasant graced his beautiful features; a smile that I knew for a fact I was the only one to see. I picked up a close up on his face and stared into Axel's eyes in the black and white photograph. The emotions that had been swirling around were hard to name, and I didn't dare try. I placed the picture on the bed with the others and picked up a thin strip of pictures from the Twilight Town photo booth. I could tell my reluctance from the pictures, but the last one on the strip is what caught my attention.
Axel was holding my head as he kissed me sweetly on the lips. I could tell I was shocked, but didn't care, and that Axel was excited I wasn't pulling away. I smiled slightly and placed my head in the crook of my arm and let out a quiet sob.
What am I supposed to do? I'm still in love with Axel!
Demyx's POV
"To call or not to call…" I started as I stared at the phone on the table in front of me. "That is the question," I finished with a sigh.
"Demyx, stop quoting Shakespeare and butchering it," Zexion called out from the sitting area of the suite. "I happened to have read Hamlet, and you do it no justice," he finished. I ran a frustrated hand through my hair and stormed over to Zexion.
"I don't care if you read Hamit~"
"Hamlet," he corrected, not once looking up from his book.
"That's beside the point! The issue is if I should call and warn Axel about this, or if I should just let things play out!" I yelled. Zexion finally looked up, simply moving his eyes up to glare at me from behind his reading glasses, and his general expression wasn't a pleased one. I kneeled beside him. "Sorry…" I muttered quietly.
"Demyx," Zexion started, pulling my chin up so I was looking into his eyes, "don't tell him a thing. We'll be going home soon, you'll sing for the party, and then Roxas and Naminé will either announce an engagement or a breakup. Leave it to fate," he said simply, turning back to his book and reading again.
"Zexy…" I whined pathetically. "I'll feel like an ass if I don't at least tell him something!" I cried. Zexion didn't look up again, and I continued to stare at him silently. I knew if I stared long enough, he'd notice me and continue the conversation with me.
"I can feel your stare, and it is bothering the hell out of me," Zexion stated while turning the page. I let out a sigh of frustration before calming myself down.
"What is the maximum punishment for calling Axel and warning him about this?" I questioned curiously, standing up and massaging Zexion's small shoulders.
"Depends," he stated evenly, ignoring my movements. "I'd saw two weeks no sex and four weeks on the couch." I continued to massage and moved slightly to his back. "If you keep sucking up, four weeks no sex and eight weeks on the couch," he finished. I removed my hands and ran them through my hair. "Demyx." Zexion closed the book and turned to face me. Now he was serious. "Axel will be just fine. We all know he's good at improvising in stressful situations…he'll be perfectly fine," he promised and turned around again. "Can you get me some tea?"
I walked back into the kitchen silently and glanced at my cell phone, wondering if I should say anything. Zexion was normally right, and if I played my cards right and sang the right song I could get those two to finally see eye to eye and admit their feelings to one another and finally get back together. I really liked Naminé, but Roxas wouldn't make her happy if he was suffering. They both needed different people, and I'm willing to bet that Roxas and Naminé think the same thing too.
Roxas's POV
"You look good, cuz!" Sora called to me as I stood in front of the mirror dressed in a black tuxedo. It was custom made to tailor my short stature, and since Naminé's father was paying for it I didn't have to worry about the money. "You look better than Riku in one!" he complimented. I heard him cry out as Riku probably hit him, and I turned to the side. I didn't like wearing tuxedos or suits; it made me think back to the day I lost Yuffie, my dear aunt and mother figure for so long. I fixed the collar and tried a smile, but I just couldn't. We were heading for Twilight Town tomorrow, and I knew I'd be tempted to seek out Axel if I went, but after all the arrangements, it'd be a waste if I got cold feet now. Besides, it was only the announcement that I had to worry about.
"Are you pleased?" the tailor beside me asked.
"Yeah… It's great," I said quietly.
"Good. I'll take it and get it all together for you to take home," he said as I walked back to the fitting room while Riku and Sora bickered about God knows what. I stripped quickly, handing the worker the tuxedo over the top of the door. When I was sure he walked away I let out a quiet sigh, rubbing the bridge of my nose.
What was I doing? I had to stop this before it got out of control…no! Just, no! It's Naminé now! I understand I had past feelings, but it was just that of a confused teenage boy in high school. I didn't know what I wanted back then, but I know now, and it's Naminé. I dressed quickly and met with Sora and Riku in the main part of the store after I grabbed my tuxedo, and we headed for the car.
