Remus thanked his seldom seen lucky star that Halloween fell on a Sunday that year. Since the feast and every celebration would be on Sunday, that meant that he could take advantage of the Hogsmeade day Saturday, and spend all of Saturday setting up for his prank.
The castle would be nearly empty, and the first and second years were strongly encouraged to be outdoors on Hogsmeade days. Even better, he knew that James, Sirius, and Peter intended to visit Hagrid, the gamekeeper, that Saturday. Lily had organized a large study group that was meeting in one of the courtyards that day that included most Gryffindors, several Hufflepuffs, all of Ravenclaw, and even a few Slytherins. Remus could guarantee that no second years would bother him, and most suspicious teachers were supervising at Hogsmeade. Remus would essentially have the run of the castle, giving him the perfect opportunity to set up for his prank.
Remus had finalized his plan and was rather proud of it to be quite honest. He planned to launch the spell in several different hallways, but that led to problems of getting the timing of spells down correctly. But if it all worked correctly, it would be so brilliant that his roommates would have to forgive him! And if they didn't forgive him, well, it would just be safer for all involved.
The plan involved a small two foot square with Sirius' sticking spell in several hallways, the ceilings of all of these hallways iced, and a reversing gravitational spell. Remus imagined how wonderful it would seem if it all went correctly; one person who stepped in this two foot square would get stuck to the floor.
Then the timing spell would come into play, because after being stuck on the same spot of floor for twenty seconds, the gravitational reversal spell would kick in, and the person would go zooming to the iced ceiling.
If the ice on the ceiling reacted correctly with the sticking spell, the person should go sliding along the ceiling for several moments, completely stuck and unable to do anything to counteract it. They would zoom in one direction, and when they reached the end of the hallway, the spells would all release.
A cushioning charm would protect anyone from any real damage, and then the final spell would come into play. Remus was still stuck trying to figure out how to make it happen, but he wanted to try and color-charm the cushioning charm. It would be difficult, but Remus thought he could make it happen if he looked hard enough. A colored cushioning charm would ensure that he would know who all got stuck in the mess, and would tell him if any of his roommates had been caught by the trick tiles. Plus, everyone would be changed a different color, which was just an added bonus.
Remus could just only hope that it would all go correctly.
Remus' first order of business that Saturday morning was to go to the library, with hopes of finding a book on color-changing charms. For several hours, he studied under the librarian's strict gaze, reading every book about cushioning charms he could find, then, after lunchtime, moving onto to reading about color-changing charms.
Remus did know a couple of simple color-changing charms that any first or second year could do, and even one that made a person look as though they were covered in blood(James and Sirius had discovered that charm earlier in the month, and were particularly fond of using it on unwary students and teachers), but he knew the charm he would need had to be stronger than the pastels he could already produce.
Finally, after over two hundred pages worth of books about color-changing charms, Remus stumbled upon a passage that made his heart leap just a little bit.
'Some variations of color-changing charms could also be used, with spells actually being used in combination with other spells. These spells can be more difficult than most however, since the spell will actually require a transfer of energy. For example, an object can be charmed a different color with very little effort, and simply requires the right words spoken and the wand pointed correctly. But if one wished to transfer the color, such as anyone who touched a door handle turned yellow, this requires adaption of the spell due to the transferring energy rather from an object to a person rather than just from a wand to a person. This can be further complicated by trying to get the object to react to the color spell correctly, although for most objects, adding the word *adaption* and changing the color word of the spell to the ablative case should be sufficient.'
Remus read on for a little while longer, while a grin most would describe as devious spread across his face. This book, he thought, 'Impractical Charms and Transfigurations for Everyday Life', was pure gold.
~Cesso~
"Sirius!" James yelled, "Come on! We need to get this all finished before the feast will start!"
"I'm coming, I'm coming!" Sirius yelled back, hopping on one foot as he struggled to get his shoe on.
"Could you possibly be any slower?" James complained, typing his foot impatiently. "We do have a deadline."
"What are you, forty?" Sirius said, finally standing up. "Oh gee, I need to get these things finished before my deadline!" Sirius finished in a flustered squeaky voice.
"Oh can it. Pete, do you have the goods?"
