Summer Lovin' & Serious Adjustments

by callmemrsmiller

Semi-follow up to 'Figuring It All Out'. Story based on the summer between S2 & S3 about how Jess and Nick navigate through their new relationship. Will it survive the summer? Nick is desperate to prove he's not a mess and can make this work. And Jess wants...well Jess just wants herself a lot of Nick Miller! Something to hopefully fill the void of the hiatus. Nick x Jess.

11. Two's Company, Three's

A/N: Hey guys! Given everything I've been reading online about tonight's episode (3x20 Mars Landing) being one of New Girls best I couldn't help but post a new chapter.

As always feedback is welcomed & more importantly needed! Love to get peoples thoughts/feelings on this one. It's maybe a little OOC for Nick but I got the idea from what he said to Julia back in Season 1 when they broke up. Anwyways I hope you guys enjoy.

Love always roomfriends!

---

"Would you look at this place?" Jess groaned staring at the sorry state of her post-party apartment.

It was true, the loft was a total mess, banners and bunting that had hung so proudly the previous day now lay ripped on the floor. There was trash everywhere, dirty cups, plates, empty beer and liquor bottles covering every available surface. And the smell…god it was awful.

"This is why I voted no party!" Nick grumbled walking towards the bottle and plastic cup fortress that currently enclosed the kitchen. "People come, get trashed, trash your place and leave you to clean up their food and garbage and vomit…"

"Ok, ok I get it Nick, thanks." Jess said covering her eyes.

Though she hadn't had that much to drink last night it was still enough (and the lack of sleep thanks to Nick) to give her a headache and justifiable desire not to clean up other people's vomit.

"Surely in all his insane military party planning Schmidt arranged some ninja-style clean up team or something." She mumbled collapsing onto the coach, which was covered in a number of various items of clothing.

It felt lumpy and uncomfortable; Jess didn't even want to think about what was beneath her.

"Nope." Nick called from the kitchen picking up a note perched atop a pile of paper plates. "Though he has left us a delightful little note."

Jess tossed her head back against the couch and groaned.

"Shall I read it to you?" Nick asked.

"No." Jess said covering her arm across eyes.

"Dear freeloaders…" Nick began in his best Schmidt impression. "…seeing as I so selflessly undertook both the financial andcreative burden of the spectacular and dazzling celebration of our nation's freedom…" Nick stopped, looking up. "Seriously who the hell talks…"

"Writes." Jess mumbled keeping her eyes covered.

"Writes, whatever." He shook his head before continuing. "…I shall therefore be leaving the post-party reconstruction to those more accustomed to manual labour, even Nick should be capable of operating a sponge…Son of a…" Nick grunted. "…signed yours faithful leader, Loft President Schmidt. Ps. There will be an inspection so get to it bitches."

"Eurghhhhh." Jess opened her eyes and surveying the epic mess around her once more. "It's too much Nick, I say we pack our bags and head for Mexico."

Nick chuckled, "Now you're talking Day."

Jess half-smiled, "Seriously where the hell do we start?"

"We don't, Mr. Loft President can get those other two morons to do it, they wanted the damn party." Nick grumbled. "Ya want tea?"

"Please." Jess said with a nod. Suddenly she felt a shift beneath her, her eyes widened in horror.

"Nick! Nick the couch is moving!" she yelled springing to her feet, hurriedly ripping away the left-behind jackets to uncover whatever was wriggling beneath her. "Winston?" she breathed relieved. "What the hell?"

Winston sat up slowly, stretching his arms up with a yawn. "Keep it down Jess, some people are trying to sleep."

"Why'd ya sleep out here?" Nick asked appearing next to Jess.

"After I gave up trying to get Coach out of that damn whale pool I was exhausted, I went to bed but it was already…occupied." He said with a grimace.

"Occupied?" Jess asked naively causing Nick to roll his eyes.

"Yes occupied." Winston said gruffly. "By two very busy and loud people, so I crashed here."

"Ew, sorry." Jess said tossing the jackets back down on the coach.

Winston shrugged, "It's ok. Actually I met someone last night."

Nick and Jess exchanged astonished but genuinely happy looks.

"Wow, really? That's great man." Nick said. "Who is she?"

"Well I don't actually know her name." Winston replied.

"Ahhhh I get it." Jess said with a wink. "The sexy stranger thing, Nick and I do that sometimes, he likes to pretend he's a matador called Carlos."

"Jessica!" Nick hissed.

Winston shook his head, "Not exactly."

Nick and Jess shared slightly worried looks.

"Winston, this woman, she is…you know, real?" Nick asked making an anxious face. "Like everyone else can see her, not just you right?"

"I'm not crazy Nick!" Winston yelled. "She was real and beautiful, she had long blonde hair and she was wearing this cute top with pineapples on it. Which is perfect because you know how much I like pineapples…"

"Sure, sure." Nick said sarcastically.

"So did you talk to her?" Jess asked knowing what the answer would be.

"Well no." Winston said still smiling. "But I did watch her and you know…follow her for a little while."

"So you stalked this pineapple woman?" Nick asked not surprised at all.

Winston shrugged, "If you wanna put a label on it."

"I'm pretty sure that's the label a judge would put on it." Nick snorted.

"Nick!" Jess scolded.

"C'mon, tell me this isn't creepy?" Nick asked.

Jess didn't answer instead she turned back to Winston, always the positive roommate. "This sounds great Winston; you should try and find out who she is."

"Where would I even start?" Winston asked with a contemplative sigh.

"Hey why don't you clear up all this…" Nick said pointing around him. "And see if you find any pineapples, it could be a clue." He added mockingly.

Winston frowned, "Funny. Don't think I didn't hear all that about Schmidt's note, you two are not running off to Mexico and leaving me and Coach to clear up this crap."

Nick opened his mouth to make another snappy comment about how he didn't even want the damn party in the first place when Jess cut him off.

"Speaking of Coach why do you go and wake him up." she said nodding to Winston. "Nick and I will make coffee and we can figure out operation clean up over eggs."

"Fine." Winston relented tossing his jacket covers aside. "I want pancakes too."

"Done." Jess said with a nod.

Winston got to his feet, slowly shuffling towards Nick's/Coach room.

"Fine work there Day." Nick said wrapping his arms around her waist.

Jess smiled, "I said we'd figure out a plan I never said we were the ones clearing it up." she said with a giggle wrapping her arms around his neck. "I'm still thinking pancakes, then Mexico."

Nick chuckled, "Or we could stay north of the border tonight and I could take you out."

"Oh really?" Jess said her smile growing.

Nick nodded, "Make up for the past couple days, somewhere real fancy with tables and chairs and maybe even a salad bar. What d'ya say, date night tonight?"

"How could I resist?" Jess said leaning up to kiss him.

Grinning Nick kissed her back, his mind suddenly going into overdrive as he tried to come up with somewhere to take her, his thoughts interrupted by an ear piercing shriek. Both turned to see Winston standing in the doorway of Nick's room staring inside absolutely horrified. Nick and Jess looked back to each other.

"I'm guessing Coach was also occupado last night." Jess said raising her eyebrows.

Nick grinned, "C'mon."

He tugged her hand, eager to find out what poor girl could have been desperate enough to end up with Coach the state he was in last night. They reached the door to find Coach sitting up against the wall bare-chested, looking both sheepish and impressed with himself at the same time. In the bed beside him was clearly the figure of another person, but one completely covered with Nick's faded bed sheet.

"Mornin'." Coach said waving his hand, looking uncomfortable.

"Mornin'." Nick grinned. "Who's ya friend?"

"Go away." Coach said in response.

"C'mon Coach we're all friends here, don't be embarrassed." Nick laughed turning to Winston. "Winston, who's the lucky lady?"

Coach gave Winston an angry glare shaking his head vigorously.

"I…um…" Winston.

Nick's eyes went wide as he turned to Jess. "It's someone we know!"

"C'mon Nick, let's leave these poor lovebirds…" she tugged on his arm when something caught her eye on the floor.

There amongst the mess of Nick's usual clutter and Coach's clothes was a very familiar looking stars and stripes bikini top. Without a word Jess marched past Nick and Winston snatching the top in her hands before she looked directly at Coach, the look in his eyes was all the confirmation she needed.

Nick's laughter faded, "Jess?"

Jess didn't answer, slowly with a pained look she walked to the bed and pulled the sheet back just enough to see the face of the hiding figure, eliciting an astounded gasp from Nick and groan of angst from Winston.

---

"What the hell were you thinking?" Jess yelled waving her arms frantically.

"I wasn't thinking anything!" CeCe protested. "I didn't plan this Jess!"

Jess shook her head furiously as she watched her friend scramble around Nick's room, dressed in her grass skirt and one of Coach's Pistons t-shirts. She looked completely ridiculous but this was not the time to make fun of her, this was the time to yell.

"Clearly!" Jess snapped.

Jess had sent the guys into the living room so she could talk to CeCe but she was still in a state of shock.

"CeCe how did this…when did you even…what…" Jess stammered. "How?"

"I don't know." CeCe said. "I went back to the roof to drown by sorrows and Coach was at the bar. He'd fallen in the pool or something…we got talking and he told me about how his girlfriend had broken up with him for some other guy…"

"What?" Jess said shocked, Nick hadn't mentioned that. "Not important, carry on."

CeCe sighed, "So we had a few drinks and talked about how crappy it is seeing your ex with someone else. Then we did some shots and then we…"

"Did each other? Ew." Jess closed her eyes. "CeCe do you realise how bad this is?"