"The girls should be finishing up in the dress shop soon, but what should we do in the meantime?" Sora questioned.
"Lunch?" Riku suggested. "The girls wouldn't mind if we caught a bite, right?" Riku said, looking to me.
"Did you get a hold of Leon?" I questioned, totally ignoring what the others were talking about. Sora looked confused, and Riku rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, he said he could maybe stop by with Rinoa," Sora explained. I nodded. "So you knew he was seeing Rinoa? I didn't…" Sora trailed off as I nodded. I remembered Leon had called me a month or two back to tell me, but asked that I didn't tell Sora. I didn't, and I guessed Sora must be pretty angry about that.
"The guy's lonely, and she was there," I pointed out as I set the tuxedo in the back seat of the car as Sora stood beside Riku pouting. "You know Yuffie would have wanted him to move on eventually," I reminded him, and he eventually nodded.
"It's just…weird," he said as we began to walk. "He looked like he was coping, but I knew that he'd never fully get over it, but I guess he did…"
"Sora," Riku stepped in, "shouldn't you be happy that there is someone else out there that can make your father happy?" he questioned as we stopped at the café. "Besides, Rinoa is nice and a lot like Yuffie, except not as…in your face," he added while gesturing.
"I guess…as long as he's happy, I don't care," Sora announced openly. "Just wish he told me sooner," he grumbled as he and Riku walked into the café.
Was that what was running through Axel's head when he watched me walk away before he left for Twilight Town? If I was happy…he was happy?
Axel's POV
"Okay, can I have everyone's attention?" Marluxia called out Thursday morning. The small crowd of employees in the kitchen turned toward Marluxia who was standing on a chair at the front of the kitchen. Larxene wasn't here beside him like she normally was, but since it was earlier than usual, she had to stay at home and take Xion to school. Not like I minded…Xion was still important to me; I still saw myself as her father, even if she didn't. So, instead of Larxene at his side, it was me. He always told me that if I wasn't planning on another career in the future, he'd make me his assistant manager.
"First," Marluxia addressed the crowd, "thanks for coming in an hour early to listen to me blab about what you probably don't think you'll care about," he started off while everyone laughed. "Larxene might be bringing doughnuts," he added, and everyone continued to laugh, including him. I just chuckled slightly, not really in a joking mood. "Second, I have some, in my opinion, big news," he went on. "The head of Sure for Life insurance agency contacted me about having his daughter's engagement party here Friday night," he explained happily. Some of the people began to whisper since the company was pretty well known around the country. "In short, we're gonna need everyone's help to get this place just perfect for then," he finished happily, dropping down from the chair.
"It's pretty short notice, don't you think?" I questioned him when he smiled to me. He only waved his hand, looking away and approaching the long, centre counter top and placed a list on the top and everyone crowded over to read it as he stepped back, "Not to mention you called everyone here and hour earlier just to tell them that…" I trailed off, glaring slightly at him since I didn't get much sleep last night anyway.
"Trust me," he said, turning away from me, "it will take them an hour to read that list over," he said. "Come with me, I wanna talk to you," he added, leaving the kitchen. I simply yawned and followed him, stretching slightly as I moved after him. We walked out to the front counter and he watched me carefully as I leaned back on the counter and slumped back slightly.
"What's up, boss?" I questioned with a small smirk.
"Do you know who the daughter is?" Marluxia inquired, looking at me as if reading my face for a reaction.
"Nope," I said simply, not meeting his eyes. Where was he going with this? No, on second thought, I don't wanna know. "I don't really care either, as long as I get paid a bonus for working," I said, straightening my posture, and heading for the main dining area and busying myself by putting chairs down.
"Her name is Naminé," he called out suddenly, causing me to pause for a brief second. That would mean that… "Her fiancé is Roxas," he finished for me, looking me over with a concerned face. "Demyx called me to tell…" his voice faded as my mind began to run wild with different thoughts and scattered pictures. I saw Roxas, me, the clock tower, and so much else, but it suddenly stopped…
And I picked up a chair and placed it on the floor, pushing it in gently and repeating the process over again.
"Axel? Are you okay?" he asked me, and I looked over to him. His eyes looked around my face, probably looking for some sort of reaction, but after years of neglect and abuse, I developed a pretty good poker face. I needed one, and it always came in handy.
"Yeah," I said, cracking a half smile to try and fool him. "Great, why wouldn't I be?" I questioned, returning to the chore I gave myself.
