11. Chapter – Trust
"Ian!" Charlie exclaimed as he took in the scene in front of him.
Before his lover had the chance to fully turn around to face him, he hit him with a powerful stunner that knocked him out instantly.
The redhead rushed towards the dark haired wizard who fell in a heap to the ground when Kyle let go of him and was gasping for breath. It was apparent that he was badly beaten. From what he could see, there were bruises forming on his face and arms. His eyebrow and lip were bleeding.
When he was close enough he kicked the unconscious wizard out of the way and leaned down to help his house guest. As he reached out his hand to touch him, Ian flinched away violently and rasped something which sounded suspiciously like: "Please..., don't..., uncle Vernon..."
Charlie cursed Kyle for what he had done. Not only had he hurt him badly physically but it also strongly reminded him of the time when they had arrived by portkey the previous week. Ian didn't know who he, Charlie, was and where he was.
The redhead considered what he should do. He should probably call Helga or Niko to heal him but he didn't think it would be such a good idea to leave Ian alone in such a vulnerable state. Besides, Ian wouldn't probably take kindly to the healers examining him in his current state when Charlie couldn't touch him without causing the young man even more distress.
The dragon handler recalled how he had brought Ian back the last time and so he kneeled down a few feet from the black haired wizard who was unsuccessfully trying to curl himself into an invisible ball, aggravating thus his injuries.
"Ian, it's Charlie," the redhead said in a soothing voice. "You're safe. No one will hurt you anymore. You are at my cabin in the dragon preserve. Remember the morning when you went to talk to Adelinda? Remember Adelinda? The..."
Charlie continued talking about the dragons and the preserve all the while watching Ian's reactions. When he was sure the young wizard was listening to his words he outstretched his arms in an inviting gesture and told him what he was about to do.
"I will help you up and to your bedroom and then I will look at your injuries, ok? I promise I won't hurt you." He got no visible response from the injured wizard but he was certain Ian heard him when he slowly covered the distance between them and Ian did flinch only slightly upon the physical contact. He decided it would be best if he carried the younger man to his bed for he didn't know how seriously he was injured. When he hoisted Ian up into his arms he noticed two things: the younger man stiffened and he was entirely too light. However there were much more pressing matters to deal with at the moment.
He didn't immediately lower his cargo on the bed but sat down with Ian in his lap. The younger man wasn't complaining about the arrangement and Charlie had to reassure himself that his new friend was indeed still alive. For it had been a close thing. He couldn't comprehend what his lover had thought and done. At the moment he wanted to kill Kyle but first came Ian.
While he thought about what could have happened in his cabin during his absence and trying to slow his heartbeat because, frankly, the sight of Ian being nearly choked to death gave him nearly a heart attack, he carded his fingers through the wizard's silky hair absentmindedly. This action like his speaking about the dragons earlier apparently calmed the young wizard for it didn't take long before he said "I'm sorry." in a raspy voice and tried with a hiss to get off of Charlie's lap. However the redhead held him in place and summoned a glass of water from the other room.
"Don't you apologise or move. You will hurt yourself," the dragon handler said still in his soothing but firm voice and held out the glass of water to help his guest drink some.
Janus was ashamed of himself, being such a weakling. He had lost the fight with his mind and lost himself once more in his memories. What was worse, it was the second time during his stay at the dragon preserve and he was again "brought back" by his host. He was such a burden and Charlie was still being so kind and helpful. He just couldn't understand why.
And now, now he was sitting like a baby in the older man's lap, for Merlin's sake! He had never sat in another's lap, well not that he remembered as he supposed he had been hugged and hold by plenty people before his parents' deaths but not since so why would he need it now, after all those years? But if he was honest with himself, it was kind of nice to be hold by someone who didn't mean him any harm. Who soothed him with his voice and touch.
Although there was a part of him that urged him to get his act together immediately and deal with everything on his own, Janus was so tired and comfortable in his current position that he simply didn't think the effort he would have to put into fighting the redhead worth it, as it became apparent that the redhead wouldn't let go of him any time soon, and so he forced himself to relax a little and lowered his head on Charlie's broad shoulder.
The dragon handler sighed inwardly in relief when he felt the younger wizard give in and tightened his arms around him.