"Yes Jess I'm not an idiot!" CeCe snapped back.

Jess scoffed pointing to Nick's rumpled bed sheets, mentally noting to burn those later. "I very much beg to differ." She raised her hand to her forehead. "How are you going to tell Schmidt?"

CeCe looked astounded, "I am not telling Schmidt, are you crazy?"

"You can't keep this a secret, everyone knows!" Jess yelled frantically. "Including Nick, there is no way sweatback will be able to handle this! He could die from the dehydration!"

"Jessssssssssssssssssssssss!" Nick's panicked voice yelled from the living room.

Jess and CeCe both stood frozen, eyes wide.

"Stay here." Jess barked at CeCe, dreading what could possibly be waiting for her.

In the living room Coach and Winston were both sat on the couch amongst the party mess whilst Nick was standing by the front door, an anxious look on his face.

"What now?" Jess asked.

Nick nodded towards the door in response, Jess 's own eyes widening in shock as she saw Sadie standing before her, a bright, hopeful almost frightening smile on her face, baby Ella clutched in her arms.

"Sadie hey…what are you doing here?" She asked pointlessly knowing the answer.

Sadie's wide scary smile grew, "Ella and I would like to take you up on that babysitting offer!"

"Now?" Jess croaked.

Sadie's jubilant grin faded slightly, "You said anytime."

"I did and I meant it." Jess said hurriedly, "I thought maybe next weekend or something, not like…now." She said turning to Nick for help.

"Yeah, this place is a mess." He said stepping forward. "There's beer and garbage everywhere, not to mention this place is nowhere near baby-proofed…"

Sadie waved her hands flippantly, "Please she'll spend most of the day asleep in her stroller."

Jess let out an exasperated sigh, "Sadie I'm sorry I can't…"

Sadie nodded, "It's ok, I get it, I shouldn't have just shown up like this. It's just we had to leave so early yesterday and Mel found the spa gift certificates her mom brought for our anniversary. They're going to expire next week and we thought we'd never get to go but then you said yesterday…maybe it would be nice to have some time, just us, for a few hours…" her voice trailed off as she looked sadly at her daughter "It's fine Jess really, I should have called first. They'll be other days…say bye-bye to Auntie Jess." she said waving Ella's hand for her.

Jess knew exactly what Sadie was doing and she knew she shouldn't let it get to her, this wasn't her fault but being Jess she couldn't help it. As Sadie turned to go Jess looked to Nick who was shaking his head furiously at her, mouthing 'No'. Jess gave a small shrug admitting defeat.

"Sadie wait." She said ignoring the livid expression on Nick's face. "I can watch her for a couple of hours."

Sadie spun back to her immediately, smiling her terrifying smile again. "Really? Only if you're sure?"

"I'd love to." Jess replied with a fleeting smile. A trashed apartment, a bed-hopping best friend and potential roommate disaster, could a baby really be that much worse?

"Great!" Sadie squealed immediately handing Ella to Jess.

"Oh…right ok…hey there." Jess said awkwardly trying to find the best way to hold Ella as she wriggled in her arms.

"Here's her bag…" Sadie said handing Nick what Jess thought could quite easily be a small suitcase as she ran through its varied and confusing sounding contents, including wipes, diapers and fresh clothes. Nick nodded along as though he understood what Sadie was telling him, Jess however felt completely lost.

"…her stroller…and play mat…" Sadie said handing Nick more and more stuff. "She likes to play with the fluffy animals, especially Charlie Chick and Betsy Bear but if she gets fussy the pink bunny is the only thing that works. Do not lose it." she said sternly placing a bag full of brightly coloured stuff animals in his grasp as though she'd just handed Nick the Holy Grail.

Jess nodded, trying to keep up with what she was sure was vital information came at her. "Chick and bear for play, bunny for fussy. Got it."

Sadie smiled, "There's a card in the bag with all the emergency numbers, our paediatrician, my parents etc as well as her nap and feeding times." She paused. "Oh and she likes to be sung to when she's tired, right now she's really into Katy Perry."

Nick snorted, "I'm not singing Katy Perry to anyone."

Jess scowled. "It's fine, we'll be fine…right…" she said looking to Ella as though the three month old might actually respond. "We'll be fine…it'll be fun." Trying to convince herself more than anything.

"You'll be great." Sadie said smiling. "I'll pick her up around two?"

Jess nodded, mentally setting a countdown timer in her brain, five hours? What the hell was she going to do with a baby for five hours?

Sadie apparently either didn't notice Jess's anxiety or simply decided to ignore it, leaning forward to kiss Ella on the head. "Bye-bye sweetness, be a good girl for Auntie Jess and Uncle Nick. Stay away from Uncle Schmidt."

Jess was taken aback by hearing their names put together like that, despite the fear and panic slowly spreading through her body she liked how it sounded.

"Bye guys." Sadie said brightly waving to the others and in a flash she was gone, the door shut behind her, her speedy footsteps sprinting down the hall.

The instant Sadie vanished from site Ella began to wail, wriggling furiously in Jess's hold.

Jess tried to calm her, "Shhhhh it's ok, mommy's not gone she's just…not here."

Surprisingly her words did little to soothe the child who continued to cry, getting increasingly louder and worked up. Jess turned to Nick with a desperate look to see him standing clutching a mass of baby stuff, looking decidedly unimpressed with his girlfriend.

"Jessica…" he growled.

"I know Nick ok but I couldn't say no could I?" she declared already too stressed to get into an argument with him about this.

"Like this; NO." Nick tossed the baby bag roughly down on the floor. "It's a pretty easy word Jess, I'm sure even Elle…"

"Ella." Jess corrected.

Nick nodded moving closer, "Ella, knows it. Hey kid what do you say when someone dumps their baby on a bunch of hung-over and tired people with no notice?"

Ella's cry grew louder and sharper at his words, painfully ringing in their ears. Nick pulled back at the piercing sound, Jess covering the distressed infant's ears.

"Shhh Nick! You're upsetting her." Jess said trying to soothe Ella whose wail was now accompanied with tiny baby tears. "Oh no baby, shhhh its ok."

"Jess can you turn that thing off or down or somethin'." Winston yelled over her howls. "Some of us didn't get much sleep last night."

"That's riiiiiiight." Coach said raising his hand to Winston.

"No, no! No high-five for you!" Nick yelled slapping Coach's hand away. "Winston didn't sleep because he was on the couch obsessing over his pineapple top dream woman not sleeping with Schmidt's ex-girlfriend and trying to tear this loft apart!"

"Calm down Nick!" Jess snapped, she could only deal with one angry baby at a time. "You're already starting to sweat!"

"I'm very stressed Jessica!" he yelled back wiping his hand across his forehead.

"I thought I heard a baby." CeCe said as she appeared from Nick's room, Coach practically leapt into the air at the sight of her. "Hey Ella…" CeCe said smiling at the still crying child. "What's wrong with her?"

"She's fine." Jess barked, bobbing Ella in her arms, she swore this was supposed to work. "She's just missing her mommy that's all..."

"Also did I hear you say something about a girl in a pineapple top?" CeCe asked looking to the guys.

Winston now sprung to his feet. "Yes, do you know her?"

CeCe nodded, "She's an assistant at my modelling agency, I invited her to the party because she's new in town. Her name's Kate."

Winston smiled, "What an exotic name."

"Yeah…" CeCe said looking a little unnerved. "Anyways I can give her your number if you like. She's really sweet, a little…quirky."

"Quirky?" Nick asked wondering if she was Jess-quirky or crazy cat lady-quirky. Though the second might be more Winston's type nowadays.

"Nothing too weird but like she makes these sock puppet things…and she's really into puzzles." CeCe said.

Winston's face lit up at her words as Coach, Nick and Jess all exchanged flabbergasted looks. Jess had gradually begun to calm the sobbing Ella when the loud and unmistakable voice of Schmidt singing We Didn't Start the Fire filled the hallway.

"Hide!" Nick hissed waving his arms frantically. "Not you Winston!" he snapped as Winston tried to hide under the coffee table before fleeing to his now unoccupied bedroom.

"CeCe!" Jess whispered pointing to her bedroom as the sound of keys jingled outside the door.

Looking absolute terrified CeCe sprinted into Jess room Coach immediately followed, Nick tried to call him back but the loft door slowly opened as Jess's clicked shut.

Bopping his head from side to side Schmidt swayed inside, tugging his earphones out still stinging to himself. He was in his work out gear, his skin still covered with a sweat sheen clearly having been to the gym, no one could deny this guy was committed to his fitness regime.

"Schmidt! My man, my buddy!" Nick cried far too excitedly. "Been working out I see, pumping iron, pressing benches, stretching…things?"

Schmidt frowned at Nick's unusually chipper interest in his workout, "Yes Nick for those of us actually concerned with our aesthetic appeal, exercise consists of more than rolling from the fridge to the couch." He said sharply. "The musical genius of the late Mr. Joel never fails to make me pump hard."

Nick's face morphed into a frown as he fought the urge to yell both jar and tell Schmidt for the millionth time that Billy Joel was still alive!

"Well you look great; fantastic really…you're a beautiful man Schmidty…inside and out." He rambled.

Schmidt eyed his roommate apprehensively, he turned to Jess hoping to gain some semblance of sense when he visibly jumped back.

"What is that?" he barked pointing at a still fussy but thankfully no longer crying Ella. "Please tell me you two are not breeding."

