Title: Baby, It's You
Author: PurpleOrchid85
Rating: PG-13 to T
Fandom: The Middle
Pairing: Axl/Sue (Heckcest, Axsue, Lumberjack Lawyers, whichever shipping name you prefer)
Spoilers: All of Season 4, Heckcest 'twisted' Season 5
Summary: Sue and Axl drunkenly sleep with each other, resulting in a surprise pregnancy.
Warnings: Sibling incest, incest pregnancy, kissing, occasional swearing.
AN: First off, so so so sorry for the delay of the new chapter even though I have free time on my hands (methinks maybe too much lol) sometimes I can't seem to get a chapter (or one-shot if it's the one-shot series) done due to horrible writer's block, but yay finally broke that wall and got this chapter done!
AN2: Darrin already broke up with Angel and wants to date Sue again but he doesn't know she's pregnant… also Sean came up with the concession stand idea (much better than the original idea of the VIP seating Axl came up with in the canon episode) Also the Orsontennial cookies were inspired by Sue baking the Christmas cookies in "Christmas Help"…
Disclaimer:
Axl Heck & Sue Heck and every character that is mentioned in this Fanfiction in relation of The Middle are copyrighted by ABC and its creators/producers DeAnn Heline and Eileen Heisler.
Chapter Eleven: The Rescue
It was Friday, and Sue was once again attending the birthing class that was just after her last class, trying to pay attention to whatever Ms Evans was saying. This time, she was sitting near the back with Sally and her new boyfriend, Trent. According to Sally, she met him at an East Indy frat party and apparently had magic hands. Sue wasn't fond of him; because he kept saying "What up, Milf!" every time he saw one of the beautiful pregnant women in the class. She had commented to Sally that she preferred Carlos or Brock rather than Trent because he was a total jerk.
At the end of the birthing class, Sue reached into her handbag and pulled out an cute invitation and handed it to Sally and said "Here's a invitation for the baby shower. I decided on a baby shower instead of a normal Halloween."
Sally smiled and said rhetorically "Oh, cool so I get to meet your family and friends huh?" making Sue nod slightly confusedly then Sally nodded her assent and added "I'll be there then."
Later that afternoon, she was bored and constantly changing channels on the TV, looking for something entertaining to watch. Then she heard the doorbell ding and with a grumble, she clumsily got up and answered the door. To her surprise, she found the back of Darrin, who was muttering "Sue, want to go out?"
"Darrin?" she asked confusedly.
Darrin turned around, revealing that he was carrying a bear and flowers. Darrin just stared blankly at the obvious bulge Sue had, and asked "You're pregnant?" then once his surprise faded, he began to get angry "I broke up with Angel because I thought you were the better kind of girlfriend, but you went off and got knocked up by someone else. I guess I didn't know you at all."
Sue began to cry, alerting Axl; who was home for the upcoming Orsontennial, which was on Sunday. Axl came up behind Sue and angrily said "Are you an idiot?! Sue's pregnant, you shouldn't upset a pregnant woman!" then to punctuate his point, he said "You do not hurt-" he almost stuttered, but continued "You don't hurt my sister!" then he shoved Darrin off the doorstep, making Darrin stumble backwards and slamming the front door on him. Behind the closed door, Axl pulled Sue into a comforting hug.
The next morning, Sue was concentrating on finishing her homework. The house phone rang, punctuating the silent house and with some arguing between Mike and Frankie, as Mike reluctantly answered; it was Nancy Donahue who was the head of the Orsontennial float committee and was asking Frankie and Mike to confirm the commitment of being a float driver. After some confusion from Frankie until she remembered a certain moment from the street party on 4th July. Mike and Frankie had to listen Brick list his ideas for the Orsontennial slogan competition. As Brick reeled off starting with "Orson – 100 Years of Moderate Progress." The doorbell rang, and Mike, desperate to get out of the boring conversation he instantly gestured to the door and held up a hand, but Axl immediately yelled as he hurried towards the door "I'll get it!"
Axl swung open the door, revealing Sean and a nervous Darrin behind him.