"Axel," he started, walking closer to me. "When was the last time you got a full night's sleep?" he asked me quietly, and I shrugged. Normally I stayed up all night, tossing and turning, listening to every creak and groan the small apartment and the floors above and below emitted. Honestly, the last time I got any sleep was when I came home after I had slept with Roxas.
"Last night…duh," I answered, avoiding his eyes. "Geez, what's up with you?"
"Is it a crime to worry about a friend?" he countered. "You've been through hell all your life, and if there is any way to avoid more heartbreak, I'd gladly give you the night off. I promise that whatever you want to do that will help you, I'm all for it. Just name it," he promised me. I pushed in the chair in front of me right as the bell signified someone entered the store.
"Thanks, but I'll be fine," I finished as Larxene walked over to us. I turned away to continue what I was doing and heard them whisper to themselves quietly, but it didn't really register in my mind. All I knew was Roxas was going to come home…and I'd get to see him announce the fact that I could never hope to possibly have him again. Oh well, not like I should care anyway. He made it quite clear that day in the park that he didn't ever want to see me again. Too bad for him that he'll have to see me one last time, but it won't be for long. Starting Monday, I'll have a new job over in Sunset Hill…my dream job. I still haven't told anyone yet, but I sort of planned to just…disappear. Again, a skill I picked up as a kid, and perfected by watching those who I care about leaving me behind.
"Axel," I glanced up at Larxene who was looking to me expectantly. "Might interest you to know that Xion tested highest in her class," she told me. I looked down and nodded.
"Smart…just like her mother," I said quietly. I glanced to Marluxia as he looked me over for a reaction, yet again. "You know how you asked me that whatever would be good for me, you'd be okay with it?" I asked him suddenly, deciding it was now or never to break the news. I wasn't just going to leave; I couldn't do that to my friends…the only ones I have left. He nodded with a side glance to Larxene. "Good," I said turning from him, "'cause I have the perfect idea!" I stated proudly.
"Yeah? Just name it!" Marluxia encouraged, and I turned to face him with a big smile.
"I'm quitting!" I said simply, and both Larxene and Marluxia's faces fell into one of plain shock. "Consider this my two week's notice, but I start my new job on Monday," I explained, "I'll work for you till then," I promised with a soft smile on my face.
Roxas's POV
When we arrived in Twilight Town the previous night, we stayed at the nicest hotel in town, but I could sleep. I spent the night watching Naminé sleep peacefully beside me, envious that I couldn't be as carefree and laid back about all this like her. In the morning, I just made some coffee and left a note for Naminé, explaining I was going for a walk, which for once wasn't a complete lie. I took my camera and headed for the park, walking through the town I hadn't stepped foot in for four years. It was as quiet as I remembered, peaceful, and so much more different than the Radiant Garden I was now used to. I took a few pictures of the landscape, some pretty flowers, before sitting on a park bench and staring at the ground. Tonight was the night…the night I decide once and for all what I was going to do and who I was going to spend the rest of my life with, and I couldn't help but feel I was making the wrong choice.
I could talk to my dad, but he'd tell my mom and then we'd have a huge mess.
Maybe I could talk to Sephiroth… No, Zack sticks to him like glue and talks more than anyone I know.
Maybe I could try Leon? No… He wouldn't be the right person to talk to about this either!
Hayner? But I already talked to him about this…and it's what got me in my current mess!
I pulled out my phone and flipped though the contacts on my phone, hoping a name would pop out at me. I wasn't getting anywhere until I hit the end of the names, and found Zexion there. He's smart, quiet, and understanding. He'd be a good person to talk to about this… I think. I dialed him and waited for a few minutes. I thought he wouldn't pick up after the fifth ring, but he did.
"Hello?" spoke the quiet voice of Zexion on the other end.
"Zexion? It's Roxas. I was wondering if we could talk…soon. I~"
"Do you know where the studio is? It's in Sunset Hill, and if you need to talk right now you could come by. I'll alert the security that you'll be coming by. I must be going, I'll see you there," he said and hung up before I could even respond. Not like it mattered that much, I would have gone anywhere if it meant I could voice my opinions aloud. I stared down at the ground again and sighed.
"You sound sad, Roxas," I looked up suddenly at the sound of my name and spied someone slightly familiar. I remembered seeing the man at the funeral home when Alec had died. Axel seemed rather comfortable with him, so I guess he wasn't too bad.