Jess rolled her eyes, "Don't be ridiculous Schmidt, I'm watching her for Sadie, just for a few hours."

"Hmmmm." Schmidt said clearly unconvinced. "Just keep it away from my new Italian loafers."

"She's a baby not an it Schmidt and she's not a dog!" Jess said her arms starting to ache from holding Ella.

Schmidt shrugged, "Where's Coach?"

Jess almost dropped the poor child there and then at his question, whilst the sweat began to pour off Nick's head.

"Coach? Why? What…" Nick stumbled, his voice croaky. "Coach…well I…you know he…"

"He's out!" Jess yelled a little too loud causing Ella to flinch and squeal in her hold. "Shhhhh sorry. Yeah he's out, at that place…with the thing…" she said looking to Nick hoping he'd come up with something a little less terrible.

"Yes! The thing, really important thing…at that place…with the people." Nick said looking very proud of himself as Jess rolled her eyes.

"Are you both still drunk?" Schmidt asked shaking his head. "Who in their right mind would leave their child in your care?"

Both Jess and Nick laughed hysterically at his words causing Schmidt to actually take a step away from them.

"Why do you want Coach anyway?" Nick asked still laughing nervously.

"Well after my advance booty pump class I found out Chuck, one of the personal trainer's gluttonous sloths like you…" Schmidt said pointing to Nick. "…need is leaving. Some unfortunate incident involving undeclared amphetamines and the Mexican border police. So there's a job opening."

"And you thought of Coach?" Jess said her voice trembling slightly.

Schmidt nodded, "Of course he's my boy. And he's the best trainer I know." Schmidt said genuinely. "Besides I know he's been having a hard time with the whole Malia thing, I thought it would be good for him to come back to LA, be with his friends again. Why are you both looking at me like that?"

Schmidt looked up to see both Nick and Jess staring at him distraught and saddened looks on their faces.

Nick nodded, "You're a good friend Schmidt."

Schmidt looked unsettled by the genuine sincerity in Nick's voice.

"Thank you for acknowledging that Nicholas." He said, something seriously weird was going on here, maybe it was to do with the baby, Schmidt shook it off. "Just tell me when Coach gets back, from that thing, at that place, with those people."

Shaking his head he walked away from them heading towards the kitchen as Jess and Nick shared a silent, panic mental conversation; they had to get Schmidt out of the living room and CeCe out of the loft, now.

"Aren't you going to shower?" Jess called after him.

"Jessica surely you know by post-gym routine by now." Schmidt huffed at her insolence. "Its protein shake, post-workout selfies, muscle measurement and then shower! Honestly."

Jess scowled at his usual rudeness looking back to Nick who began attempting to communicate in military style hand gestures Jess had never understood let alone with an irritable baby in her arms.

"Nice to see you guys got my note about cleaning up." Schmidt barked from the kitchen surveying the untouched mess.

"We'll get right on it!" Nick yelled tugging Jess towards her bedroom. "We just need to go…do something in Jess's room."

"Really Nick you can't do that in front of a child!" Schmidt said disgusted.

Nick opened his mouth to yell back at Schmidt when Jess cut him off.

"Ok you get Schmidt into the shower…" she whispered hurriedly.

"Without a doubt the worst thing you've ever asked me to do." Nick grumbled.

"I'm not asking you to jump in and scrub his hard to reach places, just distract him so I can get CeCe out!" she hissed causing Ella to whine. "Oh no…shhh you're ok, you're ok…I think all of this is making her stressed."

"Her?" Nick asked incredulous.

---

This was one of the most awkward situations in which Jess had ever found himself, sat on her bed between Coach and CeCe, neither of whom spoke or so much looked in the direction of the other. The unbearable silence broken only by the continued whines and whimpers of Ella, who despite all Jess's best efforts just would not settle.

Jess tried bouncing her lightly on her lap hoping somehow she would be able to soothe her and tried not to let her continuing failure get to her. Jess always assumed she'd be great with babies, a natural, she was a teacher after all, looking after kids was her job! The truth was she didn't have that much experience with babies, she didn't have any nieces or nephews and Sadie was the first of her friends to have a child. And now as Jess was quickly discovering out babies were not so easy. What if Jess wasn't a natural? What if she was just one of those people babies didn't like? The thought was too horrible for Jess to even contemplate and given the drama currently unfolding she pushed it from her mind.

"What's taking so long?" CeCe whined. "I thought Nick was going to distract him."

"He is!" Jess snapped rising to her feet, struggling to keep a hold of Ella.

"Schmidt's selfies can sometimes take a while. There's a lot of poses." Coach murmured still not looking at CeCe.

Jess nodded as she began to slowly pace back and forth gently swaying with Ella. "Ok sweetie, shhh…"

"Maybe she's hungry." CeCe suggested.

Jess shook her head, "I don't think so, Sadie's instructions said her next feed isn't until eleven."

"Maybe she took a dump." Coach said.

"How eloquently put." Jess sighed.

Coach shrugged, "Sniff her butt. That's what my sisters do when their kids are bitching like that."

Jess frowned at him, despite his crude description she couldn't deny his words made sense. Tentatively and praying he was wrong Jess lent down and sniffed.

"Oh my god!" she croaked trying not to gag.

"Told ya, dump." Coach said triumphantly.

Jess dashed forward, carefully setting Ella on the end of her bed kneeling anxiously in front of her. Panic swept through her entire body, she'd never changed a diaper before, she didn't even know where to start.

"You ok Jess? You kinda look like you're about to throw up?" CeCe asked.

"I'm fine." Jess said shortly, taking a deep breath, she could do this.

Doing her best to keep Ella distracted and entertained, Jess decided to wing it and carefully took her cute pink kitty printed leggings off and gagged. The smell was beyond horrific; a foul stench unlike anything Jess had smelt before. It took all of her willpower not to vomit all over poor baby Ella.

"Oh my god!" CeCe yelled covering her nose and jumping backwards as Coach looked on revolted.

Jess ignored them, needing to stay calm as she slowly untied the diaper, gagging again, nothing able prepared her for what was to come.

"Jess it's everywhere!" CeCe squealed.

"Yes I can see that CeCe!" Jess barked. CeCe was right, there was poop everywhere, her diaper was covered, all down her thighs, up her back, on her onesie, no wonder the poor kid was so pissed off. "Get some wipes!"

CeCe hastily threw a packet of baby-wipes at her, quickly backing away again as Jess struggled to open them whilst keeping a hold of Ella who now decided it was a great time to move.

"Ew Jess look she's rubbing herself in it!" CeCe said pointing frantically.

"Like a pig in…" Coach said with a chuckle.

"Don't!" Jess yelled. "CeCe help me!"

"How?" CeCe asked absolutely mortified by the idea. "Jess, babies aren't exactly my thing…"

"Just hold her so I can clean this up!" Jess roared back.

Looking genuinely frightened CeCe edged closer, her face twisted into a nauseated look as she gently held Ella still whilst keeping herself as far away from the danger end as possible.

"You should call Nick." Coach suggested. "He's good at all this baby crap. Ha, no pun intended."

"Pa!" Jess snorted as she grabbed more wipes.

If she was struggling this bad there was no way in hell Nick would stand a chance. Nick Miller and babies? She didn't think so.

"I got it, I got it." she insisted, flashing Ella a slightly wild smile, talking in a high-pitched baby voice. "Isn't that right Ella? Auntie Jess will get you alllllll nice and clean and then…"

"Oh my god Jess…she's peeing!" CeCe screamed leaping back from the bed.

Jess stared down completely overwhelmed as baby Ella peed all over her newly purchased bed-sheets, more of a mess now than when Jess had started. With a broken sigh Jess put her hand to her head, she wanted to cry, why was this so difficult? She just couldn't do it, she couldn't look after a baby, she was going to have to call Sadie and then maybe look into having her tubes tightened.

As Ella finally stopped peeing and rolling around in her own mess she let out another deafening scream at the top of her lungs. Jess was about to throw in the towel and join her, tears burning in her eyes when the door flew open.

"Jess, are you ok?" Nick asked dashing to her side, worry clear in his voice.

"I c-can't do it Nick…" Jess blubbered pointing to the catastrophe around her. "It's t-too hard…"

"Shhh it's ok." He said reassuringly, Jess wasn't entirely sure if he was talking to her or the baby. "I'll help."

Jess collapsed back on the floor tears of frustration flowing freely down her face suddenly aware of another figure standing in the doorway. Schmidt wasn't concerned with the screaming baby or clearly distraught Jess, his focus solely on the other two people in the room, neither of whom could look him in the eye.

---

"The yelling's stopped…again." Jess, now washed, dressed and much calmer, murmured leaning her head against her bedroom door.

The heartbroken look on Schmidt's face as he stared at CeCe in Coach's shirt was almost too much for Jess in her already distressed state. Schmidt had immediately fled the room, Coach and CeCe behind him both yelling their own apologies and explanations. Within seconds it had erupted into angry yells and shouts, Schmidt declaring Coach had committed the cardinal sin against the guy-code.

Anxious as to how far things could escalate Jess asked Nick if they should go help but he correctly pointed out they had their hands full with a messy baby and that they were better off staying the hell out of it. That had been twenty minutes ago, since there had been more yelling and shouting, followed by eerie quiet periods, then crying which Jess thought may have been CeCe but Nick said they couldn't rule out Schmidt or Coach.