"Dude." Axl regarded Sean in a friendly tone then coldly said to Darrin "And ex-friend." Sean enthusiastically responded to Axl "Dude!" then glanced between the two as he noticed Axl's cold reception towards Darrin.
Axl let them in, and once they arrived into the living room; Axl straddled the armchair's support, while Sean sat down next to him, grabbing some chips from the bowl on the coffee table and Darrin sat on the other end as if he was trying to stay away from Axl. After a few minutes, Darrin caught sight of Sue in the kitchen since she was foraging for food. He glanced into Axl and Sean's direction; the two were talking in depth about a video game Sean had discovered. Darrin snuck away and apologized to Sue, who due to her forgiving nature forgave him right away.
Axl witnessed this without Darrin knowing and decided to forgive Darrin as well.
After few minutes of guy bonding, which was simply hanging out and annihilating enemies in their favourite video game "Guys, I've been giving this a lot of thought. There's no telling when Orson's gonna have another centennial, so how's Boss Co. gonna make some cash off this thing?" Axl asked the boys while they were playing a game on Axl's gaming console.
Darrin pressed a combination of keys on his joystick and said distractedly "Hey, we could be those guys that put all the cones out for traffic and stuff."
"Whoo!" Sean yelled in victory as he annihilated an enemy then said in a patient tone "Darrin, I think the city does that."
Darrin suggested again, continuing to concentrate on the game in front of him "We could pick up the garbage."
"The city does that too." Sean said, trying not to laugh as he saw Axl shake his head and closed his eyes in obvious annoyance.
"Dudes, we're not manual-labor guys. This is Boss Co. with college knowledge." Axl insisted.
"Yeah." Sean and Darrin chorused, agreeing.
Sean suggested helpfully "How about a Boss Co. concession stand? My Mom still has a lot of the awesome brownies left over and…" he began listing food ideas for the concession stand.
Axl nodded with an thoughtful look "I like it."
Darrin murmured his agreement his eyes glazing over at the images of food floating into his brain.
"Let's do it!" Axl said, enthusiastically.
Sean agreed empathetically "Boss Co. 2.0."
"Whoo!" Darrin yelled both in agreement and cheering as he annihilated another enemy in the video game.
"Yeah!" Axl said, punching his fist in the air in celebration, then said "Three-way high-five!" as he put up both of his hands and all boys high-fived each other, then turned their attention back to the TV and their video game.
As the day dawned upon the Orsontennial, and while Mike and Frankie were being woken up by Nancy Donahue's loud hooting horn from their sleeping bags on the ground next to the cow float; Axl, Sean and Darrin set up the Boss Co. concession stand that Sean suggested on the opposite end of the street. Sean had offered up his mom's gooey chocolate brownies; Sue had baked Orsontennial themed gingerbread cookies and made a large pitcher of lemonade and Axl made tiny versions of gourmet sandwiches and Darrin made some fairy bread (as requested by Darrin's little sister).
When Axl saw Sue carrying the third lot of Tupperware boxed food which was stacked up in one of arms, her free hand carrying a jug pitcher of lemonade, Axl said "Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you doing?" and took the packaged food off her.
"Uh, carrying food?" Sue asked rhetorically.
"Sue, you've been on your feet all morning. You've been baking, then icing, then helping carry out the boxes. You should rest." Axl insisted.
"Axl, I'm fine." Sue retorted, which was true she wasn't even tired nor her feet weren't aching.
"No you aren't." Axl argued, thinking that she needed to rest.
Sue huffily put down the pitcher of lemonade with a loud thump, the movement accidentally splashing some lemonade onto the table.
She turned to Axl, hands on her hips and said sarcastically "Go on, give me some of your gems of wisdom."
She waited, then Axl groaned "I'm not doing this now. We'll talk later."
"Fine." Sue said stubbornly.
"Fine." Axl said mockingly.
Sue narrowed her eyes and almost shouted "Fine!" then stomped off.
Axl sighed, and then was momentarily distracted by the toaster that Darrin just bought.
"A toaster, Darrin?" Axl asked confused.
Darrin said " I bought Poptarts. I thought we can rig up something and get some electricity from one of the houses so we can offer toasted poptarts." He grinned, proud of his idea. Sean and Axl exchanged looks, Axl's a resigned look and Sean's an uncertain look.