"Setzer, right? Axel's friend," I stated halfheartedly, hoping I was right. He smiled and nodded.
"Yes. I may be old enough to be his father, but I would still call us friends," he said and pointed to the empty bench space beside me. "May I?" he asked, and I nodded. He sat down. He was dressed blue jeans with a white shirt and black jacket. "Funny I would run into Axel's best friend on my morning walk," he said, and I shrugged, feeling comfortable with him despite barely knowing him.
"I wouldn't call us best friends. I don't really know what we are anymore," I trailed off, looking around me. "I don't know if Axel told you much about our little…situation for lack of a better word," I started. "In fact, I was getting ready to visit another friend in Sunset Hill when you saw me," I explained, and his eyes lit up.
"How interesting. I was going to finish up my walk in Sunset Hill…shall we go together? I'll pay for the tram tickets if you don't mind," he said, getting up and gesturing me to follow. I smiled and followed him, feeling grateful he would be so friendly to a stranger like me. "Forgive me for asking, but what seems to be the problem between you and Axel, Roxas?" he asked, and I looked down as we made our way through the park, our destination being Station Tower.
"It's kind of hard to explain…it starts back four years ago," I said, and he gave me a look, urging me to continue. "When we met in high school, I didn't really like him, but as I got to know him better, I realized he was slowly changing me…changing me into someone better…the someone I used to be," I said, and Setzer nodded in understanding, "We were…very close until my parents came to take me home to Radiant Garden where I live today," I pointed out. "Obviously, the night of my going away party, we were all kidnapped by Axel's crazy dad," I said, rubbing my shoulder as a phantom pain shot through the area I had been shot.
"Yes, the news painted you to be a hero, being the one who shot the man down," Setzer said and winked at my confused face. "You were in the hospital too long to have really gotten a chance to bask in your glory," he said and laughed slightly. "A friend of mine on the force wanted to give you a medal, but was convinced otherwise by his superiors…and your doctors," he said as we drew closer to the station.
"Y-Yeah, I was a bit unstable after that…" I trailed off, and he nodded.
"I heard from some of the doctors about that…them being the only way I could keep track of Axel. He seemed to always be by your side," he said, and I blushed before nodding.
"He refused to believe I was nuts," I said quietly as we walked inside the station. "Why is it you never heard any of this from Axel?" I asked him as we waited in line at the ticket booth. "You keep saying you heard from doctors or your friend on the force."
"Well, believe it or not, I have known Axel his entire life," he said, and I blinked in confusion. "You see, I happened to have been his mother's best friend when we were younger. She made me promise before Axel was born, back when she was still struggling to stay off of the drugs, that if she wasn't able to look after Axel I had to look after him for her," he said, and I looked away as he ordered the tickets. He had been friends with Axel's mom? But she was evil, and totally ignored her son for drugs and alcohol. She had even sold his body for a fix! "Believe me, she wasn't always a bad person. It was very hard on her towards the end," he said as we walked toward the train. "When she died, I tried to get Axel into my custody like his mother wanted, but as fate would have it, I lost out to Alec, and he even pulled a restraining order against me," he said sadly. "It only became null a few hours before his death when he called me in surrender," he explained as we took seats across from each other on the tram. "But you and Axel were so very close, it's hard to believe you aren't anymore."
"Well, when graduation came, and I left, he promised he'd visit…but he didn't," I finished quietly. "I started to hate him until he just popped up again in my life. Now I don't know what to think anymore," I finished lamely, staring at my shoes, something I'd done a lot today.
"So you're going to talk to your friend to sort things out?" he asked, and I nodded. "I hope you do, because Axel seems as confused as you," he said, and I looked up suddenly. "I talk to him every now and again. It seems his daughter—or well, step-daughter—is living with his friends, refusing to be near him," Setzer said, and I paled. Xion deserted him too? "Don't worry though, I talked to Axel just recently and he's doing fine…but he could use a friend," he explained. I looked down and nodded slightly. Hopefully Zexion can help set me straight. "He could use you, Roxas," he said, and I looked out the window.
"You're probably right," I decided. Who else knows Axel as good as I do? Who else can have such an effect on him as I do?
"Il tempo guarisce tutte le ferite, Roxas," Setzer said, and I turned to look at him suddenly at the sound of the different language. "Time heals all wounds, Roxas," he explained, and I nodded and returned to looking out the window.
I didn't know Setzer could speak Italian.