Unable to handle the not knowing, Jess had snuck a quick peek on her way to the bathroom after she heard CeCe's voice roaring far louder than the guys. Jess couldn't quite make what Schmidt had said to make CeCe so infuriated but through the door it sounded a lot like flying stamp. Jess saw CeCe was on her feet indignantly insisting they had done nothing wrong. Schmidt had broken up with her; he was with Elizabeth, why did he even care? Schmidt only looked away, unable to answer her. CeCe roared she was done, Schmidt could keep on lying to himself if he wanted to but he had no right to make her feel bad. Jess had tried to intervene, to talk to her best friend before she said something she would regret but CeCe had insisted she could handle this and shushed Jess away.

Jess had understood, truthfully not sure how she could have helped, this situation was already beyond complicated. So Jess had headed off to the bathroom to clean up, leaving to two men behind at CeCe's mercy, in a tense and uncomfortable stalemate and just hoped things would work out.

"Maybe they left." He answered with shrug.

Jess shook her head and pressed her ear harder against the door, "No I can still hear them, they're just quieter."

"Long as there's no more crying. That was getting on my last nerve." He said grumpily, he voice changing instantly as he asked. "What about you kiddo?"

Immediately Jess spun around at the question even though she knew it wasn't directed at her. It, like almost all of Nick's attention of the past twenty minutes at been directed at the other female in the room and for once Jess was not at all jealous. With a content smile she watched Nick pull silly faces at Ella whilst he rested back on Jess's freshly changed bed, feeding her.

Jess still couldn't believe it, Coach had been right; Nick was good at this 'baby stuff', better than good as it turned out, amazing. Jess was still in shock herself. Not only had Nick cleaned Ella and changed her diaper, he also dressed her, calmed her down and was now feeding her without having a total breakdown and traumatising the poor child. He even managed to make her smile! Whilst Ella's dimpled baby smile was cute the beaming look on Nick's face was almost enough to make Jess's heart explode. It was completely unexpected but in the most incredible way, it was like Jess was discovering this whole other side to Nick.

Ella however still seemed to be less than relaxed with Jess, returning to her fussy unsettle grumblings for the tense five minutes Nick left them alone to get dressed. Jess stood in the a statue-like manner the entire time he was gone, fearful of making any movements which could possibly anger the child further, letting out the deepest sigh of relief upon Nick's return, immediately returning Ella to his strong and quite possibly magical baby soothing arms.

In awe Jess watched as Ella finished her bottle and how effortlessly Nick rose from the bed, flinging a towel over his shoulder before he slowly began to pace back and forth, gently rubbing Ella's back. It all seemed so natural, as though he'd done it a hundred times, soon Ella had let out the softest belching noise.

"That'a girl. Better out than in." Nick said in the softest voice Jess had ever heard, genuine pride etched on his face. It was so adorable Jess could actually feel her womb glow.

"Ok I have to know Nick." Jess finally asked, unable to contain her curiosity any longer. "What the hell is this?"

Nick turned to face her still gently stroking Ella's back, a confused turtle expression on his face. "What?"

Jess frowned teasingly. "Don't what me Miller. How come you never told me you were Chicago's answer to Mary Poppins?"

Nick rolled his eyes. "I'm not, kids just kinda like me that's all." He said casually.

"Nick." Jess protested as Ella let out another faint burp. "C'mon."

Nick looked at Jess who was standing hand on hip; blue eyes unblinking, her I've got purse full of hard candy and can do this all day look on her face.

"Fine." He conceded with a sigh, shifting Ella ever so gently in his arms. "I guess I've was just always around kids and babies growing up, oldest kid with a lot of brothers, even more cousins. Our house was always full of kids…" he said with a faint but warm smile.

Jess couldn't help but return it, she loved it when Nick spoke about his family, it was like a teeny peek into the world of Nick Miller before she knew him and as he offered it so rarely she was always excited to learn more. She'd learnt the best way to get Nick to open up (other than sex) was not to push too hard, let it happen in his own time. Therefore Jess simply gave a quick nod of understanding before Nick continued.

"…when I was in junior high Walt had to go away for a little while…a business deal gone wrong…" The fond smile faded slightly as Nick spoke about his father. "…anyways money was tighter than usual so my mom starting watching a few kids in the neighbourhood, then a few more and before you knew it The Miller house had become the West Fillmore Street unofficial day care centre…" he let out a small laugh. "I used to help out sometimes after school, Winston too until this one kid Ritchie Davis bit him."

Jess let out a throaty laugh.

Nick frowned slightly, "Why are you shocked?"

Jess nodded, "It's definitely…unexpected."

Nick shrugged, "It's weird; with pets, plants and those annoying tamagotchi things everyone used to be crazy about I totally freak out that I might lose it or sit on it or something but babies…" his words trailed off as he looked at Ella with the most endearing smile. "…I dunno, they're not so bad."

"Not so bad at all." Jess replied quietly.

She took a moment to just watch the two of them, absolutely beaming at Nick Miller standing with a baby in his arms unable to silence that voice in the back of her mind that whispered hopefully…someday. Nick seemed to sense her staring and looked up.

"Here." He said edging towards her, gently holding Ella out to her.

Jess's smile faded instantly, shaking her head vehemently.

"No, no, no she's better with you. We've already discovered you're the baby whisperer…" Jess said trying to back away before her back hit the door.

"C'mon Jess, take her." Nick said in a soft whisper. "Just rock her in your arms gently and she'll go straight to sleep."

"Nick really, she looks perfectly happy where she is…" Jess protested as though Nick was about to hand her a nuclear device. "Let's not make her mad."

Nick pulled back making a bemused turtle face. "She's a baby Jess not the Hulk."

Jess let out a dubious snort, "She doesn't like me."

Now Nick looked a little mad, "That's crazy."

"Is it? Then why does she scream and cry every time I hold her?" Jess whispered sadly. "I don't know what to do with babies Nick, I'm not like you, before today I don't even know the last time I even held a baby!"

Nick shook his head, careful not to disturb the baby drifting off in his hold. "Jess you work with kids every day, you're an amazing teacher."

Jess couldn't help the small blush that appeared at his words but still gave a small shake of her head.

"This isn't the same Nick. My students are all eleven years old, they can talk and tell me what they need, what I'm supposed to do…" her voice trailed off as she looked at the now almost sleeping baby. "…Ella just yells at me."

Nick let out a soft chuckle. "C'mere." He said nodding towards him. "Put your arms out…"

Jess tentatively stepped forward and did as he asked. Gently Nick placed Ella in her arms so her head resting in the crook of Jess's left arm. Jess went rigid the instant Nick pulled his arms away, she stood fixed trying not to shake, terrified she would do something to distress the now content baby. Nick saw how nervous she was, placing his hand on her shoulder, the warmth of his touch slightly calming her terror.

"Relax Jess, she's fine." He said reassuringly. "Now just move a little from side to side, sway her up and down."

Jess nodded and did as he asked or at least tried. She still felt so uneasy practically swinging the poor child back and forth like a Frisbee she was about to throw causing Ella to understandably grumble at her movements.

"Not that fast or she'll spew all over ya…" Nick muttered stepping behind Jess, wrapping his arms around her, moving them with hers as she held Ella. "Slow and steady…gently…"

Jess nodded and slowed her movements, letting Nick's arms guide her. His whispered words and body so close to hers stirring something inside her, it wasn't sexual but it felt incredibly intimate all the same. Jess could feel her heart thundering in her chest.

As gently as she could Jess swayed her body, Ella continued to writhe and wriggle at first, whimpering slightly but soon she seemed to calm, nuzzling her face closer into Jess's body. Jess watched intently as her breathing began to grow slower and shallower, her heavy eyes fighting against her tiredness.

"That's it, like that." Nick breathed against her ear.

"Is this one of those sports movie things?" Jess whispered softly, her gaze still fixed on the almost sleeping figure in her arms.

Nick let out a soft laugh into Jess's hair, the sound vibrating though her body a smile appearing on her face. With Nick's arms still loosely draped around her Jess continued her movements a little while longer before sleep finally won out, Ella's eyes fluttered closed and her breathing evened out into the most adorable snore Jess had ever heard.

"I did it!" Jess whispered excitedly. "She's asleep."

"Here." Nick whispered back nodding for Jess to follow him.

Moving as carefully as she could manage Jess glided towards Ella's stroller and delicately set her down, desperate to disturb her. Despite one tiny squeak and stretch as Jess's hands left her Ella stayed asleep. Jess felt a mixture of utter relief and elation flood through her.

As Jess beamed down at Ella she became aware that Nick's eyes were fixated solely on her, staring at her in that way that made her heart race and her skin burn. Again it wasn't sexual or lustful, but the look in Nick's eyes felt just as powerful, he stared at Jess with such tenderness and affection she had never felt before. That same voice in the back of her mind spoke up again, though this time a little louder, someday, it said, someday this could be real…this could be ours.

A string of images suddenly flashed through Jess's mind; a little house in one of those cul-de-sac neighbourhoods with a novelty mailbox, a Labrador retriever puppy with a red collar and mischievous nature, summer picnics in Griffith Park, red embroidered home-knitted stockings hung up at Christmas. Along with every image was Nick, he'd been there for a while now, whenever Jess pictured her future but now she found herself wondering who else might be there one day. Despite herself, despite knowing it was crazy to think about so soon and would absolutely petrify Nick, Jess couldn't help but picture the small boy with messy brown hair and the biggest blue eyes and the girl with dark pigtails in a polka dot dress and Nick's half-smile.