"Fine Darrin, you do it. I'm gonna go and find Sue." Axl grumbled then went into the direction Sue disappeared, hearing Sean say to Darrin "So, how exactly would we do this?"
Elsewhere, Brick was lecturing the stadium crowd "…what will future generations think? Do we really want this motto? Is this the legacy we want to leave our children?" then a random woman in the crowd shouted "Free shirts!" when she saw the parade people tossing shirts into the crowd.
Brick continued sarcastically "Oh, sure, grab them up just 'cause they're free. Just 'cause it's on a t-shirt doesn't make it right!" but then a shirt landed on his head, then when he took it off to look at it, he gave a resigned grumble "Shoot, I'm a sucker for a good font! Curse you, Sans Serif." Then he quirkily whispered into his chest ((Sans Serif))
Nearby, Frankie and Mike, who was stuck in the Cow float; were arguing about their respective persons they sucked up to as Nancy Donahue and Bill Norwood overheard them over the walkie-talkies and they heard Nancy stridently saying "Um... float operators? Please switch to channel 3 for all domestic disputes." Frankie and Mike panicked and switched off the walkie-talkies just as they slowly started to head down the direction of the Boss Co. concession stand, where Sean and Darrin were in the middle of selling food, Darrin persuading the children to buy heated Poptarts by demonstrating.
As the cow float drove past, the cow's horns unknowing snagging the overhead rigged electricity cable and dragging it until it snapped, instantly sparking the papier-mâché top part of the cow. Once seeing the flame, everyone around the Cow float screamed in shock and started to flee, and just then the cable then dragged the rest of the cable making the toaster fly off the Boss. Co concession stand, an Poptart flying out of it instantly making the people around the concession stand scream even louder and ducked or fled, making Sean yell automatically and confusedly "What the heck?" and Darrin could do was gape in shock as the toaster flopped around on the road as it was dragged by the cable.
"Cut that cord!" Sean said, snapping out of his shock and chasing after the cable.
Darrin quickly followed Sean and said "I don't know how to do it safely!"
Sean snapped "Dude, I thought you said you knew electricity!"
"I didn't study that yet!" Darrin shouted back panicky.
As chaos erupted on the streets, Frankie who was inside the cow was complaining about how everybody hated them, until Mike noticed how hot it was in his area it was around then Frankie heard both Nancy Donahue and Bill Norwood shout the word "Fire!" Frankie yelled "Mike, Mike! We're on fire!" Mike instantly got out and helped Frankie get out, and as they moved aside, they watched the runaway flaming cow slowly trundle down the street in shock.
As an oblivious Sue was crossing the road, she was unaware of the threat of the runaway burning Cow Float until she caught sight of it in her peripheral vision and turned around and she froze in both shock and terror, staring at the flaming cow as it slowly inched towards her.
"Sue!" Axl shouted, then ran across the road and grabbed hold of her and swung her into the bridal hold and ran across the road, the float passing without even hitting them.
Axl deposited Sue safely on the grass, but her hands gripped Axl's Boss Co. shirt, her eyes unblinkingly staring in the distance.
"Sue? Are you okay?" Axl concernedly asked, the fight now forgotten, his hand cupping her cheek.
"Oh my god." She then murmured, burying her head into Axl's shirt slightly shaking in adrenaline and shock.
"I think you should be checked out by a professional. Come on." He gently pulled Sue towards the Heck house, ignoring the chaotic screaming and fleeing Orsonites, passing Nancy Donahue who was barking into her walkie-talkie in a slightly panicky tone "Has anyone seen Ron Cougar Mellencamp?" then abandoning it and bellowing into the crowd "Does anyone have eyes on Ron Cougar Mellencamp?!"
Thirty minutes later, Sue was lying on the reclining patient's bed, dressed in the patient's hospital gown, watching the attending obstetrician on duty pull over the sonogram machine all the while obliviously asking "How sweet is it that your brother is here for support?" Sue gave a nervous smile, while Axl stifled a cough-smile.
The obstetrician then rubbed the gel on the belly and ran the wand over it and staring at the screen carefully.