Axel's POV
The rumor of my new job spread fast among the employees of the small pizzeria. I didn't deny the fact I was quitting or the fact I would be moving to Sunset Hill to be closer to work. Many of my friends here wished I would stay, almost begged me to, but I only told them no. Maybe I should take a page out of Roxas's book and finally move on. A change of scenery would be good for me, making myself a clean slate and forgetting everything that's transpired here in the last twenty some years of my life. I'd even go as far as changing my damn name if it meant I could just forget everything. Tonight would be my last night working here, tomorrow the last night I'd be in Twilight Town, and the day after would be the beginning of my new life. Marluxia and I haven't talked much since I told him about me quitting, but he didn't seem to care about me quitting. All of my friends have the ability to read into my motives, and he probably knows why I'm leaving so suddenly like this.
When I told Demyx and Zexion about all they missed last night when they came home they were both pretty shocked; Demyx especially when I told him about my momentary lapse in self control and began drinking. I can still feel the pain in my gut from where he punched me after it happened and the pain from the other punch on my right cheek. I was lucky that Zexion was there or he would have been much worse. Everyone knows Demyx is much tamer in Zexion's presence, not wanting him to see his violent side unless completely necessary. I didn't really sleep last night either and working on a total of three hours of sleep for an entire week was getting ridiculous. Maybe if I see Roxas announce his engagement I'll finally stop dreaming about him and be able to move on in my life. Maybe find someone else and~
"Axel!" I turned around as Marluxia walked up to me. "Can you help the guys in the kitchen? Larx and I can handle things out here," he said, and I nodded and walked past him. That was the extent of our conversations since I told him. I saw Larxene walk in through the door and I paused when I saw Xion standing behind her. I looked to the clock in confusion, but saw it was past three o'clock, so it was completely understandable that she be here. I stared at her as she took off her jacket to hang it up. She noticed me, and we looked at each other for a bit until her blue eyes narrowed and she turned away from me and followed Larxene to a booth to sit. I turned away and walked into the kitchen. I could understand why she still hated me, but it didn't lessen the sting of rejection of the one you've called family for such a long time after she lost her own. I walked up to the cooks who were bickering in the kitchen, and they all stopped when they saw me.
"What seems to be the problem?" I asked and they all began to shout their sides of the story and it only seemed to intensify the headache I currently had. I closed my eyes and held up a hand for them to stop speaking. "On second thought, I don't care," I said and looked at the counter. "Just make what is on the list there. If you're arguing over who does what, don't bother because I'll tell you what to do; we only got a couple of hours to make this place perfect," I said and started calling out names and giving jobs. It didn't take long, and I leaned back on the counter and watched them work, quieting under my intense gaze. They were all probably confused, I wasn't always such a jerk, but I guess it comes from the haunting thoughts in my head and the lack of sleep. I yawned, pushed myself off the counter, and walked to the back door. I stepped out into the chilly air and took a deep breath and let it out slowly. I ran a hand through my hair, pulling out the hair tie, letting my spikes hang freely, as I stared at the brick building in front of me. I wanted to take a walk to the clock tower, but I couldn't since I was working. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and took it out, not caring who it was. "Hello?"
"Axel! I'm glad I finally got a hold of you!" rang the voice of my adoptive mother, Snow. "Your father and I have been so worried, you've been ignoring our calls, young man!" she chastised. I smiled slightly at her voice.
"Sorry, a lot has been going on recently…sorry," I said apologetically.
"Oh, don't you worry about it; I'm just glad you're okay," she explained. "Are you coming to dinner on Saturday still? Ella is gonna make your favorite, and I'm even going to be helping!" she said, and I smiled at the mention of the servant there, although she's treated more like family than anything else.
"Yeah, I'll be there," I said, and I heard talking on her end and waited as she responded to them. "Sounds like you're busy, so I'll let you go~"
"Oh Axel!" she called into the phone. "Don't go! I've finally gotten a hold of you! It's fine, really, the girls can handle the boutique while I talk to my son, it was just a small question, honest!" she argued, trying to keep me on the phone.
"Sorry, but I have to work too, so I'll talk to you later," I said and looked at my shoes. I didn't really want to go back to work, talking to Snow always made me happy when I was younger, but I just couldn't think to speak to her today. If I keep talking to her, she'll ask me more questions, and the one thing I hate most in this world is lying to her.
"All right, Axel," she said calmly. "I love you, and I'll talk to you later." I hung up instead of telling her the same thing and just continued to stare at my shoes for a moment. Two more nights. I just have to last two more nights, and I'm home free.