"Peter! There is an "r" in my name!" Peter said as he came out of the bathroom, holding several rolls of toilet paper, balancing his wand on top of the mess.
"Sirius?" James turned to Sirius.
"I have located my materials," Sirius said, brandishing his wand and a packet of Droobel's best gum, while mentally reviewing the plans for the day.
First, they would stick the toilet paper to the walls using the gum, since no one but Remus(Lupin! If he was going to ignore them, he'd have to be Lupin, not Remus) was able to understand the complex spell Sirius had misused earlier that year. Then, it would be covered with some fake bats Sirius had discovered in James' trunk. Finally, the toilet paper would be unrolled just as Dumbledore's speech finished, and would hopefully land on everyone. Sirius hoped that they would be able to use wingardium leviosa to flick the toilet paper out. And that Peter would remember what they were doing.
They were sneaking down to the Great Hall after lunch had finished, since only the house elves would(hopefully) be in the room, preparing for the feast that night.
"All good?" James took one final look around at the group, before they all set out the door.
"This isn't going to be enough toilet paper," Sirius said as he really looked at how much Peter was holding.
"This was all that was in our bathroom!" Peter said in defense.
"Can we rob the bathrooms going down to the Hall?" Sirius asked James.
"Yeah. We should grab our school bags though, so we can have room to fit everything in. And be inconspicuous," James said after a moment of deliberation.
After a few more stalls and false starts, the boys finally left the room, each holding their school bag and leaving as inconspicuously as they could.
"We need to set up an alibi for us!" James hissed to Sirius right before they left the room.
Sirius thought for a moment. "We'll make it up as we go along. Don't worry."
James looked doubtful but agreed, as they tried to walk inconspicuously down the stairs.
"Inconspicuous inconspicuous inconspicuous inconspicuous," Peter was chanting behind Sirius as they walked.
"What in Merlin's name are you doing?" James asked, wheeling around on the stairs.
"Being inconspicuous," Peter answered. Sirius thought he sounded very inconspicuous about the whole deal, and thought James should just let them go.
"Right," James said. "Let's go."
"Hey James," Sirius said as they reached the common room, trying to be both inconspicuous and loud enough people would take notice, "we should go do homework at the library!"
"Wow Sirius, that's a great idea!" Peter chimed in.
"Let's go this moment then!" James said inconspicuously. Sirius thought that even though they were getting quite a few stares, they were doing very well with the whole "inconspicuous" thing.
They inconspicuously walked to the common room door, then ducked out of the door as quickly as they could.
~Cesser~
"I think that was inconspicuous," James said, after quickly glancing around the corridor.
"A few people stared at us, but I think we go the idea across," Sirius mentioned.
"What does it mean?" Peter asked.
"What does what mean?" James asked in return.
"Inconspicuous."
"Er, to be not noticed. To be subtle?" James said, wondering why Peter hadn't just asked the question before the walk through the common room.
"Pete, you could've just asked beforehand," Sirius said, echoing James' feelings on the idea.
"Peter! It's just one extra letter!"
"But it doesn't sound as snappy," James said.
"My name doesn't need to be snappy," Peter said.
"Why doesn't it?"
"Because it doesn't."
"That's circular reasoning," Sirius said.
"What?"
"Is it?" James asked Sirius.
"I think it is," Sirius replied.
"I hear someone," Peter interrupted.
"Bathroom is up on the left. Be inconspicuous," Sirius said, starting to jog. James followed behind, glancing back to make sure Peter was following.
"We need to take all of the toilet paper," James said as soon as they reached the bathroom.
"Right," Sirius said, walking to the first stall. "Er, James..."
"Yeah?"
"Hi there. What exactly are you up to?" Frank Longbottom said as he stepped out of the stall Sirius had been heading towards.
"Stealing toilet paper."
"Should I ask why?"
"It's probably safer if you don't," Sirius said, as he stuffed a few rolls into his bag. James continued filling his own bag while Frank went over to the sinks.
"Should I be wary of sticking to the walls or the floor or anything?"
"Not unless you often spontaneously become a roll of toilet paper!" Sirius said cheerfully from somewhere behind James.
"Pete, did you get enough?" James asked after absconding all of the toilet paper he could see. He knew Sirius would have taken plenty. Plus, they had another few bathrooms to rob still.