Jess was pulled suddenly from her fantastical daydream as she felt Nick's hand reach for hers on the edge of the stroller. Nick said nothing as he tugged her gently towards him and kissed her. The kiss wasn't hard or desperate but Jess still felt her body tremble at the feel of his lips.

"Jess…" Nick murmured breathlessly as he pulled back, one hand still softly cupping her face. "There's something I need to sa…"

Jess actually gulped at the shaking tone of his voice, something inside telling her this could be it, this could be that moment. Her heart thundered so hard and fast in her chest she was sure Nick could hear it over the soft sleeping wheezing of Ella beside them.

"I…" he said once more.

"Owwwwwwwwwwwwwww!" Coach's voice suddenly screamed breaking the moment.

"Here take your thirty pieces of silver you Judasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!" Schmidt's voice roared through the wall.

"Schmidt!" Coach roared back. "Stop throwing quarters at me you lunatic!"

"Well then let me throw you some of these…" Schmidt yelled furiously quickly followed by a loud crashing sound, breaking of glass and a thundering clang all of which was more than enough for Ella to awake with an ear-shattering wail.

"Fantastic." Nick spat bitterly as her screams engulfed the room.

Jess rolled her eyes and bent down to pick the crying infant up, "Shhhhh it's ok. Did those stupid boys wake you up?"

"Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!" Schmidt wailed from the other room. "My eye!"

"Why the hell did you punch the lamp you moron?" Coach yelled.

"To teach you a lesson you rapscallion!" Schmidt spat back.

"Schmidt!" CeCe's voice now cried over the ruckus. "You guys are both idiots!"

"Well you have lain with both of us mi'lady!" Schmidt yelled back.

"Why the hell are you talking like you're from Game of Thrones?" Coach asked.

"If only!" Schmidt cried, "Then I would avenge my honour with a broad sword and not this piece of crap lamp Jess brought."

"Ah man, I loved that lamp." Jess groaned to herself as she tried gently bobbing Ella back and forth but the continuing yells and crashes from the living room seemed to be too much for her, her face turning a scary shade of red as she continued to bellow.

"That's it." Nick growled gripping tightly on the edge of the stroller. "We're getting the hell out of here!"

---

"Err Nick…don't you think Ella's a little young for this?" Jess asked dubiously.

"Don't talk crazy Jessica; you're never too young for monkeys….or too old." Nick countered knowing exactly what she was about to say next. "Look Ella that one looks like it's got a moustache…that's funny!"

Nick let out a genuinely excited squeal pointing at the small blue and yellowed faced fluffy monkey as it swung onto a branch, Jess laughing as she pushed Ella's stroller, Nick's arm wrapped loosely around her waist. Jess was grinning at Nick's childlike excitement but also because she liked how this felt, she liked the way they looked like all the other families enjoying a sunny day at the zoo. Just like Nick's things side by side in her room, it felt right.

Jess had been pleasantly surprised by Nick's escape plan from the loft drama; Griffith Park Zoo was definitely more fun than hiding out in her room whilst her best friend, roommate and former roommate all had an emotional and lamp-breaking heart to heart.

"I can't believe Schmidt actually tried to punch Coach." Jess said, still shocked.

Nick snorted, "I can't believe he didn't do more damage than breaking your ugly lamp. The last time Schmidt got into a fight he ended up with two bruised ribs and a fractured ankle."

"Oh my god." Jess gasped. "What the hell happened?"

"Schmidt was wearing these ridiculous man-sandals and slipped. The other guy didn't even touch him." Nick shook his head. "Schmidt is not a fighter."

Given today's events Jess was inclined to agree, "Do you think they'll work it out?"

Nick paused clearly thinking, "Hope so. Schmidt's many things but he's a good friend, in his way…codes and rules and all that crap are real important to him." Nick looked to Jess. "Remember the whole no-nail oath?"

Jess grinned at the memory, of course when she had found out she'd been furious and offended but now she couldn't help but think of it fondly, remembering Nick's reasons for signing it in the first place.

It was me Jess…I couldn't help it.

"Let's forget about those morons and go check out the gorillas. What d'ya say?" Nick asked bending down to Ella. "C'mon look how excited she is!"

Unconvinced Jess bent her head down and found that Ella looked rather unfazed by all the hustle and bustle around her, currently far more interested in trying to fit her whole fist in her mouth.

"She's on the edge of her seat." Jess teased.

Nick frowned at Jess as he pushed them in the direction of the huge gorilla reserve; he was practically skipping with excitement.

"Wow." He said in total awe when they arrived.

There were three huge gorillas sitting together on the grass, slowly munching on leaves and branches, paying no attention to the crowd gathered around them.

"I freakin' love monkeys." Nick cried.

"Actually gorillas are apes; they're much higher up the evolutionary scale. In fact…" Jess corrected before she could stop herself, her voice trailing off at the annoyed look on Nick's face. "Sorry."

"Whatever they are they're awesome." Nick said with a shrug, looking back at the animals, literally jumping for joy as more gorillas slowly appeared, pointing excitedly trying to get Ella's attention once more. "Look there's a baby one!"

Jess looked up to where Nick was frantically waving his hand as a slighter gorilla appeared into the clearing, moving just as powerfully with a much smaller toddler sized gorilla on its back, playing with its mothers fur. Eagerly Nick bent down and picked Ella up, trying his hardest to get her to look anywhere close to the general direction of the gorilla compound.

"Look kid, look at the big monk…apes." He said flashing a quick look to Jess then expectantly back to Ella. "Look!"

Ella however seemed to be far more interested in Nick's facial hair, her tiny hands lightly tugging at the soft hair of his almost full beard.

"These are some of the most majestic creatures on the planet and you're more interested in my damn beard!" he snapped though there was no real irritation in his voice.

Jess smiled, she was with Ella on this one. "Give her a break Nick, she's three months old."

"Kids today." Nick muttered playfully as he tossed Ella a little too high in the air.

Jess's heart leapt every time Nick threw her above his head, seeming to get higher every time but Ella only squealed and giggled in delight. Despite her ever growing anxiety Jess watched the family like scene with a massive grin, her heart thundering in her chest for an entirely different reason. She was still boggled at just how amazing Nick was with Ella.

When Jess first met Nick she thought she'd figured him out right away, he was her lazy, generally grumpy sometimes hilarious, socially and emotionally inept turtled faced roommate. But two years later Jess realised there was so much more to Nick Miller than anyone knew. Yes he was all those things but he was also sweet and thoughtful and protective of Jess in a way no one had been before. Even before they started dating Nick was always there, listening to her, encouraging her, taking care of her. From the moment he'd burst into that fancy restaurant and sand Time of my Life Jess thought; this guy…this guy is something special.

But they were just roommates and then friends so Jess had shushed that voice in her head, fought the butterflies she felt whenever he made her laugh, every time he told her to believe in herself the way he did, every time he came back for her…but now she didn't have to. Now as she watched Nick and Ella giggle elatedly with one another Jess let the butterflies flutter free, agreeing once again with that voice in her head; this guy…this guy is something special.

Jess must have been so lot in her daydream she'd been staring at Nick a lot longer than she thought as he now looked back with a bemused frown.

"You ok?" he asked walking closer a delighted looking Ella in his arms.

"Wh…yeah." Jess replied with a small shake of her head. "Just thinking."

Nick raised one eyebrow, "About what?"

"Nothin'." Jess replied unable to stop the smirk on her face.

"Uh-uh." Nick replied, a questioning look in his eyes. "Well me and my associate here…" he began nodding to Ella.

"Your associate?" Jess asked with a laugh.

Nick nodded his face serious. "Yes. Now my associate and I were discussing where to head next and it turns out Miss Ella is very excited to watch the elephant show."

Jess chuckled as Nick tried and failed to hide his own excitement, "Oh really, Ella wants to see the show?"

Nick responded by holding Ella up in front of his face, wiggling her from side to side gently.

"C'mon doll-face dontcha wanna see Dumbo fly?" he said behind her in a very strange sounding voice somewhere between a cartoon baby and a bad Al Capone impression.

"What's with the voice?" Jess asked.

Nick lowered Ella with a shrug, "That's how she sounds in my head."

---

And so they saw the elephants, then the lions, giraffes, zebras and yet more monkeys. Nick was in his element as she showed Ella all the wonderful animals desperately trying to get her to react or just look in the general direction of what he was pointing at. On the whole Ella seemed uninterested, she really was too young but Jess was impressed at Nick's continued efforts. She also found the voices he kept using particularly adorable, even if his cockney was more a bad Australian accent.

However Ella's tolerance reached its limit at the black bear enclosure when one of the enormous beasts let out a fierce and bellowing roar that echoed and shook the ground where her instinctual (and understandable) reaction was to scream right back. Nick had quickly employed his previous baby whispering methods but unfortunately this time to no avail.

The more Ella wailed and cried the more the bear growled and grumbled, and vice versa, it was as though they were having a competition to see who could make the most ear piercing noise. Quickly they fled the bear enclosure, Ella still screeching like a banshee turning an increasingly violent shade of red as she twisted and turned in Nick's arms. People began to stare as they struggled to calm her down.

"Here, take her." Nick barked shoving Ella into Jess's arms before she had a chance to argue.

"What…Nick!" Jess stammered as Ella fought her grasp. "What do I do?"

Nick ignored her, muttering to himself as he ripped the diaper bag open, rummaging in a panicked state. Jess took a deep breath, trying to remember Nick's Yoda-esque teachings from this morning but nothing seemed to be working.