"What happened?" Charlie asked and the black haired wizard considered his answer. He didn't want to lie to his host but he didn't wish to anger him and cause problems in his relationship with Kyle either.
"Please, tell me the truth."
"I was finishing cleaning up when he came," Janus said after a short moment of silence in a hoarse whisper. He didn't want to go into the details and so he only said: "Kyle wanted to make sure I left the preserve and never returned. I'm so sorry."
"It isn't your fault," the redhead said, thinking: 'Kyle, what the hell?'
Charlie resumed carding his hand through Ian's dark hair to reassure the young man as much as himself while thinking. It didn't make any sense for his lover to order his assistant to leave the preserve. He didn't have any kind of authority to do that or any viable reason, did he? And why would he want to force his guest away with such force?
Now that he thought about it, hadn't Ian withdrawn from him since Kyle came to visit him the other day? Was his lover the reason for Ian to avoid him?
"He has threatened you before, hasn't he?" Charlie asked at last though his question was as much a statement as it was a question.
Janus didn't see the point in lying and so he gave a slight nod in response. He was so tired and the dragon handler exuded such warmth. It made him sleepy despite the pain he was in. He was so tired that he even didn't question the feeling of safety and just closed his eyes. The day had been so long and eventful and the emotional turmoil of the evening had worn him out. He just wished to soak up the warmth from Charlie, curl up and fall into, hopefully, dreamless sleep.
The redhead felt a strong desire to jump up and go murder Kyle but there were still the injuries that had to be treated and it didn't look like the black haired wizard would stay awake much longer. Therefore he shoved his anger into the back of his mind. At least for the moment.
"I need to look at your injuries and call Niko or Helga," he informed Ian but he wasn't prepared for his guest to stiffen and shake his head.
"No, no. Please don't. I have potions in my bag. I'll deal with it."
Charlie thought only for a second. Either he could fight the younger man and call the two healers despite his wishes, or examine the damage, help as far as possible and then, if necessary, insist on seeing the healers nonetheless.
"Ok, but let me help you." Ian eyed him warily for a moment but then nodded. The redhead set him down on the bed carefully so as not to jostle the injuries and then asked after the potions. Instead of giving Charlie the directions, Ian summoned the pouch from his trunk and laid it beside himself.
"There's Pain Reliever and a rather potent general healing ointment in there," the black haired wizard stated and with a glance at his body said: "Nothing's broken."
"Why don't you let me make sure?" Charlie asked. His assistant was clearly very uncomfortable with the situation. It was rather odd that he refused to let the healers heal him. Odder still that he didn't want to be examined by Charlie, wishing to have treated the superficial wounds only.
He reminded the dragon handler of the hurt, distrustful dragons when they first arrived at the preserve or when they found them. It worried him greatly that Ian was so wary but he knew he wouldn't find out the reasons behind his behaviour if he asked outright. For now he would have to be patient. "I'll just use a simple diagnostic spell, ok?"
When he received another nod, he quickly performed the spell. He skimmed through the piece of parchment that appeared at the end of his wand and sighed in relief. Ian wasn't seriously hurt. He would be in pain but there wasn't any internal damage and, the young man had been right, no broken bones.
After he showed the results to Ian, he gave him a vial of the Pain Reliever and helped him take of his shirt. Though uncomfortable, the black haired wizard let him in the end spread the healing ointment on his upper body. Charlie was very careful so as not to cause the young man, who without his t-shirt on looked like he would break at any moment, any unnecessary pain. He was so very thin and pale.
It took half hour to cover all the bruises and lacerations. If he was more aware, Ian would have to admit that it was a nice change to have someone there when he was beaten. But as it was, he was so exhausted that he was halfway in the realm of sleep. On the edge of his awareness he noticed Charlie stroking his hair before he finally succumbed to sleep.
The redhead watched him for several more minutes after Ian's breathing deepened. The young wizard was such an enigma but he would put at least a part of the puzzle together. He would. He would find the reason for Ian's distrust. He would discover the reasons for Ian's escape and he would help the wizard heal both physically and emotionally because it had been the second time that he had retreated into his memories and that didn't speak for Ian's emotional well-being. Now, however, he had a lover to deal with.
