Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII or Kingdom Hearts

Warnings: Possible OOC-ness; Angeal's brain turning into mush; slight crossover with KH

Un-Beta'd

Angeal and Genesis heard a commotion in one of the corridors of the ShinRa HQ. It sounded like Angeal's Puppy was arguing with someone. As they got closer, the voices grew louder and angrier. They were about to step in before it escalated, but what they heard froze them in their tracks.

"Next time, keep your kid away from mine!"

It was Zack's voice.

"I ain't doin' shit!" It sounded like that red-headed Turk. "It was your kid's fault anyway! And if anythin', its YOUR kid who shud be stayin' away from mine! My son got second degree burns!"

"It was self-defense!" Zack shouted back. "That wouldn't have happened if YOUR kid hadn't tried to burn mine to death!"

"He was depressed!" The Turk snarled. "You would've done the same thing if you thought your bestfriend had been murdered!"

"If your kid had more sense, he would've known that Sora didn't kill anybody! Let alone Rufus' kid! Axel KNEW those two were friends!"

The VP has a kid? Genesis mouthed to Angeal. Angeal shrugged, wide-eyed. They were both baffled and intrigued by the conversation.

"What's going on here?" It was the young ShinRa's voice.

Angeal and Genesis pressed themselves along the wall and leaned into the corner as if to hide while straining to hear the conversation. Angeal really didn't know why he and Genesis were acting like gossip-mongering paparazzi. Really, they were above this!

"Reno's blaming my kid for those burns Axel got when he tried to burn Sora to death!"

"...From that fight when Axel tried to 'avenge' my son?" Rufus questioned.

"He didn't know any better!" Reno defended.

Soon, Zack and the Turk were repeating their arguement. The ShinRa heir eventually ended their arguement with a few well placed threats involving some people named "Cloud," "Tifa," and "Aerith."

Though the two Firsts couldn't see the other two's reactions, they were pretty sure they heard some whimpers and groans at the Vice President's threat.

Just when they thought the two young men were finally pacified, another arguement cropped up. Angeal couldn't recall how it started, but next thing he knew, Zack was arguing again. Except this time, he was, to Angeal's horror, picking a fight with the Vice President.

"Get your kids away from Sora! All they do is cause trouble!" Angeal would have thought his student was shouting at the Turk again if it wasn't for the fact that it was the young ShinRa who replied. Angeal nearly groaned. His student was going to be in so much trouble!

"What are you talking about?" The young ShinRa drawled. "My children are well behaved. I can't believe you, of all people, have the gall to talk about troublesome children, Puppy."

Genesis would have gwaffed if it wasn't so undignified.

"'Well behaved'?! Your crazy daughter brainwashed my kid!" Zack cried in outrage. "Only Ventus is well behaved! And I bet the only reason he doesn't cause trouble is 'cause he's never around to begin with!"

"Namine was forced," Rufus retorted, his voice was starting to become rather heated. "She didn't have a choice. If you want to talk about psychotic children, why don't you look at your nephews?"

"But that's different, Boss," Reno interrupted. "They get psycho from daddy General."

Angeal and Genesis looked at each other. Are they talking about Sephiroth?

"Yes," Rufus said wryly. "You'd think at least one would get something from their mother. Makes one wonder if the mother is just as mentally unstable as her children."

"Don't talk about my sister like that!" Zack shouted. "If anything, your family's insanity skipped her!"

"Since when did insanity run in my family?"

"Since forever! Your dad's insane, you're probably a sociopath, and all of your kids are psychotic! Out of all of Tifa's kids, only yours are crazy!"

"True that," said Reno.

"Look at Reno's kids," Zack said. "Lea and Axel were cool -up until he nearly killed Sora, but that was it! And Kairi's probably the most normal kid from them all."

"If you recall, those twins wreaked havoc quite a few times," Rufus drawled.

"Yeah, but that's 'cause they got that from Reno," Zack said it as if that was a legitimate expanation.

The eavesdropping Firsts didn't get it. But apparently the other two did.

"Oh yeah, I remember." The Turk chuckled." Teef kicked my ass whenever those two pranked people.

"How come she never kept you in line, Rufus?" Zack sounded curious.

"As if she could." The ShinRa heir huffed elegantly. "Reno's twins kept her rather busy."

"Is that why your kids take after you more?" Zack deadpanned.

"Perhaps."

It seemed as if the confrontation was over. Angeal let out a sigh of relief. He just hoped Zack wouldn't be in too much trouble from fighting with the Vice President and his Turk.

"So," Genesis drawled, glancing at Angeal from the corner of his eyes. "When did the Puppy gain his own litter of helions?"

At that, Angeal's thought process came to an abrupt halt.

"Wait… What…?"

"…My friend… Did you not hear him?"

"What? He, wait – what? WHAT?!"

So, yeah... I wrote this a long, long, long time ago. Back when I was still trying to figure out the pairings of the KH kids' parents lol. It's just been sitting in my cloud storage, collecting virtual dust so I decided to just post it for the lulz.

Namine, Ventus, and Roxas were originally Rufus' kids before I decided to dump them all on Cloud and Seph, haha. I didn't want to make an OC, so I had played with the idea of Tifa being their mother, making them the half-siblings of Lea, Axel, and Kairi.

So yeah... crack pairing :P But obviously, I changed my mind and stole all of Rufus' kids and dumped them on Cloudy lol

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Oh, yeah! I finally uploaded the first chapter of my original story on my wordpress. If you wanna check it out, I'll PM you the link. It's a lot darker than my stuff here though, and written much more seriously.

Love y'all! R&R!