"There, there. It's ok, shhh pretty girl." She plead in what she hoped was a soothing voice. Ella only let out a painful shriek in response. "Shhhhh shhhh."

Jess continued to struggle with the distressed infant and noticed a group of Stepford looking women, whose children were all pristinely turned out and impeccably well behaved, giving her the most judgemental looks. Jess turned her back, trying to push the disapproving faces from her mind, not wanting all her fears and doubts from this morning to creep back in.

"Aha!" Nick cried triumphantly jumping to his feet, a frantic look in his eyes and a fluffy pink shape clutched in his hands.

Nick said nothing more as he snatched Ella back into his arms, Jess didn't argue, she simply watched with a hopeful look as Nick shoved the toy in Ella's face, pressed her close against his chest and started to rock her gently but firmly. Slowly her shrieks became cries which became whimpers which finally subsided to an intermittent sniffing as her breathing began to calm.

"There we go kiddo, no need to freak out. Ya got ya bunny." Nick said softly as Ella's tiny hands tightened around the pink and now Jess could see closer slightly stained and worn rabbit toy in her grasp. It was clearly well loved.

"The pink bunny." Jess said letting out a huge sigh of relief. "Nick you brilliant bastard."

"Jessica! Language!" Nick tutted at her.

Jess merely grinned in response. "C'mon Miller, this rounds on me."

---

Jess stood tapping her foot in what felt like the longest line ever, having taken no more than five steps forward in the past twenty minutes. She looked to the poor teenage cashier as he did his best to complete the seemingly never-ending order of the particularly snarky woman at the head of the line. Jess was eight or so people behind, not that she minded, she was happy to stand and watch Nick and Ella playing across the concourse, Nick most likely continuing to complain that Jess had meant ice cream and not beer when she offered to buy the next round.

Jess watched with prideful joy as Nick twisted and pulled his face into a mix of strange expressions, eyes wide and tongue out making Ella, who seemed to particularly like his trademark turtle face, laugh and giggle. Wanting to capture the moment and finally show Nick the expression she had teased him about for so long Jess whipped out her phone and took a few photos.

As the snarky woman finally got her order Jess shuffled forward, sweeping through the pictures, most weren't that great, too blurry from their movements but Jess seemed to have took one good one; Nick wasn't making the turtle face but he was looking at Ella with the warmest and most adoring smile, Jess let out a faint breath at the endearing image in her hands.

"Cute picture." A long weary sounding voice said behind her.

Jess jumped at the sound, instinctively bringing the phone to her chest as she turned to find it was one of the judgemental looking Stepford wives from earlier, a tall, thin blonde, dressed entirely in pastel colours like something out of the Ralph Lauren summer catalogue. Jess blinked a little startled.

"Thanks." She said with an awkward smile.

"How old?" the woman asked.

Jess was not that attuned to baby conversations but she was pretty sure the question was about Ella and not Nick or her iPhone.

"Three months." Jess answered.

"They're so adorable at that age." The woman replied pleasantly enough, gone was the judgement Jess felt, or perhaps imagined, before. "What's her name?"

"Ella." Jess replied in a more friendly manner.

"Well Ella seems like a real daddy's girl…" The woman said smiling towards Ella and Nick.

Jess choked back a laugh, actually she has two mommies¸ she replied in her head and was about to explain the truth of the situation but it seemed the Stepford woman was not finished.

"…and I can see why, your husband's great with her." she continued though her warm smile fell slightly as she added, "You wouldn't get my husband off the couch today, let alone out for family day at the zoo…"

Jess chuckled nervously, was this what mothers did, complain to total strangers about their husbands? Jess wasn't sure how to respond, or how best to explain what Ella was not her daughter and Nick not her husband…yet, the hopeful voice added.

"…far too many Buds last night." The woman continued bitterly completely unaware Jess hadn't listened to a word she'd said, though clearly someone had not had a happy Fourth of July.

Jess shuffled forward as the line grew shorter, "Ha yeah…guys and beer."

What was she saying; chatting away with this woman about husbands and kids was crazy. Again the Stepford woman didn't seem to notice Jess's nervous state, she turned to look at Ella and Nick playing happily together and smiled once more.

"He seems like one of the good ones." She said quietly.

Jess looked to Nick, heart swelling in her chest, a feeling so strong, unlike anything she had felt before. Nick seemed to sense her gaze, looking up at her with his usual Nick Miller half-grin as he whispered in Ella's ear and waved her tiny hand in Jess's direction.

"Yeah he is."

Those secret hopeful dream-like images flashed in Jess's mind, those one day thoughts of Nick sitting across the zoo holding a child with his half-smile and Jess's blue eyes. Jess was so lost in her fantasy future day dream she suddenly aware the Stepford woman was staring at her.

"…sorry, what was that?" Jess asked trying to gather herself.

"Aren't you going to get that?" The woman asked pointing to the phone ringing and vibrating in her hand.

Confused Jess looked down as the picture she'd just taken of Nick and Ella was now replaced with Sadie's name flashing on the screen. Panic slowly spread through her.

"Yes, sorry, I have to take this it's my…" she stammered before her voice trailed off, not sure what to say that wouldn't make her seem like a crazy person after all her lies through omission. "…dog…butler."

Yep because that didn't sound insane at all, a voice snarled in her head. The woman's face twisted into a confused expression but Jess turned away before she could ask any more questions, clicking answer.

---

"Jeez finally." Nick gruffed as Jess returned to the picnic bench, a colourful ice cream cone in each hand. "What did ya have to wait for it to be shipped in from Iceland?"

"Nick you do know ice cream doesn't come from Iceland right? That's not thing." Jess asked genuinely concerned as she sat and handed his cone.

"Yeah, I know." He replied sheepishly muttering about another one of Schmidt's false facts, one arm wrapped around Ella sat happily on his lap.

Jess took a lick of her mint choc chip cone and took a deep breath. "Sadie called."

"Everything ok?" Nick asked with a slight frown at Jess's anxious tone.

Jess nodded not letting herself meet his eyes, "Yeah her and Melissa are just running a little late so she asked if we could watch Ella for a little while longer…"

"How much longer?" Nick asked licking his chocolate cone.

"Just a little while…until like…six or seven." Jess mumbled nervously, looking up expecting to see Nick's exasperated face. "That ok?"

Nick simply give a light shrug in response, "Sure, I'm cool to hang with my associate a little while longer…" he said with a nod to the cooing child on his lap. "…but what about tonight?"

"Tonight?" Jess asked relieved at Nick's response but confused by his question.

"Date night." Nick replied.

Jess had been so occupied with the baby madness and CeCe/Coach/Schmidt soap-opera drama she'd totally forgotten about their date night.

Airily she waved her hand, "Its ok we'll have date night when we're marrie…dur be dur be durr…" she trailed off nonsensically as she heard the almost words leave her mouth.

Nick's eyebrows immediately shot up though in a look of surprise rather than horror, the slightest trace of a smile of his face. "What did you just…"

Jess shook her head a little, panic rushing through her body. "Merry! When we're merry Christmas!" she yelled in a sing-song voice.

Nick narrowed his eyes, "Jess what…"

"Hey mister you better eat this ice cream before it melts and we have to get Iceland to ship over some more!" she barked hurriedly. "Here try this!"

In a complete panic move Jess launched across the table and shoved her cone against Nick's mouth mid-sentence. Nicks head jolted back by her unexpected action, eyes blinking as the cold green liquid smeared across his lips and beard.

"Mmmmm good right?" Jess said licking it as she sat back on her side of the bench.

Nick scoffed as he placed his own cone in the hand wrapped securely around Ella whilst the now free one reached for a napkin.

"I'd still rather have a beer." He grumbled as he wiped his beard.

"Let it go, remember the last time you drank at the zoo, Hemmingway?" she teased, relieved at the change in the conversation. Her eyes suddenly went wide as she burst into giggles. "Err Nick, I think your associate wants some of your ice cream?"

"Huh?" Nick asked confused.

Laughing louder Jess pointed to his right, Nick looked down to see Ella had rubbed what remained of his chocolate ice cream all over herself and Nick's pants, in a very unfortunate location given its dark brown colour.

"Son of a…" Nick began.

"Nicholas, language!" Jess teased unable to stop herself from laughing.

---

"I can't hear any yelling or crying in there…" Jess said quietly tilting her head towards the Loft door. "Do you think everything's ok?"

"Guess we're about to find out." Nick grumbled as he turned Jess's key in the lock, as usual having forgotten his own.

Nick edged the door open slowly and more cautiously than his normal heavy-handed style and entered the loft.

"Guys?" he called out into the strangely quiet apartment. It was more of a hiss than a yell due to the sleeping baby behind him. "Hello…anybody here? Coach? Schmidt?"

Nick surveyed the seemingly deserted living room and kitchen, hearing no movement or sounds from any of the other rooms turned back to Jess with a small shrug. "No one's home."

He mumbled simply before marching off towards his own room. Jess shot a small frown at his back as she gently pushed Ella's stroller, setting it carefully beside the couch then sat on the edge of the red leather surveying the eerie quiet around her.

Her broken lamp from Schmidt's ill-fated attempt at fisticuffs had been cleared away, as had all the party trash. In fact the place looked cleaner than ever, not a speck of dust could be seen and everything was set neatly in its place, yet something felt off. Hearing the sound of Nick's usual shuffled footsteps Jess turned to see he had returned in a pair of ice-cream free pants.