He must have been angrier than he assumed when he had cast the Stupefy because Kyle was still unconscious when he closed the door to Ian's bedroom and warded it against any noise he and Kyle might make. He revived his lover and waited 'til he was fully awake. When he saw the awareness in Kyle's brown eyes, he punched him in the face and heard a satisfying crack in his lover's nose.
"What the hell, Char?" His lover exclaimed and sat up clutching his bleeding, broken nose.
"You know perfectly why. Just tell me one thing, why?" The normally calm redhead responded in a cold, angry voice.
Kyle tried to cup his face and kiss him but the dragon handler leaned away. The brunette growled in frustration. "Why? Why do you think, Char? You could see his pretty face and arse swing in and out of your cabin! I couldn't have that!"
Charlie was sure his face showed the surprise he felt. It was just so...
Kyle was jealous. Unreasonably jealous. If he weren't going to break up with him anyway because of the way he had treated Ian, he might have seriously considered it after this little proclamation. Of course he recognised the beauty in Ian. How could he have missed it? But he wouldn't have done anything about it. Without regard to what Ian would think of any advances from him, he would never act upon his attraction while in a relationship with another man. If his lover of several months didn't know him that much to trust him to be faithful, he wasn't sure he wanted to continue their relationship.
"You idiot!" The redhead hissed at Kyle. "You come here, threaten him, beat him up and nearly kill him without any reason! If you ever so much as touch a hair on him, I will kill you, are we clear?"
The brunette didn't even have the chance to answer before Charlie hoisted him up by his collar. Even though the dragon handler was smaller than he, he was much more muscular and stronger and so didn't have any problem in dragging the resisting man to the front door.
"And Kyle, our relationship is over! I don't want to see your face around here anymore!" And with that he threw the man out. He didn't stay to watch him pick himself up but went to his liquor cabinet to have a shot or two of Firewhiskey.
He now had an explanation for the feeling of unease when he left the cabin for the Order meeting. He didn't think how he knew something was out of order but frankly, he was glad that the disquiet made him hurry back instead of chatting with Bill. He just hoped there wouldn't be any repeat of the night's events any time soon if ever again.
When he finished his second glass of the golden elixir, he took a shower and went to make sure his guest was okay before going to bed himself. As soon as he opened the door to the small bedroom however, he saw Ian's small form trash from side to side in the light streaming in from the living room door. After a step into the room he could hear Ian whimper and moan. 'Silencing charms,' he thought.
It was obvious that the sleeping wizard wasn't in fact having one of those dreams but a nightmare and so Charlie didn't hesitate in approaching the bed and sitting down. He started talking soothingly to the dark haired wizard and carding his fingers through his silky hair. Not long after that the young man began to calm down and the lines on his face smoothed. However, when the dragon handler made to go away, the frown reappeared and Ian started to whimper again. So Charlie resumed his stroking and waited before the other man was sleeping peacefully.
This time, when he tried to retrieve his hand, Ian caught his wrist in a vice-like grip and wouldn't let go. The redhead sighed, took out his wand to expand the bed and summon a blanket from his room. If his presence helped the other to fight away the nightmares, he wouldn't leave him.
They would have to talk about everything but for now, he would sooth the nightmares of his guest away. He laid down, put his arms around the young man and quickly fell asleep.
From his years at the Dursley's and at Hogwarts, Janus was used to waking up slowly, mapping out his surroundings with his senses, well, at least those times he didn't wake up screaming from his nightmares. This morning there were several things out of place. For one, he was feeling rather well-rested. A very strange occurrence as he couldn't sense any lasting effects of a Dreamless Sleeping Potion. Also it didn't take long for him to remember that he was at Charlie's cabin in Romania but for the life of him he couldn't recall being so comfortable or having slept on a hard but warm pillow. Furthermore there was some odd weight resting against his back.
Perhaps if he recollected last night he could figure out what was wrong...
Right.
He had been brewing with Helga and Niko then he had taken a shower and made soup. Wait, Charlie hadn't been in the cabin but at the "chicken meeting". He had cleaned up the muggle way then Kyle had surprised him and had threatened him... And then... And then Charlie had been there asking what had happened (Had he really been sitting in the redhead's lap?) and applying the ointment to his wounds.