After a minute or two, she said cheerfully "Good news. It's all clear. Your baby is fine."
Axl stared at the the baby on monitor, entranced by the sight.
Then there was a noise in the hallway, which made the obstetrician frown and say "Excuse me." She put the wand back into its place and strode out of the room to find out what the noise was about.
Axl smirked and announced "I bet it'll be a girl."
Sue scoffed and said "I've got a feeling it'll be a boy."
The two stared at the one and the other stubbornly.
Axl's smirk became more of a sneaky one as he announced "How about this? If it's a girl, I get to choose the name. If it's a boy you choose the name."
Sue thought for a minute then nodded, smiling "Sounds good." Axl gave her a quick kiss, but Sue grabbed hold of Axl's shirt and drew him back and the two kissed a bit deeper.
Hearing footsteps approaching, the two quickly pulled apart, Axl clearing his throat and trying to look unaffected, while Sue was trying to hide a giggle.
"Sorry about that, there was a scuffle in the hallway." The obstetrician explained, but Axl raised an uncaring eyebrow which made Sue roll her eyes, but the obstetrician was ignorant to this as she picked up the wand and pressed it onto the belly once again.
"Oh, good timing, you'd be able to find out the sex of the baby." The obstetrician said.
Sue glanced at Axl, and then said "Uh….I'd rather it be a surprise, thanks."
The obstetrician shrugged and returned to the sonogram machine and started printing off the photos for Sue.
Once Sue was re-dressed back into her street clothes, Sue's cell rang and she answered it as she exited the room into the hallway, where Axl was waiting impatiently.
"Sue, where's Axl?" Frankie asked.
Sue sighed and blithely lied "I don't know, maybe he got caught up with something else." This made Axl grin and reach out and try and tickle Sue, whose hand slapped his away, making him pull an mock-offended look as he clutched and patted his hand, but his mock-offense faded into snickers.
Frankie, oblivious to the interplay insistently asked "And where are you? Ron Cougar Mellencamp is about to start soon."
Axl rolled his eyes and moved his finger in a round motion telling her to wrap it up.
"I'll be there soon Mom, I'll explain later." Then Axl pulled the phone and snap closed it mid-goodbye from Frankie.
Twenty minutes later, Sue pulled away from Axl and reminded him "Mom is expecting me to be at the Ron Cougar Mellencamp show." They were in his Nova, which was parked somewhere out of sight of the Orsontennial, and were making out.
"So? The singer's lame, and it's more fun in here anyway." Axl said
"Mom's still going to notice." Sue insisted.
"We can come up with some dork story that Mom would believe." Axl said, shrugging.
"Brad is supposed to meet me there too." Sue said as if that would settle the matter.
And there it was.
"Great. Mood gone." Axl grumbled, but Sue ignored him, tidying herself up and getting out of the car and crossing the road before Axl would think of a reason to make Sue stay.
He sighed and put his forehead on the steering wheel. His phone rang, startling him and answered it with a sighed "Heck." Then brightened "Oh hey Hutch. Listen, got a question for you…"
A few minutes later he was weaving through the crowd that was milling in front of the stage until he saw his family and pulled up next to Sue and sneakily whispered "Sorry about being a jerk." Sue turned and smiled up at him, which let him know that he was forgiven.
Then Ron Cougar Mellencamp began to sing "I was born in a teeny place and I live in a teeny place probably die in a teeny place oh, those teeny-weeny communities all my friends are so teeny-weeny…"
Axl snuck his arm around Sue's waist, noticing their parents were too absorbed with each other and clapping along to the song to notice. But Brick saw and gave him an pointed 'how stupid are you' look which made Axl give him an glare but the siblings were interrupted by an large colourful beach ball landing in front of Brick, making the younger sibling move backwards, accidentally bumping into Sue who clumsily moved back in consequence which made Axl's arm fall away from her waist, which made Axl's glare more cranky, but pretended to clap along to the music when Sue put a hand on his shoulder to rebalance herself but then her hand fell away.
Axl pasted a big smile upon his face and continued to clap along as Ron Cougar Mellencamp continued to sing "…my parents live in the same teeny town my job is so teeny-weeny provides little oppor-teeny-ty…"