"Schmidt cleaned up. The place is immaculate." Jess said quietly knowing only one of her roommates could be responsible for the lofts current show home like state. "I guessed they figured things out."

"Probably." Nick nodded in agreement. "Or Schmidt killed the both of 'em and needed to clean up the crime scene."

Jess chuckled at his words, "Yeah and he's probably out with Winston right now disposing of the bodies."

They both laughed this time, a little louder than before then suddenly stopped as the likelihood of that scenario played in both their minds. Wide-eyed they looked at one another, sharing silent thoughts of genuine concern.

"Do you think maybe we should…" Jess began to say trying to not panic when the all too familiar sound of the day filled her ears. She let out a groan her entire body going limp as Ella's cries grew louder.

"Look we can't worry about Schmidt now; we've got one tiny nut-job to deal with already!" Nick growled as he bent to pick Ella up.

---

Despite the fears lingering at the back of her mind that Schmidt was somewhere preparing himself for a one hour special on America's Most Wanted Jess actually had a great day, spent in a blissful bubble of what one day might be.

After Nick expertly fed, winded and changed Ella (again) the two of them crashed out on the couch and watched TV. Nick wanted to make sure Ella was well educated from a young age on important cultural shows such as Scooby Doo and Looney Tunes. Jess had watched on contentedly as Nick rolled around making silly faces and voices causing Ella to giggle and squeal in delight.

Feeling less anxious than earlier Jess had joined them, enjoying herself a little too much creating a number of varied and geographically obscure accented characters for Ella's stuff animal collection. Her new-found confidence had hit a slight snag when she had tried to recreate Nick's moves of spinning and throwing Ella in the air, instead of gleeful giggling Jess was rewarded with a face full of spit-up.

As Jess cleaned herself up in the bathroom she grinned smugly hearing Ella's continued roar from the other room.

"C'momn kid just gimme a break would ya…I'm just trying to get you clean…" she heard Nick plead. "No don't do that…ahh see you just rolled right in the barf…great and now it's on my shirt!"

Jess's grin grew wider, ha serves you right Mr. Baby Whisperer, she thought to herself. Once Jess felt semi-clean again she tossed her puke covered dress in the laundry and slipped on clean one before shuffling back to the screaming infant.

"Nope, I'm not doing it ok?" she heard Nick say firmly over Ella's cries.

Jess stopped, her face falling into a confused frown, clearly she'd missed something.

"Look I got ya all nice and clean, here's ya stupid bunny so chill out ok…" he continued. "Ah c'mon now don't…don't look at me like that…I'm not…" Nick protested as Ella continued to wail but Jess could already hear the surrender in his voice. "Oh for the love of…fine, ok you win."

Ella's only response was her continued wailing, Nick cleared his throat, Jess lent her ear in closer to hear, her curiosity beyond piqued

"I kissed a girl and I liked it…" Nick's croaky voice sang out, trying to quieten Ella's cries. "The taste of her…err something something…god what the hell I am doing?"

Jess brought her hand to her mouth to stop herself from laughing, Ella in turned screamed loudly as Nick stopped singing.

"Ok, ok, jeez…I kissed a girl just to trrrry it. I hope my boyfriend don't like it…"

Desperate to get a visual to match the hilarious sounds in her ears Jess snuck her head around the corner of the iron curtain to see Nick pacing back and forth as he continued to serenade the crying child in his arms.

"It felt so wrong, it felt so right…no wonder your mom's sing this crap to you…" he muttered as Ella grumbled. "I kissed a girl and I liked itttttt."

Jess beamed watching as Nick sang the chorus over and over again (unsurprisingly he didn't know any of the verses) and somehow it seemed to work. Slowly Ella's cries began to fade, replaced with a soft content gurgling sound. It was without a doubt the most adorable if not slightly ridiculous thing Jess had ever seen.

Before she could stop herself Jess let her mind flash forward to the not so distant future, picturing the little boy and girl she tried so hard not to wish for. She thought back to CeCe's words from the party, I mean it Jess; you guys are the real deal. I see it, you know, a future, house, kids all that stuff. Feeling her heart thunder desperately in her heart Jess realised just how much she wanted it for her own, and how much she wanted it with Nick. It was completely exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.

"I kissed a…" Nick continued softly his sing-song words stopping as he turned and saw Jess watching him. "Ah crap."

"I'm pretty sure that's not the next line. Then again I'm not a Katy Perry expert like you Miller." Jess teased moving away from her hiding spot.

"Not a word about this Jessica." He warned.

Jess laughed again as she reached out playfully wiggling Ella's teeny foot, about to tell Nick that there would in fact be many, many words said about this when the loft door opened, Schmidt appearing in the doorway along, clutching a plastic grocery bag in one hand and smoothie in the other.

"Dear god, aren't you done playing house yet?" Schmidt barked gesturing to the family-like scene before him. "Well don't let that thing make a mess. It's taken me all day to get this place back to a semi-hygienic level."

With a sneer he brushed past them into the kitchen, muttering how he was sure babies were more dangerous than rats in spreading disease as he unpacked his groceries, which turned out to be all cleaning products and tools. Jess and Nick exchanged worried looks.

"Schmidt…what's all that?" Nick asked dubiously.

"Yes Nick I can imagine this must be an almost alien sight to your slothful eyes. These are cleaning supplies." Schmidt said gruffly. "I used my standard and back up stock deep-cleaning this place."

Jess gulped at his words whilst Nick made a scared wide-eyed turtle face.

"I'll tell ya cleaning up some of those stains was bloody murder!" Schmidt said flippantly.

Jess let out an actual gasp, "My god Schmidt what have you done? Where are they?"

"Where the hell is who?" Schmidt barked.

"CeCe!" Jess cried. "And Coach?"

"Don't forget Winston, he's missing too! What, did he know too much?" Nick asked eyeing his friend suspiciously.

"What…missing? I don't…" Schmidt stammered staring at the pair of them a totally puzzled look on his face. "It's nice to see the Miller-Days are making as much sense as always." He snapped leaning against the kitchen counter. "Winston is currently on his way, his favourite puzzle in hand, to terrorise some poor young woman and as for Cecelia and Coach, I really have no idea…maybe they're out on their date."

"Their what?! Nick and Jess both yelled in unison, even Ella let out a squeal of surprise.

"A date." Schmidt snapped growing increasingly tired of his roommates continual questioning. "What one tends to do to find a spouse as opposed to simply copulating loudly and constantly with ones roommate."

Nick glared at Schmidt but ignored his comment. "How are they on a date?"

"Yeah Schmidt what about all your ridiculous rules and all that other misogynistic crap you spout?" Jess chimed in.

"Do not mock my belief system Jessica. And here I thought as a teacher you'd promote religious tolerance." Schmidt snapped giving Jess a judgemental sneer.

"Bros-over-hoes is not a religion Schmidt." Jess replied shaking her head.

Schmidt ignored her turning to face Nick instead, "Once you two left to continue your struggle against this living advertisement to the benefits of contraception…" Schmidt said nodding to Ella.

"Jar." Nick growled hugging the baby a little closer to his chest.

Schmidt simply rolled his eyes and continued. "Anyways things got heated with Coach again, things were said, challenges were made, pogo's were brought up. I tell ya there was a moment or two where I had to stop these bad boys taking over." Schmidt said looking meaningfully down at his fists.

Nick snorted. "Sure thing Rocky. Which piece of innocent furniture did you assault this time?"

"If you weren't holding the drooling love-child of my favourite lesbian life-partners right now…" Schmidt growled as Nick chuckled teasingly.

"Schmidt!" Jess snapped. "Just tell us what happened!"

And so Schmidt explained what had happened and the truth was even more unbelievable than Jess realised

"Wait, wait, it was your idea?" she asked incredulously.

Schmidt nodded his head rather too quickly, an almost frantic smile appearing on his face. "Yes. When listening to Coach's pleas of forgiveness for breaking the holy guy-code of sleeping with a bro's former hoe…"

"Jar." Jess said scrunching her face up in revulsion.

"...I suddenly realised I had broken the code as well!" Schmidt cried as though he'd truly had a eureka moment. "I hadn't been there for my boy in pain after his breakup with Malia and gotten him some premium rebound tail."

"I'm sure CeCe loved being referred to as that." Jess muttered still processing what Schmidt was saying to them.

"In fact, she did not." Schmidt said still smiling. "She threw her shoe at me, hit me right on the temple, see?"

Jess looked and nodded to where Schmidt pointed to the pink graze just above his left eye. CeCe did like to throw things when she got mad, or drunk, or excited. To be honest Jess thought Schmidt had gotten off lightly.

"I still don't get what the hell happened." Nick said with a confused turtle face expression.

Schmidt looked at him exasperated, "C'mon Nick you're the almost lawyer here, you should know that in the International Laws & Legislation of the Guy-Code…"

"That's not a thing Schmidt." Jess barked.

Nick shushed her and looked back to his insane friend. "Continue."

"…Two wrongs do in face make a right." Schmidt replied simply.

Jess shook her head, "That's it, so everything's just fine now?"

Schmidt nodded his head quickly again, his maniacal smile growing wider, "Exactly! I'm fine, Coach is fine, CeCe's fine. Everything's fine, fine, fine!" he cried far too enthusiastically.

"Oooooook." Jess said actually backing away from him. "I can get on board with the absurd guy-logic that's stopped you and Coach smashing any more of my lamps but how did you go from that to him and CeCe going on a date?"