Roxas's POV
I parted ways with Setzer when I reached the recording studio and thanked him for buying my ticket on the way over and buying my return ticket as well. It was rather nice to talk to him, and I almost wondered if I still needed to talk to Zexion at all, but I just need to talk to someone in a similar situation…or has been in one at least. I walked into the building and the elevator doors were being blocked by two beefy guards that made me want to run away, but I stood my ground.
"H-Hello," I started weakly. "I'm here to see Demyx~"
"Name?" one asked gruffly, lifting an eyebrow. I blinked in confusion because I half expected to be tackled to the ground for asking to see Demyx.
"Roxas Strife," I said timidly, and they shared a look before stepping out of the way.
"Floor twenty-eight; go nowhere else," the other said threateningly. I nodded and scurried inside the elevator when the doors opened, and I pressed the button for the correct floor. The inside door was a mirror and I looked at my appearance with sad eyes. I was wearing simple jeans and a black jacket. I didn't brush my hair so it was a spiky mess and I looked like I was terrified of my own shadow. Is this what I've become from the beginning of the month? Have I sunk so low in despair of how screwed up my head is to become such a slob? This is terrible; no wonder people were looking at me weird all morning. The doors opened, and I didn't have to look at my reflection anymore. I stepped into the room and saw many colored chairs and a coffee table in the centre covered in magazines. There was another door on the other side of the room, but I didn't know if I should go through it. Not that I had to worry though, because the door opened and a woman with short brown hair walked out carrying some papers.
"Roxas Strife?" she asked, and I nodded. "Mr. Harris said you were allowed in," she said, and I walked past her into the room and shut the door behind me. I entered a small room with a couch and a sound board. A thin piece of clear glass separated the room from a smaller one where Demyx stood singing. The others by the sound board were absorbed in their work, all wearing headphones and listening to Demyx and didn't notice my entrance. I looked to my left where a few chairs were and spied Zexion—reading a book, as usual. I walked over quietly and saw Zexion was wearing headphones too that were connected to a long plug and eventually to the sound board. I sat down beside him, and he looked up with a slight smile and took the headphones off.
"Roxas, I'm glad to see you came," he said and moved so I had a bit more room on the couch. "Demyx was eagerly awaiting your arrival, but he has to finish up first," he said, glancing back to see Demyx singing behind the glass. "He wants to ask you about a few pieces he wants to sing tonight," he explained, and I nodded. "On the phone you said you wanted to talk?" he said expectantly.
"Uh, yeah," I trailed off and looked around the room. I ended up talking about most of my problems with Setzer earlier. Now what was I going to ask? "It's sort of about Axel…among other things," I added weakly. Zexion nodded and set the book on the small table beside the couch.
"I see. Well, Demyx has three of four more songs to get through on the album before we go home to get ready," he explained. "I've got time, so just start from the beginning," he said, and I looked up and took a deep breath.
"Have you ever hated someone…but found it impossible to hate them?" I asked suddenly. Yeah, that about sums up my entire issue with Axel.
"Just once…" Zexion answered quietly, looking at me. "Why? Is that how you feel about Axel?" he asked me, and I looked away.
"Sort of," I said and looked back to him, swallowing my embarrassment down. "Do you ever fight with him? Demyx, I mean," I said, and Zexion huffed and smirked at me.
"Almost all the time and over the stupidest things, no less," he said and glanced back at Demyx. "Although, we make up shortly after," he added and looked back to me. "Fighting is part of every relationship. It isn't real if there isn't at least an argument or two. It means that you care about one another," he explained to me, and I looked down, unable to stop the question that came pouring from my mouth.
"Have you ever been so angry at Demyx you left or thought about leaving?" I asked, and after a minute I realized what I asked and looked to him suddenly. "Oh man, sorry for asking. That's way too personal~"
"Just once," he started distantly. "It was after a string of small arguments that meant nothing to him, but everything to me," he elaborated. "First, he stood me up at our favorite restaurant to celebrate our two year anniversary of being together to meet with a man about signing a deal," Zexion explained. "Then he didn't even tell me he signed a deal until the night of his first concert…my birthday. He didn't really seem to care much about me and was very focused on his new career…his dream job," he sighed and pulled his knees closer to his chest. "Then after that, I saw him fooling around with some girls outside of the record studio…and when I asked him about it later he denied it ever happened." He looked back at Demyx as he sang wordlessly to us from the other side of the glass. "I was so angry, but I knew that it was just him being excited…that he finally got his dream job and was basking in all its perks as he slowly grew in fame."