Well, he could certainly tell that he had met the wrong end of someone's fists the night before as his whole body ached but it wasn't so bad. He had definitely been worse, much worse but it still didn't explain why his head rested on a hard, warm pillow. As far as he could remember he fell asleep after the dragon handler finished spreading the healing potion.
Wait! The pillow moved!
Janus opened his eyes but the only thing he could recognise was his hand on the pillow – or whatever it was. Therefore he carefully raised his head and turned it slightly around, only to have to stifle a gasp.
'Oh hell! Charlie!' Charlie was with him, in his bed and he, Janus, had been practically lying on the redhead!
Though this explained somewhat the moving pillow (it wouldn't have been right if Charlie's chest didn't move, now would it?), the black haired wizard was still in quite a shock and wondered how it all came about.
He had fallen asleep alone in his bed, for Merlin's balls! And now he woke up, lying on his best mate's older brother.
'Shit!' he thought. 'I should get up.' And so he did or at least tried to because before he managed to sit up, the arm on his back tightened, causing him to pause and look down at the redhead.
"'Morning," murmured Charlie sleepily as he watched the other man through his still half-closed eyes. "Sleep well?"
Janus was about to answer the question when one of his own made it through his lips. "What are you doing here?" The black haired wizard lowered his head in embarrassment not only because of the situation they found themselves in but because he usually had better control over his mouth. On the other hand he would appreciate to hear a really good explanation right about now.
Charlie couldn't help but be a little amused. Ian in his still sleep ruffled state and obviously uncomfortable at finding himself in bed with him was really cute.
"I came to check up on you yesterday and you were having a nightmare," the dragon handler explained and as he felt Ian stiffen he started to stroke his back. "You calmed down when I was with you and you wouldn't let me go when I tried so, obviously, I stayed."
The younger wizard looked him in the eyes, searching for confirmation of the truth of the statement. When he found what he was searching for, he said sincerely: "I'm sorry."
He really was. He didn't want to cause the kind Weasley whose home he disrupted any problems and here he was being trouble as always. In addition he had been behaving like a baby. He was seventeen not three and he had always been dealing with his nightmares on his own, so what had happened the night before? Also, the skin on skin contact made his whole back tingle in a not entirely unpleasant way but the hand on his back was nonetheless distracting.
"What for? For having nightmares? For not letting me go? For using me as a pillow?" Janus blushed at this and ducked his head again but Charlie would have none of that. He reached out with his free hand to make Ian look him in the eyes again. "You can't help having nightmares and as for the other two, you don't hear me complaining, do you?"
Janus couldn't say anything to that as the dragon handler seemed to be serious.
"Still, I'm so sorry for–"
"Don't even think about finishing the sentence!" Charlie growled for he sensed what the other wizard was about to say and stopped for a moment rubbing the other wizard's back. "Don't you ever dare to apologise for what Kyle did!" When the black haired wizard met the sky blue blazing eyes, he couldn't help but be slightly taken aback at the sincerity there. He swallowed his words, although it didn't mean that he stopped feeling guilty for the whole mess.
"If there is anyone to blame beside the arsehole, it's me for not having seen what he was doing to you." Janus was about to refute this but when he opened his mouth, Charlie's eyes narrowed and he thought better of it.
"Now, I'm going to prepare some breakfast and afterwards we will talk, ok?" At his nod the redhead brushed his knuckles lightly against his pale cheek and got up.
"What would you like to eat?"
"Just some toast and coffee," the young man replied in a quiet voice. He felt quite bewildered and overwhelmed for the morning had been so far rather surreal. In the matter of fact the evening before hadn't been better. He had been attacked by a near stranger without any logical reason as far as he knew. Then there was Charlie, someone, a person caring for him, treating his injuries and apparently staying with him during the night.
Usually he was left alone to pick himself up again. At least since his first year at Hogwarts there had been Hedwig with him at the Dursley's, listening to him and doing her best at calming him down but before there hadn't been anyone. At Hogwarts it had been slightly better what with his friends but he could never bring himself to truly trust them and even less so to put any kind of trust in an adult. Yes, they were his friends and he divulged a lot to them, however, they had for example never learned about the full extent of the Dursleys' treatment.