Schmidt's terrifying smile widened. "Why not? He's single, she's single, they're both exceptionally good-looking people of colour, and they've already had duplicitous heart-crushing intercourse why not grab a cup of coffee or take in a show together? See where this crazy train goes."

"Ya got the crazy part right." Nick muttered now looking at his friend with concern. "Dude are you sure you're ok with all this?"

"Of course Nick, I'm finnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnne!" Schmidt said for what felt like the hundredth time in five minutes before he grabbed a bottle of bleach and freshly opened sponge. "Now if you three excuse me I need to go finish cleaning the residue of lust and betrayal off the bathroom tiles."

And with that Schmidt skipped away, humming to himself. Nick reached out for Jess's arm turning her to face him whilst Ella wriggled in the other.

"Look I've known Schmidt for a long time and despite what he just said he is not fine."

Jess blinked at Nick's words. "Jeez Nick thanks, I totally didn't pick up on that."

"You're welcome." Nick replied completely oblivious to her sarcastic tone.

Jess rolled her eyes and flailed her arms at her side, "What the hell are we going to do? This is going to be a total disaster!"

Nick gave a light shrug, "Nah maybe it won't be so bad."

Jess put her hands on her hips and gave him the 'be serious Nick' look. Nick let out a heavy sigh and groaned.

"Fine yes this is probably going to be the worst thing that has ever happened and will ruin all our lives!" he yelled dramatically. "Sorry." He added to Ella as she grumbled in his arms, frowning at his sharp tone. Nick looked back to Jess. "Whatever happens Jess there's not a whole lot we can do about it tonight."

Jess nodded, he was right, it had already been what felt like the longest day since the dawn of time, she really didn't have the energy for any more right now.

"So…" she said with a sigh, cocking her head to one side. "Tomorrow's problem?"

Nick nodded as Ella proceeded to chew on the collar of his shirt. "Tomorrows problem."

---

"Dinners readyyyyy!" Jess called out as she set the final dishes down on the dining table.

There were three places set, two plates one accompanied by a well-deserved rose for Jess and a Heisler for Nick and at the other a pink binky and array of stuffed animals to keep Ella occupied as they ate.

"Thanks doll." Nick said setting Ella's car seat on the chair opposite his before taking his own. "This looks good."

"It's just pasta and salad Nick." Jess said with a smile as she sat, reaching for her wine, her fingers barely brushed against the cool glass when a light tapping came at the loft door. Jess stood back up scraping her chair against the floor. "Eurgh, I'll get it."

Nick nodded in response swigging his beer as Jess sluggishly made her way to the door, her limbs feeling beyond tired and heavy after all she'd done today. Stifling a yawn she slowly creaked open the door, her exhausted state vanishing as she saw a familiar face on the other side.

"Sadie…hey." She said blinking slightly as she opened the door wider. "Come in, come in."

"Thanks." Sadie replied her bright smile transforming into the biggest grin as her eyes landed on her daughter across the room. "There's my cutie pie."

"Here I am." Nick said getting to his feet as Sadie moved towards the table.

"Hello to you too Nick." Sadie chuckled as she swept Ella into her arms, who cooed and giggled in absolute delight at being reunited with her mother. "Hello sweetness I have missed you so much today." Sadie said in between planting kisses all over Ella's chubby cheeks. "Have you been a good girl for Auntie Jess and Uncle Nick?"

"She's been perfect, really…" Jess answered a little too quickly. "The whole day was a walk in the park."

"Really?" Sadie asked the disbelief clear in her voice.

Jess looked to Nick who was staring at her with his own dumbfounded look, had she not experienced the same day he had? Jess gave a quick nod of her head, psychically informing her boyfriend it was (as usual) his job to agree with her.

Nick let out a small grunt, "Yup, totally, a walk in the park."

Sadie looked taken aback but impressed (and maybe a little relieved?). "Wow, when are you free next?"

"Hahahahaha." Jess laughed nervously, as much as she had ultimately enjoyed today with Ella it would be awhile before she would offer up her babysitting duties again. Quickly wanting to change the subject she asked, "So how was your day?"

Sadie's beamed and launched into a lengthy and descriptive outline of her and Melissa's amazing childless day, which included couple's massage, body scrubs and facials, luxurious lunches with champagne and chocolates followed by some quality (and according to Sadie well overdue) wife-on-wife alone time. Jess was relieved Schmidt was out shopping for even more cleaning supplies and not there to ask for a detailed play-by-play. Whilst Sadie's final comment appeared to get Nick all flustered and embarrassed as he clumsily dashed around the apartment collecting Ella's numerous scattered belongings.

Ten minutes of Nick rounding up stuffed animals later and it was time to say goodbye.

"Thanks again for today you guys." Sadie said appreciatively pulling Jess in for a hug. "It really meant a lot."

"Anytime." Jess said looking at the bundle of cuteness nuzzling into her mother's arm, all thoughts of exhaustion temporarily forgotten. Automatically Jess lent her body into Nick's. "Right Nick?"

Nick nodded, draping his arm around her waist. "Sure. Any excuse to look a monkeys fine by me, right kiddo?" tiggling Ella's teeny foot causing her to squeal and giggle.

Sadie laughed, "So you like your Uncle Nick huh?"

"Please." Nick pulled back, a pretend smug look on his face. "All the ladies like Nick Miller."

Jess and Sadie both rolled their eyes but Ella only giggled again.

"And on that note its time to say goodbye." Sadie said, leaning her head to her daughters. "Say bye-bye Ella, bye-bye."

Sadie moved Ella's tiny hand in a wave as they strolled towards the elevator.

"Bye ladies." Jess said waving, still leaning against Nick's chest.

"See ya around kid." Nick gave one final wave as they stepped into the elevator.

Jess closed the door with a sigh before Nick tugged at her waist guiding her back to the table. He pulled out her chair before sliding back into his own but Jess didn't sit.

"Food's gone cold." She said quietly.

Nick shrugged shoved a fork-load of pasta into his mouth and mumbled, "It's fine Jess."

With a half-shrug Jess slid into her seat, not sure if she was just too exhausted or if something else was bothering her. She reached for her now room-temperature glass of wine when something brightly coloured caught her eye on the now empty chair to her left. Curious she reached down and found it was one of Ella's animal toys, a small yellow chick Nick had bizarrely named Eduardo.

"You missed one." Jess said placing the fluffy toy on the table.

"Ah Eduardo my friend!" Nick cried. "What will Pablo do without you?"

"Who?" Jess asked almost choking on her rose.

"Pablo the elephant, he and Eduardo are best friends." Nick said simply.

"Of course." Jess nodded grinning. "Hey, thanks for today Nick…I couldn't have gotten through it without you. Seriously you were amazing."

"It's no big deal Jess." He said shrugging off her words, as always he struggled to accept praise. He paused for a moment, fingers fidgeting with his beer bottle before he said. "She's a pretty cute kid."

Jess smiled, "Yeah."

Nick's face fell into an inquisitive turtle face. "Do you think they'll have any more?"

Jess sat back in her chair, thinking for a moment. "I don't know, they haven't said but Sadie's from a big family so maybe."

Nick raised his eyebrows still staring at the bottle in his hand. "Big families aren't always what they're cracked up to be." He mumbled taking a sip.

Jess frowned; there was something in his tone that bothered her. Tracing her hands around the rim of her wine glass, her eyes looking anywhere but at him she asked quietly.

"Do you ever think about it…" her hand moving slowly. "…about kids and stuff?"

She said the last few words so quickly they practically blurred into one before she gulped down what remained in her glass. Not that it mattered, Nick had heard clearly, he also knew exactly what she meant by 'stuff'. 'Stuff' was a house in the sub-burbs, a beaten up mini-van, hours wasted at little league games and school plays, painful family road trips and vacations.

Of course Nick had thought about it, in previous relationships all thoughts of commitment and marriage, of kids and the future had absolutely terrified him. Nick had meant what he'd said this morning, he was good with kids, he liked being fun Uncle Nick all his nieces and nephews wanted to see but Nick Miller as a dad? That wasn't something entirely different, something scary, something real, something he couldn't let himself screw up.

But as he looked at Jess's half-hopeful, half-terrified eyes trying to avoid his, he didn't feel that same gut twisting fear. Nick thought about that house in the burbs, most likely decorated with an excess of scented candles and polka-dot throw pillows and it didn't seem so bad. The mini-van that would always have a tin of hard candies and knitting needles in the glove compartment wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. He thought about the little league games where'd he be made to sing along with silly made up songs cheering on the boy with the scruffy brown hair and the biggest blue eyes and thought it actually sounded kinda fun. Even the excruciating family vacations, probably in Portland with a father-in-law who hated him sounded fine by Nick.

As Nick thought about that future it didn't feel scary at all, in fact it was suddenly the thing Nick realised he wanted more than anything before. If he could somehow manage to grab himself even the tiniest piece of that future he was one lucky son of bitch indeed.

Nick suddenly became aware he'd probably been quiet for a lot longer than he should given what Jess had just asked him. He looked down at her shaking hand as it fell from the glass, retreating back across the table, her eyes still trying to look anywhere but at him. He reached for her hand, squeezing it a little harder than was necessary but unable to stop his nerves.

"Yeah, I guess it'd be nice…someday." He answered looking at her. "You?"

Unable to stop herself Jess was now looking directly at him, hearing the slight crack in his voice with his final word she smiled.

"Yeah…" she said entwining her fingers with his. "…someday."

---

A/N: Reviews ?