"So you thought about leaving him?" I asked him, and he shook his head.
"It doesn't end there," he explained and looked at me again. "A week after the last incident he didn't come home from recording," he said. "I stayed up all night, calling him every hour to find out where he was…if he was okay, and then he stumbled through the door at five in the morning, intoxicated," he said and looked down again. "I noticed his shirt was on backwards, he reeked of bad perfume, and I just…snapped." He closed his eyes as if remembering the night. "I was so angry and started yelling. He yelled back, and it just escalated higher and higher up to me pulling my bags from the closet and packing my things, all while still arguing with him. In the end, I walked out the door, slamming it behind me and drove to my parent's home," he finished.
"What?" I asked, confused. Zexion and Demyx look so happy together, when would Zexion ever leave Demyx? It was something else to hear this.
"The next day nothing happened, and I supposed Demyx's fuzzy memories wouldn't allow him to remember our argument or the fact I left…until that night when he called my phone every five minutes, trying to get a hold of me, but I refused to answer. When he asked my parents where I was, they said I was fine and didn't want to see him. Before I knew it, two weeks passed. Demyx's persistence slowly faded until it just stopped the day of one of the most important concerts of his career at that point. I didn't know he had a concert that night because I didn't bother to bring my copy of his schedule. Then, at about eight o'clock, while I was watching a movie, I heard noises at my window. I walked over, wondering if it was Axel and Jessie trying to talk again, but when I opened it I saw Demyx throwing stones at my window."
"Really? But he had a concert, I thought," I said, and he nodded.
"He did, but he was outside my window. He tried to get me to allow him into the house, claiming my parents weren't letting him in. He was telling me how sorry he was and that he missed me, but I didn't care. We argued like that for a good five minutes until a new figure ran over to him, screaming about him being here. I couldn't tell who he was in the dark, but found out he was Demyx's manager and that Demyx was a half hour late for his own concert," he said, and my mouth opened slightly. "Demyx refused to leave that spot until I forgave him. I remember yelling down at him to go to the show, but he stood his ground and didn't move as both his manager and I yelled at him to leave for the concert. In the end, the man threatened Demyx's career and Demyx said something that just…turned everything around for me," he said quietly.
"What did he say?" I demanded of him.
"He proudly said to his manager, 'I don't care about anything anymore. It's just empty and lonely without Zexion. I'm not leaving this spot until I get him back, no matter what the outcome,' and he looked up to me and smiled before adding, 'Why didn't you tell me sooner what an asshole I was being?'" he said while still smiling. In the end, I grabbed my jacket and stormed out of my house and drug him to a car and got him to his concert an hour late," he said and looked at me again. "I made him promise to never do what he did again, and for the last three years, he has done just that," he said and sighed. "We've never argued like that since," he finished.
"I see," I said. So even though Zexion was ready to end it, Demyx changed his mind. Even though Zexion hated Demyx for what he put him through, he was still in love with him in the end.
"Hey, Zexy!" We both looked over as Demyx ran over and pulled his lover into a bone crushing hug. "What's with that look, what have you done to my Zexy?" he asked me. "Don't tell me you were here charming him?" he questioned jokingly, and Zexion pushed him away so he fell on the couch where Zexion had been sitting. Demyx then pulled the unsuspecting man onto his lap as revenge. "In all seriousness, what were you talking about?" he asked quietly.
"About the time I left you," Zexion said bluntly, handing the man a water bottle he grabbed from the table beside the couch. "Drink it all before speaking next, don't want you losing your voice," he said and turned to Roxas again. "I hope I helped a little," he said, and I nodded.
"I remember that!" Demyx said a few minutes later. "I even remember the song I wrote during your absence and how I finished it when you came back." He smiled and Zexion nodded. "Hey, how about I sing it for you two? We've been practicing it, but I haven't told the producer yet," Demyx said. "I'm still debating keeping it as a private song or not," Demyx said while Zexion got off of him. Demyx stood up. "Come on!" he urged, bouncing over to his band mates and talking.
"He writes a lot of songs for you, doesn't he?" I asked, and Zexion nodded.
"Okay, just slide on the headphones and give us a minute to prep!" Demyx said as he and the other members of the band entered the room. I slid them on and listened to Demyx thanking them for doing this on their hour break.