Furthermore he had had more physical contact since the day before then he had had all summer long or perhaps longer (well, not counting his regular "punishments"). He was really surprised at his reaction to the redhead's touch as he would normally flinch away from anyone. He had learned to hold still when Ron or Hermione hugged him or touched him but he never sought it out. With Charlie though he didn't mind and what was more he had woken up snuggled up to him. What was it about the second eldest of the Weasley' children that made Janus trust him so much?
"Here is your blanket," Janus said putting the blanket on the sofa when came into the living area. He was still embarrassed about the sleeping arrangement of the previous night but he had time during shower to process it a little.
Charlie turned around from the stove to see the slightly reddened cheeks but he refrained from commenting. "Thanks. Breakfast will be ready in a mo."
They ate in a companionable silence and then the redhead charmed the dishes to wash themselves before pointing to the sitting area. Janus sighed inwardly at what was to come but he felt that being honest with Charlie was the least he could do after what the redhead had done for him. His instincts were telling him to trust the dragon handler and all of Charlie's actions towards him so far proved that he could tell him the truth. At least what he was comfortable with. He sat in an armchair and drew his legs up to his chest and stayed silent when the redhead seated himself comfortably on the sofa.
The silence stretched for several minutes before the dragon handler ordered his thoughts and decided on the safest question to ask. This whole conversation was obviously none too comfortable for his companion but there were still several topics he was quite sure, Ian wouldn't want to discuss right away and so he asked: "Why did you want to leave Grimmauld Place?"
Janus started playing with threads on his trousers, not looking at Charlie who was watching him intently. For several long minutes he debated with himself how to answer the question and how much to divulge.
"Before I give you an answer, I've a few questions of my own," he said when he made a decision. "How do you feel about the headmaster?" He asked and raised his head to see the redhead's face.
Although Charlie didn't quite understand where this was going he gave nevertheless an honest response. "I don't really like him. To me, Dumbledore is not really the figurehead or the epitome of goodness or wisdom."
"So why did you join the Order?"
"Well, I got my job thanks to Dumbledore so I partly had to. Partly I didn't know the headmaster that well when he asked me to join and obviously I wanted to somehow help in the war."
Janus studied the redhead's face but he couldn't detect any lie. Sure he could have tried to use Legilimency but for one he respected someone else's privacy and then he was quite certain that Charlie protected his mind against attacks. Therefore he nodded to himself in satisfaction. It seemed that he had been right about the redhead. The fact that he had helped him escape the Order's clutches was kind of a big giveaway but still better safe than sorry.
"I assume that you are using Occlumency," Janus said and at Charlie's nod he went on."But what I'm about to tell you must stay only between us. Nobody else knows. Would you mind swearing an oath?" The black haired wizard asked suddenly unsure of himself and of his decision.
However Charlie took out his wand without hesitation and said: "I, Charles Gideon Weasley, swear upon my magic to keep the following conversation only to myself and not to reveal the content of our discussion to any living or non-living being. So mote it be."
"I... thanks," Janus said after he had collected himself again. He was a little surprised that Charlie took the oath so willingly. He shook himself and cast a ward around them so that nobody else could spy on their conversation, however unlikely it seemed.
"I have long suspected that Dumbledore wanted to control my life a little too much and when, this year, Remus suggested a visit to Diagon Alley I made plans to go to Gringott's as I hadn't been there since before my third year. Bill picked up some money for me but it wouldn't have been enough to buy more books and new clothes beside my school supplies. Though Remus was none too happy when I told him about my plans upon our arrival in Diagon Alley, he agreed in the end.
When we were there the... goblins took me aside and some important things were revealed. I've apparently inherited more than only my trust fund and Nr. 12 Grimmauld Place but also everything of the Potters and Blacks."
"Well of course you have. You're last in the Potter line and it makes sense for Sirius to make you his heir," the redhead interjected wondering what Ian meant.
"Well, how should I have known that my parents or Sirius left me more than my vault and the house? I had no idea they were so wealthy! Who should have told me? Our esteemed headmaster? My dear muggle relatives?" Janus replied sarcastically.
"You didn't know?" The dragon handler asked but it was obvious his question was rhetorical. He was astonished. How could his inheritance be held from Ian? It was not only wrong but illegal! Who would stoop to something like that?
"Dumbledore?"
