Far and Away

Far and Away

Chapter Eleven: Best Friend Turned…?

Babblings: Thank you all for not (completely) killing me after the last chapter. It was hard to write for me, because I like Jake a lot. I also like Wataru a lot. Don't worry: for those of you who like Wataru, he'll still be around.

Also, sorry for being away for so long. I was having fun in the Philippines and when I got back I lost all motivation for this story. But don't you worry: it will definitely be finished. I can't leave you hanging like that forever.

WARNING: …um… LEMON!

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"Are you in trouble?"

My head snapped up and I raised an eyebrow toward Haruka over my bowl over Cheerios. "Why in the hell would you say that?"

He rolled his eyes and bopped me on the head with his fork. "I mean, it's none of my business or anything, but I noticed that after all our games and practices you either jump into the guy-with-the-crazy-blue-hair's arms or you hurry home to him, and, well, he hasn't been around. And you aren't exactly the type of guy who would come over to a teammate's house just for fun, no offense."

You know, for a testosterone crazed guy, he was smarter than he looked. I just shrugged my shoulders and took another bite of cereal, hoping in the back of my mind that I would be able to keep it down this morning. "I came home after a game and he had his tongue stuck down another guy's mouth, so I left." By the tone of my voice, no one would think I cared in the least bit, but truthfully my insides were breaking. But at the same time they were breaking, I had already begun rebuilding my walls and this time they weren't coming down so easily. No crazy-haired, beautiful young man would make them fall, that's for sure.

"Man, that sucks," Haruka said, stuffing a bit of egg into his mouth. "You guys were really sweet. He seemed like an okay guy to me." Join the club. "But ya know," he continued, "we still have awhile until the game and I haven't gotten laid in a long time."

"You don't even swing my way," I pointed out.

He grinned a toothy grin and leaned in so his face was only a few inches from mine. "Well you sorta look like a girl. We can pretend." I take it back: he's not smart, he's clueless. But whatever. I had already resorted to being a slut; if he wanted it, I would give it to him.

So I tilted my head forward and pressed our lips together. "Let's pretend." I heard Kyuubi's little voice in the back of my head telling me not to, but I pushed her aside and I momentarily forgot about the little being growing inside of me.

Haruka grabbed my arm roughly and led me over to the couch, pushing me down and proceeded to tear off my pants. The entire time I knew he was thinking about some beautiful girl, but that didn't change the fact that he was really good.

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The flashbacks that had mostly disappeared with Jake's presence were back with a force now. I heard that word, "beautiful", over and over again in my head until I thought I would completely lose my mind. Kyuubi wasn't making it any better.

After about the hundredth time (and that's not even an exaggeration) Wataru called, I finally decided to give in and answer. "Hello," I said in a flat voice. I was expecting a lecture about not answering my phone and disappearing for the last several days. What I didn't expect was to hear Wataru tell me in a voice that sounded close to tears: "Kir, I really need you. Can I meet you somewhere?"

"Y-yeah," I stuttered. "Where?"

"The coffee shop I like so much?"

"Ok."

And then he hung up.

This was bad. I had never heard him sound so depressed in all the years I've known him. I glanced at the clock, thanking God that it was still early morning and I didn't have anything going on until our first play-off game that night, which I wasn't worried about.

"I'm going out!" I yelled at Haruka. I had been leeching a room off him for about five days. I felt bad, but he didn't seem to mind. He said he was lonely in the house by himself all the time. I didn't wait for an answer as I ran out the door and to the train station as fast as my legs could carry me.

When I arrived in the little café, Wataru was already waiting for me, seeming to have himself under control. "Hey," I said, sitting across from him and placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "What's up?"

"Where the hell have you been, Kira?" he snapped, something he never did. "You stopped answering your phone, Nina didn't know where you went, and Jake has suddenly up and disappeared." Now that was interesting. I wouldn't have expected Jake to run away, but that's what cowards do, right?

"Taru, why did you sound like you were on the verge of tears over the phone?" I demanded. "I didn't come here to get lectured like a child. I came here because I thought my best friend was in trouble. Don't waste my time."

His whole demeanor then did a complete one-eighty. He put his head down on the table and let out a mighty sob that shook his entire body. My mind whirled: this was bad, this was bad, this was bad. The world was just going to hell, wasn't it? I reached one scrawny arm across the table to lightly touch his shaggy hair. "Let's go somewhere more private," I whispered, stroking his head in a calming manner. "Come on."

"Can we go to your apartment?" he asked softly.

"I–" I stuttered, momentarily caught off guard. "Uh… no, we can't, actually." I absently touched the ring on my finger. In my rush the all my belongings out of the apartment, I'd forgotten about it and now I couldn't manage to take it off. Now that promise weighed heavily on my hand and my heart. Even though I knew in my heart that it was all over, my head was still telling me that it had just been a big misunderstanding.

"Why not?" he asked, quickly. Then added, "If Jake has done something to you then I swear to God I will rip off his balls and feed them my neighbor's dog."

"I'll tell you later," I said. "Right now we are dealing with you." I stood up, grabbing his wrist and leading him out the door. We walked in silence for a little while before I found a nice little bench to sit on. Placing my hand on his leg in a comforting gesture, I said, "So what's wrong?"

He did something a little confusing then: he put his hand on top of mine; a little absently, but still. "Hikari broke up with me."

"What?!" I screeched. "Why?" They were completely in love with each other. That didn't even make sense. And what was it: the week for heartbreak? Maybe it was a national holiday that we knew nothing about.

"She said I thought about you too much."

I did a double-take. What? As in he was my best friend and he thought about me or…? No way. I couldn't do this. I couldn't deal with my life. Fuck, fuck, fuck!

"Taru, what the hell do you mean?" I asked in a voice a lot calmer than I felt.