"Peter!"
"Yeah," James said with an eye roll. Pete was just...well, better!
"Yes, I'm good," Peter said after a moment.
"Right then fellows! We have more bathrooms to raid!" Sirius said.
"What are you doing?" Frank asked again as they walked to the door.
"You'll see!" James yelled as they shut the door behind them.
"That wasn't very inconspicuous," Peter pointed out.
"No, but it was Frank," James said. "We don't have to be inconspicuous around him."
"What about around the greasy Slytherin? What's his name, Snivellus?" Peter said with a tone of confusion, causing James and Sirius to break out into gales of laughter.
"Oh, that's gold Pete. I think his name's Snape though," Sirius said.
"We need to be inconspicuous near all Slytherins. They would all report us. Why would you bring him up though?" James asked.
"Well, he's walking up towards us. That Gryffindor girl is with him too," Peter said, squinting off into the distance. James looked too, and saw that sure enough, Evans and the greasy Slytherin that she was friends with were walking towards them.
"Next bathroom?" James said, looking towards Sirius. He had a photographic memory, James reasoned, so should be able to name the closest bathrooms. If he paid enough attention at least.
"At the end of this hallway, we turn to the right and go to the first door on the left," Sirius said absently.
"Then lets go!" James ordered, then added, "and be inconspicuous!"
They inconspicuously snuck down the hallway, and for the next six bathrooms they came upon, snuck out all of the toilet paper in the most inconspicuous manner anyone could imagine. In one bathroom, a fifth year Ravenclaw was practicing some complex water spell with one of the faucet, so James inconspicuously pretended to need to wash his hands. Finally, after washing his hands for a good few minutes, and Sirius and Peter also taking turns with slowly washing their hands, Sirius nodded inconspicuously to James, and they let all hell go loose.
A quick murmured spell at the closest stall to James, while Sirius did the same to the stall next to it, insured that the water started spurting out of the toilet. That was a really useful spell to have learned, James reflected.
The water raised up and starting soaking everything else in the room. While the Ravenclaw was distracted with trying to fix the toilets, Peter ducked under his arm and stole all of the paper before it got too wet. James and Sirius grabbed the rest, and they all inconspicuously vacated the room before the Ravenclaw started yelling at them.
Sticking rolls of toilet paper to the walls with gum, James soon learned, was incredibly hard. Even with two house elves, under the pretense they were helping put up some last minute decorations, helping.
"How many rolls did we end up grabbing?" James asked Sirius after putting up yet another, only to have it fall down on his face and unroll.
"About 125 or so," Sirius said, stooping down to help James clean up. It was a fairly good system they had going. Peter chewed the gum, James placed the toilet paper on the wall, and Sirius placed the bats overtop. The house elves were helping levitate James and Sirius, so they could place the prank up even higher on the walls.
"I don't think we have enough," Peter said after another few rolls were placed on the walls. Except for he had a ton of gum in his mouth, so it sounded something more like 'I enich wevg uff."
"Yes we do," Sirius said.
"No, there's no way we do," James said after actually looking at the hall. The Great Hall was, well, really quite great and big, and the bats and toilet paper barely made a dent.
"Where could we get more toilet paper from?" Sirius asked after looking around for a second.
"The girl's bathrooms," Peter said with ease.
It took James and Sirius approximately two seconds to look at each other and bolt out of the door.
~Cessare~
"Excuse me," Peter said to an older girl wearing a Hufflepuff uniform, wondering how James and Sirius had managed to convince him to be the pigmy puff, "but would you be able to see if anybody else is in there?"
"In the girl's restroom?" She said, blinking in surprise.
"Yes," Peter said, noticing how her eyes were casting about suspiciously. No, that was worry, she thought something might be wrong with him. Peter quickly recited the story Sirius had laid out for him a few minutes prior. "My friend was supposed to meet me down that corridor a half hour ago, and I was wondering if she had stopped in the bathroom."
"Sure, I'll be out in a minute and tell you then," she said easily after looking around for a moment, before walking into the door.
"Pete, you're doing great!" James called from the other end of the hallway.
"Peter!" Peter yelled back, hoping he couldn't be heard inside the bathroom.