"I'm pretty sure," Janus answered in a dead voice. Not saying that the headmaster even tried to access his inheritance without his knowledge.
Charlie thought about what he just heard and he had to agree with Ian on one point at least. The headmaster really wanted to control the Boy Who Lived. Looking back it was quite evident that every year Dumbledore would plan for someone to either get Ian's money for him or to purchase his school supplies. He had never questioned this particular fact, thinking it simply a way of keeping the Saviour safe but with the new knowledge it made sense.
"But it's not the only reason for you to get away, is it? And what are you going to do about your inheritance?"
"Well, I'm going to let the issue rest for the moment. Take advantage of some stuff in the vaults and learn how to deal with the new responsibility. However, I can't do anything about the seats in the Wizengamot or accept my titles for the time being." As Janus could sense a question forthcoming he explained his reasoning. "It's not time. I want Dumbledore go down but I need to be sure he hits the bottom." At this Charlie nodded in understanding and waited for the younger wizard to continue.
"And no, it wasn't the only reason. I mean I was pretty fed up with everything, with the manipulations, the control and everything and I could really have used some time off but no. I..." Should he tell him? Should he tell Charlie about the secret hidden for sixteen years? Would the dragon handler reject him? Would he be disgusted? It was safe to divulge the secret due to the oath but still, it was a big secret.
In the end Janus looked into the Charlie's kind but slightly concerned face and honest eyes, took a deep breath and summoned all his Gryffindorish bravery. "I wasn't entirely truthful when you asked me about the change in my appearance. It has to do with glamour but in a kind of a different way.
You see, the way I look now, is the way I should have looked since my birth."
"How-"
"My mum put a glamour on me after my birth but it broke with my Majority. I had to conceal my true appearance since my birthday."
The redhead mulled the information over for several long minutes. He hadn't heard about a glamour that could hold for seventeen years but it didn't necessarily mean that such didn't exist and Lily Potter was rumoured to be very good at charms, so he supposed it could be possible. The real question was why would someone conceal the appearance of their child?
When the redhead looked at Ian who let his long hair loose so that it fell around his face, he started to put two and two together. If this was how Ian (or Harry) normally looked than Charlie couldn't detect any feature that would point out to James Potter as his father. He still had the green eyes from his mother but otherwise he didn't look like a copy of James. There was no doubt that he was the Boy Who Lived because though the scar wasn't visible at the moment Charlie knew it to be concealed under a layer of make-up.
When Charlie summed everything up, he came to the only logical conclusion. "James Potter isn't your father."
"No, he isn't my biological father although he did adopt me." Janus confirmed the statement before once again going silent. He had to think about how to explain as he didn't want to have Charlie read his letter from his mother. Although, strictly speaking, there wasn't anything the redhead couldn't know, Janus found himself strangely reluctant to share the letter.
While the dragon handler waited for his companion to speak he studied his huddled form. It must have not been easy for the younger man to find out about his parentage after having believed for seventeen years that James Potter was his father. Charlie couldn't fathom how hard it must be for Ian to accept his new appearance and identity, regardless of who his real father was. He wanted to take the younger wizard in his arms. To pull him close and never let him go. He looked so fragile and lonely but was so strong at the same time.
If it were anyone else, he probably would have acted on his instinct but everything about Ian's stance, his hair and legs making a physical shield between them screamed to keep distance and so the redhead stayed on the sofa. Waiting patiently and watching the young man.
After five minutes Janus finally decided on what to say. "When I was at Gringott's on the 31th I had time to make a quick stop at one of my vaults with heirlooms and other artefacts. Apparently my mother left there a letter for me... When I opened it later that night I found the explanation for my mysterious change of appearance.
My mother and James were never more than just friends and she married him for protection. James agreed for he himself became impotent due to an injury and needed an heir...
I..."
"You can tell me everything, Ian. I won't reject you because of who your parents are. You are your own person," Charlie assured him as he broke off and although he didn't quite believe him, he went on.
"I don't think many people knew that my mother and Severus Snape were in a relationship since their sixth year. He broke up with her after he was forced to take the mark. She never managed to tell him about her pregnancy."
Janus didn't look up to see the widening eyes or the shock clearly reflected on the redhead's tanned face. He didn't need to. He himself had been shocked into tears by the information and he could only imagine how others would react to it.