"Obviously when he's singing to women in the song, he only has it that way for the producers and managers," Zexion said right as Demyx began to call out the beat and the song started. "What is he doing? This is the wrong song," Zexion muttered quietly, but I just listened.
"A strangled smile fell from your face."
Demyx began singing, and Zexion leaned back while I leaned forward.
"It kills me that I hurt you this way. The worst part is that I didn't even know."
Demyx looked at me from behind the glass with hard eyes as he sang.
"Now there's a million reasons for you to go, but if you can find a reason to stay."
He closed his eyes and continued.
"I'll do whatever it takes, to turn this around; I know what's at stake, I know that I let you down."
He continued singing, and I noticed Zexion smiled slightly at the lyrics.
"And if you give me a chance, believe that I can change, I'll keep us together, whatever it takes."
While they played, I wondered briefly why Axel came to mind while I listened to the song.
"She said 'If we're gonna make this work, you gotta let me inside, even though it hurts. Don't hide the broken part that I need to see.' She said 'Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be."
Demyx continued his song, and I just pictured Axel when he told me his past, I saw myself telling him it was okay.
"You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me."
I saw Axel yelling at me for being distant with him and vice versa, realizing we needed to talk about so many things to be able to understand one another…to love one another.
"I'll do whatever it takes, to turn this around; I know what's at stake, I know that I let you down."
I looked down at my feet and listened to the song as more images of Axel and me flooded my mind.
"And if you give me a chance, and give me a break, I'll keep us together. I know you deserve much better."
I felt my eyes water as I thought of Axel. How he must have felt when I walked away from him, not even listening to his pleas.
"But remember the time I told you the way that I felt."
How could I ever forget?
"That I'd be lost without you and never find myself."
Of course I remember telling him that.
"Let's hold on to each other above everything else."
We did…always…until you left me.
"Start over, start over."
I wish we could.
"I'll do whatever it takes, to turn this around; I know what's at stake, I know that I let you down,"
No, I let you down Axel.
"And if you give me a chance, and believe that I can change, I'll keep us together, whatever it takes!"
Demyx finished and Zexion clapped slightly while the band hummed some more at the end. I didn't look up as I cried quietly.
"Roxas?" Zexion questioned, and I shook my head and looked up at Demyx from behind the glass. His eyes were hard as he looked back at me, and I cried openly. I knew that song was Demyx trying to convey what Axel felt toward me, and I'm proud to say the message was understood.
"Thanks," I said quietly and pulled the headphones off and turned for the door and left the room. I rode the elevator down to the bottom floor again, wiping my eyes and deciding that this had gone on long enough. When I reached the bottom I ran from the building and through the streets.
I'm done lying to myself, and I need to stop this before it goes any farther.
I want Axel. I need him.
How could I have ever thought otherwise? How could I have lied to myself for so long? He's done everything for me, and I just didn't want to admit I loved him after all this time of hurting and wanting him. I reached the station and gave the man my ticket and boarded the train and took a seat. The train seemed pretty empty, only a few people here and there and I checked my watch. "I still have time," I whispered to myself.
"Time for what?" asked a voice, and I looked up and smiled at Setzer. How strange to run into him yet again.
"I finally realized the truth and—and I owe it to you and some of my friends," I smiled and he did as well, sitting beside me. "Thanks for listening to me earlier, Setzer," I said, and he nodded.
"I guess this will make this much easier," he said, and I looked over at him, confusion etched onto my face.
"What do you mean?" I asked, and he smirked at me almost evilly. I noticed the few others on the train beginning to stand up and I saw the tell tale shine of a gun hidden behind their jackets, and my eyes widened. "You~" Setzer casually opened the newspaper in his hand, and I saw the gun sitting in it. The three others with guns sat near us while I glared at Setzer. I didn't want to cause a panic because of the other passengers on the train. "What the hell is going on?" I demanded lowly.
Setzer chuckled and smirked. "Well, Roxas… You're going to do me a small favor."
Oh snap! Poor Roxas got caught by Setzer! Who saw that coming? Man, he has terrible luck, huh? Again, sorry for the long wait, I hope this sort of makes up for it! Again, you guys are amazing and are what really makes a story a great one. Thanks for sticking with me, and the next chapter will be up shortly, I promise! Reviews are great!
Credit goes to Lifehouse for the song Demyx sang. My beta likes the band and was listening to the song Whatever It Takes, and we decided it really captures the essence of Roxas and Axel in my story. I just had to use it!
P.S. HAPPY HOLIDAYS!