"Right!" James yelled again before he turned around to talk to Sirius. Peter turned back towards the bathroom, tapping his foot and hoping the girl would come back out soon. And that she wouldn't ask him for the name of his friend.
"Well, there's only one girl in the bathroom," the older girl said as she opened the door.
"Really? What color is her hair?" Peter asked. Waiting out one girl would be easy enough, he figured.
"She has blonde hair, but I think she's in there for detention. She's busy cleaning some graffiti off of the stalls," the girl said, starting to walk away.
"Thank you very much!" Peter called after the girl. Mere moments later, Sirius and James flanked Peter's sides.
"So Pete-" Sirius started.
"Peter."
"-we think you did an awfully nice with that one," James finished.
"Why did I have to be the helpless little firstie?" Peter asked
"We don't look innocent enough," Sirius explained, leaning over to poke Peter in the nose.
"And Pete, you really have the innocent look down quite well!" James said, slinging an arm around both Peter's and Sirius's shoulders.
"Peter," Peter said, squirming a bit at the unexpected arm.
"Righto!" James said. "Now into this bathroom we go! As soon as that girl gets out, that is."
"She's supposedly serving detention," Peter reminded James.
"Hm," James mumbled as he thought for a moment, releasing his arm from around Peter to rub thoughtfully at his chin.
"Ok," James said after a moment of considering. "Pete, you stay here, and as soon as that girl gets out, you sneak in and steal the paper. Sirius and I will go on ahead to the next bathroom."
"We only have an hour left until the feast," Sirius said after looking at his watch.
"Then let's hurry!" James shouted before bursting down the hall, Sirius flailing behind him.
Peter stood and watched them go for a minute, before turning back to the bathroom. James and Sirius had had enough detentions cleaning out bathrooms for Peter to know the deal; the person goes to a bathroom, cleans the walls and graffiti and the like from twelve to two or two to four, then goes back to the classroom to write a sheet of lines. Not every detention was like that, Peter had had a few just writing lines, so the cleaning aspects seemed reserved for those who had done worse deeds. If the feast started in an hour...then it had to be about four now, right? The girl should be out of the bathroom at any minute then.
Sure enough, less than five minutes later a blonde girl with a sour expression holding a bucket exited the bathroom. Peter pretended to walk down the hall for a bit until he was sure the girl was out of sight, then turned right back around and walked into the girls bathroom.
The girl's bathroom, Peter soon learned, was a whole different ball game. There was soap with strange scents, clean floors, ceilings, and walls, and had only stalls.
And they had way more toilet paper. There was a few rolls in every one of the many many stalls, and there was even a little cabinet in one corner of the room with extra toilet paper helpfully stocked in it. Peter took every roll he could find, stuffing it all into his bag, then creeping over to the door. He started to ease the door open, peering out to make sure there was nobody coming. Nobody was, so Peter eased the door open the rest of the way, and rushed out.
~Cessar~
The feast was well underway, and Peter, Sirius, and James were all sitting next to each other. Due to the unexpected influx of so many kids at once crowding into the hall, Lily Evans, to James's delight, had to sit next to James.
Just a few seats away, Remus was sitting with a book in his lap, trying, and nearly failing, to hold back a grin. Peter, James, and Sirius all had colored spots, meaning that all three had been caught in the color trap at one point or another. If Remus would be able to let slip he had managed that prank, he was sure that his friends would accept him back into their group.
"James," Peter said in a low voice as soon as Evans was distracted, "when are we doing you know what?"
"I think when Dumbles finishes talking would be best. He always talks during important things, right? And Halloween is an important thing," James replied.
"Ok," Sirius said, "do we all know what we're doing?"
James and Peter nodded, not noticing Remus's ears perk up from a few seats down.
"Right. Say, do you-" James started, but just then, Dumbledore stood up and began speaking.
AN: Alright, I don't even know what I have to say for myself. It's been a year since I sat updated, and that's horribly pathetic on my part. So thank you everyone who is still reading this, and know that I really really appreciate your reviews and follows and the like! If it's any consolation, I have the next few chapters mapped out and such, and will, in all likelihood, have the next chapter finished by the middle of May, or even sooner! Thank you for reading!