"So you see, my father is a death eater slash spy who doesn't know he has a son and who quite religiously hates said son."
At the bitterness and sadness in the young man's voice Charlie gave in to his instincts and crouched down in front of the wizard and tried to coax him to look at him. When emerald green and blue eyes connected, the redhead said: "You can't help who your parents are. I mean, I wouldn't have expected that but you don't get to choose your parents, do you?"
The dark hard wizard shook his head but he had to make sure. He couldn't detect any signs of rejection, only concern and sympathy in the blue eyes but he had to assure himself. "You aren't disgusted or anything?"
"Of course not," the dragon handler replied in a soft voice and took one of the slender hands in his big callous one. "Why should I be? Though I admit to be shocked it's none of your fault. Besides, I guess that if your mum had been in relationship with Snape for over two years and, as we know, he fights against the Dark, he can't be such a bad man."
Janus didn't say anything to that and stayed silent. He felt as if a burden was lifted from his shoulders. He had neither expected to feel better after his confession nor Charlie to accept everything so easily. Maybe there was something about the saying "A problem shared is a problem halved." In any case, he was glad.
"And how do you feel about it?" The redhead asked after a while. He had been shocked at hearing that Snape was in fact Ian's father but knowing a part of the history between Ian and the Potions Master from his family, he couldn't imagine what it must be like for the young man.
"I don't know. It's difficult to explain," Janus said after a while. For some reason seeing Charlie's response made him loosen up and the close proximity calmed him down. And so he found himself telling the dragon handler more than he normally would have. "I mean I have always thought that my parents were James and Lily Potter. Many said I was like my father because of my appearance and all but finding out it was all a lie was... I don't know... Knowing who my parents were was the only solace and the one fact I could rely on. But now..."
The young man laughed mirthlessly and looked down at their joined hands. "I have wished for parents all my life, you know. I have now, at the age of 17, found out that I have, in fact, a living parent. The only drawback is that my father not only doesn't know about me. No, he absolutely and irrefutably despises me. It's kind of ironic, really."
"And do you?"
"Do I what?"
"Do you hate him?" Clarified Charlie.
"No. No, I don't," Janus replied without having to think. "I've in fact respected him for some time. He's a truly great Potions Master and surviving as a spy for nearly two decades is also quite remarkable."
"Will you tell him?"
The dark hard wizard laughed another mirthless laugh and said: "I might be stupid but I'm not suicidal. Though mum left in the Potter' vault a letter for him as well, I don't think telling him is such a good idea. He would think I played a prank on him and either kill me himself or deliver me to old Voldie on a silver platter."
"Why wouldn't he believe it? I mean, now that I know he's your dad," (Janus made grimace at the thought of the stern Severus Snape ever being dad. Father was bad enough.) "I can see the resemblance between the two of you. You're not his spitting image but there are enough characteristics you got from him. Besides, your mother's left could help to make him believe."
"Are we talking about the same Severus Snape? The Snape who sees Harry Potter as the bane of his existence? And once I'm in the UK I'll have to look like the Boy Who Lived again anyway, so..." Janus shrugged helplessly as if saying "so what's the point?"
"Ian," Charlie replied thoughtfully. He could of course see and understand the fears the young wizard harboured and of course nothing of what he had heard or seen had suggested that Severus Snape held anything but negative feelings towards the dark haired wizard and the dragon handler wouldn't offer any false platitudes but he still thought that it would be wrong of Ian not to tell his father the truth. Because for him it didn't matter whether the Potions Master would be elated or appalled at the realisation that he had sired a son some 18 years ago. No for Charlie it was important what Ian wanted and from what he had heard, his companion very much wished to be united with his father. Therefore he said: "Forget about Snape and about what he wants for a moment. What do you want?"
A/N: Thanks again for your reviews.
I apologise for the cliff-hanger/s. I have to keep you on your toes somehow, don't I? :)
madamem: I can see your point and if there are more people finding it confusing, I can try to find some solution. However try also to see my point. Harry gives himself a new name upon his arrival at the preserve, Janus, but Charlie addresses him only as Ian. As the perspective changes, the name changes despite Harry, Janus and Ian being one and the same person.