There was silence between us for a long while. I opened my mouth to ask the question again, but before the words were out of my mouth, they were forced back inside by Wataru, my best friend of eleven years, and the most heterosexual person I know, leaning forward and kissing me directly on the lips, for the whole world to see.

"Um," he coughed, pulling back a second later. "That's what I mean."

My mind was in overdrive. I didn't know what to do. I mean, I'd always kind of had a crush on Wataru, but I'd never loved him and I'd never though of doing anything remotely sexual with him, especially since I met Jake and fell completely, irrevocably in love.

But there were worse things than being involved with someone like Wataru and he would be supportive when I decided to tell him that I was pregnant… and that Jake and I were no longer exactly together.

"I'm sorry," he added. "I shouldn't have done that. You have Jake and all–"

"Actually," I interrupted, "with all due respect and all, I don't have Jake anymore."

He stared at me while he let this news sink in. "What? I mean, you guys were perfect…"

"He decided that he no longer needed just me," I said, bluntly. "So I moved out. I've been living with a teammate for the last few days. That's where I've been. I have no idea where Jake would have disappeared to, except that he's a sniveling, cowardly asshole, so he's probably found some place to hide for the time being."

"Wow," Wataru breathed out. "I don't… know what to say…"

"Then don't say anything. I don't want to talk about it. In fact, I've been trying my damnedest the last few days to completely forget about it."

"Okay," he said.

A calm silence passed over us, the distant sounds of the city distracting us. I didn't love Wataru, not like I loved Jake, and I never would, but it couldn't hurt to pretend, right? I'm sure Wataru would enjoy that. He would take anything. And I was desperate for something.

"Let's go see Estelle," I said. "I'm sure she'll have some sort of comfort food."

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"Kira," a voice whispered. Slowly, the face belonging to the voice appeared.

"Dustin," I said in a choked voice.

He wrapped his scrawny arms around me in a tight hug. "I can feel your pain. Please, please, come see me. I can't stand knowing that you are hurting like this. We love you."

"I know."

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We won our game that night, and the next night, no problem. A couple days later, I was walking out of the stadium the back way to meet Wataru so we could go back to Estelle's together. She had welcomed us into her house. Even though Wataru hadn't done anything besides that one kiss I knew he wanted to, but I think he was waiting for me to make the first move.

I didn't think much about walking that way; it was the way I'd always taken. But when I suddenly looked up, I wished I would have just braved the media.

Jake was blocking my way.

I gave him the finger and attempted to push past him, but he wouldn't have it. "Kir, just listen to me–" he started, putting a hand on my shoulder.

"Don't you fucking call me that!" I bellowed, slapping his hand away. "You can go straight to Hell. I don't have anything to say to you."

If the completely shocked look on his face was anything to go by, I'd say that he wasn't expecting such a violent reaction. Well, welcome to reality. I yanked the ring he'd given me off my finger; the ring that had meant so much to me and obviously nothing to him; the ring that made me fall even more in love with a man who never gave a damn about me. And then I threw it at him – and it nailed him right in the side of the head and clattered to the ground, loudly.

"It's over, Jake," I said, unwanted tears dripping down my face. I wiped them away. "I don't know why I ever thought you cared. Don't come looking for me. Ever. And give that goddamned ring to some other sorry sap who's dumb enough to give you his heart on a silver platter. Or is that what you've already done? Tell me: how many men have had that ring before it came around to me?"

He looked almost beautiful standing there, bright blue eyes watering up. "I never lied to you–"

"Save it for someone who cares," I hissed and pushed past him, not looking back to see the tears falling down his face.

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I sprinted up to Wataru who was waiting by his car. "Drive," I said.

It was only when we were safely on the highway when I put my head in my hands and sobbed. And as I cried, I couldn't help but think about the child growing inside of me and wishing that its father wasn't such a complete ass. I realized then that Kyuubi was right: I didn't want to lose this child. I wanted him or her to know that they were loved.

But I could ignore it for awhile longer.

Wataru stayed quiet until he pulled up in front of Estelle's house and put the car into park. Then he said, "I don't even have to ask, do I?"

I didn't reply except to lean over to his side of the car and crash my lips against his in a desperate kiss. For awhile, he completely lost himself and took over. But then he suddenly pulled back and put his hands on my shoulders. "I can't… do this, Kir. I can't take advantage of you like this."

"Please," I breathed, my voice begging him to do this. I needed him right then, more than he could ever realize. I didn't care if I didn't love him. He was my best friend and that was more than enough.

He opened he car door and pulled me through. "Fine."

We stumbled through the front door and into the bedroom we'd been sharing in Estelle's house. All the lights were off and we didn't take the time to turn them on. The only light we had was the moon. I pulled off his clothes and he tore off mine. And then we were ravaging each other. Hands and tongues were everywhere.

For a moment, I could forget. And it was better than all the other times I tried to forget.

"Take me," I begged.

"I don't have… anything…" he said, meaning condoms or lube.

"It doesn't matter."

"What if you get–"

"I won't. Just take me."

There was no more protesting. He stretched me very quickly and then slammed into me. I arched against his body, moving with his rhythm. He went fast, he went slowly. We were both experienced in sex, so it lasted a long while before I came and he released himself in me.

It was the first time I remember being filled with someone's essence.

I felt like crying, but I didn't. I was stronger than that. Instead, I rolled over into his arms and snuggled against him, our bodies still stilly with cum and sex.

"Thank you," I muttered before falling off into an exhausted sleep.

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Babblings: Well, there you have it. Wataru fans, I hope you liked it, even though it was angsty. I apologize for this chapter not being as long as some of the others, but at least I updated, right?

So, please, please review. I'm begging you!

P.S. This hasn't been edited because I wanted to get it up. I will do that later.